…but between Emi’s blast, and Badia and Randy battling the brain from within their respective dreams, the Bad-Ass Mother Brain is overwhelmed, overpowered, and just plain over!
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Emi resists and fills the dome with sand! Mother Brain responds, Such insolence! Perhaps you envy my hourglass figure! The dome becomes an hourglass. It’ll take an hour to get sand in the brain now. Unless of course the dome gets smashed to bits by a rampaging orc! Badia sees the cannons falling straight to hell, and after leaping from falling brick to falling brick in a way that no elf believably could, Badia’s axe shatters the brain dome and starts hacking into actual brain! Oh yeah, well… Randy resists the brain’s attack, then turns her defensive tactic well to his advantage! The already scrambled Mother Brain is fried as well! Delirious and desperate, the brain uses its strongest attack! …you can only beat me—in your dreams!
Badia:
Your mother—or rather, Mother Brain dressed as a six-and-a-half-foot-tall green-skinned woman sporting curlers in a brain three times the diameter of her orcish head—puts one hand on the hip of her studded leather apron, and with the other, waggles her +2 Rolling Pin of the Unleavened Helldough at you. “Stop it! Stop that this instant, young lady! You’ll end up just like your human father!” Your human father is a beardless dwarf with a silly mustache. You’ve never seen this person in your life, but when he says, “It’s a-meeeee, Daddy-o!” you momentarily take his word for it. He is wearing a green jumpsuit with a frog head as a hood. He says, “C’mon, let’s a-go!” He leads you to jump from sofa to refrigerator top to rooftop to cloud to the moon (on which a gray-skinned couple picnics happily) to a series of platforms floating in outer space. There you are attacked by a fire-breathing brain with a spiky turtle shell that renders it jump-on proof. Your father proves this by jumping on the brain and immediately impaling himself on a spike. Across the platform is your axe, which is conveniently placed next to a rusty chain which you somehow know is the only thing holding up this structure.
Emi:
The waiter opens a can of peanut brittle. Poisonous snakes lash at your face! You’re immune, but it’s still very very scary! “Ssssssnnnnake Surprizzzzze!” the waiter announces, “And for dessert, Chilled Monkey Brain!” The Velvet Ape busts through the wall, killing several Imhotopian diners as falling bricks and rafters bash their heads in. You can only see him from the neck up, until his hands—which suddenly seem bigger than YOU!—rip the ceiling open! The ape’s head is that of Mother Brain, but with a huge simian mouth. “I scream for dessert!” You find yourself ON the long table now. The dead diners appear as giants—or is it you that is suddenly a few inches tall? Mother Brain sits at the table—she is wearing a black tuxedo and in each of her ape hands, she is gripping a fork. Forks stab at you! You run! Eventually the ape’s foot grabs you like a hand and flings you into her mouth. You stand there on her tongue, and her uvula taunts you, “You… dummy.” That’s all she’s got. The uvula twists into a confused expression as it tries in vain to come up with a wittier put-down.
Randy:
“It’s one hundred six miles to Shítopia. We’ve got half a tank of water. It’s dark. And we’re wearing sunglasses.” Your line is ‘hit it.’ You realize this after you don’t say it. “BOOOOOOOOOO!” says the studio audience. They throw tomatoes. One hits your costar, who says, “What’s your problem? I didn’t blow my line,” only the word line comes out more like AAAAAAAAAAAH!! as the acidic juices burn though the dreamcoat, and all of his skin. A still screaming skeleton collapses to the floor, smoldering. You RUN. You dodge acidic vegetables as best you can. A pie fight busts out as you run though a cafeteria. Pie plates decapitate pie-fighters. The cherry-bomb-on-top blasts several people to flaming pieces. There’s so much blood you’re almost certain to slip on it! You eventually get onto the highway, and use your thumb and/or leg to stop a steam truck. You get in, and the driver calls herself Large Marge but once she accelerates to 106 MPH, you realize it’s Mother Brain at the wheel. Change the radio station to one you like! Take the wheel! Fight for control of the truck—the dream—your mind!!!
The Mother Brain sends her thoughts to all of you: Blah, blah, blah… I’m invincible! Q. What video game brain claimed to be invincible?
The Mother Brain has no trouble exploiting Randy’s weakness. She takes great pleasure in this mind! You are a man of many vices? Let me get you in touch with your feminine side! But the brain learns the hard way that Randy’s made a living off of exploitation. He takes advantage of the beast’s unprotected underbelly! Badia gets out from under what may be an illusion or may be real! She sees the glass dome and correctly assumes it will not shatter easily—but the cannon’s beam is nearly as powerful as the titan’s beam was—it warps the dome concave! The dome is pressing against the brain and beginning to crack! Emi wills Naja’s form to morph into a scorpion shape. Her pinchers get a crushing grip on the brain. XIII feels her thoughts. I agree, Emi. Randy has struck where armor does not cover. Badia found a weapon that weakens the protective dome. The brain exploits your weakness—you do the same to her! The Mother Brain sends her thoughts to all of you: So you found my one and only flaw. Lightning does not strike twice! I’m invincible! The Mother Brain bends her copper hull inward by sheer will. No stone lance can penetrate her again! Her tentacles strike the ground—cracks form—the two remaining cannons are swallowed into the earth! (For someone who has only one flaw, she seems to be protecting herself against two of them!)
8+ (Badia: 6+):
BAMB failed to find your weak spot. 2 to 7 (Badia: 2 to 5):
Weakness exploited; lose ♥️♥️♥️♥️! Exactly 1:
Weakness exploited; lose ♥️♥️♥️♥️ and your attack is weaker!
There is a rumble under the ground. A lid to the sewers bursts into the sky. And you all hear a woman’s baritone eloquently speaking your preferred language: The most powerful minds of your kind have weaknesses that are easily exploited. You are not intellectuals, yet you have spirit. Spirit I shall take pleasure in crushing. Cobblestones crumble. A figure rises to the height of Naja’s sand-goddess form—it is worming tendrils, bulbous fungi and periscopic eyes large as a whale’s! They are under a glass dome and copper hull. Spidery tendrils allow the creature to move quickly, but fleeing would do you no good…
7+:
Mother failed to exploit your weakness. Beat its brains! 2 to 6:
Mother discovered a weakness of yours. Lose ♥️♥️♥️♥️, then hit back! Exactly 1:
Mother discovered a weakness of yours. Lose ♥️♥️♥️♥️ AND your attack is weaker! But you can still hit back, and I suggest you do!
Our heroes continue their relentless attack! Every strike hits, and it looks like the gigantic monster's form will break apart from the beating! Beet-purple blood oozes from the armpits—one of which screams in agony as its tentacles try to finish off the pesky gnome! Captain Andoran gets in the way—
The left tentacles try to sweep Henrietta's mount out from under her!
The eagles tear at the froghemoth's head! The monster bites back!
Two shrieks echo deep within the monster's giant skull. Its eyes glow purple ands sink into its body—and the monster doubles over and vomits into the sea!
Our heroes notice something in the vomit—the shape of a person, and feathery wings—even though neither the Edge nor the bird was swallowed! As bubbles rise from the tainted water, the froghemoth turns to face our heroes on the dock. A third eye emerges from its gaping maw—on the tip of the monster's tongue, like a fleshy periscope! The flesh on the creature's body pulsates and oozes purple blood. Screams are heard within the beast, but not its dumbly slack-jawed mouth...
Our heroes bravely face the monstrosity! The captain's attack hits thick hide, but thanks to Anabel's shocking dance moves, the froghemoth's skin becomes more sensitive. Lightning dances all over the monster's body—and he becomes slower! He only unleashes a single attack—
—and he clobbers the poor little gnome! But the tentacles are writhing too much from the lightning to attempt a grab, and the left tentacles make no attack at all. The froghemoth licks his lips, and glares at the Vigilante heroine who managed to slip away. Cal's checks:
Electricity is the weakness. It slows the monster considerably.
The net will not hold the creature. He'll tear it easily. While the magic of demon seeds is beyond Cal's understanding, he does sense that this monster's body is unstable. Perhaps the form grew too quickly, and it can be undone as quickly. (?) In any case, the frog's body has tumor-like lumps that expand and deflate like bubbles in gravy that is heated almost to a boil. This is not normal, even for an 'aberration' ...which might be the best word to describe it, based on the choices on Hunter's parchment.
Boards fly! The Prince emerges as a creature with four tentacles, a body that could envelop an elephant, and a mouth big enough to accommodate a party of four (each with a gnome as their +1 guest)— This thing that some might describe as a "froghemoth" tears through the ship like it's built of cardboard and toothpicks! Anabel bravely dashes into melee reach even as floorboards are crushed into the harbor floor.
Legs thick as oak trunks stomp through the broken ship. The impossibly large "Prince" mindlessly attacks anyone within twenty feet!
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