Ah sorry, I stopped checking in here a while ago. I loved playing with all of you, and I'm happy that some of you are in other games of mine.
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Aww that sounds awful. Tell her to get better soon!
Medge keeps running through the compound towards some lizards that just climbed off a tower. She unleashes her genius plot; casting Sleep on the pair. In her mind what's she's doing is singing them a magical lullaby. In reality she's yelling "GO TO SLEEP DUMB LIZARDS" in a singsong voice.
I'm sorry to hear that Gurp. That's hard to deal with :(
Hi all, I just wanted to poke my head in and say hi. I haven't been around for a while because I had a family member in the hospital; I told PlotBunny but I should have said something here too. Said family remember is out of the hospital and doing good so i'll be back posting this weekend.
Medge rushes out from behind the tree and attempts to climb over the wall.
She makes it over, step one in her plan to sneak up behind the lizards threatening Twitchy....only they've turned kind of crispy....
Medge follows after Twitchy. She whispers "We gets in, rescues loots, get it safe and then maybe think about other lizard stuffs. Pretty shiny- And then Ronk fails utterly at stealth."Run! We hide and jump lizards who come to bonk Ronk! Medge going to look for hiding place!"
Medge is hiding behind a small tree. Her ears are clearly sticking out to each side.
Medge gasps "Oh, Medge sees way through! We go through holes in fence"
Yikes! Stay safe!
Medge searches her wealth of random knowledge for anything like those standing stones.
Are we keeping our Twitchy for now?
If you need to take a break then you need to take a break. It's all good :) There's lots of options for where Twitchy's going. Back to watch the boat, a long range mission, being kidnapped by lizards etc. I'm putting my foot down and saying she will be coming back at some point ;) I do have one thought. Would you be interested in playing a different, temporary character? Somebody who either leaves or dies when Twitchy comes back? Like, maybe a shadowscale or some other random swamp dweller?
"New stuff! Queen Lizards are best lizards" Medge happily stows as much of the new stuff as she can
Medge pokes Ronk "No sulking! Pirates don't sulk! Ronk gets new job; surprise attacking! We sneak into camp and if lizard gets in our way we hit them very hard so no noise. See, Ronk still have important job!"
I've got +5 to Swim. Could we make some kind of cobbled together raft? I've got +3 to Sailor, it could work
Medge needs her First Mate! A good leader knows she needs good advisers ;) Medge's number one goal is Get Shinnies Back. After that is becoming a better leader. That way they have their own group of lizard minions heehee
Medge looks from Grup, to the lizard, to Mort and back to Gurp again. She slowly backs away from the trio; there's no way she's getting caught in whatever's about to happen. "You follow Queen Mother gob? She is now friend of Dread Pirate Goblins. See, she give Medge this!" Medge pulls out her new amulet and shows it to the lizards. "She say you know this means we friends, and also that maybe you no provoke Gurp into giving swamp curses."
I'm so sorry to hear that PlotBunny. :( Don't worry about us, we're good at keeping ourselves entertained. Just focus on yourself and your family.
Mean Medge kicks Ronk. Ronk should bite her. Then Medge would learn to respect Ronk. I cackled at this. I don't think Ronk would get the result he wants ;)
Medge bounds along after Twitchy, death and destruction on her mind. Everything is going to burn to the ground except her loot. All of the lizard's things are now her loot. All of them. Everything for her and her fellow Pirates.
"Medge thinks it's this way! Or maybe this way! WHERE ARE LIZARDS?"
Medge curls up with Bandana and Mr. Shell before she falls asleep. She needs her rest if she's going to kill all the lizards ever tomorrow.
"Stuff....gone? Loot...but....but." It's the statement that breaks Medge's brain. "Medge takes loot, not loosseses it..." As she stands there in shock, she realizes Ronk is hitting her boat. She lets out a loud, primal shriek and jumps on his back "DON'T HIT THE BOAT! DON'T ATTACK THE BOAT DUMB-DUMB!" Medge is flailing away, alternating between trying to get him in a headlock, punching him in the kidneys and stomping on his foot.
It's not going like I want. I'll write up a flex time dream for Medge later when I'm not slowing us down.
You guys should have heard the noise I made when I read that the lizards stole the loot. Medge's head is going to explode. I'm working on a proper post worthy of the event :3
Medge is half asleep on her feet. "Need boat. Boat. Get to boat."
Honestly, I'm glad you botted me. I feel bad because I meant to keep up with my games on my phone and I failed miserably at that. :(
Aaaaand I'm back, whee! And in true goblin spirit, I'm going to throw a wrench into the works. I thought Medge knew the proper way to cleanse the haunt from the knowledge check she passed on the 1st. If I'm wrong then she is absolutely lying so they'll go back to the boat, that part is spot on, but if she knows how to do it she'll want to get it done so she doesn't have to bother with this place again.
I just wanted to let you all know that I'm having computer issues so I'm stuck posting from my phone. Please bot me as necessary.
Medge yells back ”Medge TOLD YOU that haunt do not move! Is stuck in one place! But you no listen to Medge, and you charge in it steals some of your mojo! Stupid thing couldn’t have followed us, is stuck in one place! If you want to help and protect fellow Dread Pirates you need to listen to fellow Dread Pirates and trust Pirates who say they know what up!” She walks up to Ronk and pokes him, hard. ”Medge not jump in to steal glory. Medge already has all the glory ever. Medge went to stab shadow to keep you and Mort Pet-Friend from being all shadow eaten. Don’t be mad that fellow pirate came to help, otherwise maybe next time nobody want to help Ronk.” Medge stomps over to Mort and looks him up and down. ”Ok, so. Number the one, can claws become magic? We need to look this up. Number the two, to make haunt go away forever. So, something make this area have haunt. If people died, we bury bones. If something nasty happen here, burn down place where nasty-nesses happen. Need to find place that cause this. We go look while Twitchy and Ronk yell at each other. You come look too Gurp?” Oh, and number the three, will Zeli bird come back soon? We need to go search for Zeli bird?”
This is the chick that made that. I hope she makes more stuff :)
"Eh, we call him big dumbdumb later! Give stern but loving but also soul crushing talk later!" Stabbing a shadow seems pretty silly, but Medge does it anyways
Medge pulls out her magical horse-stabbing dagger and jumps into the fray. "Still think this is dumb idea!"
Ah, cool, stabbing time!
I...wait. The Gorge of Gluttons is really a Horse Bane dogslicer. Does it count as magic for non-horse enemies?
I know money is tight for some of us, so I'm going to preface this by saying I'm not expecting donations. This is just something that's really important for me to share. 15 years ago today my Mom passed away from complications arising from Mitochondrial Myopathy. It is, plainly speaking, a nightmare for the sufferer and their loved ones. In honor of my Mom I’ve been going around today just trying to spread awareness about this disorder. I’ve also been linking to United Mitochondrial Disease Foundation. Again, I’m not trying to guilt anyone in donations ;) I just want to spread awareness and understanding.
"This area, bad stuff happen here so it turns into Haunt. Dumb thing can't move, so can always come back! It not going anywhere so we come back with full mojo and magic and stuff!"
"Monster is inca....incan...incorporeal. Only hurt by magic stuff! Magic weapons, magic spells...is bombs magic? Medge doesn't know!"
"Not talking to you, duh!" Medge shouts back
"Oohh. This is a Haunt. Repeats voices of the dead- Hey, where you going?" Medge calls as Zeli and Mort take off in opposite directions. "You can't see! Oh, Medge has an idea" Four balls of light shoot from Medge's hands to hover over Mort
Do I get to roll with Medge's bardic knowledge?
PlotBunny, how do you want me to roll for Medge's bardic knowledge? Is there a specific Knowledge you want me to roll for, or do I pick ones I think it could be and roll them all?
Gurp will always be able to throw around swamp curses.
You can take it if you'd like, but thinking on it I should adjust Medge's skills so she has it. It's going to be interesting to see how she handles it but she's a proper Admiral now and she knows she needs to make nice with the Queen.
Ah, the one time Medge is being reasonable and everybody's going to override her. I guess she'll learn her lesson ;) Ready to go whenever!
”Ok, so, you teach them the reading, Medge teaches you the numbers. Medge knows all about numbers, that’s how you know how much loot you have! Very simple cost analysis shows how Queen gets more value in the long run by having us occupy boat lands. But that’s for later! For now...Queen wants treasure from boat? Can work out deal. Lots of Vorka’s junk left. Why Vorka take your husband fan? Is special fan?”
If Bluff fails: Medge knows about the fan. Something about you wanting it is making her cautious
Medge has been dancing around singing "Medge has a shiny, Medge has a new shiny!" since the Queen put the amulet around her neck. She finally realizes that something else is going on. "Wait, what we doing?"
Nah, Medge's good at offended people. Thinking about the consequences of her actions just isn't her style ;)
”Medge draws herself up to her full height [b]"Medge. Is. Not. Stupid. Number the one, you know how far we can see from ship? Not far! Swamp is full of trees! Can’t see far in any direction here! Besides you say ship is on border not in border.” ”Number the two, Vorka your sister, you know she eats gobs and you let her live in boat and capture and eat Lick-toad gobs. Could tie up and keep somewhere safe but didn’t. And we not Lick-toads no more but we was, and Vorka could have eaten us, ate gobs we knew and family and stuff. That was threatening and hostile to us but we not getting all mad.” ”Number the three...this one Medge actually confused on. Lizards we capture say they from Underbelly tribe but you not Underbelly. But you say you sent lizards, but then why they lie to us about name of tribe but also send us this way? You fighting with Underbellies? Why Underbellies going to see Vorka? Ok, don’t know stuff, but only important because it leads to number the four“ Medge continues ”You say boat at place where all territories meet. So lots of it not your land anyways. Instead of Vorka who eats your lizards you have us who wants to be your friends. And, we already told you we going to toss out Lick-toads which gets you heaps more land anyways. Plus you know we don’t like Underbellies if they big fat boat touching liar pants, and that all works for you. We are awesome and useful and losing small bit of land in exchange for us puts you waaaaay ahead on your loot count. Medge knows about loot and economics and stuff!”
Medge shrugs ”She wants lizards, she can have lizards. They LIED, and while they should be stabbed many times, then we have to clean up mess. Instead, make them present to Gob Queen Lady. Good present, right?” Medge looks curiously at the Queen ”You gonna eat their hearts and gain their strength? Small lizards but still good maybe. Now. About Dread Pirate land. The boat, that is MEDGE’s boat. Medge’s boat is Dread Pirate Goblin’s boat, but is also Medge’s boat. Anything we see from boat is ours too. Easy peasy right? Maybe Lick-toads is ours too. Don’t really want to keep, just burn down a few things, take some loot. Kick old chief in rear, ha! Don’t know bird cruncher, don’t like underbelly for LYING TO MEDGE. What you want us to do with them?”
Medge stops stabbing the air with her daggers and just freezes. A confused look spreads across her face. ”Mort Pet-Friend’ she says in what she thinks is a whisper but is really just as loud as her normal voice. ”Zeli bird didn’t say my name? Ohh...just titles. But, why they think we are same person? Because…..because…..they’ve seen goblin-cats before?!?” she gasps. Queen, you have goblin cats? Medge really wants to see goblin-cats, sounds cool! We give you your lizard guys back, and then you show us goblin-cats and we are all good friends” Medge nods to herself, now thoroughly convinced that the matter’s all settled. She glances back at Gurp. ”Sorry, we get you other hearts to eat. Better ones!”
Gurp now has his goals (protect the swamp and pass on his genes) Now, I'm not saying Gurp should look at the beautiful Queen Mother, fall in love and break into a romantic Gurp-type song to woo her. Nope. That is definitely not what I'm thinking.... Mort, thank you for rolling a 20. Medge needs all the help that she can get!
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