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To the Most Honourable and Noble Lady Heidmarch,
No doubt you are pleased to hear from one of your most competent agents. I will spare you of the most extreme suspense: the mission I led to the Sanos Forest was an immense success. Not only did I single-handedly end the supply drought at Miss Dinnelletter's camp, but I believe I have found a most worthy ally in our struggle against the Aspis Consortium in your fair city of Magnimar. To create a new Oppara in a land of vagrants and pedlars is no easy task, so I know you will be elated to hear my tale.
As all epics do, this story begins with a simple task. You set our merry troop to deliver most crucial supplies to the druid, and I can say without hesitation that I performed impeccably in this regard. We arrived just in time to save the tiny researcher from an undead horde. Of course, it should come as no surprise to you that I dealt the finishing blow to the dread beasts. Imagine our shock to hear that our task had only just begun: there had been a kidnapping — an abduction! — in the quaint forest of Sanos. Still your beating heart my Lady, for we rescued the flame-haired damselette without delay. Yet I am getting ahead of myself, and I am sure you would like to hear the climax before the denouement.
Upon our egress from the cottage, I led our fearless band into the woods. We came upon many great dangers which were handily dispatched by force or by wit; the one that stands out most was an encounter with a great dragon, who like a beautiful Taldan Countess, was swayed by my words both poetic and fierce.
"Join us in our cause against the undead plaguing your wood, lest our anger turns to you as well", thundered I; like a repentant child, the forest drake Riddywipple joined our cause. No mere brute beast was this, however, for he showed me a great many allies of his own, including a mighty stone giant! It was regrettable that the behemoth was unable to walk in the deep of the forest due to the thick underbrush, but Riddywipple assured me that his cohort would gladly join your cause in Magnimar. I expect the giant to arrive within the week to begin a crusade against the Consortium. Like the Ulfan Guard against Dawnflower rabble, the monstrous man should exterminate their presence from your city in a most efficient manner.
I will allow, modest as I am, that the assistants you sent with me on my quest were helpful in the purge of the Sanos forest. The brutish among them were quick to follow directions and swing their great weapons about. The necromancer that was birthing the undead abominations was killed outright, and you have already been assured of the safety of little Dijjit. Some prayers are necessary for the hunting companion of one of my number. The bird was ravaged by a reanimated owlbear; the anger at such a loss of innocent life is of course what fuelled my titanic assault against it which destroyed it for good. The winged creature's sacrifice was not in vain — you may be assured of that!
Unfortunately, I must report with regret that the rabble you sent to learn from the elder druid are not quite up to the task of being a hero like myself. The four still at the cottage were a quiet and frightened bunch, and the Narcisco boy in particularly struck me as, and I hope you will excuse my language, a bit of a prat. None of them would even pick up weapons to defend themselves, much less to rescue their companion from undead horror! To make matters worse, they were also quite rude. The one we rescued from the necromancer was scarcely better, for she spent most of our trip back unconscious, and I was forced to order one of our number to carry her. I would not recommend any of them for active duty, although perhaps your lodge has need of gardeners or cleaning staff.
We both know that you enjoy reading my words dear Lady, but like all good things, this short missive must come to a close. I will end by postulating again on the possibility of employing stone giant Pathfinders. Surely they will make excellent shock troops in our future struggles against this newly emerged Cult of Lissala. Do not be surprised at my readily aiding you in your hour of need, for I remain your shining lighthouse in this desert of Varisia. I will be a beacon for your eyes to see when fiends blind you. I will fight in this arena of life until the curtain falls.
Faithfully Yours,
Manfred Magnus
Pathfinder Extraordinaire