Glop Stinktoe's page

Words! Letters! Spelling!
It's da moste'st beatuifull'est ting I'z ever saw.
I'm going to start learn'n letters now.
Whatz da worst dat can happn'?

-Scribbleface

Ohhh. You'sa mak'a a poopkin look like me'sa. Yeaaa. I gona mak'a one dat lookz like you'z too. Heee Heee.
But no put nasty words on it. Words bad. Fire good.

anyone know what happened to Toothless Dragon?

I'm sure we all wish that Toothless Dragon is safe and healthy.

As an option; I could start a new thread and GM from the point we left off. My wife would take over the role of Glop Stinktoe, so there would be no need to recruit or restructure.

What 'ya gobblers think?

Keep in mind, I've been a looooog time GM. Mostly D&D. However;
a) never in a PBP and
b) never for PF

I dont think those shortcomings would effect a wacky goblin adventure. Might even enhance it. Who knows.

Thoughts?

okay. We do dat. Grimlek talk goods.
glop scratches his head, picking off a flake. Sniffs it. Licks it. Looks around. Looks around more.

what? Did we do it? Wait. What?
Were dat voice in my head dat tell me what to do? I'm supposed to be doing somethink.
scratches butt. Sniffs finger. Licks it.

oh wells. Voices always comes back. Me wait.

Glop starts feeling itches in more sensitive areas. . .

yells into darkness
Hello Hello Hello hello . . .

Thud eventually loses track of his im-goblin-ation and shoves the fish and snake down his gullet. He grabs a dog skull of cider and slurps it with gusto as he watches the fire. Suddenly he feels the need for more fireworks. "Thud want more big BOOMS! Where are big BOOMS?! wait, we get big BOOMS, yes?"

Wachs Thud upside head

Glop finds the others and tells how he twisted Slorb's bones and bashed his brains to get knows of stuff about quest. He tell other's Slorb's words so he not forget himself later. Then finding the strongest drink and saltiest pungent foods he cleanses sweet sappy taste of Slorb talk from his mouth. Makes a Trip to the barfing stump to regurgitate on the chance he swallowed any unspoken Slorb words left in his mouth, them eats again keeping it down this time. Next he strips naked, throwing his cloths into the bonfire and dances with the flames licking his skin to burn off any lingering Slorb smell left on him. Glob starts eyeing the gathered villagers for a more desirable smell to rub against his skin tonight . . . Heh heh heh. He has his fifteen minutes of fame to cash in after all. Nudge nudge, wink wink.

"Oh, and maybe Vorka out there someplace too. You 'member Vorka, right Glop?"

Glop tries very hard to keep a straight face. He looks around to make sure no other goblins hear him kissing arse to weasley Slorb.

Slorb greatest teller of tales ever! Glob never be so goodly. You tell Glob again, them Glob sing tales of Slorb's greatest knows of stuff about Vorka!

Glob represses the bile pushed up by these words. Wonders if Slorb would even taste good, or just be a saggy bunch of yuck yuck meat that never cooks goodly.

Glop is going to try and get a private word in with Slorb at some point, if possible. First he's going to try and make him friendly with flattery, then get info by goosing his ego. It would go something like this . . .
Slorb big heap importaint goblin to hear so many chiefs words. Me head hurts just from those few. Yousa too goodz to leave village with no Slorb here. It takez four other goblers just to do work of one Slorb . . . I imaging this could go on a long tme, as Glop could listen for hours as someone praised him. He'll even sing songs of heroic Slorb tales if necessary.

Then; how would the mighty Slorb deal goblin rath on the Lotslegs, and what secrets of the Brinestump Marsh only revile themselvs to powerful Slorb's keen senses? . . .

Glop finishes with; . . .all songs will be sung telling how the mighty Slorb allowed the four inferior goblins to get broomsticks only because of his great knows of stuff he told them. Without Slorb's great knows of stuff there would be no broomsticks boom boom.

That's the plan anyhow. Of course, Glop will have to do a barfing ritual when out of sight of Slorb, to get the sweet taste of those sappy works out of his mouth.

let the wild rumpus BEGIN! hey, i'm out of town this weekend. maybe get a chance to post tomorrow, but likely not until sunday night. autopilot as needed.

Loot the body! I called it first :-D

Have a great weekend Thud.

OOOH! FUN! food? FIRE! food? BOOMS! food?
Glop good go getter gobbler, gotcha goodly great Gutwad
food?

[QUOTE=

'Thud THUD"] "Ahh, Moo plus Poot is MOOT and we at Chief's MOOT! Glop saying Chief smell like MOOT?!" Thud barely disguises a wide gobliny grin.

YOU sayz Chief smelz like MOOT POOP. Not Glop.

OOH-OHH. Ooh. I gotz it, Thud. I know what MOOT iz! Really thiz time!
It's POOT only with Moo instead of Poo!
Yea! Goblins make POOT cowz make MOOT.

Mmmm. Moot iz made o' Cow. Cow iz made o' Beef. Beef is made o' steak.
Eat now?

Slorb's voice is really annoying, by the way.
me tink dat, or sayz it out loud. Hmm. No matter

Glop readies himself to bestow slobbering prose before the mighty Gutwad. Seeing the dower look in the Chief's eye's, and the occasional pickled Goblin parts mixed among the puppies, he reconsiders. Instead he points to the decaying turkey hat on Slorb and gives him a sarcastic thumbs up before sitting restlessly and fidgety on the floor. He exchanges knowing looks with Grimlek at the obvious lack of breakfast.
Chiefs so fat, must be foodz somewherez.
muttering to himself; Stupid Thud. Eberyone kno MOOT meanz "moor oot". What's an oot?

Mesa hopes Cheif whispers Slorb to feedz us alls breakfast. Meat cakes and fatty bacon sounds nummy in me tummy. Mmmmmmmmm.

Where is Chief? Why he take so long? Who he tink he iz anyway, the Chief?

Thud looks interestedly at Glop's hair. "blue...HAIR, " he notes in slight awe and continues inspecting it more closely sniffing and then tasting the blue pompadour. Upon reaching a conclusion, he declares his verdict in disgust. "Glop waste FOOD! Berries in HAIR!"

Turning to Grimlek, Thud asks curiously, "Toothlizard like berries? Glop flavor his HEAD!"

whoo howdy! You post fourth around here and it's under the buss you go. {cracking knuckles over keyboard}. Let's go boys :-)

Glop looks sorrowful. Look closer my fellow Gobs. Here Thud. pointing and here Grimlek pointing. See? SMACK! He banks their heads together so hard it sounds like logs splitting. Now looks here. We aint gotz time to pickle around here. Big Chief wants to seez us.
First Thud, these them berries are ripe. They aint be good eats for 'nother day till they getz a moldy glopey looking stink stuff. And fifth, every buddy knows what is that a tooflizard is. It's MEAT. All lil babs get teached me song. You'ze kno it.
Tunes up armpit trumpet. singing
What's every Goblin, likes to eat. It's
MEAT! MEAT! MEAT!
How's Goblin's eats it with? Are pointy
TEEF TEEF TEEF
Yeaaaaaaaaaa MEAT!
dramatic half turn

. . and you Grimlek. Best keep your Gob gob shutted ups. Else I sing a tale about you and the giant widemouth frog behind old stumpys farm last full moonshine day, night. It was night. NOW. Run home and ask your mum if she ever had any younglings that lived!

Glop crosses his arms over his heaving chest. Satisfied with his performance.

End act one, scene one. Glop's tirate of Doooooooom.

Last is first. First is last. Every Goblin know that. Glop wins! Glop real-real first!

What a purdy day tu be a Goblin! Glop stretches and lets out his might morning breath smelling of last night's stink cabbage surprise. Standing up, he hears a loud pbtpbtpbtpbtpbtpbtpbt and an even denser meaty aroma wafts to his nostrils. Startled, he turns abruptly to see who's behind him. Seeing no one he turns again and continues in circles for several moments freversly sniffing the air. Forgetting what he was looking for, Glop picks over his sprawling collection of berries. Today weza be blue hair Glop. Smashing a few beries in his calloused palm, Glop "glops" them into his hair making a nice greasy blue coif. It'z not eazy being the most highest charisma-mattic gobbler bard iz it Glop. No Glop it isznt I telz meself. Picking open any scabs that might have crusted over in his slumber and opening body zits to the stagnant morning air. Someonez gotz to keep the other gobblers wivez "entertained" while they mates outz doing stuff and stuff. His tiny laugh turns into a thunderous roar whyle he rolls across the floor amused at himself. That's when he notices the timid Goblin youngling standing in his doorway. Chief want you in Moot House. Go now.
And he does.

Here be stats for Glop Stinktoe, the grossest gobblin Bard
they were all made with HeroLabs, it was really not that hard

He's fit to fight, raise a stink and spin a gobblers tale
if you can't stand horrid singing, I suggest bringing lots of ail

Glop and I are kicking around some options now. Bard Goblin PC. Who knew!?
Tomorrow I'm out most of the day, so if not tonight, then Monday I'll have full stats and flavor for a look'see.
Starting Tuesday sounds great to me. We can never start too soon!

Iron-Dice, aka Glop

Welcome one and all

Well, I just hope we can craft a game with as much fun, energy, and hilarity as the recruiting thread, yes?

Yes!

20 pt buyin! We be heroic indeed!

I'll start working on goblin prose for every occasion. My wife will love that :-)

whoo hoo! Glob get to put life on line for the king. And um. . .take a test.
what?

cant wait. Great fun so far!