"Got a copper t' spare, friend? Times is hard, they is, and I just wants to get enough to buy some hot soup before I 'eads off. Sorry if the smell offends, but I 'aven't quite been able to affords a bath in awhile. There's a pool near the river I sometimes bathes in, but it's been proper cold to do that of late.
"Oh, bless ye, friend, that should be just enough for some soup. If'n I tells you a story, would you spare enough for some bread to goes with it? Alright, 'ows about a tale of forbidden romance, between an elven diplomat and a 'uman bandit? There was this elf, see, from Kyonin o' course, and 'e 'ad several wagons o' silk travelling through contested lands. They was jumped by brigands, an' they was the proper sort o' ruffian - fought to subdue rather than kill, but made off with the choice goods as quick as you like.
"Well, this made the elf madder than a chicken trying to squeeze out a square egg, so's he wents back to Kyonin, found hisself some elfin warriors, and went back to that forest with a fury. Went to go find him these brigands what stole his stuff, he did, and as skillful as the bandits were in the woods, elfs is always better. Found 'em right quick, an' demands that the leader return his goods an' remit hisself to elf justice. The bandit leader approaches, an' removes 'er 'elm, and 'er long, flaxen locks flow out. She refuses to return the goods, sayin' 'er people needs it more than the elfs do.
"Well, somethin' 'appens to the elf, it does. 'E says 'e doesn't need the goods no more, but instead wants the bandit queen to return something else. And that be 'is 'eart, which she just stole. Well, she rolls 'er eyes at this foolishness, but the elfs go ahead and leave. The diplomat continues sending 'is wagons through the area, and the bandits keep stealing from 'im, recognizing an easy mark when they sees it. But the elf, now 'e's a crafty one. 'E's been getting to find out about the bandit queen, and he's been leaving items that would attract her attention in his caravan. Eventually, 'e goes back to 'er, and professes 'is love for 'er.
"One thing leads to another, an' soon the bandit queen's got an elf bastard in 'er. Well, time passes, an 'er elf lover moves on - elfs an' their flights of fancy, don't you know. The child gets born, an' she raises 'im best she can. Then some lawmen get tired of the bandits, an' drive them all off. The lad's mother dies. Just the way o' the world, it is.
"So 'e wanders. Travels wherever 'e can, not spending much time in one place or another. Begs for what scraps honest folk can give 'im. All 'e's got is 'is gift for story-tellin', an' what bits of copper that can get 'im. It's an 'ard life 'e's got, but it's the life 'e was dealt.
"Thanks for the coppers, friend! Might even have enough for a mug o' cider with my bread and soup now. Blessings to you an' yours!"
