Chairborne Ranger's page

I got this idea from the Running Gags thread, but some great lines don't quite make great running jokes. We've had some good ones recently, all in the Shackled City AP:

1. In SCAP, Module 2, vs Tongueeater. The fighter is getting wasted, and the cleric wants to try and talk the monster down. In homage to Pulp Fiction, the fighter says to the cleric, "Pretty please, with sugar on top, kill the $@#*ing monster."

2. Same encounter. The rogue is circling behind Tongueeater for a better shot. The fighter encourages the rogue to move in and flank Tongueeater. The rogue replies, "The hell with you, that thing could kill me!"

3. SCAP, Module 2, the ruins. The fighter seizes an opportunity for a cleave attempt in a hallway. His first mark is a thug brought down to about 1/2 HP by the cleric in a previous round. The cleric complains, "Hey, I want to kill that guy." The fighter responds, "Do I try to upstage you when you're healing?"

I can't think of any others right off the bat. Anyone else have any really memorable zingers that haven't quite appeared over and over again but are part of your table lore nonetheless?

These are the notes for my company's charter hearing:

The Board of Charters

This seven-member panel is responsible for the issuance of Cauldron Free Company Charters. Its membership is drawn from regional nobility, clergy, and local leadership, as well as an Imperial representative. A party must be approved of by four of the panel’s seven members in order to become a chartered company. Of course, each of these board members has his own agenda.

The Churches-
This quarter, the Priesthood of the Triumvirate and the Cult of Mammon represent Cauldron’s faiths on the board.
· Jenya Urikas- Jenya must abstain from voting in this case due to her personal relationship with the PC’s. She acts as an advocate before the board, essentially adding a +2 aid another bonus to all the party’s Diplomacy checks, unless she is called upon to make one herself (but see below).
· Ike Iverson- In a blatant snub, Embryl Aloustinai has sent her lieutenant, Iverson, to represent her in the council. The Cult of Mammon and the Church of the Triumvirate are theological rivals, and a personal dislike has blossomed between Sarcem Delasharn and Embryl. This mutual loathing has infected the lower priests of both churches, and so anything that Jenya favors, Iverson is predisposed to oppose. His starting attitude is unfriendly, and any time the PC’s make use of Jenya’s aid another bonus, they suffer a –2 penalty on their check to influence Iverson.

The City-
· Severen Narvalant- The City’s Lord Mayor, Severen has enjoyed the good publicity afforded by the party’s rescue of the kidnap victims. He has been seeking an opportunity to appear publicly as their patron for the past week, and to distance himself from his own government’s failure to find the victims. His starting attitude is friendly.
· Terseon Skellerang- Captain of the Town Watch, Skellerang’s force was made to look incompetent when an unchartered, unlicensed band of freelancers solved a two-month-old mystery in three days. Skellerang’s starting attitude is unfriendly.

The Imperium-
· Aetius Calgary- Aetius represents the Ran Imperium in the city. His area of responsibility is quite broad, and his office is quite small. He has bonded hundreds of adventuring companies, most of which have gone on to meet untimely ends. He is bored and impatient with the whole ordeal and figures he has better things to do. His starting attitude is indifferent.

The Nobility-
The noble members of the board also rotate quarterly. This month, two of Cauldron’s most influential nobles sit on the board.
· Ankhin Taskerhill- Taskerhill is one of the city’s wealthiest nobles, with a seat on the advisory council, a stranglehold on the lucrative obsidian trade, and title to many of the city’s businesses. He is a rival of Zachary Aslaxin I and of Maavu Ardlintal. His own daughter, Annah Taskerhill, leads a free company known as the Stormblades. His starting attitude is indifferent.
· Orbius Vhalantru- Vhalantru is an enigma in the city, and it is suspected that his place on this council is due in large part to his cozy relationship with the Lord Mayor, since he owns no land or business in Cauldron proper. Nevertheless, he has been caught up in the popular esteem for the party, and is very knowledgeable about their exploits. His starting attitude is friendly.

Mechanics-
For the company to be officially licensed, four of the board’s six voting members must vote for the PC’s.
· Hostile- An NPC with a hostile attitude will table further discussion and call for a vote when he senses there are enough votes to reject the party’s bid. Such a vote ends the encounter in failure. For each hostile board member, the PC’s suffer a cumulative –2 penalty on Diplomacy checks due to the negative “vibe” coming from the offended board member.
· Unfriendly- An unfriendly NPC will vote against chartering the PCs if a vote is called, but will not seek to end the hearing, giving the party time to influence attitudes.
· Indifferent- An indifferent NPC will abstain from voting should a vote be called, and will do nothing to help or oppose the PC’s efforts.
· Friendly- An NPC with a friendly attitude will vote for the PCs should debate end. He remains unsure about the party, however, and so will not seek to end debate on his own.
· Helpful- A helpful NPC will seek to end debate when enough friendly attitudes have been amassed to guarantee acceptance of the party’s bid. Such a vote ends the encounter with success. For each helpful NPC, the party enjoys a cumulative +2 bonus to Diplomacy checks due to the enthusiasm of the supportive board member.

The task before the party, therefore, is to adjust the attitude of at least one NPC to helpful, and the attitudes of three others to at least friendly. A party who succeeds in winning a charter pays the fee and is bonded as a licensed Free Company, with all the associated privileges. A party who fails may appeal the decision after a 90-day probationary period.

Since other folks seem to be getting good feedback for their ideas here, I thought I'd run one of mine up the flagpole and see if anyone would salute it.

As a DM edit, I've instituted the idea of Adventuring Charters in my campaign-- sort of an adventurer's license, if you will, that allows characters to wield magic items and be capable of casting powerful spells and still walk amongst the normal populace. It also has provided a great way to insert hooks-- all chartered companies are registered with state government, so folks in need of special talents can contract them-- and to introduce NPC's (my players met Orbius Vhalantru for the "first" time at their charter hearing).

To give the party a more direct stake in the events surrounding Zenith Trajectory and The Demonskar Legacy, I was thinking about having good old Lord V cook up a plot to tax adventurers not affiliated with him and get Skellerang to pass it. My only problem now is, how does one tax adventuring booty? Where do oyu get it assessed? I'm thinking a fairly low tax rate (5-10%) will be enough to piss my PC's off, but the logistics are boggling my mind. Should I abandon this altogether, or is their an easy way?