Allan Jones's page

Finally, after what seems an eternity (especially to impatient goblins), a high-pitched nasally voice calls out from inside the Moot House, "You gobs, enter now!"

As the four chosen ones trickle in to the Chief's dwelling, they can't help but notice all of the trophies scattered about the room...the Moot House is a veritable museum of Licktoad heroics! The place is crammed full of stolen weapons, shiny bits of treasure, and the brine-pickled bodies of several brutally-slaughtered small furry animals (puppies mostly).

In spite of all these splendors, the dominant sight in the room is His Mighty Girthness Chief Rendwattle Gutwad himself, looking down upon his subjects from the heights of the Teeter Chair. This 'throne' is a six-foot high ramshackle seat of driftwood and tree branches that creaks precariously under the weight of its obese occupant. The Chief is resplendently naked, his fat hairy belly rolling down over his groin to keep his manhood covered (not that he'd care if anyone saw anyway).

That weasel, Slorb, stands off to the side, pompously dressed, as usual, in his 'offical robez' (actually the cast off pink cotton bathrobe of some human girl), and 'advizer hat' (some feather-covered atrocity that may once have been a turkey). Again, in that whiny voice he orders, "Sit on floor, now! His Mighty Girthness, Chief Rendwattle Gutwad will speak to you."

Reactions from you, before the Chief begins?

Great Chief Rendwattle Gutwad finally bellows, "Dat's enuff, boys!!!" The chief waits for a moment for the ruckus to die down. Sensing that it's not going to happen anytime soon, he sighs and produces a ridiculously large warclub from behind his throne, then proceeds to wade into the throung, bashing open a few heads. "Quiet youz. And youz." At last, the message sinks in, and the commotion subsides to a dull roar.

The chief stamps his club four times on the ground (breaking the foot of one unfortunate nearby gob), and points a huge sausagelike finger at four would-be goblin heroes in turn.

"Glop Stinktoe!"

"Grimlek Longtrunk!"

"Thok Burnskin!"

"Thud!"

He continues ominously, "Youz my guyz to go forth for all Licktoads and get boomstickz...if youz can pazz da test, dat iz..."

Duh duh duh!!!! To be continued in the IC thread, coming soon to a messageboard near you.

Seriously, though, after some long and hard deliberation, based on party balance and general entertainment value, I picked those four. This was a blast, and I commend all of you for your contributions to this super-fun recruiting thread! Please know that it was a tough choice. I wish you all the best.

Watch this space for a link to the Discussion thread, coming shortly. Thanks guys.