Thanks for going through that so systematically and thoroughly KSF.

My tentative pre-apology was offered free of sarcasm. Just so you know.

Trekkie90909 wrote:

Groups of persons are those with faces, that you sit down with and discuss the relevant issues with.

That assumes that sitting down and discussing relevant issues is an option that we are always offered. And that doing so, when you have the opportunity to do so, will produce results.

In reality this opportunity is not always offered to you, for many reasons. Here, it always is.

Given that this discussion arose from people talking about running into stuff and dealing with stuff in their lives and not on these boards, I'm not sure that's entirely relevant to what I'm saying, and to what some others are saying here.

It is a personal ideal, one I wish more people shared. Can't accomplish an ideal you don't hold,

It came across in your original post as a prescription, a bit of a "You're doing it wrong" sort of statement.

and compromise isn't a good basis for personal identity.

Compromise is sometimes necessary for survival, self care, and co-existence.

Moving on to your other points, frustration is not the same as hate. Expressing frustration is not the same as expressing hate.

And while I know it stings sometimes, when you hear someone in a minority group express frustration with a majority group that you yourself are a part of, if you do not participate in the sorts of things they are talking about, they are not talking about you. People slip between literal and figurative language all the time. Basic fact of human discourse.

You can also assume that they already know people in that group who do not participate in that behavior, and do not need those exceptions pointed out to them. The "not all" is understood.

And while I know it stings, sometimes they are talking about you. Accurately. In which case you have an opportunity for self-reflection and self-improvement.

On being miserable and alone, you seem to be offering general advice, not just to posters here, but ideals to live by. If that's the case, you are indeed making an inaccurate assumption about this. Further, you offer it in a way that seems to say that those who are miserable and alone have themselves to blame, with your If-Then statement.

And telling someone who is miserable or alone that they are to blame for it, and that things may be that way forever? Particularly when offered as an initial response? Not helpful. Quite the opposite.

More generally, I would refer you to littlediegito's post above on this overall topic. He lays it all out pretty clearly.