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2 people marked this as a favorite. |

The recent "power outage" at Paizo is eerily similar to the last Super Bowl...
The biggest game is sports is on... The 49ers are getting the snot beat out of them... when suddenly a "power outage" disrupts the game for over 20 minutes... the power is miraculously restored and the game momentum swings the other way with the Ravens barely able to pull out a win...
I note the following eery similarities:
The first round of Superstar 2014 voting is closed... the judges are picking through the pile of submissions like 49ers panning for gold (pun intended)... all is going well until this post from Sean:
I've encouraged the judges to post their opinions here. Meanwhile, I'm doing some data analysis and will be posting some interesting tidbits in a few minutes. :)
...
And then... nothing... and then more nothing... and then some plausible claim of a "power outage...?"Just a coincidence? I think not!
Why was Sean being so encouraging to the other judges?
Is data analysis some sort of NSA-esque shibboleth?
What exactly were these aforementioned tidbits that Sean was referring to?
And most damning, why the smiley emoticon? I took note that these were the very last characters typed before the entire website went down!
Is this some sort of sick Paizo kill-switch for the internet?
What do we really know about the freaks at Paizo anyway?
Oh, and I think my account is being monitored by Paizo so this may be my last post. If you don't hear from me again, don't say you weren't warned...
Please post your favorite conspiracy theories below...

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Donald Robinson RPG Superstar Season 9 Top 32 , Star Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Dedicated Voter Season 8, Marathon Voter Season 9 |

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I think the person(s) resposible are involved with the sharing of the Personal Favorites and their item has not been seen.
Or the person responsible started this thread to cast suspicion elsewhere....
Why that's preposterous. Really preposterous. So preposterous that I may just have to leave the room...!
Or do you Monsieur LeBlanc (if it really is you) think that by casting suspicion on others, that suspicion will not fall on yourself?!
How can we even know that you are a real person and not some sophisticated AI using a fictional Frenchman as a front? I'm not even sure that it's possible to play Pathfinder in French!
I also find it very interesting that you are belong to an elite cadre of individuals who have been granted the title of Champion Voter two years in a row...!
Why are you on such good terms with Paizo?
The conspiracy thickens...

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Andrew Black RPG Superstar 2008 Top 16 , Marathon Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Marathon Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9 aka MythrilDragon |

Jacob Trier RPG Superstar 2012 Top 16 , Marathon Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Dedicated Voter Season 8 |

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OK... things are definitely kinda freakin' me out now...
There's been a lime green Ford Gremlin with tinted windows parked down the street all afternoon and I'm starting to worry...
I can't make anything out except for what looks like a bunch of Mountain Dew bottles strewn across the dashboard and it's license plate - it reads "CE-RULZ."
I think it's the Paizo hit squad that I've feared would eventually arrive.
I'm going to bunker down and start playing some Kanye West and Miley Cyrus singles from the front porch as in the spell geek ward of protection in an attempt to scare them off.
If that doesn't work, I'll have to pull out the big guns - I'll call the really hot chick next door and ask her to walk out and talk to the 2 guys in the Gremlin as in the spell geek banishment.
If that doesn't work, I'm doomed...

Scott Williams 16 Dedicated Voter Season 7 |

OK... things are definitely kinda freakin' me out now...
There's been a lime green Ford Gremlin with tinted windows parked down the street all afternoon and I'm starting to worry...
I can't make anything out except for what looks like a bunch of Mountain Dew bottles strewn across the dashboard and it's license plate - it reads "CE-RULZ."
I think it's the Paizo hit squad that I've feared would eventually arrive.
I'm going to bunker down and start playing some Kanye West and Miley Cyrus singles from the front porch as in the spell geek ward of protection in an attempt to scare them off.
If that doesn't work, I'll have to pull out the big guns - I'll call the really hot chick next door and ask her to walk out and talk to the 2 guys in the Gremlin as in the spell geek banishment.
If that doesn't work, I'm doomed...
Paizo doesn't lower themselves to mundane hit men, you need to watch for cave raptors. They used to keep them in the basement and feed them interns. They evolved on the steady diet of human flesh and shed tears of thousands of expired PCs until they reached true awareness. Now they hunt those foolish enough to question the Company, just for the thrill of the hunt.
Also, make sure you wear your tin foil hat to keep out the mind control ray. The aliens man, the aliens!
Passes out hat to the needy

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1 person marked this as a favorite. |

Also, make sure you wear your tin foil hat to keep out the mind control ray. The aliens man, the aliens!
Passes out hat to the needy
Do you really think the hat will help?
I thought those things were for the weird paranoid guys on the internet boards who didn't have a life...
Better safe than sorry though...
**takes tin hat and places it on head**
Wow, I feel better already! Kinda pointy though...
Going to check on the guys in Gremlin...

Scott Williams 16 Dedicated Voter Season 7 |

Scott Williams 16 wrote:Also, make sure you wear your tin foil hat to keep out the mind control ray. The aliens man, the aliens!
Passes out hat to the needy
Do you really think the hat will help?
I thought those things were for the weird paranoid guys on the internet boards who didn't have a life...
Better safe than sorry though...
**takes tin hat and places it on head**
Wow, I feel better already! Kinda pointy though...
Going to check on the guys in Gremlin...
NO YOU FOOL!!! DECOYS, MAN, DECOYS Then they get you from the sides man. Didn't you watch the documentary on the outbreak at the island man!?!
Mumbles to self, I have I life, right kitty kat meow meow cat? Yes, yes I do little mumbles incohernt baby talk to cat.

Anthony Adam Marathon Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Marathon Voter Season 8, Dedicated Voter Season 9 |
1 person marked this as a favorite. |

My theory is that there is no consipiracy.
Shutting down the forums doesn't really qualify as secret - the whole competition is rather like the X Factor, which means
"Loss of Forums" is just replicating that pause, you know the one... when the Host says...
"And the next person safe and through to the next round is..."
<forums gone pause>
:P
>.< - omg what a twist that would be... On reveal, they reveal the top 32, one every 10 minutes until all top 32 are revealed. Can you just imagine the pain of waiting then as the number of places goes down one by one? >.<

Kalervo Oikarinen RPG Superstar 2013 Top 16 , Marathon Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Marathon Voter Season 8 |

Anthony Adam Marathon Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Marathon Voter Season 8, Dedicated Voter Season 9 |

Feros Champion Voter Season 6, Champion Voter Season 7, Champion Voter Season 8, Champion Voter Season 9 |

To me, it is obvious. In spite of sacred tradition on this website, I've noticed that no one has mentioned the obvious cause in the thread so far. THIS is the conspiracy. THIS is the cover-up. The only question is WHY? When it is so incredibly obvious who is to blame, why bother avoiding the subject? What is really going on?
We're through the looking glass people.
No one here has blamed Cosmo.

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hey folks........ its me Ziion......
im back safe and sound in my house.........
it turns out those two guys in the gremlin car were really cool and i was just loopy nuts to think that Paizo sent them............
i was just being kooky and paranooid........ they were really great guys and pretty cool too....
they dressed real nice and had a great personality.... both of them i mean............ and really snazzy dressers too........ and pretty cool......... they probably werent too cool in high schooll but you should see them now.......... waaaaay coooooool......
any way, everything is cool here and theres no reason to think anything weird happened at Paizo.....
nope..... nothing weird at all...... couldnt be a more normal company.... and the people there...... wow man they are just great........ in a very normal business kind of way.............
i think we shouldjust stop with this silly thread and just get around to putting those monsters together dont you think??.......
and not post on this baord any more......... at least about the nonevent that happened this weekend............ everything works now doesnt it.....?......
lets just get back to the way things used to be before i ever brought this up.............
oh and ill be going away for a while so dont worry if you dont hear from me for a while........ nothing wrong or anything......... just a bit tired of the boards.......... thats allll...........
most of all im so happy things turned out not to be a big deal at all
:-) this is me being happy
oh an one mor thing..... that rumor about the cabe raptors....... totally untrue...... its just crazy talk and you shouldnt listen too crazy talk like that....
:-) this is me being happy again

Anthony Adam Marathon Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Marathon Voter Season 8, Dedicated Voter Season 9 |

*flick*
*red light*
Look right here and all will become clear.
*flashy thing flashes*
There was no blackout, Service is totally normal and as expected.
You are so happy that you have no doubts about making Top 32.
That is all.
Thank you.

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*flick* *red light* Look right here and all will become clear.
*flashy thing flashes*
There was no blackout, Service is totally normal and as expected.You are so happy that you have no doubts about making Top 32. That is all. Thank you.
:-) this is me being happy again
really it is...... just me here being happy again........

Scott Williams 16 Dedicated Voter Season 7 |

Aw man they got to another one, dude you totally gotta fight it bro!
You took off the hat, man! Put it back on dude, then they can't control your braaaain dude! Quick hurry, you still have time. The orange dude eas right maaaan! Aliens, man, Aliens!
You won't get me! I'm on to you and I'm on the East coast MAn! Your Raptors can't get me here, man!
Puts on second tin foil hat, rocks in chair petting cat with tin foil hat as well.

frank gori RPG Superstar Season 9 Top 32 , Marathon Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Champion Voter Season 8, Marathon Voter Season 9 aka GM_Solspiral |

Anthony Adam Marathon Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Marathon Voter Season 8, Dedicated Voter Season 9 |

It was WotC, they were like, "maybe if we shut down Pathfinder for a day people will actually try D&D Next..."
Now, now! Play nice! :P
After all, if we didn't have competition, we wouldn't be able to measure just how awesome Pathfinder really is.

markofbane |

Clearly James Jacobs' fascination (dare we say obsession?) with Chuthlu hit an apex. His rite that would have brought the elder gods upon us was narrowly averted by a serendipitous combination of increasingly sentient velociraptors, freshly baked cookies and the terrible (but necessary) overturning of Jason's liquor cabinet.

Anthony Adam Marathon Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Marathon Voter Season 8, Dedicated Voter Season 9 |

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hey folks........ its me Ziion......
im back safe and sound in my house.........
it turns out those two guys in the gremlin car were really cool and i was just loopy nuts to think that Paizo sent them............
i was just being kooky and paranooid........ they were really great guys and pretty cool too....
they dressed real nice and had a great personality.... both of them i mean............ and really snazzy dressers too........ and pretty cool......... they probably werent too cool in high schooll but you should see them now.......... waaaaay coooooool......
any way, everything is cool here and theres no reason to think anything weird happened at Paizo.....
nope..... nothing weird at all...... couldnt be a more normal company.... and the people there...... wow man they are just great........ in a very normal business kind of way.............
i think we shouldjust stop with this silly thread and just get around to putting those monsters together dont you think??.......
and not post on this baord any more......... at least about the nonevent that happened this weekend............ everything works now doesnt it.....?......
lets just get back to the way things used to be before i ever brought this up.............
oh and ill be going away for a while so dont worry if you dont hear from me for a while........ nothing wrong or anything......... just a bit tired of the boards.......... thats allll...........
most of all im so happy things turned out not to be a big deal at all
:-) this is me being happy
oh an one mor thing..... that rumor about the cabe raptors....... totally untrue...... its just crazy talk and you shouldnt listen too crazy talk like that....
:-) this is me being happy again
Here's an update:
I am in hiding...
The Kanye West and Miley Cyrus singles didn't work - I think they had a minor globe of geekiness up as a counter spell.
I was forced to send out the hot chick neighbor which did the trick. I could see the two guys (wearing black Journey T-Shirts, I think) visibly shaking as she got closer to the car. Man you should have seen the burning rubber as they set off down the street. HA! Take that Paizo minions!
I think the worst is over now, but I think my account may have been hacked...
I did not write the above post. I know how to spell and never use standard emoticons like :-)
And I know an ellipsis only has 3 dots...
Something is afoot...
Take Scott's advice regarding the tin hat - it works wonders! I'm getting another one just in case...
I will try to post from a secure location as much as I can before tomorrow's Top 32 announcement...
Trust no one...

Anthony Adam Marathon Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Marathon Voter Season 8, Dedicated Voter Season 9 |

I just figured Seattle had commandeered all the region's 'nonessential' power for the noise generators at Centurylink Field.
Nah, wasn't that. Paizo server power during Superstar is not deemed "non-essential", it is quite the opposite! ;)

Anthony Adam Marathon Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Marathon Voter Season 8, Dedicated Voter Season 9 |

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pH unbalanced wrote:I just figured Seattle had commandeered all the region's 'nonessential' power for the noise generators at Centurylink Field.Nah, wasn't that. Paizo server power during Superstar is not deemed "non-essential", it is quite the opposite! ;)
You're not wrong...but I'll let you be the one who explains that to Richard Sherman.

Scott Williams 16 Dedicated Voter Season 7 |

Ohhh!
CR 1-4 - check
Urban - check
Liquor Cabinet Gremlin! *scribble scribble*
Wha wha wha...NoNononon! What kind of...person are you!!! What a horrible, vile, wicked, evil...
Nope, just nope.
Runs off to barricade liqueur cabinet.
More things to fear. Begins to hyperventilate

Papasteve08 Dedicated Voter Season 7, Dedicated Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9 |

Anthony Adam wrote:You're not wrong...but I'll let you be the one who explains that to Richard Sherman.pH unbalanced wrote:I just figured Seattle had commandeered all the region's 'nonessential' power for the noise generators at Centurylink Field.Nah, wasn't that. Paizo server power during Superstar is not deemed "non-essential", it is quite the opposite! ;)
That made me laugh!

Chris Shaeffer RPG Superstar 2013 Top 32, RPG Superstar 2012 Top 16 , Dedicated Voter Season 6, Star Voter Season 7, Star Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9 aka Hodge Podge |

Jeebus, I'd gotten out of Seattle for most of the day to hike on Little Si, and had almost blissfully forgotten about football until the entire city erupted into fevered whooping and illegal fireworks.
I guess it's not as bad as I'm used to. The last time a team won something in Philadelphia people were flipping cars and setting trees on fire.