The poor elves of the North Pole continue to be put out of work by large, heartless corporations whose only desire is to make a profit by encouraging materialism.
Let's stand up to those bastards!!! Fight the power! SAVE THE ELVES!!!!
Everybody knows Santa has a sweatshop going on up there. He hires illegal elves from the South Pole that are taking jobs from the North Pole elves. Disgraceful!
And those accusations that the North Pole elves just don't want to work are lies....
Everybody wanted NAFTA (North American Free Trade Agreement) back in the '90s. How's that free trade workin' for the poor elves north of the Arctic Circle? Now Santa can hire anybody "south of the border" to work for less than minimum wage...
And don't get me started about the nonregulated air travel Santa gets every year. I bet fat ol' Saint Nick never has to worry about airport scanners or the TSA gropers!
Well, technically, the fat guy isn't part of NAFTA, since he's not in the Americas. Makes me wonder if he isn't being pressured somehow....?