So it happened to me...

[Galdor the Great]

Your parents warn you about this when you're growing up. You watch the training videos so you can avoid this situation. You hear about this happening to other people but you don't ever think it can happen to you. Yes, I'm ashamed to admit it...(this is so embarrassing, I have to put my confession in a spoiler)

Spoiler:

I found an earwig in my microwave

The little bastard wasn't just in the microwave, he was in the door of the microwave! I mean, seriously. How do you explain that to your loved ones? I have a theory as to how the little fella ended up there but since it's quite technical, I'll spoilerize it.

Spoiler:

The door thing has some like hook items that connect into some sort of hole part to latch itself unopen. If the little critter walked from the hole part to the other hole part where the latchy thing is and went into the door, well, you know...

So of course, I unplugged the microwave since I didn't want to hurt the cute little guy. I don't know if they have a sufficiently evolved nervous system to feel being boiled from the inside out, but either way, it prolly ain't a happy experience. So I left the microwave unplugged and the door open for the night and when I went to check on it the next morning, there were no critters in the door! Nor in any of the other danger zones of a microwave. It seemed that either I or the earwig had outwitted the other, though I haven't quite figured out which of us is more clever.

So I plugged the infernal machine back in and went about a normal day of microwave use. I love my microwave. The next morning, the little bastard was back! In the door! Maybe he never left, but rather found some sort of nook or cranny to hide in. Anyway, the microwave got unplugged for another day. Not just for the sake of the little wiggler but for humanity's sake too!

I mean, what if my microwave turned the harmless little guy into wigzilla or something? What then??? I mean, if he only grew to the size of a small dog, then I could use his pinchers to open jars & cans & whatnot. But any bigger and it could be the end of the world as we know it.

But wait! No need to go on a looting spree and break out the zombie apocolypse gear. It's been a few weeks since the original incident and there have been no more "earwig in my microwave" sightings. It could be that the little fella has gone off to romance some ladywigs or perhaps he's in the basement trying to convert the spiders to his cause (whatever his cause may be). But rest assured, the destruction of the human race has been delayed. For a while.

[Freehold DM]

Sorry dude I got you beat. Nothing quite matches the time I

Spoiler:

found a family of cockroaches living in the microwave

Needless to say, I didn't want anything warm for breakfast that day, so I fell back on an old standby- corn flakes. Unfortunately...

Spoiler:

there were roaches in there as well...they fell out along with crispy flakes of corn.

I was living at my grandmother's at that time...I complained to her and she called the exterminator. Still, I was leery about eating at her place, even when she left it to us when she went into the nursing home.

[Evan Whitefield]

Growing up, my parents house always had earwigs and one day I too found one in the microwave. While I was just going to squish it with a paper towel my mom decides to "nuke" it, so she shuts the door and turns the microwave on hign for 15 secs. Well wouldn't you know 5 seconds into there is a bright flash of light from within the oven and the thing just dies. Not the earwig mind you but the microwave! The earwig was fine! We deciede the fates wanted this thing to live, so I let I go outside and we went out and bought a new microwave.

[Galdor the Great]

It's been nearly a month and no further sightings of the earwig in my microwave. I just thought you should know.

[The Thing from Beyond the Edge]

Galdor the Great wrote:

It seemed that either I or the earwig had outwitted the other, though I haven't quite figured out which of us is more clever.

Why do I not find that surprisong? Would you like to have that uncertainty removed?

:-)

J/K

[Andrew Turner]

In the mid nineties, I stayed at hotel in New Mexico (once) and roaches literally poured out the bathtub faucet when I turned the tap. I complained and they gave me another room. I took it, the taps were clear, and I went to sleep with the radio playing. After a night of most spectacularly chitinous nightmares, I awoke in the hot dark to this scritch-scritch-scritch-scritch and intermittent radio static. I flipped the light switch and there was this god-awfully ginormous cockroach dancing a jig on the tip of the radio antenna. I went ahead and checked out and drove on. Needless to say, Mr. O'brian's cage for me would be filled with roaches.

[Crimson Jester]

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