Spiff, the StarBold!'s page

"Alex-person still salty no steal Spiff GO FAST??"

"Spiff! very lonely adventuring out with the Society while knowing that the evil horrible dragon corporations are keeping their fellow kobolds locked in long-term indentured servitude even worse than AbadarCorp's contracts. Please free Spiff's people!"

"Spiff Agree but no agree with evil! Spiff think evil too much effort and make slow no-scales want to kill Spiff and other kobolds. Spiff think all kobolds important, more important than what dragons pretend to let kobolds think they are."

"Spiff have big adventures lately! Spiff ride train that stopped really hard HERESY! then went really, really, really FAST! WHEEEEEEEE!"

Spiff then realized that not everyone is a worshipper of Speed, terrified to heck and slowed train down to 'boring slow stop'.

"Then Spiff got to go to other worlds in other place/time/stuff and think that Speed is a Constant. Suggest everyone try this experience!"

Spiff was incredibly saddened when most of the worlds in question DIDN'T have ways of going really FAST.

"But most recently, Spiff got to go to REDACTED and zip around as part of worship practices as part of Speed religion but evil monsters from plane of YouNoGoFast attempt to make Spiff NoGoFast. Was followed by cheaty dogs that walked through angles but no run. What point of going fast to places if no go fast?"

Spiff's encounters in a certain cross-time Special package may be overstated or understated. Viewer discretion advised.

((Spiff is a ranged solarian with Solar Flare, Fleet, and Jet Dash. Spiff may have forgetten that they had Jet Dash during all the excitement for Reasons...))

Spiff! believe that GOING FAST among the stars is most important thing in LIFE. You go slow, you DIE! No go slow? No die!

#SAVEZIGGY!

"So we were sent to infiltrate a facility and recover computer data and then we got to the computer and discovered -- none of us knew how to use a computer! Thank goodness the researchers that were there had their hearts melted by a crying skittermander because I was afraid we were going to have to shoot it out and that could have been messy."