Y'all kick back now cuz this story'll blow yer puny lil' minds.
Y'see, an' this'll shock ya, but I'mma gnome. I live 'bout four miles up-road from Oleg's, in a hole, an' a hole was good 'nuf for me pa an' it's good 'nuf fer me.
I shot me a deer once from aways far away once, an' then I made that dumb thing inter stew! Best day've my life.
I gotta horse what stomps on apples fer no got-dang reason! An' I kept it ennyways!
Excitin' things happen t'me every day, son. I'll tag 'long if'n ya want, but I can't right say you can take my non-stoppin' drama.
So that's my story an' don't let no dang mule or dog tell you otherwise, or ol' Groety uppin that thar night sky'll come on down an' smash yer dumb face.
C'mon, Applecrusher. Tonight we're ridin' all th'way ter Oleg's! Yeeeeeeehaw!
--
Nubs carves a living out of hunting wildlife, tending to a few fruit trees, and scavenging leftovers from brigand-looted traders and travelers along the South Rostland Road. His home is a dugout nook a few miles north of Oleg's post; despite his proximity, he doesn't venture into it for fear of drawing unnecessary attention to himself.
His clothes are all tattered human-sized clothes roughly cut to fit him, a comically wide-brimmed black hat set low on his darkening violet hair. All of his gear is cobbled together or lifted from bandits or the remains of their overwhelmed prey. Nubs's craggy face looks decades older than his age, and could pass as a halfling if not for his exaggerated nose and ears.
Fearing the Bleaching as his hair turns darker and skin paler with each year, he comes across a charter to explore the Stolen Lands and decides to ride his apple-stomping pony into Oleg's to tag along--maybe even with the group's permission.
Statblock:
Nubbawub Sodtopper
Male Gnome Ranger 1
CG Small Humanoid (gnome)
Init +5; Senses low-light vision; Perception +6
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Defense
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AC 16, touch 14, flat-footed 13 (+2 armor, +3 Dex, +1 size)
hp 11 (1d10+1)
Fort +3, Ref +5, Will +0; +2 vs. illusions
Defensive Abilities defensive training
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Offense
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Speed 20 ft.
Melee Sword cane +4 (1d4+2/x2)
Ranged Shortbow, Comp. (Str +2) +5 (1d4+2/x3)
Special Attacks favored enemy (humans +2), hatred
Spell-Like Abilities Dancing Lights (1/day), Ghost Sound (1/day), Prestidigitation (1/day), Speak with Animals (1/day)
Ranger Spells Prepared (CL 0):
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Statistics
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Str 14, Dex 16, Con 12, Int 10, Wis 11, Cha 11
Base Atk +1; CMB +2; CMD 15
Feats Point Blank Shot
Traits Pioneer (Survival), Reactionary
Skills Acrobatics +3 (-1 jump), Bluff +0 (+2 vs. humans), Climb +6, Craft (bows) +4, Fly +5, Handle Animal +4, Knowledge (geography) +4 (+6 vs. humans), Perception +6 (+8 vs. humans), Sense Motive +0 (+2 vs. humans), Stealth +11, Survival +5 (+7 to avoid becoming lost when using a Mapmaker's Kit as you travel, +7 vs. humans, +6 to track)
Languages Common, Gnome, Sylvan
SQ illusion resistance, track, wild empathy
Other Gear Leather armor, Arrows (40), Shortbow, Comp. (Str +2), Sword cane, Backpack (66 @ 27.5 lbs), Belt pouch (1 @ 0.16 lbs), Mapmaker's kit, Piton (5), Torch (20), 8 SP
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Special Abilities
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Dancing Lights (1/day) (Sp) With Charisma 11+, cast Dancing Lights once per day.
Defensive Training +4 Gain a dodge bonus to AC vs monsters of the Giant subtype.
Favored Enemy (Humans +2) (Ex) +2 to rolls vs Favored Enemy (Humans).
Ghost Sound (1/day) (Sp) With Charisma 11+, cast Ghost Sound once per day.
Hatred +1 Gain a bonus to attack vs goblinoid/reptilian humanoids.
Illusion Resistance +2 racial bonus to saves against illusions.
Low-Light Vision See twice as far as a human in low light, distinguishing color and detail.
Mapmaker's kit +2 Circumstance for Survival to avoid becoming lost.
Point Blank Shot +1 to attack and damage rolls with ranged weapons at up to 30 feet.
Prestidigitation (1/day) (Sp) With Charisma 11+, cast Prestidigitation once per day.
Speak with Animals (1/day) (Sp) With Charisma 11+, cast Speak with Animals once per day.
Track +1 Add the listed bonus to survival checks made to track.
Wild Empathy +1 (Ex) Improve the attitude of an animal, as if using Diplomacy.
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Mighty Steed:
Applecrusher
Male Horse, Pony
N Medium Animal
Init +1; Senses low-light vision, scent; Perception +5
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Defense
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AC 11, touch 11, flat-footed 10 (+1 Dex)
hp 13 (2d8+4)
Fort +5 (+4 vs. hot or cold environments and to resist damage from suffocation), Ref +4, Will +0
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Offense
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Speed 40 ft.
Melee Hooves x2 (Horse, Pony) +2 x2 (1d3+1/x2)
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Statistics
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Str 13, Dex 13, Con 14, Int 2, Wis 11, Cha 4
Base Atk +1; CMB +2; CMD 13 (17 vs. Trip)
Feats Endurance, Run
Tricks Come [Trick], Heel [Trick], Riding [Trick], Stay [Trick]
Skills Acrobatics +1 (+5 to jump with a running start, +5 jump), Perception +5, Swim +1 (+5 to resist nonlethal damage from exhaustion)
Languages SQ riding [trick]
Other Gear Bear trap, Bedroll, Lamp, Oil (3), Rope, Sack (2 @ 11 lbs), Sack (5 @ 14.25 lbs)
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Special Abilities
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Endurance +4 to a variety of skill checks. Sleep in L/M armor with no fatigue.
Low-Light Vision See twice as far as a human in low light, distinguishing color and detail.
Riding [Trick] The animal has been trained to bear a rider.
Run Run 5x your speed in light/medium armor or 4x speed in heavy armor and keep Dex when running.
Scent (Ex) Detect opponents within 15+ feet by sense of smell.
