| Niktorak |
| 7 people marked this as a favorite. |
This is a set of communications I had with Andrew White the writer of Wardens of Wildwood Book 1: Pactbreaker
I have been given the permission to share this with the community in an effort to help bring more insight into the AP and project as a whole.
The first set of responses are direct replies to my Book 1 Review that you can find bellow:
General Observations
Before diving into specific chapters, I want to highlight some inconsistencies found in the book. For instance, the location of Corozal in the Viridian Nexus is described as both 200 miles and 50 miles away in different paragraphs. Additionally, the timeline of Valanar the Green’s tenure is conflicting; he’s mentioned as being elected in 4700 and ruling since, but another part claims he’s ruled for 17 years. Clarification on these points would be great.
Chapter 1: Greenwood Gala
The Greenwood Gala is an engaging start to the adventure, with well-developed NPCs like Alyce and Tanasha adding depth to the event. The activities, including the Cabber Toss and Flyting Contest, are creative and fun. However, the rules for the Parasmati game need further clarification to ensure smooth gameplay. It’s also unclear if there are additional background events that could allow for potential failure by the players, as the current setup seems to guarantee their success.
The terror attack is a pivotal moment, but there are several unanswered questions:
Starting Unrest Points: The initial amount of unrest that the players should contend with isn’t specified.
Valanar the Green’s Inaction: As a 15th level Archdruid, Valanar’s failure to defend himself from the seedpod is puzzling. Did he deliberately allow the attack? His unwillingness to be resurrected hints at deeper motives that need exploration.
Investigation Gaps: Players can find evidence linking the terror attack to Taldor, yet there’s no immediate investigation, and no one claims responsibility. The GM is left without clear guidance on the perpetrator’s identity, which is frustrating for both the GM and players. The GM not knowing who perpetrated the attacks in Book 1 or 2 is not acceptable. I'm not a player you don't need to keep me in the dark.
Chapter 2: Wildfires
At this stage, players possess a map indicating a location tied to the terror attack, yet Emorga insists on prioritizing the search for Corozal to foresee future events and reduce unrest. This feels disconnected from the main narrative. As of right now you could remove all of Chapter 2 and it wouldn't impact the overall story the AP is trying to tell.
Flashpoints: Each flashpoint in this chapter appears isolated, lacking a cohesive story arc that advances the main plot. The tasks—though varied and potentially engaging—do not uncover new evidence or further the investigation into the attack. Seemingly used to waste time before the vote for a new Wildwood Lodge leader takes place in a months time.
Chapter 3: Fallen Leaves
This chapter revolves around a crucial vote at the Gala grounds, now marred by a recent terror attack. What was Wildwood leadership doing in the month the players were gone?
Vote Dynamics: The introduction of new guests vying for leadership feels sudden. Why is there no representation from the Wildwood Lodge to reclaim their position? Lodge officials are mentioned as being present but not actively participating, which is confusing.
Influence Mechanics: Gaining influence seems pointless when the vote is inevitably stolen by Ruzadoya Swiftmane. This undermines players’ efforts, leading to frustration.
Aftermath of the Vote: After Ruzadoya’s unexpected victory, the narrative lacks urgency. Despite the treaty being nullified and the Gala attendees accepting an undead leader, the players are told to wait 8 hours before leaving. This delay is perplexing given the high stakes.
Downtime Misalignment: Post-escape, players are given as much downtime as they like. This is illogical as immediate action is required. Taldor’s implication in the terror attacks and the nullification of the treaty demand a swift response.
Political Response: There’s no mention of Eutropia’s reaction to the unfolding events. Given Taldor’s significant role, her response is crucial and should be clearly addressed.
Recommendations for Improvement
Consistency: Ensure information is consistent throughout the book, especially regarding key details like distances and timelines.
Clarify Rules: Provide clearer rules and potential outcomes for events like the Parasmati game.
Investigative Path: Establish a clear investigative path post-terror attack, allowing players to follow leads and uncover the perpetrators.
Narrative Urgency: Maintain narrative urgency, especially after significant events like the terror attack and the vote.
Political Dynamics: Detail the political dynamics and responses from key figures like Eutropia to provide context and direction for the players.
Player Agency: Ensure players’ efforts have meaningful impacts on the story, avoiding scenarios where their actions feel futile.
Thank you for taking your time to read all of this feedback. I hope it helps improve future AP's.
Andrew's Response
Hello! Someone alerted me this morning to some issues you've been having with an AP volume I wrote (Pactbreaker, Wardens of Wildwood #1). With the caveat that none of this can be considered official, as the story stopped really being mine as soon as I sent in my final turnover (and with a secondary caveat that it's still probably as official as you're gonna get, since we rarely if ever issue errata on APs), I can at least explain my intentions and try to answer any specific questions you might have.
If you have any other questions or need any further clarification, feel free to reach out and I'll try to help however I can. Sorry to hear about all of the issues you had, but I appreciate the useful criticism.
How far from the Greenwood Gala is Corazal? My intention was to make it 200 miles; that was the impetus for adding fast-moving forest mount animals in the first place. I'm not sure if the change to 50 was a typo or a deliberate edit.
How long has Valenar been running the Lodge? I couldn’t find anywhere stating that he’d been ruling for 17 years, but I can confirm that’s not correct; he was elected in 4700, which puts the length of his tenure at 24 years by present day. *Niktorak's note; This discrepancy is in the Player's Guide.*
Prismati: It does appear that some of the rules were accidentally left out, possibly during copyfit or editing. For example, I can confirm that the base score for a single throw is supposed to be 3 points, minus 1 for each additional catch along the way. I’d be happy to check my original draft if you have any other questions, since it was definitely playable at one point.
Starting Unrest Points: Unrest was intended to start at 1 after the inciting event at the Gala and increase or decrease from there based on the PCs’ actions. Not sure where that went.
Valenar the Green’s Inaction: This is unfortunately one of those “where were the rest of the Avengers during Iron Man 3?” questions that doesn’t really have a satisfactory answer. The overarching story of Wardens of Wildwood is predicated on Valenar being one-shotted at the Gala by something that a group of 5th-level PCs can handle, so the fact that he’s technically a 15th-level NPC kinda gets handwaved. If you want, you have my permission to have him show up at the ceremony all sweaty and disheveled from singlehandedly fighting off an Extreme threat during the boat ride over that left him with only 3 Hit Points.
Valenar the Green’s Reincarnation: Similarly, the story outline didn’t really provide any rationale behind Valenar’s decision to stay dead beyond the “he was ready to retire anyway” explanation you get from Emorga. I can’t really blame you if you want to criticize this as weak storytelling, but the question of how to make death meaningful in a world with resurrection magic has been around for pretty much as long as TTRPGs (which is of course why 2e makes those spells/rituals Uncommon). Incidentally, that’s one way you can justify him staying dead if “dunno, he didn’t answer” isn’t satisfactory; you can either rule that the Reincarnate ritual just doesn’t exist, being Uncommon, or that there’s nobody high enough level around to cast the 7th-rank version you’d need to bring back a level 15 NPC.
Who Did the Thing? OK, I’ll take responsibility for this one. Our story outline didn’t specify who was responsible for the attack, and in fact advised against providing anything more than circumstantial evidence at the scene, since the whole purpose of the inciting event was to set everyone at each other’s throats by making it unclear who was to blame. Initially, one of the quests I wrote for Chapter 2 did involve the PCs tracking down the culprit, only to discover that it was a random act of terrorism committed over a personal grudge that had nothing to do with Andoran, Taldor, Zibik, or the Lodge – but the individual responsible would be killed in the confrontation, leaving the PCs without sufficient proof to convince any of the various factions who’d already decided who they wanted to hold responsible. That quest ended up getting cut for space, because it didn’t move the Unrest needle in any meaningful way and wasn’t really what Chapter 2 was supposed to be about anyway (see below), and was replaced by some evidence the PCs could discover that would implicate an NPC killed in the attack whose methods and motivations would be expanded upon in Book 2. That clearly didn’t end up happening, probably also because of space limitations, so that plot thread ended up dangling unresolved forever (I think – I haven’t read Book 3 yet). Our intention was to create a “when the house is on fire, figuring out who lit the match is secondary at best to extinguishing the flames” scenario, but I totally sympathize with the frustration over never actually getting that answer, even if knowing it ultimately wouldn’t have changed anything.
Flashpoints: The criticism that all of the events in Chapter 2 are isolated events that have no cohesive story arc and don’t advance the overall plot is a fair one, but that’s by design – the direction behind Chapter 2 was to give the PCs a glimpse of things going to hell all over the region, create opportunities for them to improve things (or make them worse), and introduce them to NPCs and locations that might play a part in later volumes. If that feels like a distraction, I guess I can understand where you’re coming from, but I don’t necessarily agree that the flashpoints are a waste of time just because they don’t directly affect the metaplot.
Vote Dynamics: It seems to only have a brief mention in the final book (this may be another unfortunate casualty of things getting cut for space), but Emorga is supposed to be the Lodge’s candidate to succeed Valenar, although she openly states that she only intends to hold the role until the Forest can be restabilized and then appoint a successor of her own. The purpose of the PCs’ actions in the first part of Chapter 3 is to keep the opposition from consolidating around any one of the hawkish candidates so that Emorga can sweep the election herself.
Influence Mechanics: This is also fair criticism, and I can’t really defend it beyond pointing out that the election needs to go the way it does in other for the rest of the Adventure Path to happen. The consolation prize was supposed to be that the Influence you gained while trying to affect the vote would be of use to you later – and it sort of is, at least with some of the NPCs, but probably not to the extent that it should have been. I will say that the other two writers and I did sit down and go over a list of all the NPCs the PCs could gain Influence with in Book 1, expressly so that opportunities for it to play a role could be included in later volumes, but at the end of the day, every book in an Adventure Path has a specific number of plot points it needs to hit and only so many pages to cover all of them.
Aftermath of the Vote: Again, fair criticism, although my intention here was that even after the clear intentions that Ruzadoya lays out in her acceptance speech, things don’t go from zero to war crime immediately; there’s still at least a little time for the PCs and other various good guys to have their “So, uh, how in trouble are we? Should we just cut and run immediately, or is there still a chance to salvage something here? Should we ask Emorga? Where is she, anyway?” conversations before it becomes absolutely clear that, yeah, it’s bad, get out while you can. You can certainly accelerate things, if it makes more sense to you that way.
Downtime Misalignment: Likewise, this can certainly be accelerated if you prefer. My thoughts around downtime at the end of the adventure were based on the idea it would take some time for Ruzadoya to gather her forces and exert full control over what was left of the Lodge, which would give the PCs some time to address non-immediate business of their own. I suppose I could have put an upper limit on the downtime available, but the unspoken intention is that the PCs should have enough time (within reason) to accomplish a few things they didn’t have time to do before, seeing as most of the rest of the volume is on a pretty strict timetable.
Political Response: : This is another valid point, and I unfortunately don’t have much to counter it with other than the dreaded “beyond the scope of this adventure” cheat: in other words, because this is an Adventure Path focused on the Verduran Forest and not Taldan politics, any major Taldan (or Andoren) involvement likely needs to happen offscreen. That said, I would personally argue that Taldor is certainly aware that sending armies into the forest to engage a horde of murderous fey on their home turf would be suicide, so their response would necessarily be limited to providing support to the opposition, which could take a lot of different forms depending on how glowingly Tanasha Starborne describes the PCs to Eutropia (another opportunity for Influence to come into play).