Thanks, Redeux!
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I hope Redelia feels better soon!
I thoroughly enjoyed this group, as well as our extra-special send-off mini-scenario. HUZZAH! Goblins 4 EVA! Wait, not Eva. Evva? YEAH! Goblins for Evva and Eva!
Skills and Powers:
SKILLS
Strength d8 [ ]+1 [ ]+2
Dexterity d8 [X] +1 [ ] +2 [ ] +3 [ ] +4 Stealth: Dexterity +1 Constitution d8 [X] +1 [ ] +2 [ ] +3 [ ] +4 Fortitude: Constitution +2 Intelligence d8 [ ] +1 [ ] +2 Wisdom d6 [ ] +1 [ ] +2 Survival: Wisdom +1 Charisma d4 [ ] +1 Favored Card: None
Ak smirks at Poog's challenge. "You no real chief. You see what real chief look like!"
Skills and Powers:
SKILLS
Strength d8 [ ]+1 [ ]+2
Dexterity d8 [X] +1 [ ] +2 [ ] +3 [ ] +4 Stealth: Dexterity +1 Constitution d8 [X] +1 [ ] +2 [ ] +3 [ ] +4 Fortitude: Constitution +2 Intelligence d8 [ ] +1 [ ] +2 Wisdom d6 [ ] +1 [ ] +2 Survival: Wisdom +1 Charisma d4 [ ] +1 Favored Card: None
In response to Ak's flourish with his weird skull-topped mace, Ak juggles his Big Shiny in his Shiny Fist.
Ak catches his Big Shiny in his mouth. Poog looks on, tongue hanging out of his mouth.
Ak almost laughs out loud as he sees Poog stick his hand inside campfire and withdraw it in satisfaction. "You call that 'brave'?!?" Ak says, jumping into the middle of the campfire and rolling around.
Ak pops out of the fire again, singed but smiling. "Ha!" the pallid goblin says. Poog frowns and begins mumbling in a weird high-pitched voice.
Ak cricks his neck at Poog. "What you doing now?" the scrawny pale goblin grunts, unimpressed. Poog immediately stops mumbling.
Poog attempts a headstand. "Really?" Ak looks on in bemusement.
Poog begins murmuring to his god. "Zarongel won't help you now! You follow Ak!"
Ak marches up to Poog and smacks him in the face with the back of his pale hand.
And so it was that day that the remains of the Birdcruncher Tribe came to be ruled by the remaining few members of the Licktoad tribe, and Ak was their king. And all lived happilly ever after, or until the next floods came through and wiped out the entire village. THE END!
Ak will take a card feat and add an Ally. He'll use Gugmuff XXXII for that upgrade. He'll take the Blessing of Venkelvore as an upgrade to replace one of his Blessing of the Gobs (4). If no one else cares about them, he'll take his 2 upgrades in the form of the two armors: he will upgrade his armors to an Armor 1 (Magic Studded Leather) and Armor 2 (Shark Skin Armor). They are moot as Ak will swap them out for the Dragon Costume and the Goblin Gun-Shield thing as soon as the scenario starts. (only if no one wants it)
Ak's draws: (the AD2 variant)
I'll wait to make my preferences for boons and card feats known until I see what all is available. I'm very excited to add Lamashtu's Bauble to the deck box of my Varian character who's venturing on the high seas with two other goblins in his party - it's going to be a hoot!
If necessary: Ak slices into the stupid goblin snake. Ak hacks into the silly snake with glee.
A long-tongued smelly used-to-be longshanks races at the pale goblin. ”Ak not that pale, am Ak?” the scrawny goblin asks with self-consciousness.
Ak carves the ghoul up when he doesn’t get the answer he wants from his tribe mates.
[ooc]SUCCESS! Discard Blessing of Gorum to explore again and encounter Longsword.
Ak’s friend scouts ahead and suggests Ak avoids the icky maiden trapped in the cage. The rusty longsword looks much more interesting. It falls apart when Ak touches it. Stupid longsword - not strong enough for Ak!
Animalbane Dagger +1, Tossglove, Blessing of the Gobs 5, Blessing of the Gobs 3, Emerald of Dexterity
The bony no-meats come rushing at Ak. ”No fun to chop bony boners!” Ak says, whipping out his amazing hand banger. ”You go pop now!”
As per usual, Ak winds up on his back, giggling maniacally after scattering the bones of his skeletal foe.
Skinsaw Cultist:
Human Cultist
Check to defeat: Combat 11 If undefeated, shuffle the top card of the blessings deck into this location deck. If defeated, you may immediately attempt to close this location. Ak grins wickedly as a masked longshanks appears in front of him. "Ak happy to see you! Ak wonder if he gonna get to stab anything. Now Ak no worry!"
Ak stabs and stabs again. The muffled noises from behind the mask as the ritualist falls indicates that it doesn't enjoy the stabbing as much as Ak does.
Ak finds a small sack containing some drinks in glass bottles and some bits of sharp metal. He amuses himself by smashing everything in the sack into bits as he waits for the other gobbos to catch up.
The other gobbos are so slow! Ak takes a moment to toss rocks at a skeletal human chained up to a wall outside the compound. Redbutt gets bored and hops off.
Ak's first few rocks fail to connect with the skeleton, so the pallid goblin marches right up to the skeleton and bashes it directly with a large rock in his hand. It crumbles to pieces. "Yup. Ak strongest and best," he remarks.
Skills and Powers: SKILLS
Strength d8 [ ]+1 [ ]+2
Dexterity d8 [X] +1 [ ] +2 [ ] +3 [ ] +4 Stealth: Dexterity +1 Constitution d8 [X] +1 [ ] +2 [ ] +3 [ ] +4 Fortitude: Constitution +2 Intelligence d8 [ ] +1 [ ] +2 Wisdom d6 [ ] +1 [ ] +2 Survival: Wisdom +1 Charisma d4 [ ] +1 Favored Card: None
Ak smirks at the advance of the zombie things and pulls out his hand banger.
Ak giggles as he picks himself up from the kickback of his ridiculous gun. The zombie smokes in parts on the ground.
I'm fine to not take Squealy Nord in lieu of someone else. No worries.
"This place look like it burn good!" Ak says eagerly.
Skills and Powers: SKILLS
Strength d8 [ ]+1 [ ]+2
Dexterity d8 [X] +1 [ ] +2 [ ] +3 [ ] +4 Stealth: Dexterity +1 Constitution d8 [X] +1 [ ] +2 [ ] +3 [ ] +4 Fortitude: Constitution +2 Intelligence d8 [ ] +1 [ ] +2 Wisdom d6 [ ] +1 [ ] +2 Survival: Wisdom +1 Charisma d4 [ ] +1 Favored Card: None
New baby was born 3 days ago. Mum and new peanut are both doing well. Sleep is coming sparingly; I do appreciate all y'alls patience. I'll get to posts, but I'll simply be slower about it. Thanks!
I'll pass on that Item 2, in retrospect. No upgrade for Ak.
Ak would like the Ally 2.
I'd be interested in Squealy Nord, but I'm open to discussion.
Ak watches as the weird goblin who talks to himself enters the shed, collapsing it around their ears. The pallid goblin frowns in frustration and leaves. He spies a series of graves and scampers to see what fun he can find.
A fire-breathing boar races out at Ak! The goblin grins and pulls out his shiny modified shield.
Ak sidesteps the boar’s charge and ignites the rocket attached to the shield, blowing himself and the piggy high into the air.
Ak looks around in the wake of the thundering owl-beast's departure. Seeing shelves still up, he decides to continue to peruse.
"Ahhhh! Words!! MAGIC words!! AHHHHH!"
Ak races away from the writing on the wall, somehow hooking his belt loop on a scroll case on a lower shelf and dragging it along with him. Out of sheer terror, the pallid goblin sends his hat-wearing ranger friend in to look around.
The ranger warns Ak of yet another bit of writing on a piece of paper near a choppy-blade trap-thingy (that sounds very interesting) as well as a neato-looking knife. Ak's momentary panic quells rapidly at the idea of a new knife.
The knife sure is neato. Ak tries to use it to hack through the choppy-blade trap-thingy.
"This too easy!" Ak marvels. "Where the real trap-----eep!" Ak forgot that the choppy-blade trap-thingy was next to more writing.
Ak stabs and stabs and stabs some more at the sheet of paper pinned to the wall. He doesn't notice the bit of paper stuck to his blade as he pulls it away, part of its magic somehow still intact at the end of a dogslicer.
Ak also doesn't notice that he's stabbed straight through the remaining load-bearing wall of the alchemical shed. The entire shack begins to quake.
Skills and Powers:
SKILLS
Strength d8 [ ]+1 [ ]+2
Dexterity d8 [X] +1 [ ] +2 [ ] +3 [ ] +4 Stealth: Dexterity +1 Constitution d8 [X] +1 [ ] +2 [ ] +3 [ ] +4 Fortitude: Constitution +2 Intelligence d8 [ ] +1 [ ] +2 Wisdom d6 [ ] +1 [ ] +2 Survival: Wisdom +1 Charisma d4 [ ] +1 Favored Card: None
Ak finds a bite to his torso as well as a roof over his head after failing to close the shed. Still, the creature ran off....
Skills and Powers: SKILLS
Strength d8 [ ]+1 [ ]+2
Dexterity d8 [X] +1 [ ] +2 [ ] +3 [ ] +4 Stealth: Dexterity +1 Constitution d8 [X] +1 [ ] +2 [ ] +3 [ ] +4 Fortitude: Constitution +2 Intelligence d8 [ ] +1 [ ] +2 Wisdom d6 [ ] +1 [ ] +2 Survival: Wisdom +1 Charisma d4 [ ] +1 Favored Card: None
Ak continues to poke through the dusty shelves full of old glass containers.
He finds one to his liking and pockets it.
A roaring beast of strange bear-bird mixture crashes through the door of the shed, intent on goblin flesh!
The strange beast rips into Ak's pack, spilling its contents. Ak smirks and steps back. "You kill Ak's pack! Now you suffer Ak attack!" The goblin almost pauses his knife slash to consider the new song he composed on the spot.
Ak stabs the thing enough that it runs away through one of the walls. The old shed sways crazily, threatening collapse!
The shed collapses, leaving Ak roofless. Curiously enough, nothing falls on the pallid goblin.
Skills and Powers: SKILLS
Strength d8 [ ]+1 [ ]+2
Dexterity d8 [X] +1 [ ] +2 [ ] +3 [ ] +4 Stealth: Dexterity +1 Constitution d8 [X] +1 [ ] +2 [ ] +3 [ ] +4 Fortitude: Constitution +2 Intelligence d8 [ ] +1 [ ] +2 Wisdom d6 [ ] +1 [ ] +2 Survival: Wisdom +1 Charisma d4 [ ] +1 Favored Card: None
Ak continues poking around the interesting shed.
Ak uncovers a useful drink bottle and pockets it.
Ak also finds a useless stick that he promptly breaks in twain. "Hee hee."
Skills and Powers: SKILLS
Strength d8 [ ]+1 [ ]+2
Dexterity d8 [X] +1 [ ] +2 [ ] +3 [ ] +4 Stealth: Dexterity +1 Constitution d8 [X] +1 [ ] +2 [ ] +3 [ ] +4 Fortitude: Constitution +2 Intelligence d8 [ ] +1 [ ] +2 Wisdom d6 [ ] +1 [ ] +2 Survival: Wisdom +1 Charisma d4 [ ] +1 Favored Card: None
I'll await the retcon before posting.
It's Reepazo's turn, right?
Ak scampers into the old stone workshed and finds strange symbols on the wall.
"Nope, not writing at all," Ak muses as he peels the boards with the symbols off and affixes them to his torso and back as armor.
Skills and Powers: SKILLS
Strength d8 [ ]+1 [ ]+2
Dexterity d8 [X] +1 [ ] +2 [ ] +3 [ ] +4 Stealth: Dexterity +1 Constitution d8 [X] +1 [ ] +2 [ ] +3 [ ] +4 Fortitude: Constitution +2 Intelligence d8 [ ] +1 [ ] +2 Wisdom d6 [ ] +1 [ ] +2 Survival: Wisdom +1 Charisma d4 [ ] +1 Favored Card: None
Ak tumbles safely out of the way.
Skills and Powers: SKILLS
Strength d8 [ ]+1 [ ]+2
Dexterity d8 [X] +1 [ ] +2 [ ] +3 [ ] +4 Stealth: Dexterity +1 Constitution d8 [X] +1 [ ] +2 [ ] +3 [ ] +4 Fortitude: Constitution +2 Intelligence d8 [ ] +1 [ ] +2 Wisdom d6 [ ] +1 [ ] +2 Survival: Wisdom +1 Charisma d4 [ ] +1 Favored Card: None
Ak looks around at Reepazo and Poog. "It good that you follow leader," he says bluntly as he pushes through the weeds.
Amazingly enough, Reepazo and Poog don't argue with Ak! Ak sends his underling forward to looks for things to stab.
Ak's ranger friend returns to tell about the stupid skeleton and the stupid giant traipsing through the garden along with something that goes bump in the night. Not sure how something can go bump in the night in the middle of the day, the pallid goblin decides to handle the skeleton.
goes the hand-banger as the skeleton clatters into a pile of disrupted bone fragments. Ak giggles. "Is good fun," Ak wheezes and chortles.
Skills and Powers: SKILLS
Strength d8 [ ]+1 [ ]+2
Dexterity d8 [X] +1 [ ] +2 [ ] +3 [ ] +4 Stealth: Dexterity +1 Constitution d8 [X] +1 [ ] +2 [ ] +3 [ ] +4 Fortitude: Constitution +2 Intelligence d8 [ ] +1 [ ] +2 Wisdom d6 [ ] +1 [ ] +2 Survival: Wisdom +1 Charisma d4 [ ] +1 Favored Card: None
Ak will take the Goblin Buckler Gun and Sweet Dragon Costume loot from previous scenarios as temporary cards to his deck again this game.
"This place so pretty! Look at weeds!" Ak seems strangely enamoured of the pathetic growing patch.
Skills and Powers: SKILLS
Strength d8 [ ]+1 [ ]+2
Dexterity d8 [X] +1 [ ] +2 [ ] +3 [ ] +4 Stealth: Dexterity +1 Constitution d8 [X] +1 [ ] +2 [ ] +3 [ ] +4 Fortitude: Constitution +2 Intelligence d8 [ ] +1 [ ] +2 Wisdom d6 [ ] +1 [ ] +2 Survival: Wisdom +1 Charisma d4 [ ] +1 Favored Card: None
No upgrade for Ak. And yes - two gobbo thumbs down for that stupid scenario.
I'm confused....do we each draw Card 2 for ourselves, or is it just the person who had the Shiny Eye Thing last? Ak will take the "[X] or 2 or 6" power, allowing him to reset his hand at 2 or 6 cards at the end of his turn. I'll roll for the Blessing 2 (first priority), but I'll defer to the end on other cards.
Ak stumbles across a creature burrowing through the nettles as the call from Scribbleface goes out to bar the path. "Ak show how he best Chief by following Scribbleface orders!" the pallid goblins reasons in his illogical fashion.
Ghoul:
Monster 2
Traits: Elite Ghoul Undead To Defeat: Combat 11 The Ghoul is immune to the Mental and Poison traits. If undefeated, reset your hand and end your turn. An undead goblin with a long purple tongue crashes out of the brambles, intent upon Ak!
The ghoul gets the better of Ak, deflecting his blade and pinning the goblin to the ground. "no...No....NO....NOOOOOO!" Ak loses it and rages a bit.
Ak's temper tantrum sinks the blade of knife enough times into the undead goblin's face that it stops moving. "Yes, that what Ak meant to do."
Skills and Powers: SKILLS
Strength d8 [ ]+1 [ ]+2
Dexterity d8 [X] +1 [ ] +2 [ ] +3 [ ] +4 Stealth: Dexterity +1 Constitution d8 [X] +1 [ ] +2 [ ] +3 [ ] +4 Fortitude: Constitution +2 Intelligence d8 [ ] +1 [ ] +2 Wisdom d6 [ ] +1 [ ] +2 Survival: Wisdom +1 Charisma d4 [ ] +1 Favored Card: None
Ak is still sulking as he makes his way through the nettles. "Stupid Poog. Didn't have to bash Ak to get that stupid eye thingy. Would've let him play with it some. Not have it, but play with it. Hmph."
A snake with a strange goblin-head slithers up to Ak. "We gonna be friends?" Ak asks hopefully. The snake responds by biting onto his ankle. "Ow. Guess not."
Ak skewers the strange serpent through the head and peels it off of his leg. Biting into it, Ak chews thoughtfully. "Hmmm. Not bad. Not good, either."
Skills and Powers: SKILLS
Strength d8 [ ]+1 [ ]+2
Dexterity d8 [X] +1 [ ] +2 [ ] +3 [ ] +4 Stealth: Dexterity +1 Constitution d8 [X] +1 [ ] +2 [ ] +3 [ ] +4 Fortitude: Constitution +2 Intelligence d8 [ ] +1 [ ] +2 Wisdom d6 [ ] +1 [ ] +2 Survival: Wisdom +1 Charisma d4 [ ] +1 Favored Card: None
Having been jumped by Poog and robbed by not-Scribbleface, the small pale goblin licks his wounds and sulks at one of his favourite places, the brambled mess known as Nettlemaze. "Stupid gobbos....think they better Chief than Ak....Ak show them....don't need Shiny Eye Thing to be Big Chief....still, Shiny Eye Thing fun...."
A festering corpse of a long-dead explorer attracted by the scent of living flesh rises from the ground and stalks Ak. Ak fails to see it coming. The goblin draws his magic hand-banger and fires a shot in frustration at his current state.
Ak's bullet obliterates the upper half of the infected zombie and the undead's remains drop back down into the mire of brambles. Ak continues sulking. "Stupid gun.....not as much fun as Shiny Eye Thing....still some fun...."
Ak wanders past a mucky rivulet on his sulky perambulation. A seal-like creature with sharp pointy teeth sees him go past and tries to latch onto his pale legs from the edge fo the water. Ak fails to see the bunyip, swinging around a shiny iron gauntlet from his possessions in distraction.
Ak's magical gauntlet connects heavily with the bunyip's face, caving in its skull and depositing the corpse of the foul beast back into the water with a heavy splash that sprays Ak with mud. Ak turns to look and completely fails to recognise what just happened. He heaves a big sigh and continues to sulk. "Stupid water....splashing Ak for no good reason....muddy water fun though...."
Skills and Powers: SKILLS
Strength d8 [ ]+1 [ ]+2
Dexterity d8 [X] +1 [ ] +2 [ ] +3 [ ] +4 Stealth: Dexterity +1 Constitution d8 [X] +1 [ ] +2 [ ] +3 [ ] +4 Fortitude: Constitution +2 Intelligence d8 [ ] +1 [ ] +2 Wisdom d6 [ ] +1 [ ] +2 Survival: Wisdom +1 Charisma d4 [ ] +1 Favored Card: None
"Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!" Ak cries as he's whacked with Poog's strange wooden crutch. "Take stupid shiny thing already! Ow! Ow!" Ak suspects that Poog takes a few more whacks even after getting the cool bauble.
Immediately upon poofing back into existence, Poog jumps on top of Ak and tries to get the Shiny Eye Thing! Fight over the Eye:
Henchman 2
Type: Barrier Traits: Skirmish To Defeat: Combat 13 Each character attempts the check to defeat. The character with the highest result displays the support card Shiny Eye Thing next to her deck. Characters who fail are dealt an amount of Combat damage equal to the difference between the difficulty to defeat and that character’s result. After you act, banish this barrier; it is defeated.
Ak thinks very hard about the woods. The Shiny Eye thing flies away from his head, high up in the air.
The Shiny Eye Thing winks Poog and Ak away from the Woods in an instant. When they recover, the shiny bauble still circles Ak's head.
Skills and Powers: SKILLS
Strength d8 [ ]+1 [ ]+2
Dexterity d8 [X] +1 [ ] +2 [ ] +3 [ ] +4 Stealth: Dexterity +1 Constitution d8 [X] +1 [ ] +2 [ ] +3 [ ] +4 Fortitude: Constitution +2 Intelligence d8 [ ] +1 [ ] +2 Wisdom d6 [ ] +1 [ ] +2 Survival: Wisdom +1 Charisma d4 [ ] +1 Favored Card: None
Ak happily hikes along in the woods, Poog at his side, the odd Shiny Eye thing circling the pallid goblin’s head. ”...because land equals power. And that why Ak make good chief because Ak unnerstand egg o’ nom-noms of being Chief!” Ak has many good ideas.
A stupid longshanks wielding a big club steps onto the path in the woods in front of the two goblins. Ak smirks.
The stupid longshanks swings his club down at the small frail-looking goblin. Ak steps aside then bonks him on the head with his jar of pickles, hurriedly checking to make sure that the glass didn’t crack. The thug falls like a tree in the forest.
"What this stupid bell doing here?" Ak ponders.
Ak comes up with a reason for why the stupid bell is there. Before he shares his theory, he dives out of the way.
Ak says, "It stupid longshanks put bell in tree!"
Skills and Powers: SKILLS
Strength d8 [ ]+1 [ ]+2
Dexterity d8 [X] +1 [ ] +2 [ ] +3 [ ] +4 Stealth: Dexterity +1 Constitution d8 [X] +1 [ ] +2 [ ] +3 [ ] +4 Fortitude: Constitution +2 Intelligence d8 [ ] +1 [ ] +2 Wisdom d6 [ ] +1 [ ] +2 Survival: Wisdom +1 Charisma d4 [ ] +1 Favored Card: None
Ak follows his tribe-mates to the dark woods, staring directly into the shiny eye as he walks, barely looking up until he bumps into something solid.
"AHHHHHH! DRAGON!!!!!!!" Ak shouts at the not-dragon, seeing it for the first time.
Before any of the others can react, Ak stabs at the lizard multiple times. He stabs the ground and a tree stump multiple times as well, but fortunately stabs the lizard enough to kill it.
A human wielding a pike comes crashing through the forest at the pallid goblin. Thankfully, his ranger friend with the cool hat dashes in front of Ak and races off, distracting the stupid human and causing him to run off through the woods. "Stupid human! Xoff lose him like Ak lose fleas!" Ak itches irritably at his backside.
Skills and Powers: SKILLS
Strength d8 [ ]+1 [ ]+2
Dexterity d8 [X] +1 [ ] +2 [ ] +3 [ ] +4 Stealth: Dexterity +1 Constitution d8 [X] +1 [ ] +2 [ ] +3 [ ] +4 Fortitude: Constitution +2 Intelligence d8 [ ] +1 [ ] +2 Wisdom d6 [ ] +1 [ ] +2 Survival: Wisdom +1 Charisma d4 [ ] +1 Favored Card: None
Thanks, Poog!
Ak then steals the shiny bauble back from Reepazo. "Sike! Hahahaha! I fooled you, Reepy! No no, Ak keep this."
Skills and Powers: SKILLS
Strength d8 [ ]+1 [ ]+2
Dexterity d8 [X] +1 [ ] +2 [ ] +3 [ ] +4 Stealth: Dexterity +1 Constitution d8 [X] +1 [ ] +2 [ ] +3 [ ] +4 Fortitude: Constitution +2 Intelligence d8 [ ] +1 [ ] +2 Wisdom d6 [ ] +1 [ ] +2 Survival: Wisdom +1 Charisma d4 [ ] +1 Favored Card: None
Shall I take the Shiny Eye Thing?
Breathing heavily after the tussle over the shiny thing, Ak presents the bauble to Reepazo. "Ak best chief. Best chief know when to give things to people best to use it," he says to Reepazo's shocked face.
Skills and Powers: SKILLS
Strength d8 [ ]+1 [ ]+2
Dexterity d8 [X] +1 [ ] +2 [ ] +3 [ ] +4 Stealth: Dexterity +1 Constitution d8 [X] +1 [ ] +2 [ ] +3 [ ] +4 Fortitude: Constitution +2 Intelligence d8 [ ] +1 [ ] +2 Wisdom d6 [ ] +1 [ ] +2 Survival: Wisdom +1 Charisma d4 [ ] +1 Favored Card: None
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