100+ "Florida Man" headlines.


Homebrew and House Rules


What "Florida Man" style headlines could you make off of your games?

I jokingly said there was a newspaper for a place called Flure E Da, and a player wants to buy a subscription to it.


1. Florida Man wins Olympic gold medal. Has it bronzed.


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You should re-start this thread in General Chat, it will get a lot more people to participate, anywho, here goes:

2. Flure'E'Da barbarian accused of 'Assault with a Deadly Weapon' after throwing an alligator during tavern brawl

3. Flure'E'Da half-elf loses job at local smithy, steals all hammers and sells them for Feydust money.

4. Flure'E'Da guardsman claims local tavern put dirt in his food - investigation reveals it was dwarven spices.

5. Flure'E'Da Wild Elves planning to shoot down encroaching storm with blowguns and poisonous darts

6. Flure'E'Da half-orc gets tired of waiting for blessing at local temple, steals holy water font, rides away on trained dire badger

7. Flure'E'Da rogue tries to rob local gem shop while wearing transparent bag to cover his face, gets identified and caught by sheriff two days later in centaur brothel

8. Flure'E'Da thief breaks into local jail to hang out with friends awaiting trial on charges of 'Use of Destructive Magic in an Alchemy Lab'

9. Flure'E'Da man jailed for painting anti-Giant hate speech messages on over 35 Dire Weasels, dire animal cruelty activists highly vexed and seeking maximum punishment

10. Flure'E'Da dwarf denies charges of Drinking and Dire Boar-riding, stating he was drunk BEFORE riding his boar, but didn't drink during trip home

11. Flure'E'Da wizard casts Waves of Ecstasy inside local brothel, gets kidnapped by prostitutes and forced to re-cast several times every day, barely escapes after months of captivity

12. Flure'E'Da dwarf arrested for stabbing guardsman despite having no arms, victim claims the dwarf's beard is prehensile

13. Flure'E'Da witch admits killing pegasus and drinking its blood for occult ritual, has not discontinued campaign for Mayor

14. Flure'E'Da man arrested for eating elven flapcakes in the middle of busy bridge, causes Merchant Guild over 1,000gp in damages from crashed wagons and carts

15. Flure'E'Da gnome performs "Noon-Dance" on top of leatherworking shop in the middle of day, claims his dance keeps away vampires. "You don't see any vampires in the middle of the day, do you!?! Exactly!"

16. Flure'E'Da monk arrested in local park for practicing "Snake Style" moves on endangered species of hippogryph

17. Flure'E'Da elf arrested for disguising himself in Minotaur costume and attempting to burn down ex-lover's house

18. Flure'E'Da man high on Feydust accidentally asks guardsman for his Feydust Dealer contact information, gets chased through crowded market, crashes donkey

19. Flure'E'Da wizard arrested for casting penis-shaped illusion on forehead of rude sales clerk, claims she was price gouging spell reagents to pay for demonic witchcraft classes

20. Flure'E'Da halfling facing trial for "Illegally Riding A Giant Eagle", claims he had to destroy magic ring by dropping it in ominous volcano to save world from misguided solar angel

21. Flure'E'Da man arrested for assaulting his girlfriend with 2 gryphon sausages

22. Flure'E'Da half-orc bursts into ex-girlfriends delivery room, challenges new boyfriend (human) to ritual combat as she's giving birth, gets tased by Merciful Shocking Grasp spell from doctor who just finished beginner wizard courses at local university


Half orc comes back from unconsciousness heavily wounded....says he saw a light but no tunnel


Ryze Kuja wrote:

You should re-start this thread in General Chat, it will get a lot more people to participate, anywho, here goes:

2. Flure'E'Da barbarian accused of 'Assault with a Deadly Weapon' after throwing an alligator during tavern brawl

3. Flure'E'Da half-elf loses job at local smithy, steals all hammers and sells them for Feydust money.

4. Flure'E'Da guardsman claims local tavern put dirt in his food - investigation reveals it was dwarven spices.

5. Flure'E'Da Wild Elves planning to shoot down encroaching storm with blowguns and poisonous darts

6. Flure'E'Da half-orc gets tired of waiting for blessing at local temple, steals holy water font, rides away on trained dire badger

7. Flure'E'Da rogue tries to rob local gem shop while wearing transparent bag to cover his face, gets identified and caught by sheriff two days later in centaur brothel

8. Flure'E'Da thief breaks into local jail to hang out with friends awaiting trial on charges of 'Use of Destructive Magic in an Alchemy Lab'

9. Flure'E'Da man jailed for painting anti-Giant hate speech messages on over 35 Dire Weasels, dire animal cruelty activists highly vexed and seeking maximum punishment

15. lure'E'Da gnome performs "Noon-Dance" on top of leatherworking shop in the middle of day, claims his dance keeps away vampires. "You don't see any vampires in the middle of the day, do you!?! Exactly!"

24. Flure'E'Da Daywalker Drac. the 3rd sues for libel claiming "I was right there!"

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