Sing me the Song of your People! Filks to celebrate every Ancestry!


Lost Omens Campaign Setting General Discussion

Wayfinders Contributor

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I think it would be fun over the holidays to come up with songs and song-parodies to celebrate all the ancestries in Pathfinder Second Edition. It's okay if we have multiple songs for an a given ancestry (some will be more popular than others) but I would love to see us write one for every ancestry, so they all get a little love. Share your songs! I would love to see them!

In another thread, someone made a comment about how hard it was get a Goloma character as they are rare, averse to danger and are frightened of other humanoids. So I thought that I would make a little song for them, because I figured that any goloma characters must surely be lonely.

♫ Oh Goloma, so many eyes come peepin' out your face!
With your watchful ways and careful gaze
There'll be no holes in your carapace!
Oh Goloma, ev'ry night I'm counting ACP*
In the Mwangi Expanse we'll soon dance
Just as soon as I can wrest you free! ♫

Source: Oklahoma by Rogers & Hammerstein

____
* A joking reference to how long it takes to earn a Goloma in PFS.


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This was written in honor of We Be Heroes, where mighty goblins saved some pathetic longshanks led by Lord Ulthun as undead overwhelmed and ran over their land. It's also in honor of the best goblin play ever that commemorated their victory, written by King Zusgut in Flooded King's Court.

♫ Let's get down to business and defeat undead
We’re gobs! Drop fire on their heads
You're the saddest bunch I ever met
But you can bet before we're through
Ulthun, we’ll make a gob out of you

Flaming like a forest
Ghoulish shish-ke-bobs!
Once you find their center
You’ll slice right through!
They're a brainless, moaning, pathetic lot
And they haven't got a clue
We’ll make a gob out of you

Fierce Mitzi and her goblin, Siathorn
Zusgut our most awesome king
Crimsi trapped tunnels far and wide
Grenek to bold action sworn
Even Ulthun unleashed a mighty swing
The dead can run but cannot hide ♫

[Chorus:]
♫ (Be a gob)
You must be hot as desert mojo
(Be a gob)
With all the force of a fiery boom
(Be a gob)
With all the strength of a raging dust storm
Furious as an unleashed typhoon ♫

♫ Time is racing toward us till the fiends arrive
Heed my every order and we might survive
Apart we’re done, united we’ve won
Will you join our fierce protective crew?
And that's how I'll make a gob out of you! ♫

[Chorus x2]

Source: "Be a Man" from Disney's Mulan


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Pathfinder Adventure, Adventure Path, Rulebook Subscriber

This may be cheating, but I'm just gonna leave this here for dwarves, lol.

Wayfinders Contributor

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VestOfHolding wrote:
This may be cheating, but I'm just gonna leave this here for dwarves, lol.

Thematically that's rather appropriate! Thanks for linking to it!


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For Gnomes, to the tune of Gilligan's Island (or maybe Amazing Grace as well)

♫ Just hide back here and you'll hear a tale,
A tale of a crazy trip
That started from some First World Port
To give that home the slip

No one's sure why we had to run
The histories aren't so clear
But we gnomes still have that touch of fey
And we still hold wonder dear. Still, wondering dear?

The adjustment here was pretty rough,
Golorian living has a cost,
If not for passions and new things to do
To the Bleaching we'd be lost! And suffer color loss

But our folk are tough and lovable, with flamboyant styles
Seeking thrills again
A quest or two
Maybe meddling in some strife,
or traveling far,
Obsessions and crazy plans
Join in and watch a gnome smile!♫


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For Halflings, to the tune of CCR's Fortunate son

♫ Some peoples demand the right to wear a crown
They claim a manifest destiny due
And when they see we're a smaller people
They might want to put shackles on you, Gods!

Irony, Irony, that we're luck's favored sons, oh!
Irony, that it's we, halflings are the fortunate ones!

Some folks charge about -drawn swords in hand
Gods yeah, they fight among their own kind
But while they wake to kinsblood on the floor
Our knives are still clean and shine

Irony, Irony, a halfling civil war was never begun
Irony, that it's we halflings who're the fortunate ones!

Yeah!
Some folks build an empire on lies
Then send their youth into war, Oh Gods
And when you ask them "Do you not have enough?"
Ooh, they only answer, "More! More! More!" Oh!

Irony, irony, our daughters don't slaughter for fun
Irony, that in peace, a halfling feels she's won!

Irony, Irony, that we're luck's favored sons, oh!
Irony, that it's we, halflings are the fortunate ones! ♫


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For Kobolds, the Milli Vanili of would be conquerors

♫ You thought you needn't fear us
You thought we'd be the ones to die!
You intruded from above
ignoring kobold pride!
But in our traps we trust, so you bleed and cuss

You Adventurers can be fools
You should have run away
Now you're losing the game
Shoulda remembered one thing
Blame your loss on one thing!

(Blame it on our reign!) that is coming coming
(Blame it on our blood) That is filled with dragon might
Yes, it is so cool, one day kobolds we will rule!
Blame it on our reign! (Yeah Yeah!)
Just blame it on our destined Reign!

Should've told her you were sorry... (sorry)
Could have said you were wrong...
But no you couldn't do that...
You had to prove you were strong...
Ooh if you hadn't been so blinded... (blinded)

Should have told us you were sorry (Sorry!)
Could have said kobolds are never wrong...
but no you wouldn't do that
Acting so big and strong!
Oh if you had been so blinded (blinded)

She might still be there with you...
You want her back again...
But she just don't feel the same...
Gotta blame it on something... (gotta blame it on something)
Gotta blame it on something...

We might have used fewer traps on you
But to kobolds your backs won't bend
So I guess the ones to blame are you
Wanna blame it on kobolds? (Gotta blame it on someone)
Gotta blame it on someone?

(Blame it on our reign!) that is coming coming
(Blame it on our blood) That is filled with dragon might
Yes, it is so cool, one day kobolds we will rule!
Blame it on our reign! (Yeah Yeah!)
Just blame it on our inevitable Reign!♫

....

They broke past our defenses.. RUN!


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If anyone is wondering, I do play characters OVER 4 feet tall, honest ;)


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Ack. Only now do I see how I left whole stanzas of the original Blame it on the Rain in there :( Sorry about that


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VestOfHolding wrote:
This may be cheating, but I'm just gonna leave this here for dwarves, lol.

I knew it was gonna be Diggy Diggy Hole before I clicked the link.

As for a contribution of my own, consider the following to the tune of the Major General's song from Pirates of Penzance.

I am the very model of a wandering automaton
I've traveled all about from Tian Xia to Absalom
My core can recover with a positive healing spell
But my constructed body makes sleep not very critical
I'm also one who is really quite modular
My heritage can let me fight or snipe or run on all fours
As for my feats, well perhaps I can make you cry
When I shoot you in the butt with the fire from my laser eye!

They'll shoot you in the butt with the fire from their laser eye
They'll shoot you in the butt with the fire from their laser eye
They'll shoot you in the butt with the fire from their laser laser eye!

I can also store a weapon in a hollow in my arm
Or reinforce my chassis to keep me from taking harm
But as I spend a sleepless night waiting for the dawn
I know that I'm the model of a wandering automaton!


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BRB, rolling up a "Godfather of Soul" changeling bard.

Come here, mama
And dig this crazy scene
He's not too fancy
But his line is pretty clean

He ain't no drag
Mama wants a brand new hag


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Here's one for Orcs, based off of a Klingon song from Star Trek: DS9:

Hear, sons of Gorum!
Hear, daughters too!
The blood of battle washes clean
The Warrior brave and true!

We fight, we love, and then we kill,
Then we die with honor, and stand tall with our forefathers
Battling forever, in our people's eternal fight!


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Elves , each wearing a sinatra outfit, step up

The Vourinoi starts, "I like a desert moon, how about you?"
The Aiudeen shrugs but smiles, then sings and asks "I like an ancient tune, how about you?"
An Inverarni takes a turn shyly, "I love gazing at the shrines, when the snow is new"
"I like barbed whips, evil rites, and raiding trips, how about you?" The Drow belts out a LITTLE too enthusiastically and the others shake their heads

"I'm mad about secret books, can't get my fill," The Spiresworn singer's voice carries through the mask
"Providing food for my family, a single shot for a quick kill" The Mualijae mimes a bow motion.
Then they all join in for the finish, though the dark elf has her own lyrics "Seeking the bright ('Savoring eternal night') as time's river flows
And bettering ('seizing) the world may not be new
But We elves like it, how about yoooou?"

Dark Archive

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BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK

BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK

BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK
BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK

BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK
BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK

BARK BARK BARK BARK
BARK BARK BARK BARK
BARK BARK BARK BARK

BARK
BARK
BARK

BARK.......

rough translation:
I'm hungry! Where are the treats? Why are we not going on another walk? I wanna go on a walk! Bertrand is stinky. Amber is mean. Hungry. So hungry. Hungry....


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I posted this elsewhere today, but this also fits here!

♫ Golarian has Halflings
Who just want a snack
And it has Ant Gnolls
With a sharp bite attack
It is has tiny delights
Like Poppets and Sprites!

It's Golarian for the small
It's Golarian for the small
It's Golarian for the small
It's Golarian for the small
(Vine leshies make it a small, small whorl)

There are small Automatons
With gears that click and clack
And sticky toed Grippli
With poisonous backs
Goblins set fire to the beach
So firefighter gnomes do not bleach!

It's Golarian for the small
It's Golarian for the small
It's Golarian for the small
It's Golarian for the small
(Leaf leshies glide with a small, small curl)

There are tinkering Ysoki
With their cheek pouches full
And shadowed Fetchling wisps
That look really cool
Kobolds may look somewhat frail
But they have dragon breath and scales!

It's Golarian for the small
It's Golarian for the small
It's Golarian for the small
It's Golarian for the small
(Fruit leshies have berries like a small, small pearl)

There are monstrous Fleshwarps
With a coating of slime
And cuddly pacifist Shoonies
Who dig through dirt and grime
That's uncommon, rare and core
Though we wish there were more!

It's Golarian for the small
It's Golarian for the small
It's Golarian for the small
It's Golarian for the small
(Lotus leshies float with a small, small twirl) ♫

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