Help me turn a long running joke in my party into a terrifying enemy.


Me and my group have this running gag, I forget where exactly it first came from, I believe it was that someone Misheard the DM and for some reason heard the words "Bone Crusher" Ever since then we joked about Bone crusher being the secret BBEG and whenever we enter a cave we joke and go "As you venture into the cave you hear the crushing of bones in the distance" We've also joked about what bone crusher looks like, Be it anywhere from a bone devil, A large man with a big hammer, or at times we talk about the katana-wielding Bone Slicer, Bone crushers alter ego. At this point, it's inside joke ontop of an inside joke. For my next campaign, I'm thinking about putting Bone crusher in at some point. Thing is I'm not sure what the best way to do that is.

So basically my question is, What's the best way to go about making the myth and the legend real? Help me create a physical body for the Godly Bone Crusher and unleash him into the world to continue his work of Crushing Bones.

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He sounds to me like an Ogre and conjures images of sunder attempts and the body Bludgeon rage power. Nothing talks quite like sundering the fighter’s sword with the wizard.

Bonecrusher is Macho Man Randy Savage but as a grave knight. He is scourge of the land wielding an impacting large great hammer (does huge damage) that Magically for him we wields if Medium one handed).

He travels the lands with a mini undead army of ogres.

Class wise either make him fighter or magus. Spell Combat with that hammer would be scary almost TKP worthy especially with the extra element damage Grave knights already get.

Also if they don’t know better a returning villain

How about you upgrade the joke even further? Make the feared Bone Crusher a small race. Like a Gnome bloodrager with the Abyssal bloodline? That way the are first likely to laugh their balls of to see a small gnome bigmouthing them, but will lose their insides when Bone Crusher starts raging and starts bone crushing.

Give him an oversized, impact club, and he'll crush some bones.

After relaxing in a tavern for a long while the group overhears some trappers joking about "Challenging Bone Crusher". Deep in the woods lives a prosperous and 'friendly' tribe of orcs known as the Gnaw Arm. The tribe are known as cleaver fur hunters and traders.

The two hunters reveal that Bone Crusher is the champion of this tribe and any who wish to marry the chieftain's daughter must defeat Bone Crusher in unarmed combat.

If asked the men will describe the daughter as a "tall blond half orc with stunning looks and an impressive figure." If asked about her faults, they will say her voice sounds like she swallowed a frog, and she is 'wild'. Oh, and the daughter's name is "Alice".

The tribe is only located a days travel from here. When the PCs arrive they are given a warm welcome. The tribe lives deep in the woods in a series of decently built shacks made for large creatures. A few human merchants are currently here negotiating a trade. A feast is planned for tonight and everybody is invited.

The villagers are about half orcs. The chief himself is a half-orc. Some hobgoblins, half orcs and ogres round out the surprisingly racially diverse group.

The chief's bodyguard is an Ogre in what appears to be barely recognizable Hell Knight armor with a ton of trophies from various kills attached to the armor. The ogre is armed with an Earthbreaker that gives off an ominous aura. Surprisingly the ogre also has a well maintained crossbow. The ogre is not surprisingly the champion Bone Crusher.

If anyone says anything even remotely close to a challenge the chief will step in and delightedly shake the player's hand. "Ah! A challenger! Fantastic! During the feast we'll hold the challenge. You know the rules? No weapons, no armor, no magic. If you win I'll let you have any prize I have to give. Even my daughter!" Bone Crusher will excitedly leave to prepare.

Lots of Orcs will take an interest in the players now and will ask all about them, especially the challenger's exploits. The merchants start to get in on the action and run a betting pool among themselves.

And of course, just before the feast is served the challenger is lead to a stone-marked ring. The first person out of the ring, admits defeat, or knocked unconscious loses.

And Bone Crusher arrives. Of course it is the chief's daughter. And she is an Ogre. She is wearing a luxurious long blond wig that classes with her heavy black eyebrows. She has enough foundation and makeup applied to her face that she is wearing a white colored mask. She is wearing a (medium sized) deep yellow velvet dress that is desperately trying to contain all of her. Somehow everyone wishes her skirt was 3 inches longer. With every step the players are shocked by something bright pink appearing from beneath the dress, but disappears with each confident, manly stride. Somehow her brown silk slippers are the lest of anyone's concerns.

Make this girl all fighter and extra attention to grappling attacks. Her goal is to "test" the challenger and see if she like him. Which she is guaranteed to do so. She'll proclaim the challenger "cute as daddy" and promptly pin him. She will then ask him to surrender, and if he doesn't comply she'll non-lethally crush him unconscious.

After Bone Crusher's victory she'll carry off the loser as her "prize" for an "unforgettable night". If Bone Crusher loses, she'll profess her unyielding love and follow the PC. If the player loses she'll make the offer to accompany him, as his fiance.

while Alice is a half-Ogre, she looks just like a full Ogre (use Ogre stats, add character levels to make her a threat to the party).

It's not a cave -- it's a snoozing legendary (they get to sleep when they want) earth elemental, and you're inside it! (The bone-crushing being heard is the digestion of yesterday's unwary adventurers who found themselves trapped in the lower gizzard.)

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