NobodysHome Presents: Trig's Journal: A Trip Through Shiro's AP

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pad300 wrote:
UnArcaneElection wrote:

Let me guess:

** spoiler omitted **


Nightwings are CR14. Lew is saying they can take "the Grim Reaper" himself, CR22 Grim Reaper from Beastiary 5, and you think they're worried about nightwings?

Probably not the garden variety Nightwings (although I hadn't realized the party had gotten to that high a level), but if they can take on one of those, a multiple Tzitzimitl would be needed to be as much of a challenge, and a greater multiple of Advanced Nightwings would also be trouble.

I'm curious as to Trig's classes at this point. ^^ (And for that matter once she reached level 20.) With the others I figure we've a single-class Inquisitor, Arcanist, and Paladin. Trig suffers the same issue most rogues do (even Unchained rogues), which really encourages multiclassing.

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Looks like we hit level 18 right around this timeframe (my Hero Labs file was last updated on September 8, so either she just leveled up or she'd leveled up a couple of sessions ago). Here's the Hero Labs output:

Female gnome cleric of Calistria 2/rogue 14/shadowdancer 2
CG Small humanoid (gnome)
Init +8; Senses darkvision 60 ft., low-light vision; Perception +25
AC 33, touch 24, flat-footed 26 (+9 armor, +5 deflection, +6 Dex, +1 dodge, +1 insight, +1 size; +2 deflection bonus vs. evil)
hp 209 (18d8+93)
Fort +18, Ref +22, Will +15; +2 vs. illusions; +2 resistance vs. evil
Defensive Abilities defensive training, evasion, freedom of movement (constant), improved uncanny dodge, trap sense +4; Immune disease; Resist negative energy 10, positive energy 10
Speed 20 ft.
Melee +1 undead-bane ghost touch holy mithral dagger +21/+16/+11 (1d3+1/19-20 plus 2d6 vs. Undead and 2d6 vs. evil) or
. . cold iron dagger +20/+15/+10 (1d3/19-20) or
. . dagger +20/+15/+10 (1d3/19-20) or
. . mithral dagger +21/+16/+11 (1d3/19-20) or
. . sap +20/+15/+10 (1d4 nonlethal)
Ranged +1 undead-bane composite shortbow +21/+16/+11 (1d4+1/×3 plus 2d6 vs. Undead)
Special Attacks channel positive energy 4/day (DC 12, 1d6), hatred, sneak attack +7d6
Spell-Like Abilities (CL 18th; concentration +19)
. . 1/day—dancing lights, ghost sound (DC 12), prestidigitation, speak with animals
Domain Spell-Like Abilities (CL 2nd; concentration +4)
. . 5/day—bit of luck, copycat (2 rounds)
Rogue Spell-Like Abilities (CL 14th; concentration +15)
. . 3/day—open/close (DC 11)
. . 2/day—feather fall
Cleric Spells Prepared (CL 2nd; concentration +4)
. . 1st—comprehend languages, protection from evil, sanctify corpse[UM], true strike[D]
. . 0 (at will)—detect magic, mending, read magic, stabilize
. . D Domain spell; Domains Luck, Trickery
Str 10, Dex 24, Con 20, Int 14, Wis 15, Cha 12
Base Atk +12; CMB +11; CMD 35
Feats Combat Expertise, Combat Reflexes, Dodge, Extra Rogue Talent[APG], Extra Rogue Talent[APG], Gang Up[APG], Mobility, Outflank[APG], Skill Focus (Diplomacy), Stealthy, Underfoot[APG], Weapon Finesse
Traits - custom trait -, rapscallion
Skills Acrobatics +28 (+32 to move past opponents without provoking attacks of opportunity, as long as they're larger than you, +24 to jump), Bluff +20, Climb +10, Craft (traps) +6, Diplomacy +31, Disable Device +37, Disguise +4, Escape Artist +30, Handle Animal +6, Intimidate +4, Knowledge (dungeoneering) +6, Knowledge (local) +8, Knowledge (nature) +3, Knowledge (religion) +9, Linguistics +9, Perception +25, Perform (dance) +9, Ride +9, Sleight of Hand +24, Stealth +40, Survival +2 (+4 to avoid becoming lost), Swim +9, Use Magic Device +25; Racial Modifiers +2 Craft (traps), +2 Perception
Languages Abyssal, Aklo, Celestial, Common, Elven, Gnome, Goblin, Sylvan, Undercommon
SQ gnome magic, hide in plain sight, rogue talents (bonus feat, charmer[APG], combat trick, dispelling attack, fast stealth, finesse rogue, major magic, minor magic, unwitting ally[UC]), trapfinding +7
Combat Gear bead of force, elixir of hiding, feather token (tree), oil of obscure object, oil of shrink item, potion of cure moderate wounds (4), potion of cure serious wounds, potion of darkvision, potion of invisibility, potion of pass without trace, potion of reduce person, potion of remove paralysis, potion of water breathing, scroll of alter self, scroll of atonement, scroll of blade barrier, scroll of breath of life, scroll of consecrate, scroll of consecrate, scroll of control water, scroll of cure moderate wounds (2), scroll of death ward (2), scroll of delayed blast fireball, scroll of eagle's splendor, scroll of elemental body i, scroll of fickle winds, scroll of fireball (CL 10th) (9), scroll of fly, scroll of freedom of movement, scroll of gentle repose, scroll of heal, scroll of iron body, scroll of lightning bolt (CL 10th) (5), scroll of mass cure serious wounds, scroll of message, scroll of restoration (2), scroll of slipstream, scroll of spell turning, scroll of summon monster vii, wand of align weapon (42 charges), wand of bear's endurance (41 charges), wand of cure light wounds (5 charges), wand of cure moderate wounds (37 charges), wand of death ward (50 charges), wand of disguise other (50 charges), wand of fly (33 charges), wand of invisibility (18 charges), wand of lesser restoration (46 charges), wand of mirror image (50 charges), wand of shield (24 charges), wand of silence (48 charges), wand of spider climb (28 charges), acid (2), alchemical glue[UE], alchemical glue accelerant[UE], alchemical grease[APG] (13), alchemist's fire (8), antiplague[APG] (10), antitoxin (10), caltrops, durable arrow (20), foaming powder[UE], holy water (7), liquid ice[APG] (5), smoke pellet[APG] (2), smokestick, tanglefoot bag, vomit capsule[ACG] (11); Other Gear +5 deathless glamered shadow mithral chain shirt, +1 undead-bane composite shortbow, +1 undead-bane ghost touch holy mithral dagger, cold iron dagger, dagger (3), mithral dagger, sap, bead of newt prevention[UE], belt of physical might +6 (Dex, Con), boots of elvenkind, boots of the winterlands, campfire bead[APG], circlet of persuasion, cloak of resistance +5, dusty rose prism ioun stone, elixir of vision, gloves of reconnaissance[UE], handy haversack, headband of mental prowess +2 (Wis, Cha), immovable rod, insistent doorknocker[UE], ioun torch ioun stone[APG], periapt of health, portable hole, raucous canard[UI], ring of freedom of movement, ring of protection +5, ring of sustenance, traveler's any-tool[UE], wayfinder[ISWG], bedroll, cards[UE], chalk (8), city savior medal, clownish makeup (0.5 lb), colored handkerchiefs (0.5 lb), entertainer props, simple (0.5 lb), flint and steel, gnome trail rations[UE] (13), grappling hook, hammock[UE], hemp rope (50 ft.), juggling balls (0.5 lb), marbles[APG], masterwork thieves' tools, mess kit[UE], mirror, piton (5), poison pill ring[UE], pot, silver holy symbol of Calistria, sunrod, tindertwig (5), waterskin, indulgence for illegal entering in logas (worth 100 gp), tapestry with silver circle for spell stitching (worth 100 gp, 5 lb), 8,957 gp, 5 sp
Special Abilities
Bit of Luck (5/day) (Sp) Target takes the higher of 2d20 for a d20 roll.
Charmer (3/day) (Ex) Can roll 2d20 for Diplomacy check and take the better result.
Cleric Channel Positive Energy 1d6 (4/day, DC 12) (Su) Positive energy heals the living and harms the undead; negative has the reverse effect.
Cleric Domain (Luck) Granted Powers: You are infused with luck, and your mere presence can spread good fortune.
Cleric Domain (Trickery) Granted Powers: You are a master of illusions and deceptions. Bluff, Disguise, and Stealth are class skills.
Combat Expertise +/-4 Bonus to AC in exchange for an equal penalty to attack.
Combat Reflexes (8 AoO/round) Can make extra attacks of opportunity/rd, and even when flat-footed.
Copycat (5/day) (Sp) Create a single mirror image duplicate
Darkvision (60 feet) You can see in the dark (black and white only).
Defensive Training +4 Gain a dodge bonus to AC vs. monsters of the Giant subtype.
Dispelling Attack (Su) Your sneak attacks attempt to dispel the target's active spells.
Energy Resistance, Negative energy (10) You have the specified Energy Resistance against Negative Energy attacks.
Energy Resistance, Positive energy (10) You have the specified Energy Resistance against Positive Energy attacks.
Evasion (Ex) If succeed on Reflex save for half dam, take none instead.
Fast Stealth (Ex) Move at full speed while using the Stealth skill at no penalty.
Gang Up You are considered to be flanking your target if two allies threaten that target
Gnome Magic Add 1 to the DCs of any saving throws to resist illusion spells cast.
Hatred +1 Gain a bonus to attack vs. goblinoid/reptilian humanoids.
Hide in Plain Sight (Su) Can use Stealth even while observed, if there is a shadow in 10 ft.
Immunity to Disease You are immune to diseases.
Improved Uncanny Dodge (Lv >= 20) (Ex) Retain DEX bonus to AC when flat-footed. You cannot be flanked unless the attacker is Level 20+.
Low-Light Vision See twice as far as a human in dim light, distinguishing color and detail.
Major Magic (Feather Fall, 2/day) (Sp) Gain the chosen 1st-level spell as a spell-like ability.
Minor Magic (Open/Close, 3/day) (Sp) Gain the chosen cantrip as a spell-like ability.
Mobility +4 to AC vs. AoO provoked by moving out of or through a threatened area.
Outflank Increase flank bonus by +2 if flanking ally has same feat. If you crit, ally gets an AoO.
Sneak Attack +7d6 Attacks deal extra dam if flank foe or if foe is flat-footed.
Trap Sense +4 (Ex) +4 bonus on reflex saves and AC against traps.
Trapfinding +7 Gain a bonus to find or disable traps, including magical ones.
Underfoot +4 Acrobatics to move past opponents withou AoO if they are larger than you. +2 to Mobility if the opponent is larger than you.
Unwitting Ally (Ex) As a swift action, opposed Bluff check to treat foe as ally for flanking.
Trigonomopherianogglepatrix Belmafoodleptock was born in a happy tumble in Umok. Unfortunately, her parents died during the goblin wars and she was taken in as an orphan by the Church of Asmodeus.

Unfortunately for the Church of Asmodeus, that is.

The paladin of Erastil who found her among the ruins knew that he could not care for her, yet knew that turning her over to an Asmodean orphanage would doom her to a life of servitude and cruelty. So, he "negotiated" with the church. They would actually do their jobs, and raise her and educate her, only "disciplining" her as appropriate and not on a whim, and giving her her freedom when she came of age. While this did not sit well with the clergy, they HAD agreed to open orphanages, and nothing the paladin asked for was outside of the scope of their charter, so, reluctantly, they took the young gnome in.

She was as much trouble as a young gnome would be expected to be; no more, no less. Sneaking about the church after hours, stealing extra food for herself or her fellow orphans, getting into places she shouldn't and out of places she should have been, all were fairly expected by the clergy, and their half-hearted attempts at discipline only lacked fervor because they knew gnomes, and knew that she wouldn't change. So they attempted to at least instill in her a sense of gratitude towards the church, such that once she was on her own she might send some of her earnings back to them.

That didn't work either, so the moment she was of age they gave her the appropriate gear as a going-away present, and asked her to kindly never return. It was a promise she was sure she could keep.

Sword at her hip, backpack on her back, Trig set forth in search of adventure, to make her fortune and live an interesting life. She'd heard that Haugin's Ear was a good place for starting adventurers, so she boarded a river boat and headed off for adventure!

^Interesting -- from hearing her account, I would have put her at lower Intelligence and Wisdom but higher Charisma.

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No Dampen Presence as a rogue talent! Wow!

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pad300 wrote:
No Dampen Presence as a rogue talent! Wow!

We don't allow Player Companions of any sort in any game.

If you ever want to ask, "Why?", just turn on Champions of Purity in Hero Labs without telling your players.

Every spell, feat, and trait will come out of that one book.

Says about all you need to know about how well balanced they are.

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Session 54, Played 15-Sep-2019

So, the big question was, "What were we going to do?"

And the answer was, "A whole lotta nothin'!"

And I say that with all due affection, but I was askin' whether we were goin' to go out so I should stay all ready, or whether we were goin' to go up to the inn rooms so I could see how bouncy the beds were and how sticky the ceilings were 'n' how hot 'n' swimmable the baths were 'n' all the important stuff like that, but instead we were just sittin' there at our table watchin' all the other groups plan their moves. But Alembic pointed out that it wasn't all random at all: Each group would meet up, set out, come back in a couple of hours, 'n' then the fighter-types who didn't need to rest would find another group 'n' join up with 'em. It was all very chummy 'n' bizarre at the same time. Alembic, bein' the curious sort, decided to ask Terese 'stead of just makin' stuff up like I would.

So, it turned out that the whole thing was all twisted and logical and sensible and whimsical so everyone from a lawful soldier to a chaotic gnome could appreciate it: You rented a room from Adele (I figure that must've been the name of the guy in front, 'cause I didn't recognize it) or Terese, 'n' they'd keep your stuff safe while you were gone. 'Cept if you didn't come back, your party'd get it. Except that led to murder by party member, so they learned to give the gear to the previous party you'd been with. That way, every group had a vested interest in seein' their own get home, 'n' everyone wanted to travel with someone else every trip in the hopes o' gettin' a jackpot. Chaotic, organized, and interestin'! I liked it! O' course, there were groups like us that were always together, but they tended to be the "elite" and "rich" groups who lived in houses up in the rich area o' town (right against the wall farthest from the provin' grounds) 'n' were gone for weeks at a time, but none o' those sorts ('cept us, apparently) frequented the tavern here. Most o' the groups in the tavern came back every night, 'cause it was too dangerous to camp out in the plains, 'n' socialized 'n' made new groups 'n' headed out again unless they needed rest.

After all that, our group was finally ready to head out 'n' check out the plains, which was kind o' disappointin', 'cause I was lookin' forward to puttin' a dagger or three in Liff, but considerin' what ol' Farbridge had said (the soldier, not Alembic), Liff probably wasn't the real problem so stabbin' him'd accomplish very little 'cept makin' me feel better. But there was that.

Anyhoo, we went out to the square by the gates 'n' Alembic started summonin' some magic horses for us, 'n' I asked for a big white one with a long flowing mane. 'N' all the people 'round us started mockin' him for bein' so high-n-mighty-n-powerful, 'n' I might've joined in a little, 'cept then my horse started lookin' a bit urine-colored 'n' its mane 'n' tail started gettin' shorter so I shut up. A beggar called me over, 'n' I knew Llew didn't like me wanderin' off 'n' gettin' into trouble without tellin' her I was doin' it, so I checked in with her 'n' then talked to the beggar. He was obviously one o' the folk who couldn't do much of anythin' so he was all gaunt 'n' withered like someone who'd been lyin' around livin' off a Ring o' Sustenance for many years without actually exercisin' or anything, so once again I patted my Ring o' Freedom o' Movement fondly, and my belly as well. He didn't notice. He told me that Alembic was too powerful, so I shouldn't trust him. I gave him a gold piece, 'cause I figured it was entertaining information at the least, 'n' the guy didn't seem like a bad sort 'n' could probably use a meal. Then he told me not to trust anyone. I was convinced I'd finally found a good soul down here, so I called Llew over to try to Detect Good on him, but she didn't want to, so instead I gave him another gold piece. I figured either he'd eat like a king for a few days, or he'd be murdered for his money. In the former case, I'd be happy. In the latter, I'd follow my goddess and wreak horrible vengeance. Win-win!

I tried to do a few little pratfalls while gettin' on my horse to loosen up the crowd, but all I got were a couple o' chuckles. Practice, my dear. Practice. We rode on out, 'n' the plains were just as bad as everyone'd said. There were constant battles with skeletons 'n' zombies near the gates, but they were obviously "practice" battles with new adventurers gettin' helped out by more experienced ones 'til they could make it on their own. Just like nobody had horses, nobody had Darkvision, either, so all the groups were carryin' torches around and makin' themselves really obvious to any undead that were around. Nobody looked like they needed or wanted our help, so we moved on.

As we got deeper into the plains, the signs of torchlight got fewer 'n' farther between, 'n' we started hearin' battles in the darkness, meanin' at least some o' the parties had some way o' seein' out there. We heard one o' those giant warsworn thingies moving about, 'n' we knew it was way out of the league of the guys who were here, but it seemed to be goin' slow enough 'n' loud enough that most o' the parties'd be able to avoid it. 'Cept Forth wanted to kill it, 'cause random paladin reasons I didn't understand. Llew agreed, but at least Llew's easy to read: It was a big powerful undead, 'n' we could kill it easily enough without breakin' a sweat, makin' the area safer for the less-experienced adventurers.

We moved closer to it 'n' started buffing and "it" became "them" as a second one came up. About a hundred suits of old armor flew up off the ground 'n' started tryin' to pound Forth silly, but he gets hit harder in the head every morning to get himself out o' bed. So I just kind o' giggled. This was going to be silly. Alembic, bein' a wally kind o' guy, put up a wall o' lava in front o' the farther one. I was impressed! Not only was it somethin' new and cool (in a hot way), but I could see it so I wouldn't run into it! Nice one, Alembic! Llew was waitin' for something sensible to happen, but then Forth made us all Smite-y, includin' me, so that wasn't gonna happen.

Takin' the hint, I flew towards the far one 'til I could see it, smote it (tingly!), then flew back to the closer one, winked out, 'n' hid behind it. I don't know whether it could sense me or not, but it ran off towards Forth 'n' Llew, 'n' I didn't want to give away my position 'cause I wasn't fully defensive yet, so I just let it go. Alembic had his wall barf lava all over the ground. Why? I have no idea. I guess it was intimidatin' or somethin'? Then they decided they were tired o' livin' 'cause one of 'em did the armor-throwin' thing on Llew. Yeah, on Forth it's funny. On Llew it's, "Time to die now."

To add injury to insult, the other one ran around in a crazy circle, catchin up Llew 'n' Forth in its swarmin' parts 'n' knockin' 'em both to the ground.

Eeew. These things were gonna die. Hard. Sure enough, while Alembic was castin' a bunch of invisible stuff 'n' makin' me worry 'bout flyin' around (he even turned himself invisible, the pest!), Llew 'n' Forth killed the first one. 'Cause Llew. I had a chance to look over 'n' see all these flyin' swords chasin' Alembic all over the place. Guess that's why he turned invisible. They weren't more'n minor pests to the rest of us, 'n' I might've had a cut or two from 'em, but they were easy enough to ignore to go after bigger prey. For Alembic, even shaving's a life-or-death ordeal for him, so I figured he was doin' whatever he could to avoid the swords.

Fortunately, Alembic was bein' nice today, so he warned me 'bout the invisible wall 'n' how tall it was, which was helpful 'cause I'd seen the swords bumpin' 'gainst it but I didn't know how high I'd need to fly to get over it. So I went over 'n' smote on the remainin' one 'n' it felt good. Alembic made some more lava spew out o' the wall 'n' I was beginnin' to think that maybe, just maybe, he didn't know what the heck he was doin'. Forth 'n' Llew joined up with me 'n' we made short work o' the other warsworn, but those blades were really desperate to cut up Alembic, so I kind o' forgave him his cowardice… this time. One o' his lava spews even hit the last warsworn before it died, so I was pretty impressed overall.

Since we were all a little cut up, I asked Llew whether I should channel to see whether it attracted the Mother o' Wight's attention 'n' brought her to us right away. She gave me one o' those glares 'n' said, "No."
I started arguin', as is my wont, 'n' she asked me why I'd asked if I was gonna do it anyway. Er… gnome?
'Cept all the warsworn dumped hundreds o' pounds o' armor 'n' weapons on the ground that they could probably use back in the city, so Forth had me roll out my portable hole 'n' we shoveled it all in. At the end of it, Forth just walked up among us 'n' channeled.

It nearly killed me, but I didn't laugh. 'Cause I could see the look on Llew's face, 'n' I'd've died if I'd laughed.

So, our horses'd been wiped out some time durin' the fight, which is kind o' normal, so Alembic made us new ones 'n' we flew on, for hours 'n' hours, 'til we were getting near the end o' the plain. The story was pretty much the same: Sources o' light were rarer 'n' rarer, 'n' fights were bigger 'n' louder, so we were gettin' into "more experienced parties" territory.

Suddenly, Llew's horse disappeared! Just like that! We were ridin' along, then she was just floatin' there in the air like a big vengeful balloon o' violence. We figured we were in for somethin' nasty, so we started buffin' 'n' Llew put up her big, "Don't die from undead field," which was good, 'cause right then half a dozen shadows appeared all around us 'n' started touching us. Kind o' tickled, but not much else, 'cause Llew, but there was somethin' massive movin' off in the distance that'd summoned the shadows (shadows don't just appear. I know that, 'cause I'm one of 'em. Sort of). Alembic Hasted us 'n' Forth channeled. I tried to use my shiny new Thorn on one o' the shadows, but my horse didn't want to listen to me 'cause Alembic'd created it 'n' it probably had some resentment issues. Llew had no such issues 'n' killed two of 'em right out, so they decided that summoned or not they weren't sticking around for that 'n' ran away into the ground.

So o' course somethin' popped all the rest of our horses, 'n' Forth 'n' I fell to the ground. Alembic made us fly 'n' Forth got away from the ground as fast as he could, but I figured someone had to be the bait so I put Death Ward on myself, then flapped up only a few feet 'n' started callin' out for help like a feeble little bird. If they could resist that, they weren't the vicious life-stealin' undead I knew they were. 'Cept it wasn't the shadows that came out o' the ground, it was some giant worm! Its huge maw was bigger'n the house I grew up in, but it miscalculated when it was openin' its mouth so it just kind o' knocked me out o' the way as it rushed past me, 'n' I ended up just lookin' at the side of a giant clumsy angry worm. Worked for me.

Llew called out that it was a night crawler. I started to argue that my daddy was a fisherman and that was NOT, in fact, a night crawler, or else I was REALLY happy that my daddy had killed as many as he had. 'Cept Llew, so I got The Look 'n' shut up 'n' listened as we repositioned ourselves. Like other sucky undead, it sucks the liquid out o' you, 'n' somehow that makes you more susceptible to what other undead want to do to you, like shadows. They're incredibly powerful, have amazing senses use cold, swallow people whole, hit for amounts o' damage that'd make even Forth blanch, 'n' have a poison that'll kill you outright no matter how tough you think you are. We needed good silver weapons to hurt it, which worked for me, since Thorn is mithral 'n' holy 'n' all, but I was worried 'bout Forth and all his adamantine. On top of everythin' else, it can use Finger of Death 'n' Plane Shift to get you alone 'n' then kill you.

No fun at all.

Forth made us all smite again, so I moved up 'n' stabbed it, 'n' the smite took, 'n' it felt good. Even better, what with Shieldy 'n' the dancin' 'n' the smitin' I figured I was near-impossible to hit. Sure enough, it came after me again 'n' missed again, Llew kept buffing, 'n' Forth 'n' I started cutting it up. It didn't like that so it breathed a cone of cold up at us, but I was expectin' it so I danced out o' the way and stabbed it some more. Things were goin' great! Then the shadows all surrounded me, hopin' to distract me. Hah! As if that'd work!

Then it bit me.

Ouch. Ow ow ow ow ow! Holy cow, that HURT! It tried to pull me into its massive maw, but my brand new ring saved my life! Thank goodness for eatin' 'n' sleepin'! It tried to sting me 'n' undulate at me, but my dancin' was enough to keep me from gettin' killed by those. Nasty worm! Forth finished off the worm 'n' I killed one o' the shadows, 'n' without their master 'n' with Llew's aura still goin' they were nothin'. I was expectin' Llew to be mad that she'd missed out on killin' the worm, but she was more'n happy to see it dead 'n' me alive, 'n' that made me all warm 'n' tingly inside.

Unfortunately, after healin' me up Forth was pretty tapped out, as was Llew, 'n' we decided we needed to camp for the night. As the only one who needed sleep, I found a little crevasse, showed the party where I'd be in case they needed me, then disappeared and got myself some well-deserved sleep.

I wasn't too far off in guessing that Nightshades would be around.

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Session 55, Played 22-Sep-2019

So, there are nice ways to wake up: A soft kiss on the cheek. A pat on the bum. The aroma of a hot breakfast bein' carried into your room while you stay snug and warm and cozy in bed.
Gettin' hit by Horrid Wilting is none o' those.

So, wakin' up was unpleasant, 'specially since we supposedly had a watch. But whatever was attackin' us was too far out for Llew or Forth to see, 'n' Alembic 'n' I'd been asleep. As Llew 'n' Forth started buffin', I grabbed my weapons, stood up, 'n' used Shieldy on myself. Alembic turned himself invisible 'n' ran off, callin' out that he'd made a wall between us 'n' "it", whatever "it" was. Trouble was, I didn't really believe him 'cause the thing finally flew into sight, 'n' it was a HUGE dragon, but I couldn't tell what color it was 'cause darkvision. But Llew's better'n me 'n' she said it was an ancient green dragon rivener, whatever that meant. Well, it breathed acid all over the place, 'n' even though I dodged the acid there was still a cold draininess to it 'n' I felt all weak 'n' sickly just bein' 'round it, so 'parently "rivener" means "undead so its breath is full o' negative energy". Forth channeled to heal the rest o' the party, 'cause they'd taken the brunt o' the acid, I protected Llew from negative energy with my wand, 'n' she did the same for the rest of us with her, "Don't get hurt by undead" aura.

Alembic made us all fly, but then it hit us with Chain Lightning 'n' everyone else in the party was suddenly lookin' awfully near death, so I suggested that maybe Alembic should get us the heck out o' there, 'cause I knew neither Llew nor Forth'd suggest it, 'n' Alembic was too quick to suggest it, so maybe they'd listen to me. Fortunately, everybody agreed that we weren't in any shape to take on an ancient dragon who'd taken us by surprise, 'cept Alembic 'cause 'parently the Chain Lightning'd been enough to knock him out. Llew ran over 'n' Healed him while the dragon was wheelin' about for another run, 'n' he didn't need to be told twice to get us the heck out of there.

We arrived back in town, 'n' the bum/guide at the obelisk told us that we shouldn't come back lookin' so weak, 'cause it'd make us prey. Well, I was gonna say that I hadn't had time to get out my makeup while we were gettin' out from under the ancient undead dragon, but Llew just thanked him 'n' told me to give him the stuff, so I opened up my portable hole 'n' made him help us get all the stuff out of there. He said he'd put it to good use, 'n' I kind've believed him. We headed for the tavern to get a decent night's sleep somewhere that dragons weren't goin' to show up. Forth said he'd gotten a message from the dragon that we'd failed, but yeah, let us wake HIM up from a sound slumber 'n' pound on him for a bit before he could get his bearings, 'n' we'd see how HE'D do.

Anyhoo, we went back to the tavern, everyone said, "Hi," 'n' we went to our room 'n' I took a proper bath (if you don't want to see it, don't look, Alembic!) 'n' got back to bed. Llew kept watch, 'n' she said that Liff'd come by sniffin' around while were asleep, but she didn't kill him, which I thought was really too bad.

Once we were up 'n' Forth 'n' I'd done our prayin' 'n' such, we started discussin' how to kill the dragon. Seemed pretty straightforward, even if it was a giant undead death machine: Forth'd have us all smite it, Alembic'd wall it in, 'n' we'd shoot the living (or undead) daylights out of it with bows, 'cause it moved too fast to catch. 'Cept Forth didn't have a bow. Which was especially embarrassin' considerin' I thought we'd just given quite a few over to the bum by the obelisk. So we went back, got Forth a twig with a string, he said he could make it work, 'n' we went by the temple o' Asmodeus to get some scrolls o' Greater Darkvision to help us see farther. 'N' o' course they did their job 'n' tried to recruit me, 'n' o' course I showed 'em I'd been there, done that, 'n' was a gnome to boot, so they didn't take it personally when I said, "No," 'n' didn't even sent me on the stupid, "Hell is great!" boat ride or anythin'. So I got to go in an' buy the scrolls, 'n' the sales guy showed me how to use 'em, which was awfully kind o' him, 'n' I asked him whether he had any spell pages of the spell, 'cause Alembic wanted one o' those. He did, but I'm not made o' cash so I thanked him and sent Alembic in to buy his own darned page.

Once we were ready, we got Phantom Steeds again 'n' headed back out. A warsworn was back, showin' just how useless our efforts to clean out the place would be until the Mother o' Wights was dead, 'n' Llew stopped us when she figured we were 5 minutes out from where we'd last fought the dragon. How she knew that, I had no idea, but she kept borrowin' my wayfinder so at least I felt useful. We did all our buffin', with Death Wards 'n' Greater Darkvisions 'n' all kinds o' other stuff flyin' about willy-nilly, 'n' then we headed in to fight the dragon. 'N' it called out that it hadn't expected us to buff so much so it wasn't goin' to come out and play 'til our buffs wore off. I was worried for a moment, but then Llew said that that was OK, since she could tell which way its lair was, 'n' we were just goin' to head on over 'n' help ourselves.

THAT started the fight!

We got hit by a Horrid Wilting again, 'n' it hurt a bit again, but next was a Fireball, which was at least somethin' different. I lit up an arrow 'n' flew out to be bait to try to draw it in so we could see it. It worked, kind of, 'cause it flew up 'n' hit me but it was invisible so we couldn't see it. Llew 'n' Alembic got to work makin' everyone on that side able to see, while I put True Strike on my arrow 'n' flew back to the group, waitin' for it to show up so I could shoot it. 'Cept no one thought to make me able to see so I didn't get to shoot anythin', so instead I put some luck on Llew but that didn't seem to help her at all. Then Forth did his smite thing but it didn't include me. And considerin' the look on Llew's face, it didn't include her, either, so we were on our own! It breathed acid on us again, but this time with the Death Ward 'n' the protection from acid it didn't seem to hurt anyone all that much (I dodged it again). On the other hand, Llew 'n' Forth didn't seem to be doin' a lot to it, I still couldn't see it, 'n' it kept flyin' up 'n' biting me, which was beginning to get pretty old.

Then Alembic put up a bunch o' walls between us 'n' Llew 'n' Alembic, 'n' the dragon just hopped over 'n' started eatin' us big-time. Why, Alembic? Why? What did I ever do to you?


Anyhoo, it really wasn't lookin' good for me, so Alembic dropped the walls 'n' Llew, bein' sweet, flew up 'n' started smackin' it properly with her sword. It didn't like that so it ripped her up somethin' awful, 'n' Forth did somethin' to swap places with her 'n' it ripped HIM up somethin' awful. It didn't look like either o' them was goin' to last very long, 'n' near the beginnin' o' the fight the dragon'd done somethin' to Alembic to keep him from teleportin' so me 'n' my Plane Shift scrolls were our last hope, 'n' I didn't even know which plane they went to, 'cause Alembic'd bought 'em 'n' he might've played some bad practical joke on me.

I figured it was better to go out a hero than a coward, so I winced, flew up to Forth, took another hit, 'n' gave him more luck. Llew, bein' Llew, didn't stay down 'n' used my distraction to fly in 'n' hit the dragon. So it hit her 'n' dropped her, 'n' hit me 'n' dropped me, 'n' I got ready to say my apologies to Pharasma…
…'cept all of a sudden I was awake again 'n' the fight was still goin'! 'N' Llew was mad. More than a little mad. So she flew up 'n' started carvin' into the thing, 'n' it couldn't get away from that wrath 'n' she killed it.

I was impressed.

Turned out that Alembic'd used a Wish to bring us back.

I was impressed again.

We made sure the dragon was dead, got a couple o' rings and an amulet off of it, Forth healed the little damage it'd done after Alembic's Wish, 'n' we headed over to its lair, 'n' picked up some gold.

If this was the kind o' critter we were goin' to be fightin' from here on out, we were goin' to need some bigger weapons...

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Holy smokes. Burning a Wish to keep the party alive! That... that is impressive and shows just how nasty that fight was!

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Tangent101 wrote:
Holy smokes. Burning a Wish to keep the party alive! That... that is impressive and shows just how nasty that fight was!

It was seriously godawful tactics on the part of Alembic's player. The reason Pathfinder dragons aren't scary is because between Haste, Mass Fly, Aura of Justice, and Dimension Door you have 2-3 front-line fighters Smiting Evil and full-round attacking the dragon and it's all over within a round. In our Rise of the Runelords game, Karzoug got off his first round of spells and buffs (including the Time Stop), but then the bard put the Hasted barbarian and paladin in flanking position and he took on the order of 583 points of damage before he got another action.

Instead of putting the fighters next to the dragon (which would have put him in danger), Alembic inexplicably put up a Force Wall that trapped Trig, Alembic, and the dragon on one side, and Forth and Llew on the other. To make matters even worse, he also played Forth and he moved before invoking Aura of Justice so he missed both Llew and Trig with it.

When your sorcerer isn't getting your fighters into position and your paladin isn't buffing the other party members, you're going to have issues in every fight.

There were "angry" words exchanged after the session as to just how poorly Alembic and Forth had performed...

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Session 56, Played 06-Oct-2019

So, Alembic said he was pretty tapped out, 'n' it didn't seem likely that any critters were likely to come huntin' in the dragon's lair, so we figured it was a good place to get some shut-eye. We tried to rest again, 'n' this time we didn't get wilted or eaten or anything! Miracles DO happen!

In the "morning", after Forth 'n' I'd done our prayers 'n' Llew'd done whatever it is that she does with Pharasma, Alembic summoned up some Phantom Steeds for us. I asked him to make mine rainbow, 'n' he said he did, but in the dark everythin' was just shades o' grey, but it sure looked rainbow to me, so I was happy. We started ridin' 'cross the lands that were labeled "Factories/Necromancers" on our map, so we figured we were probably lookin' for some kind o' place where necromancers manufactured undead critters. The ground was a lot cleaner than it'd been in the Proving Grounds, 'n' Llew 'n' Forth figured that was probably because they needed all the parts for their "factories". I figured it just meant not many people made it this far, 'n' we were better 'n the rest of 'em. It doesn't hurt to be honest!

It only took 'bout an hour of riding on the steeds before we first heard, 'n' then saw one o' the factories in front of us. 'N' it looked just like the one in Gillamoor, but much, much, MUCH bigger! Just as we suspected, the Mother o' Wights'd taken everything she'd learned from all her plottin' 'n' schemin' 'n' was puttin' it all to good use here in her own little domain. The closest buildin' was churnin' out skeletons as far as the eye could see (which wasn't far in the darkness), 'n' the moment Forth asked where they were gettin' all their supplies a warsworn came rumblin' up 'n' dumped its load in the factory. THAT'S where the parts came from!

Now, I'm a sensible girl: We were after the Mother o' Wights. This factory might've been an abomination that needed to be destroyed on Golarion, but in here it was just addin' to the already-overwhelmin' sense o', "This whole place just needs to be destroyed 'n' transported to the Plane o' Positive Energy for some fun cleansin'." So I suggested we just ignore the factory 'n' go around. I was pretty flabbergasted when both Llew 'n' Forth agreed with me. I wish I knew more 'bout people, 'cause I was beginnin' to think they'd been replaced by pod people. But they made the same arguments I did: The Mother o' Wights was our primary target, 'n' there was no reason to get distracted here 'cause we could always come back and raze this place once she was dead. Trouble was, there wasn't a heck of a lot of "around" to go to; the buildings stretched on for as far as the eye could see (not far) or the ear could hear (a lot farther) in either direction. We decided we'd just cut over one o' the buildings, avoidin' the alleyways, 'n' hope nobody with any sense looked up.

No such luck.

We weren't even halfway 'cross the buildin' before a siren started crankin' up 'n' we tried to run for it. Llew 'n' Forth said it wasn't workin' 'n' something big 'n' fly-y was comin' our way, 'n' Llew put up her field to protect us from death effects. Which sounds a lot more powerful'n it is, even though it's awfully powerful, 'cause it doesn't actually protect you from dyin', just from people usin' spells 'n' negative channeling and that kind o' thing to kill you. Since she was worried 'bout such things, I used my wand (which I've taken to carryin' 'stead o' Shieldy, 'cause nobody ever swings at me any more, they just cast Horrid Wilting 'n' try to make me die from a distance) to Death Ward Forth, figurin' he'd want to run off on his lonesome and bleed on someone some time soon.

Alembic was the first one to see it, 'cause he had his super-special Darkvision up, but his description of "giant rocky skeleton thing with gases comin' out" didn't do Llew any good at all. Whatever it was, it hit Forth with some kind of electric beam thingy 'n' it looked like it hurt a lot, but he didn't bleed a whole ton, so I didn't know whether that was good or bad: Did he not bleed 'cause it didn't hurt, or did he not bleed 'cause it was electricity? I didn't think Forth'd like havin' that discussion right now, so I let it drop. I'd probably forget to ask later. Llew was still buffin' herself before goin' in (which is probably why she doesn't bleed as much as Forth does), so I figured it'd help if we could all see what we were fightin', so I used my little gnome brain to create four little balls o' light (red, green, blue, and purple), 'n' the first thing I noticed was that my horse wasn't rainbow at all! It was just a bunch o' shades o' grey!

Alembic! That liar!

Anyhoo, I sent the Dancin' Lights off to light up the critter, 'n' once Llew saw it she immediately said it was a "Zit Middle", which sounds really nasty any way you think about it, but it didn't look like an ooze or pus or anythin' else I'd ever seen comin' out of a zit, so I started wonderin' what kind o' zits these namin' guys had, to name that thing a "Zit Middle", but Llew said that no, it was with a "T", but "Zit Mittle" made even less sense, 'n' Llew just sighed 'n' stopped tryin' to 'splain to me 'cause we were kind o' busy. She just said that it was one o' the critters that was flyin' up high so we weren't supposed to fly over 100' up (I remembered that bit), but this one must've heard the siren 'n' come down to play.

Lucky us.

So Llew warned us 'bout what to do 'n' what not to do: Keep Death Ward up 'cause it could do Wail o' the Banshee at will, don't use cold or electricity, use holy bludgeoning weapons (fresh out o' those), don't use positive energy on it, 'n' look out for its Deeper Darkness spell. As we saw, it had nasty eye bolts, 'n' it could put people in a permanent bit o' stopped time that'd protect 'em, but take 'em out o' the combat. Sounded nasty.

After she was done 'splainin', Forth did his "make all of us Smite Evil at once" thing, and the zit middle (I'm just going to call it a pus monster, even though it didn't look like pus at all to me) didn't like that one bit so it did its eyeball thing at Forth again, so I suggested to Alembic that maybe, just maybe, he might want to protect us from electricity a little bit. He gave me a look that told me he got the point. Good. But I Death Warded him 'cause I figured I could keep up with Llew 'n' she could keep her field up, so we'd be good for a bit yet, and I Smited the critter, and it felt good. (No; the critter didn't feel "Good"; it felt good to smite it!) Alembic protected us all from electricity, an' I didn't say anything rude, 'n' Llew 'n' Forth started movin' in to get at the critter.

'Cept once Llew moved away from me I felt some kind o' horrible miasma around me. I shook it off, but it was pretty obvious I needed to be Death Warded as soon as I had a moment. The critter saw we were comin' and moved away from my lights (but not before zappin' Forth again, but this time he was somewhat protected 'n' it didn't look as bad), but Alembic could still see it 'n' told us to all huddle together. We did, 'n' he teleported us right on top of the thing. It rewarded him by beatin' him near senseless, then eyeballin' him into oblivion. Llew told me I needed to use my Breath of Life on him, so I knew it was bad. Then she just up and killed it. I'm not joking. Some planet-killin' pusball that doesn't look like pus, 'n' she just turns to me 'n' tells me to save Alembic, then just kills it. Just like that.

Never. Make. Llew. Angry.

I tried to make the scroll o' Breath o' Life work on Alembic, but I think it kind o' sensed my feelings about him at the moment, him and his, "Here's a rainbow pony!" but it's not really rainbow, nor even a pony or anythin', so it didn't work. But Forth came through 'n' saved him, so I didn't have to feel guilty 'bout it. 'Cause I would've. Honestly.

We healed Alembic a bit (even Llew's wand was ornery, 'n' in spite of not being supposed to work in this plane it worked both times I tried it) and moved on. After a while, the ground turned to sand, so I made my armor look like a bathing suit (rainbow, of course, and quite modest, thank you very much!) 'n' started singing beach songs, but Llew told me there was no singin' so I had to be quiet. We flew on our horses for a ways, but suddenly they all popped at once. And considerin' mine wasn't really rainbow, I wasn't goin' to miss it all that much. 'Cept Forth 'n' I were fallin' straight down towards a couple o' snakes like the one that'd tried to eat me way back when -- a "hollow serpent", if memory serves. 'N' this time there were two of 'em! 'Cept as we were fallin', we could see more 'n' more down the way: It was an entire fence o' the things! Talk about unfriendly neighbors!

Fortunately (or unfortunately) the snakes didn't want to eat us 'til they'd dried us up a bit, 'cause o' course undead have to do everything backwards and like their food dry 'n' chewy (the abominations!) so they cast a couple o' Horrid Wiltings our way, just to be unpleasant. Llew flew right in 'n' the snake bit her on the way in, but she hit it right back. I figured I was just going to get myself into trouble if I didn't protect myself, so I put up a Death Ward, sidled over next to Llew, 'n' called on Calistria to make a double o' myself. How do you like that, Alembic? I can make Mirror Images, too! Well, one Mirror Image. And it only lasts for twelve seconds. But it's there!!!!
Forth engaged the other one 'n' Alembic sped us up, which is always appreciated. I started stabbin' the snake with Llew, but Forth cheated 'n' smote his so he killed his first. Llew was kind o' pissed 'bout that, but hey, she killed the pus monster so she couldn't really complain all THAT much. The snake tried to eat Llew but that didn't work out all that well for it, 'n' Alembic kept it from runnin' away with one o' those giant walls o' lava. It tried to run anyway, so Llew 'n' I killed it. (Well, I poked it 'n' Llew killed it.)

They didn't have any loot on 'em so we healed up from the Horrid Wiltings 'n' Alembic made us new ponies (and this time mine was rainbow, 'cause I checked and Alembic learns things), 'n' we moved on. This time we were movin' more carefully, watchin' the ground for stuff, so it wasn't a surprise that Llew spotted a faint trail runnin' perpendicular to our path. She could tell everyone on it was goin' to the right, 'n' she 'n' Forth wanted to follow it, but I wanted to see the vile sea first. We argued a bit, then finally I Death Warded everyone 'n' we headed towards the sea. 'N' it got louder. 'N' louder. 'N' louder. 'Til it was nearly deafening. Then we saw the "sea". It was thousands and millions of undead, roiling in a massive pit going on forever, waving 'n' moving like an ocean, but just… an ocean of undead.

Yeah, we weren't goin' THAT way.

So we followed Plan B 'n' followed the path for a ways, 'til it reached a grandiose archway leadin' into an open-air buildin' juttin' out over the "sea". The archway itself had all kinds o' Urgathoan symbols on it, so it was obviously some kind o' monstrosity. I've learned my lesson with archways, so I studied it, 'n' Detected Magic on it, 'n' couldn't figure it out, 'n' Alembic looked it over 'n' it wasn't a trap, it was just some kind o' Silence spell, so we went through and… peace and quiet! All the screamin' undead went silent! It was a nice, peaceful place to rest 'n' relax while waitin' for… what?
At the far end, right next to the edge, was a bell. A ferry bell. So just like all those myths 'bout gettin' ferried 'cross the river o' the dead, 'cept this wasn't a river, this was an honest-to-goodness sea of undead critters. I checked out the bell. Alembic checked out the bell. It was a simple Sending spell to let the ferryman know we were here. Alembic 'n' Forth admitted that they were pretty tapped out 'n' could use a rest, but we didn't want to rest in the ferry building, so we moved off a ways 'n' Alembic built us a little stone hut.

Well, as near as we could figure it'd be around 16 hours before Forth 'n' I got our spells back, though nobody really cared 'bout my "spells" but me, so we played some cards, 'n' I sang some songs in my head, 'n' I juggled, 'n' danced, 'n' put nuts 'n' raisins up my nose and sneezed 'em out at Alembic 'n' such, but just as we were quietin' down 'n' gettin' ready to sleep proper-like we heard some voices outside: Two guys, speakin' in Common, talkin' bout Dimension Dooring in and killing us, or breaking down the walls and killing us, or just waiting for us to come out and killing us. Charming fellows. Forth called out 'n' told them that we didn't want any trouble, but they asked whether we had any loot, so it was obvious they were going to have to die. Sometimes, you make the wrong choices in life. But Forth let 'em wander off, 'n' they said they were goin' to set up an ambush for us, which was awfully forthright of 'em, but I used my gloves to peek through the walls 'n' didn't see 'em, so I guess they really had wandered off to ambush us. Go figure!

So, the rest o' the party isn't as vengeful or bloodthirsty as I am (I figured once they said they were goin' to kill 'n' loot us it was kind o' my religious duty to hunt 'em down 'n' kill 'em, but I'm kind of a slacker of a priestess. 'N' Calistria knows it, 'n' I don't think she cares all that much. 'Cause whatever). Instead o' searchin' for the ambush 'n' fighting the guys, we just Dimension Doored to the bell 'n' Forth had me ring it. Forth 'n' Alembic asked where I went, 'n' Llew asked why I was all translucent. I couldn't figure it out, but Alembic said it looked like I'd gone "ethereal". We figured this was part o' the process so we all rang the bell, 'n' then we didn't have time to experiment 'cause the creepy skeletal boatman showed up just like he's s'posed to 'n' asked me what I wanted, 'n' I told him I wanted to go across the sea, 'n' he said I'd have to pay the toll.
I've learned my lesson, so I asked him exactly what everythin' entailed, 'n' it sounded easy enough: 2 coins from each of us. But he couldn't take us in the state we were in.


Then Alembic mentioned that turnin' ethereal hadn't been in the bell yesterday.


Then the 2 adventurin' guys showed up to kill us, figurin' they had Ghost Touch weapons 'n' we wouldn't so we'd be easy marks.

Now that's an oopsie.

Alembic sped us up, I put Light on Forth to create some shadows 'n' hid, 'n' Llew 'n' Forth closed in 'n' started hitting the guys. Turned out they weren't "guys" at all, but giant skin-wearin' undead called ekorshehs (or somethin' like that). Llew said we had to make sure they didn't manage to hit us with both claws. Easy enough! I flew through/over my guy (handy bein' incorporeal, even if my knife isn't), 'n' my guy quickly learned just what a flankin' rogue with a Ghost Touch dagger can do to kidneys, even undead ones. Llew beat on the one I was helpin' her with, Forth killed his, and I killed ours. The boatman was gettin' impatient so we rushed over, waited to turn solid again, then handed over our fares. Llew quickly searched the corpses 'n' brought along a couple o' nice-lookin' swords.

We got on the ferry and headed for our final destination: The Mother o' Wight's seat o' power.

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And yes, a tzitzimitl has 319 hit points, an AC of 35, and DR 15.

Tell that to a fully-buffed, Smiting inquisitor who decides to first-hit crit an undead while smiting.

The damage she did to that thing was just staggering. It was something along the lines of two crits and two hits. The Smite alone did 126 points. And she had a LOT of other buffs up. I forget all the details, but it was the highest single-round damage of the campaign.

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I wonder if the boatman (Thanadaemon?) is going to rip them off? (Probably not by attacking them, since a normal Thanadaemon is only CR13, but by doing some other treachery.)

Well, it helps she's probably at that point what, 19th or 20th level? So yeah, she's going to do hella damage. ^^

This sounds like a truly fantastic adventure you were all on. :)

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I forget whether we ended the campaign at 18th or 19th, but it's only three or four more posts. And yeah, it was a blast, and the finale was appropriately epic, with a final "What does Trig have in her bag?" moment that capped it all off beautifully.

But that's a few more weeks...

EDIT: It wasn't quite as great as GothBard's bard casting Mad Monkeys for the first time ever against the BBEG of Carrion Crown and having the monkeys run off with his cloak.

It was really hard to take him seriously after that.

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NobodysHome wrote:

{. . .}

EDIT: It wasn't quite as great as GothBard's bard casting Mad Monkeys for the first time ever against the BBEG of Carrion Crown and having the monkeys run off with his cloak.

It was really hard to take him seriously after that.

Now this I'd like to see . . . .

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Session 57, Played 13-Oct-2019

Maybe it's just a long history of things goin' "Kablooey" when I start distractin' people or gettin' interested in their work (I know Phil had to throw me out o' his dimension quite a few times 'cause o' that), but I figured when a skeletal boatman's polin' you 'cross an entire sea o' undead tryin' to get at you and devour you, it's not a good time to be makin' polite conversation. Or really any kind o' conversation. I wasn't even juggling.
But Alembic, bein' Alembic, 'n' not one to live up to my expectations even though they're pretty low, decided it was time to be downright chatty with Mr. Dead Boatman. He asked why the boatman did it (he was bound, as would be expected. 'Course I lived in an Asmodean orphanage for a decade or two, so bindin' outsiders to do your biddin' is kind o' part of the basic education, along with reading, writing, 'n' stabbing misbehavers with forks, 'cept you don't get to choose who's misbehavin' for some reason so that was frowned upon). He asked whether the boatman would rather be dead (honestly kind of a fair question). He asked the boatman what we could expect beyond the sea 'n' all that.

Trouble was, I think he wasn't just bound to pole the boat; he was also s'posed to be mysterious 'n' depressin' as all get-out. He kept talkin' about how we'd have to make moral choices, 'n' every choice'd degrade our souls, 'n' whatnot, 'n' I figured it was just like Llew said: We were in a bigger version o' the tower in the woods, 'n' I figured we'd gotten through that all right. Forth hadn't even fallen or anythin'. Yeah, I made some people hate me forever, but I'm sure they deserved it.

Anyhoo, three hours o' metaphysics and morality later, we got to the far shore. By the time I heard it I was almost ready to jump overboard 'n' swim for it, 'cause Alembic's a talker when he gets his mind set on it. And he had his mind set. But the boatman pulled up, 'n' I was sure they were gonna start talkin' 'bout how the dock was a metaphor for the body 'n' the sea was a metaphor for the soul or whatnot 'cept the bell rang 'n' the boatman had to leave. I was thankful that I wouldn't have to listen to any more o' the conversation, but not so thankful that we had guests 6 hours in our wake, 'n' if we took our usual path o' straight-line destruction, our followers wouldn't have much of an issue keepin' up with us. Ah, well, we'll have to deal with 'em when the time comes. I'm hopin' Liff's with 'em. I wanna get a good look at his hands. They don't need to still be attached to his body when I do, though.

I started idly thinkin', as I do, 'n' got interrupted by a voice in my head, soundin' like a chorus o' the most evil people I'd ever heard. And how do you sound evil? That's gotta take work. But I wasn't payin' much attention 'cause he (they?) were sayin' all the typical stuff 'bout me bein' a disappointment 'n' all, and I'd heard that for many years in the orphanage, so it went in one ear and out the other. Llew started doin' that eye thing to tell us to look at somethin' but it's hard through her goggles, but it was enough to let me know that someone we couldn't see was comin', and he probably wasn't friendly. Almost as if he could tell Llew'd pointed him out, he appeared on the dock walkin' towards us, 'n' he was one hot-lookin' gnome. If I weren't in a den of unspeakable evil with a chorus o' unspeakable voices in my head, I'd've excused myself right there and done some Calistrian worship. 'Cept he was obviously part o' the evil, 'n' so I was obviously oh so Not Interested.

The guy introduced himself as Basileus, which I figured took a Hell of a lot of nerve on anyone's part, and I do mean "Hell", 'cause that's Asmodeus's right-hand devil and if there's one thing I learned in school it was not to mess with him or Asmodeus, 'cause even if you thought you were more powerful 'n' them, they'd use their brains to twist you into little horrified agonized pieces, 'n' this guy was really askin' for it. 'Cept Llew said he was the real deal.


Guess it was time to listen politely 'n' answer his questions 'n' not make any deals, 'cause they'd be bad unless there was somethin' they wanted us doin' anyway (like killin' the Mother o' Wights) that they could help with (like by grantin' wishes) while livin' up to their principles an' at least screwin' us over at least a little bit. 'Cause Asmodeus is like that. I figured I'd listen to the deal, not understand it, then ask him why he was helpin' us, 'n' from that I could probably figure out how bad the deal was.

He first looked us over 'n' said that Llew was an inquisitor of Pharasma, 'n' Forth was a paladin o' Torag, 'n' I was a cleric o' Calistria, but a minor disappointment. I figured I could work my way up to major disappointment soon enough, an' anyway, Calistria 'n' I had a gentlewoman's agreement: I was a pretty apathetic worshipper, 'n' she gave me pretty apathetic spells, 'n' we both nodded our heads 'n' said, "Meh," at each other and were happy with the arrangement. Who was he to judge?

Anyhoo, he wanted to make some kind o' divine pact with a human, but that meant he couldn't interfere with any other god's business, so he couldn't deal with me, Llew, or Forth. He turned to Alembic. The deal was pretty simple: We were about to get in a fight with the Grim Reaper (he even showed us some kind o' spell so we could see the guy waitin' for us), and anyone ol' Grimmy killed would be permanently dead without some kind o' divine intervention. 'N' Asmodeus was willin' to be our intervention. For the mere price of acceptin' the deal, he'd resurrect one of us if we died. If two of us died, he'd resurrect us both, but at the cost of Alembic's soul at the end of his life. 'N' if all three of us died, he'd resurrect us, but he'd take Alembic's soul right then. Just to emphasize the point, he showed the "Fields of the Unworthy" with a bunch o' crucified paladins, clerics, 'n' inquisitors who'd obviously tried to make it through 'n' failed. The good news was, Basileus was showin' us the platform on which the Grim Reaper was waitin', so we had a good idea how to get there.

The rest o' the party 'n' their Lawful-thinkin' minds (Llew isn't Lawful, but she can think that way. I can't. It hurts my brain) started discussin' the deal. I figured I'd just bug Basileus 'bout it 'cause devils do like to boast. I asked him whether Asmodeus had a stake in this (he did), 'n' which side he wanted to win (ours), so it was pretty much guaranteed to be an "only a little bit bad" deal. By the time I was finished figurin' that out, the rest o' the party'd figured out the catch: Other'n me, the rest o' the party was mortal 'n' would be dead in a couple o' centuries anyway, 'n' if I couldn't find ways to keep myself entertained I might bleach in three or four centuries, though I was countin' on the world stayin' interestin', which was one o' the reasons I started travelin' young. So Asmodeus'd cheerfully resurrect 'em once they eventually died, they'd die again anyway 'cause old, 'n' he'd get Alembic's soul. Seemed like an awful lot of work for a single soul, but that's the kind of thing Asmodeus does.
As I said, not that bad of a deal. But Alembic didn't like it 'cause it was his soul we were talkin' 'bout, so he refused.

Basileus did the Asmodean thing where he acted all disappointed that "we" had figured it out, but had that smile that said, "Oh, you're going to be fun! I'll figure out a way to trick you yet," that all Asmodeans get once you get the better of 'em on a deal. Which is why I don't make deals with 'em. They get all hurt if you forget 'em 'cause they spend SO much time figurin' out all the little traps 'n' legal whatnots, 'n' you don't care 'bout the law 'n' you stab the little devils they send after you to seek revenge 'n' they get all offended like it's not part o' the game or somethin'.

Anyhoo, with Basileus on his cheerful disappointed way, we discussed tactics against the Grim Reaper. The big problems were his death effects: We couldn't afford to be critically hit, 'n' we couldn't afford to die. I remembered the scroll of Iron Body in my haversack and asked what happened if we couldn't be crit. Turns out we wouldn't die! So Alembic had a spell to turn us all into elementals, 'n' we'd still be able to use our weapons 'n' fight, 'n' then he'd cast Deathless on all of us so we couldn't die, 'n' between that and Llew's Heal spells, a bunch o' Death Wards, and Protection from Evil, we could probably take him. Other than bein' cut to ribbons by his scythe, of course.

We set about makin' it so. Anythin' we didn't want gettin' polymorphed we had to put down, so I put down my dagger, my Handy Haversack, my holy symbol (you never know), and Shieldy. Everyone else put their stuff down, 'n' Alembic started castin' the spell. Everyone else wanted to be earth elementals 'cause they were tough 'n' strong, but I wanted to be an air elemental 'cause they're light 'n' quick, like me. I asked whether I could be a smelly one with a little brown tinge, but Alembic said the spell didn't work that way, and I'm just thinkin' he didn't want to. Llew did her Death Wards, Alembic Polymorphed us, then as we were pickin' up all our stuff he made us all Deathless, then Hasted us, 'n' finally Dimension Doored us to the platform…
...except the grim reaper wasn't there?!?!?

Forth moved forward 'n' spotted him hiding off on the other side o' the platform, so he told us to gather 'round. Llew moved up 'n' I followed 'n' put a bit o' luck on her, just for luck, 'n' Forth made us all smite. The grim reaper ran up 'n' hit Forth, but it didn't seem too bad. Forth smote 'n' hit him, but just once. Then Llew stepped to the other side of him and just tore him to pieces! I wouldn't be surprised if you could find bits 'n' pieces o' grim reaper all over the Fields o' the Unworthy. If he'd had eyes, they'd've been clouded over. As it was, I just stepped in, looked for a bit o' spine pokin' out, 'n' snipped it. He dropped. I worried that Llew was goin' to be mad again that she didn't get in the killin' blow, but she seemed pretty OK with just havin' him dead.

Alembic turned me back into a gnome 'n' we threw the reaper's stuff into my Portable Hole, except for a scroll that had some kind o' entry code on it, but as we were doin' it Forth 'n' Llew reported that all the souls of all the paladins, clerics, 'n' inquisitors who'd died here were finally free 'n' movin' on to be judged, 'n' they were all thankin' us! How nice! As a return favor we went down 'n' got all their stuff, too, 'n' put it in the hole. I'm sure they didn't mind.

There was a road leadin' out o' the fields, 'n' since we couldn't know how long it was, Alembic made us some steeds 'n' we rode for a few hours. Eventually we came to a big ol' wall with a big ol' gate in it. Alembic studied it 'n' said it had an Alarm on it and an Arcane Lock, but I figured we'd just remove the alarm and use the words. I disabled the Alarm, then tried to read the words, but they were gobbledygook to me. And I speak 9 languages! But Alembic said you had to read it all magic-like, 'n' he did, 'n' the doors opened, 'n' an image o' the Mother o' Wights herself appeared, welcomin' us as the first adventurers worthy o' seein' her.

Llew watched intently. Apparently, the Mother o' Wights needed us 'cause her goddess Urgathoa'd put her on some kind of "villain quest", 'n' she needed to face us 'n' kill us fair 'n' square in order to gain some boon.

So yeah, the entire demirealm was created just to get us to come to her. 'N' here we were. And there was someone else comin' just a few hours behind us.

Interestin' times…

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Well now, that's interesting.

I like how your group figured out how the deal was cursed, and also how to avoid the Grim Reaper's abilities. :)

Thank you for sharing this campaign journal, btw. It's been a lot of fun :)

Trig wanted to be a flatulence elemental? Although hey, you never know, it might have worked.

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Session 58, Played 20-Oct-2019

Once the Mother o' Wight's image was gone, we could see past her and into the building. It looked a lot like an Asmodean church, with pews full o' worshippers all neatly aligned 'n' facin' an altar with a couple o' priests on it on the left, but off to the right were two skeletal guys around some big cage with a lever next to it. As far as I could tell, the lever'd just open the bottom o' the cage 'n' drop whoever was in it into the whatever was below, which seemed like an awfully elaborate way to kill someone if you ask me, but religion.

Since we were obviously about to enter a church o' unholiness, Alembic started Death Warding us with his wand, 'n' the clerics just smiled 'n' let us do our thing, like they had all the time in the world to wait for us to kill them. Once we were Death Warded, Forth stepped into the church 'n' immediately his Life Bubble popped 'n' he coughed a bit 'n' said the whole place stank of death. Once he'd stepped in the whole congregation turned to look at him and smiled, 'n' the priests welcomed him 'n' said they were happy to see us all as had been foretold. All the people in the pews were more o' the same: Paladins, inquisitors, 'n' clerics of good-aligned gods, who'd clearly lost their faith somewhere along the way. Know what's better'n losin' your faith? Dying 'n' spending eternity with the god or goddess you swore to serve! How hard is it to die? Sheesh. I've done it twice now.

Anyhoo, dyin' aside, they didn't seem like an immediate threat, nor did the skeletal guys with the cage and the lever, nor did any o' the dead bodies in the chandeliers, or on the walls, or anywhere else (can't they think of anything else to decorate with?), so Forth 'n' Llew started tellin' us what was goin' on. Forth said he smelled somethin' like brimstone over by the skeletal guys, so the floor probably opened up into fire or lava or somethin' else nasty. Llew said the guys guardin' it were ice wights, 'n' they'd be a nasty fight so Alembic protected us from cold. The priests at the front were clerics o' Urgathoa, 'n' they were in the middle o' some ritual where all the parishioners had all gorged themselves on some huge, magnificent feast at the front o' the room, 'n' now they were prayin' fervently to their old gods, 'n' once they were done they were going to eat some rotten human flesh 'n' hope they didn't get infected.

There's a reason I like Calistria. Better rituals.

Llew said the whole purpose o' the ritual was to draw the attention o' the good gods to what the Mother o' Wights was doin', which again seemed like a Really Bad Thing. I asked whether we should kill 'em all, 'n' whether it was OK with everyone else, 'n' the priests cut in 'n' said they could hear me 'cause rude, 'n' Llew said she was OK with me killin' everyone 'n' Forth made one o' those vague statements like, "They've made their choices," which really wasn't a "Yes" or a "No" in my mind, 'cause paladins can be confusin' that way, 'n' Alembic's happy to kill anyone who isn't killing him so his opinion didn't really count.

The priests insisted that all they wanted to do was help us, 'n' they didn't want to fight, so I was kind o' waitin' for Llew or Forth to do somethin', 'cause Calistria's pretty OK with murder 'n' mayhem if you think someone might possibly deserve it (in fact I think she thinks it's kind o' funny), but Torag's a dwarf god, 'n' heck if I know what the heck he thinks. Alembic solved the problem for me by summonin' a couple o' wood guys to attack the ice wights, which kind o' made everythin' go to heck. It looked like he summoned three, but one of 'em dissolved as soon as it came in, so two seemed OK. I got ready to use a scroll o' Fireball on the clerics if they tried anythin', but they seemed more panicked than anythin' else. The ice wights engaged the wood guys, but then Forth went runnin' in 'cause Forth isn't Forth unless he's gettin' beaten on, 'n' Llew started buffin' herself 'n' Alembic sped up everybody but me.

Trouble was, with us in the middle and the parishioners 'n' clerics on the left 'n' ice wights on the right, we were in a bit of a bind. So I blew up the parishioners 'n' the clerics with a Fireball. 'N' they all died. Just like that. Like tiny little twigs in a bonfire. Remember what I said 'bout Calistria not mindin' a little accidental mayhem? Well, I was pretty thankful for that 'cause I was thinkin' a good-aligned god might've taken some offense at that. 'Cept they were all Urgathoa worshippers who'd abandoned their own faiths, so I was planning on killin' 'em anyway and the fact that they were weak as kittens just sped things up. I wouldn't've fireballed kittens. 'Cause kittens.

Forth started getting beaten on, which is always a spectacle, 'cept this time all his blood started turnin' black 'n' icy 'n' flamy all at the same time, 'n' it didn't look good at all 'n' he swung at the ice wight 'n' couldn't hit worth a darn, so I was goin' to have to get involved. And that meant fire. Because it always means fire. Llew went in to help out Forth 'n' I told Alembic to protect 'em both from fire 'n' he did, 'cause sometimes he listens to me, 'n' I Fireballed the lot of 'em. From all the meltin' on the ice wights I think it did a lot of good, 'cept it blew up one of Alembic's trees, which I almost felt a little bad about. But the things were really tearin' Forth up to the point that I was wonderin' whether he'd survive the fight, so Alembic send a snake o' fire through the wights 'n' I Fireballed 'em again 'n' that was enough for Llew to kill one. Forth finally managed to get his wits together 'n' kill the other one, but he was still burnin' so Llew had to out 'n' out Heal him. I stepped into the church 'n' lost my Life Bubble, too, and it stank. I ran over 'cause I knew it'd be hilarious 'n' I Consecrated the church's altar. Take that, Urgathoa! Best 200 gold I ever spent! 'Course I couldn't much tell that it did anythin', but the spell went off 'n' that was good enough for me.

Then it dawned on me: How'd I cast Consecrate when even Llew 'n' Forth were havin' to focus to cast positive energy spells? Llew explained that the aura that made it hard to cast was gone from here. One more sign that the Mother o' Wights needed us in a fair fight for some reason.

While I was standin' there on the now-Consecrated altar bein' all disrespectful to Urgathoa, Forth came over 'n' looked at the priests. Each of 'em had a fancy scroll tube. Once I'd checked 'em for traps, Alembic opened 'em. Inside were instructions to the priests to feed us, bless us, 'n' give us anythin' we needed. They really were tryin' to be helpful. But they were horrifically evil and deserved to die anyway. At least in my book, and that's the one that counts, since I'm the one who blew 'em up.

Llew said some nice words over the dead 'cause she's good that way, 'n' we looked over the lever. It was just a boring old Teleport Trap that put you into a cage, 'n' then the wights dropped you into a lava pit. I really wondered 'bout the person who thought it up: Would a group teleportin' somewhere unknown really not be flyin'? And if they were flyin', what good was the lever goin' to do? Didn't seem like a well-thought out trap at all to me. Maybe later I could improve it.

As we looked around, it turned out the door to the outside had closed at some point durin' the fight. Alembic mentioned that he was pretty tapped out, 'n' Forth was lookin' pretty tired, too, 'n' I figured the Mother o' Wights obviously had to fight us at our best so there was no reason not to rest, but of course the moment I said it sounded like a good idea everyone figured something'd go wrong 'n' we decided to move on. Alembic had his tree guy try to open the next door, but it was locked, so it was pretty comedic watchin' the stupid tree tryin' unsuccessfully to open the door while Alembic was takin' a moment to figure out whether it was 'cause the tree didn't have thumbs or whether 'cause somethin' else was wrong.

So I unlocked the door 'n' let the tree open it, 'cause it was the nice thing to do.

Another image of the Mother o' Wights. *yawn*. This one told us to help ourselves to anythin' we thought might be helpful in the next room, but it was just a room full of holy symbols of all the people she'd corrupted. The door past the room had a plaque on it that read, "My first creations were weak and pitiful." It took us a moment to realize that she was goin' to have us walk through a fricking museum of her creations! Her nefarious plan was clear! She was going to bore us to death!

'Cept I'm a thoughtful girl, so I wanted to collect all the holy symbols so I could return 'em to their rightful temples, 'n' Llew 'n' Forth didn't want to waste the time, but when your gnome's bein' more pious than you it's time to let her do her thing, so we lost around five minutes dumpin' holy symbols into my Portable Hole, but it made me feel better. THEN we went on to see the museum.

Opening the door, we saw four skeletons done up in magnificent costumes, each on a pedestal, and each with a plaque. The closest one was done up as some kind o' female demon, with great wings covered with some kind o' writing I couldn't read, bleedin' glowy hooves, 'n' three tails. The plaque read, "Nocticula, Demon Lord of Secrets". Llew said she 'n' all the others were fast zombies, so they probably wouldn't be all that tough, but the Mother o' Wights'd gone to a lot of trouble to make 'em up. Past Nocticula was a tentacly guy labeled "Dagon, Demon Lord of the Sea". Then a twisted-up giant labeled, "Kostchtchie, Demon Lord of Giants". I made Alembic read the name out loud 'n' then said, "Gesundheit". He wasn't amused. The final one was "Pazuzu, Demon Lord of the Wind". The wood golem wandered up to Nocticula 'n' she pretty much destroyed him. I took a shot at her but missed horrifically, but Llew made up for it by walking up and hitting her but good. Forth moved up to help, 'n' Alembic helpfully pointed out that the other three zombies were Time Stopped 'n' probably wouldn't interfere if we didn't get too close to 'em.

Since Forth 'n' Llew were havin' trouble hitting, 'n' Nocticula was obviously goin' to eventually start doin' some real damage, I tried to summon some lillend azatas to help us, 'cept the stupid scroll didn't want to work for me! Fortunately, Alembic wasn't as bad as me 'n' he slowed the critter down. I gave Llew some luck to help her hit, 'n' I should've given it to Forth 'cause he started flappin' his axe around 'n' sunk it into the wall. Llew hit her for a lot more damage, 'n' she wasn't hurtin' Llew much at all 'cause she'd been slowed. Which meant I had time to go back to summoning, 'n' this time the scroll worked!

Unfortunately, by the time my azatas finally arrived Llew 'n' Forth'd already finished off Nocticula. Fortunately, I got 3 azatas to heed my call, which made me feel really loved 'n' special, 'cause it was the most I could get. Unfortunately, I didn't really have any space for all 3 of them so I had to put one of 'em next to Pazuzu. Sorry, girl! I had two of 'em start doin' their bard thing, 'n' the one next to Pazuzu healed Llew a bit 'cause it was a nice thing to do and I was asking all politely in Celestial 'n' everythin', which made the azatas smile 'cause they have Truespeech 'n' I was just bein' polite. 'Cause azatas. I expect to see a lot of 'em once I'm dead, so gotta get on good terms with 'em now.

Unfortunately, the stinky gas we'd smelled was apparently really bad for azatas, 'n' two of my girls started wiltin' almost immediately. I felt kind o' bad for summonin' 'em in. The one who'd healed Llew said it was OK 'cause I was fightin' a good 'n' righteous fight, just before Pazuzu obliterated her. So I stepped in to stab him, 'cause it was the obvious thing to do. With my two girls performin' Llew 'n' Forth could hit much better, 'cause bards are awesome that way. In fact, Forth out-and-out killed Pazuzu, then Llew one-rounded guy whose name I don't even want to bother to write 'cause too many consonants. Since we were doin' so well, one o' the azata 'n' I started in on Dagon, 'n' he hit me a bit, but not too bad, 'n' Llew 'n' Forth came over 'n' we made short work of him, but not before a second of my azata died from the poison. Poor girls!

I quickly named my third azata Julie, 'cause everyone knows that outsiders with names don't die, 'n' climbed up onto her to ride her just 'cause she was so huge 'n' pretty 'n' I wanted to. 'N' she didn't mind, 'cause she was summoned.

Once Dagon dropped, and as Julie was healin' me 'cause I'd asked her to, another image o' the Mother o' Wights appeared to explain her creations' shortcomings, talkin' 'bout how some of 'em were hard to hit but didn't do much damage, while others did a ton o' damage but were too easy to hit, 'n' so forth. All very boring and self-righteous. 'N' none o' their gear was magical, so maybe the Mother o' Wights bein' cheap in her own museum might've contributed to their downfall, eh?

The next door was labeled "Planes", so it seemed appropriate to have Julie Knock it open. We moved into the next room 'n' it was a giant green-skinned humanoid with wings. Some kind of angel? Can you make undead out of angels? 'Cause that just seems wrong. Julie didn't know what it was, either, so we all just did the proper thing 'n' ran in and killed it. Once it was dead, we saw that the plaque said, "Planetar Angel". So it was an angel! Unfortunately, Julie's time was up so I hugged her goodbye and stood on my own two feet. Or floated. Whatever.

We didn't get the Mother o' Wights this time, but a door that said, "During my trip into the good realms I found even greater things to putrify". Which just made me want to stab her all the more. Who goes on vacation to other people's places just to putrify them? OK, maybe I break or burn a few things, but I don't putrify anything! Or zombify my hosts!
We went into the next room 'n' it was a smaller angel this time, but this one had six wings. It was labeled a "Solar Angel" and it was a bit harder to kill, but apparently turnin' angels into undead doesn't work all that well (as you'd figure), and I'd say the demon lord zombies were tougher than the angel zombies, all in all.

Anyhoo, we got her little sob story 'bout how the Good planes weren't good enough for her, so she decided to try some others 'n' the next door said "Plane of Fire". Which was good, 'cause we were protected from fire. Alembic cast Open on the door and sure enough, there was some kind of fire thing there, which Llew said was an "elder fire ravener plague beast", as if that meant anythin' to me. Apparently it did to Alembic 'cause he panicked and hid around the corner, but I figured the last two'd been cake walks, so I used Shieldy on myself and ran in to distract it. 'Cept instead of tryin' to hit me it breathed on everyone. And its breath stole life away!

I started tryin' to complain to Llew that she should've said somethin, 'n' she pointed out that I'd gotten all gung-ho 'n' run in before she'd had a chance to say "Boo", and I had to admit she was right, but it still hurt. 'N' Forth 'n' Alembic were burned pretty badly by the fire part of the breath in spite o' their protections. Llew warned me I wouldn't be able to find any weaknesses on it, 'n' lookin' at the big blobby thing I figured I could've figured that out myself. But Llew put up her protective aura on us 'n' we started beatin' on it, 'n' I didn't like it much 'cause it wanted to beat me to death 'n' it was pretty good at it, then Forth did another weird fumbly thing with his axe so it decided to eat him instead. Thanks, Forth! Anyhoo, Llew kept beatin' on it 'til a bunch o' spirits started spinnin' round it, 'n' Llew said those were the souls o' those it'd drained, 'n' Forth finished it off. He didn't want to talk 'bout who the last soul was.

Alembic surprised us all by pullin' out a wand o' Restoration that must've cost a pretty penny, 'n' we got all healed up 'n' got all our levels back, but at this point we were well and truly pooped. So we chose the room where the planetar angel'd been 'cause it was nice 'n' big 'n' easy to defend, 'n' Alembic summoned some kind o' cabin, 'n' we decided to go in and rest.

I figured if the Mother o' Wights was goin' to all this trouble to get us to fight her in our top form, she wouldn't try to do somethin' while we were restin'. Would she?

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Resting in a room prepared by the Mother of Wights? I've got a bad feeling about this . . . .

So it looks like Forth had some TERRIBLE rolls in this session, based on the number of fumbles and how he struggled to hit the ice wights.

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Phntm888 wrote:
So it looks like Forth had some TERRIBLE rolls in this session, based on the number of fumbles and how he struggled to hit the ice wights.

I think the easiest answers are:

(1) He usually went to bed with multiple Smite Evils still available.
(2) He preferred a reach weapon.

When you're not Smiting Evil and you're spending a lot of time repositioning yourself, you're not going to hit nearly as often.

Llew was also frequently benefiting from Trig's Bit of Luck. That's a brutal, brutal cleric domain to put on a front line fighter.

Hmmm. I'm surprised he wasn't smiting against obvious undead. I can see conserving them for important fights when you only have one or two, but at high levels, you should have enough to smite the targets that clearly deserve it.

I like reach weapons for area denial, especially if you have combat reflexes and stand still to go with it. It's effective, but if the enemies move around a lot or you can't just plant your feet and stay in one place, it loses a lot of its luster.

I hope Trig saved some of those Bit of Luck's for Forth when he actually was smiting. I can see that domain power being even more potent on a smiting paladin.

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Phntm888 wrote:

Hmmm. I'm surprised he wasn't smiting against obvious undead. I can see conserving them for important fights when you only have one or two, but at high levels, you should have enough to smite the targets that clearly deserve it.

I like reach weapons for area denial, especially if you have combat reflexes and stand still to go with it. It's effective, but if the enemies move around a lot or you can't just plant your feet and stay in one place, it loses a lot of its luster.

I hope Trig saved some of those Bit of Luck's for Forth when he actually was smiting. I can see that domain power being even more potent on a smiting paladin.

He had a reach weapon with no Stand Still and only one AoO, so yeah, tactics were a major issue, but that's a whole 'nother ball game.

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Session 59, Played 03-Nov-2019

As I thought, the Mother o' Wights was all polite 'n' such 'n' didn't bother us while we were nappin', so we woke up all refreshed 'n' ready to kill her. Very nice of her 'n' all. Considerin' that the day before I'd gotten to see my poor azata girls choke to death on whatever it is that Alembic's protectin' us from, I decided I'd better prepare Air Bubble, just in case it happened again, 'n' we spent some time buffin' up.

Once we were out of Alembic's cabin, he summoned up some more o' the wood guys, 'n' I said I couldn't promise not to burn 'em, but he said that was OK 'cause he could always make more. Alembic's a good guy when it comes to breakin' his stuff. Then Alembic made us all fly, 'n' I thought the same thing 'bout the Air Bubble, so I took out Spidey 'n' put Spider Climb on myself, just in case. I got us into the next room, 'n' this one wasn't a museum at all. It was a really nice studio, with a writing desk, a sofa, 'n' all kinds of other furnishings, plus a full-size portrait o' the Mother o' Wights on the wall. There was another image of her at the other end o' the room, 'n' she was sayin' she was impressed with us. With all these pictures, at least we all knew she wasn't ashamed of the way she looked, which was pretty darned awful. Forth went on in with one o' the wooden guys, 'n' the portrait kind o' came to life 'n' started talkin' at him. It was even more creepy than it sounds.

Anyhoo, the Mother o' Wights wanted to know all our names, 'n' was tryin' to be all charmin' 'n' all, but she didn't seem to like me all that much 'n' asked whether I was the entertainment or somethin', so I started juggling for her. It didn't seem to make her any happier. Once she had our names 'n' such she said she was going to make us an "important bargain". Being used to livin' around Asmodeans, I was immediately against it, whatever it was. Well, she told us she'd been tasked by Urgathoa with findin' the greatest threat to her (Urgathoa) in this world, 'n' she'd been workin' at it for hundreds of years, but she was pretty sure we were it. 'Cause first she tried chasing 'em down 'n' didn't get very far, but then she tried lurin' them in 'n' got us. I was thinkin' of arguin' with her that the only country she'd set up was Isger, so maybe she had the biggest threat to Urgathoa in Isger, but I was pretty dubious she'd found the biggest threat in the world, but I figured I should probably keep quiet 'n' let Forth 'n' Llew talk, 'cause their gods cared about bargains 'n' Urgathoa 'n' the like. Alembic was faster than I was, though, 'n' he said we probably weren't that big of a threat, but that didn't dissuade her.

So she started ramblin', as she's wont to do, 'n' we had to listen, 'cause beating on a picture may be satisfyin' but it doesn't accomplish much. As far as she figured, she was done. She'd found Urgathoa's biggest threat, so she didn't have to do that any more, so she was happy to just walk away 'n' give peace to the surface world 'n' let us go. Never mind the tens of thousands of people she'd already brutally tortured 'n' murdered; she was perfectly happy to just leave. Bein' Calistrian, I told her my goddess was one o' vengeance, and wouldn't like it if I just walked away. That actually made her smile, 'cause 'parently she'd thought I was an Asmodean. Which doesn't make any sense at all, so it just goes to show she really didn't know us all that well. Forth, bein' a paladin 'n' all, couldn't decide for himself so he said he'd let Llew choose for him. I dunno; I guess the Asmodeans really didn't know paladins all that well when they taught me about 'em, but bein' all evil 'n' all, maybe they just didn't know. Llew said that her god-given duty was to track down and kill the Mother o' Wights. No wishy-washiness there! You go, Llew! The Mother o' Wights took Llew more seriously than she had me, 'n' she said that if we didn't back down she'd kill "everyone".

I wanted to ask her exactly what she meant by, "Everyone," 'cause that word can mean a whole lot of things. Everyone in the area? Everyone in her realm? Everyone in Isger? Everyone in the world? I might've asked, but once Llew'd made up his mind for him, Forth went off on a speech 'bout why he had to kill her. Would've been downright impressive if he hadn't let Llew go first. She said that if that was the way we wanted it, she was disappointed in us but she'd kill us all.

Whatever. It's been tried.

Our next stop was the next door out, 'n' one of Alembic's golems tried to open it, and a bunch o' huge fireballs filled the room 'n' tried to hit everybody. 'Cept me, 'cause I bet the Mother o' Wights knew I was pretty dodgy. Llew 'n' Forth got burned up pretty bad, so I gave Llew a potion to heal herself while Forth channeled. Fortunately, Alembic'd protected us from fire, or that might've been really bad for 'em. Once they were healed enough, we went into the next room 'n' there was another image of her (doesn't she have anything better to do than set up a walking, talking museum to herself? Well, considerin' she's an undead who's been alive for hundreds or thousands of years, maybe not). This one said that she was irritated with herself for not convincin' us to back down. Kind o' funny, watchin' her get mad at herself 'cause we were stubborn. We knew what was coming next, 'n' I knew I couldn't do anythin' about it 'cause the triggers were always inside the room, so I just opened the next door.

Screaming. Really, really, loud screaming. So loud it tore up your insides 'n' made you need to use the bathroom 'n' throw up and pull out your own ears all at once. Fortunately, it didn't last very long, but ow! Forth started healin' us again 'n' Alembic put up a spell to protect us from loud noises, too. He's got a spell for everythin'! The next door tried to be all fancy with three big expensive-lookin' locks, but she really shouldn't be wastin' her money ilke that 'cause it was easy enough to remove 'em all. Wincing, I opened the next door to see what was goin' to hit me next, but nothin' did. Instead, the room was full o' people all chained up 'n' mutilated 'n' groanin' 'n' everythin' else you expect from the Mother o' Wights. Forth 'n' Llew confirmed that they were alive 'n' they weren't evil, which I already knew 'cause it's the way the Mother o' Wights does things. Obviously, the moment we walked in somethin' nasty was goin' to happen to all those people 'n' the Mother o' Wights would show up 'n' tell us it was all our fault for not turnin' around.

Villains are SO predictable!

So Forth channeled from outside the room to heal some of 'em up, 'n' they looked a bit better. I started lookin' really carefully for any traps that'd go off and kill all these folk, 'n' sure enough there was some kind o' flail thingy on the floor that'd spin 'round 'n' kill them all. Didn't take me long to make sure it wouldn't do any flailin', then Llew 'n' Forth came in 'n' started cuttin' down the people (by that I mean cuttin' their chains to free 'em, not murderin' innocent prisoners), while Alembic kept watch. Forth channeled one more time to make sure they were all healthy, then Alembic summoned one of his mansion things for them to hide in 'til we came back. Llew 'n' Forth told 'em to rest 'n' eat. I told 'em to try the maze. Alembic told 'em to get a massage from the unseen servants, but I don't think unseen servants can do that sort o' thing so that's just cruel, Alembic.

Anyhoo, the next door was a bit more bafflin' to me. I could sense that it was some kind o' teleportation trap, where if you set it off you'd be teleported somewhere (probably awful), but I couldn't for the life of me figure out how to make it stop. Probably my gnome curiousity was battlin' with my gnome sense o' self-preservation, 'cause that's a common thing for us gnomes, but eventually self-preservation prevailed and I managed to disable the trap. 'Cept no one really trusted that I'd done it 'cause they were so used to me doin' it without battin' an eyelash, so I had to unlock 'n' open the door to show 'em it was safe.

'Cept it wasn't.

There was a floatin' eyeball in the middle o' the room that'd been waitin' for someone to open it, 'n' it set off some kind of alchemical frost bomb that tried to freeze everyone in place. 'Cept I'm used to practical joke bombs like that so I got out o' the way, 'n' everyone else had rings o' Freedom of Movement so they didn't get caught either. 'Cept for Alembic's tree guys. They didn't do so well. So it was a good thing he was having most of them hang out at the back, 'cause we were going through them pretty fast. I think he had only one or two left after the blast.

I guess even bored undead would-be world-destroyers run out of ideas eventually. That's my only explanation for the next room. It had nothin' in it! It was like she'd come up with this big plan for a museum tour, an' then a set o' killin' rooms, 'n' then a paladin trap room, 'n' then she'd been tryin' to think of what to come up with next but she couldn't think of anythin' so instead she gave up 'n' just thought, "Oh, whatever. Nobody's ever goin' to get this far so why bother?"

Little did she know!

So Llew was still hurtin' from the frost bombs so I gave her the rest o' my potions 'cause I never use 'em, 'n' I checked 'n' unlocked the next door. This one was a temple to Urgathoa, complete with altar! So I ran on in to Consecrate it, 'n' it tried to do somethin' to me but it didn't work, so I Consecrated the altar first. 'Cause I can keep my priorities straight! Then I checked it for traps 'n' it was doin' some kind o' negative channelin' thing that Death Ward protected me from (thanks, Forth!). So I disabled it, 'cause it's what I do.

I unlocked the next door 'n' Alembic tried to open it 'cept it had some kind o' spring on it that kept it closed. This made Llew 'n' Forth suspicious, so Forth put new Death Wards on all of us 'n' I got out my Immovable Rod to prop the door open 'n' everyone took this door more seriously than the others. It was a good thing, too, 'cause when one of Alembic's last wood things opened the door 'n' I stuck in the Immovable Rod to keep it open, I got bitten by a great big dragon head. And it hurt! Even through Alembic's Stoneskin! That was one angry dragon! I stepped back from the door 'cause I'm smart enough to know when I'm about to get eaten, 'n' Forth made us all Smite (thanks, Forth!) 'n' he 'n' Llew went in to engage it. 'Cept it was quite the ornery caster. First it put up a Force Cage to try to lock everyone 'cept Forth out o' the room (Alembic got rid of that), then it did some weird time thing 'n' suddenly there were a whole bunch of it, so I used Shieldy on myself 'n' moved up to give Llew a bit o' luck 'n' it bit me anyway, then Llew 'n' Forth hit it a bunch 'n' it did the time thing again 'n' healed up, then I ran away 'n' it bit me again, then Llew 'n' Forth hit it a bunch 'n' it did the time thin again 'n' healed up, 'n' it was lookin' like this was goin' to go on forever, or at least until it ran out of time things or we ran out of healing.

Llew 'n' Forth were havin' all kinds o' trouble hittin' it, so even though I knew I was badly hurt, I told Alembic to go ahead 'n' teleport me behind it. I had my Shield up, 'n' I could do my dancin', 'n' maybe, just maybe, I could distract it enough to let Llew 'n' Forth finish it off before it killed me.

So, all I can say is, I'm a good distraction. Forth 'n' Llew started hittin' it more often, 'n' I could wave my dagger at it like I was goin' to try to stab it but then use Ornery instead 'n' it just kind of annoyed it, 'n' it tried to beat Forth to death, 'cause it's what you do, and eventually it looked like it was goin' to drop before Forth did 'n' Alembic hit it with Lightning because he thought it was going to try to run away and it worked.

We were seriously banged up, so Forth and I started channeling to heal everyone, while Llew 'n' Alembic borrowed my treasure stitchin' carpet 'cause there was a massive dragon hoard to deal with 'n' we didn't have a lot of time. So Alembic checked for anythin' we could use right away, didn't see anythin', 'n' into the carpet everythin' went. We'll check it later. We were almost out of resources, but the next message told us that we had to hurry: The Mother o' Wights left us a message that since we got past her pet great wyrm red dragon revenant, she was going to run.

The chase was on...

2 people marked this as a favorite.

Okay. I like that the Big Bad said "I'm outta here!" Though I smell a trap because why tell the good guys you're booking it unless you want them to rush on ahead and get hit by traps? ^^

Thank you for sharing this campaign journal :)

2 people marked this as a favorite.

Glad you enjoyed it!

As you might have guessed, the next entry is the final one, with the BBEG fight and all its repercussions.

Doing my best to stay quiet, avoid spoilers, and wait until after the final post to make a few comments...

1 person marked this as a favorite.
Tangent101 wrote:

Okay. I like that the Big Bad said "I'm outta here!" Though I smell a trap because why tell the good guys you're booking it unless you want them to rush on ahead and get hit by traps? ^^

Thank you for sharing this campaign journal :)

Of course, it would be perfectly valid tactics for a villain to try to lure the PCs into some traps AND actually make a run for it . . . .

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Session 60, Played 10-Nov-2019

Honestly, it was a pretty short chase.

At the end of the room was a giant pair of double doors made o' solid stone. I checked 'em over 'n' couldn't see any traps or locks, so I pulled out my Insistent Doorknocker 'cause why be predictable, but it couldn't get through the doors! Those were some thick doors! So I asked Llew 'n' Forth to pull 'em open, but they weren't paying attention to me (happens a lot), so I tried to pull 'em open myself to set a pathetic example for the group, 'cept they moved! Surprised, I let 'em go 'n' they closed up again, but that got Llew 'n' Forth to pay attention, as planned, and Llew pulled the door open a bit while I was busy gettin' out my Immovable Rod and my Traveler's Any-Tool and turnin' it into a crowbar. Forth, bein' a dwarf, was more interested in the tools I was makin' than the door so he nearly tripped over me 'n' ran into the door, 'n' wasn't much help at all.

The sad thing was, nobody even expected Alembic to help.

So once I had my crowbar I jammed it into the crack 'n' heaved 'n' we could almost see inside and… BOOM!!!! The whole door vanished into a powdery mist o' stone 'n' ash. Darn it, Alembic! Couldn't you warn us before Disintegrating a door we're holding?!?!!??!

Anyhoo, now that we had a good view of what was goin' on in the next room, it didn't look good. Around the edges of the room was a floor-level area, where we were. In the middle of the room, so it could be dumpin' all kinds o' nastiness into the floor-level area, was a bunch o' the machinery from Gillamoor! The giant's brain was there, powerin' some kind o' apparatus, 'n' it was connected to other parts o' the giant by bits of intestine. Which I only knew 'cause I remember the things tryin' to beat the livin' daylights out o' me oh so long ago, 'n' I think it was Llew who helpfully identified them for me back then. So thanks for that, Llew. In the middle o' the platform was a pile o' hundreds 'n' hundreds o' charred skeletons, all goblin-sized, so now we knew where all those goblin corpses went. Finally, in the back o' the room was another image o' the Mother o' Wights, cacklin' 'n' turnin' knobs 'n' sayin' that now we were gonna get it. And between us and her was a massive portcullis that looked like it was made o' solid adamantine. Now THAT'S somethin' worth lootin!

Well, I knew my cue. I figured that had to be the real Mother o' Wights, 'n' I had one job to do against her 'n' heck if I wasn't gonna do it. I flew forward, slipped through the portcullis with ease ('cause a girl's gotta keep her figure, y'know), got hit by another Forbiddance 'n' Unhallow (doesn't she get tired o' castin' those things? At least I'm Chaotic, so it doesn't hurt me so much, or at least that's what Alembic says about 'em). I tingled a bit, so I knew it'd stripped some of Alembic's protections off of me, but I could still fly, 'n' I could still breathe, 'n' that was really all I needed at the moment. I said a prayer to Calistria 'n' kicked off Silency. You wanna cast spells, Mother o' Wights? Well, I have another idea…

So, the Mother o' Wight's no dummy; I'll give her that. The moment I got through the bars she knew the jig was up, so she turned on all the machinery to end the world 'n' such. 'N' I had no idea how literal that was.

All the bones started spinnin' 'n' turnin' into a whirlwind 'n' formin' into some giant undead-tornado-golem thingy, 'n' Llew gasped 'n' I knew that was bad so I called out so she could tell me what it was before I went silent, seein' as I was in the room with it 'n' everythin' and now it didn't seem like the best idea in the world if I couldn't hide from it. So, for namin', it was called an "Undead Mortuary Cyclone". Which seemed kind o' redundant, but apparently the regular kind o' these things (not the undead kind) absorb livin' people to become bigger 'n' more powerful, so once they've wiped out a village or whatnot, they kind of peter out 'n' get killed by paladins or adventurers or whatever. This one absorbed both living critters AND undead to get bigger 'n' more powerful. And right behind us, past the doors and a few hours' journey away, was the biggest sea o' undead the world had ever known.

As far as Llew could tell, if we failed and it got past us and got to the sea, it would be the end of all life on Golarion.

No pressure, though.

So, to hurt it you needed to use magic bludgeoning weapons, so I was out. Plus it couldn't be flanked and had no vital parts, so I was feelin' much better 'bout goin' after the Mother o' Wights. If it passed over dead critters (neither alive nor undead), it turned them into undead. If it killed you, it turned you into undead. Which were more powerful, 'cause it had a Desecrating Aura. But which it could then eat. This was the most twisted, awful, confusin' destructive force of unnature I'd ever seen. I was kind o' pleased 'cause it was so confusing, but much more repulsed 'cause the end o' the world 'n' all that. On top o' just poundin' you with its undead fists, it could breathe bodies on people (eew!), 'n' it was pretty resistant to spells, 'cept Alembic could probably hurt it 'cause he's actually good at what he does 'n' all, even if I do tease him a lot. But the best news of the day: As far as Llew knew, all it had for senses was Darkvision, 'n' the Mother o' Wight's machines were makin' shadows all over the room, so I'd be able to wink out 'n' get her.

'N' she knew it. She targeted me with somethingorother that stung quite a bit, but didn't do anythin' else. Alembic helpfully told me it was a Destruction spell, and if I weren't so lucky I'd be permanently dead from it. Well, at least I knew I had her attention!

From behind me, I heard Llew start in on the bars, then start yellin' at Alembic that the bars were adamantine 'n' she needed him to disintegrate 'em, but he was apparently all out of Disintegrates so instead he just went ahead 'n' Stone Shaped the top of 'em so Forth could knock 'em in, 'n' he made us all Smitey, too. I figured since I couldn't hurt the cyclone anyway, as Silency activated 'n' the world went dead silent I Smote Evil on the Mother o' Wights (it felt good), then winked out 'n' flew over next to her. I could tell from her face that she knew she was Silenced, 'n' I was going to follow her everywhere. Llew ran in 'n' hit the tornado, 'cause end o' the world 'n' all, 'n' it looked like she hurt it a bit, though it's hard to tell with tornadoes 'n' all. I'm pretty sure she was smitin' evil on it, but you can't really tell such things, 'specially when you can't hear.

Unfortunately, what I did notice was the cyclone gettin' all uppity 'bout gettin' hit. It spun 'n' blew 'n' hurled chunks o' bodies at the rest o' the party, which I'm sure hurt quite a bit, but bein' a flyin' gnome in a tornado was no picnic, either, 'n' it was all I could do to stay next to the Mother o' Wights 'n' not reappear in a particularly vulnerable spot, say, right in front of her 'n' her scythe. But I stayed hidden, 'n' she couldn't see me, so she ran away, hopin' to trick me into stabbing her. But I didn't, 'n' I let her run, 'n' I followed her… right up 'til she ran right into the middle o' the darned tornado! Stupid smart bad guys! Once she'd scraped me off, she moved back to her corner 'cause she was even faster than I was, even with Alembic's Haste and flight 'n' everything, 'n' she pulled out a wand and cast a Blade Barrier between us. That didn't seem right, but at least I could probably get through it 'n' keep harassin' her. 'Cept now I wished I'd stabbed her when I had the chance!

Unfortunately, Alembic couldn't see me, either, 'n' didn't know my plans, so he filled up the room around her with his woody guys, then put a lava wall behind her so there was nowhere safe for me to go in that corner! It was downright crowded! Forth came runnin' all the way around the cyclone guy to give Llew a flank (can you even flank a cyclone?), but it moved him into my Silence field 'n' I saw him tryin' to lay hands on himself (not that way, silly! This was a fight!) 'n' nothin' happened, so I knew I had to get out of his way. 'Cept one corner was full o' wood golems 'n' lava, one corner was full o' Forth, 'n' the other half o' the room was all full 'cause o' Llew. And then Alembic was out in the hallway castin' spells from afar. So, bein' a smart girl 'bout not gettin' my friends killed, I flew past all of 'em, out into the hallway and down a bit so I wouldn't even get Alembic, 'n' I started countin' seconds 'til the Silence wore off, 'n' I started cursin' myself for lettin' myself be so useless to my friends, but I was still smitin' evil on the Mother o' Wights, 'n' if they lost 'n' the cyclone went to destroy the world, at least the Mother o' Wights wouldn't live to see it.

While I was sittin' there, I got to watch Alembic's face, but I'm not really good at readin' humans, but he was tryin' to cast somethingorother 'n' he looked a bit relieved 'n' less wind-blown, so I think Forth 'n' Llew managed to do in the cyclone and save the world. While I was out in the hallway bein' quiet, of course. I am never usin' that wand again!

I flew back in 'n' there was nothin' but a big billowin' mist on one half o' the room, so I flew on in, knowin' I was goin' to have to be at my best to dodge all the blades, but knowin' my Silence was goin' down soon so I wouldn't be hurtin' my friends. 'N' Forth looked really bad, so once I got into the mist and through the blades I pulled out a scroll o' Heal. 'N' those blades? They were an illusion! And not some highfalootin' illusion like the kind the Jeggares put out that always fool me; just a plain old, ordinary, everyday, "Even Trig can see through it!" illusion. I yelled out to the team that the Blade Barrier wasn't real, except… silenced! Stupid stupid stupid wand!!

And o' course right after I yelled to everyone the Silence went down, 'cause that's my life, 'n' I heard Forth trundlin' in below me (I was near the ceiling at the time, 'cause of all the tree guys I presumed were on the ground), then I heard a horrific CRACK as the Mother o' Wights' scythe cut into Forth. I was happy I had my scroll out, but I was worried I was goin' to drop down 'n' find a dead dwarf. It sounded really, really bad. 'Cept then I heard a whoosh! as she swung at him again, so I knew he was OK!

I prayed to Calistria (seriously, this time), remindin' her that the end o' the world would cause no end of lack of fun, 'n' tried to activate my scroll o' Heal. And it worked! Thank you, Calistria! It was a simple matter to just drop down 'til I saw the top of his fuzzy head (under the helmet) 'n' kind o' kick him in the head 'n' Heal him at the same time, which would've been all kinds o' fun 'cept I was within a couple o' feet o' the Mother o' Wights' scythe 'n' I was pretty banged up already, but I heard Forth take in a breath 'n' knew he was feelin' much better. Llew came in 'n' started tryin' to kill her, but the fog was messin' with her rhythm 'n' she missed a lot, which isn't like her. Forth landed a couple o' solid blows on her, so her time was limited. The Mother o' Wights had a choice to make: Kill me, or kill the freshly-healed paladin. Bein' a vindictive undead type, she went for the paladin, 'n' barely scratched him up a bit. Then Alembic Dispelled the fog.

I could see her in all her glory. Every tendon. Every vulnerable inch. The place I could hit her to cut off her scythe-claw. The place I could drop her to the ground. I started in on my speech, about the loss of Umok, the orphans she'd created, the pain she'd caused, all the orphans she would never create again…
…'cept Llew asked me to wait. To stay my hand so that she could get the killin' blow.

Llew wanted me to betray everythin'. Betray my goddess, who considers vengeance a really personal thing. Betray my family, who were waitin' for me to strike the killin' blow. Betray my instincts, 'cause everythin' was screamin' at me to kill her now.
But it was Llew. My pale angel o' death. The one who held me when I sat up from bein' dead. The one who got madder'n anythin' ever if anyone tried to hurt me. The one who loved me dearly for who I was, 'n' who I loved right back like the sister I never had. 'N' I waited. 'Cause dead is dead, 'n' Calistria really isn't all that uppity if she knows you're thinkin' of her. And I told Llew, 'You owe me dinner!"

Llew agreed, and laid in, 'n' the Mother o' Wights screamed 'cause Llew was mad, 'n' Llew knew darned well I wasn't goin' to stay my hand a second time. So she struck true, 'n' the Mother o' Wights fell before her.
And I stabbed her a few times after she fell, just 'cause it seemed like the right thing to do at the moment.

Llew strode over, grabbed me (which she had trouble with 'cause o' the ring o' Freedom o' Movement 'n' all), planted a big kiss on the top o' my head, 'n' said we could have anything I wanted. I said the first thing that popped into my head: "Orc food!"
Ah, well, I'd regret it, but Llew was bigger'n I was, 'n' she'd regret it more.

Llew asked me whether I had any holy water on me, but she told me to just stop and behave myself after I'd produced half a dozen vials. She anointed the Mother o' Wights' corpse 'n' said words o' Pharasma 'n' all that, 'n' said that the Mother o' Wights would be the final entry in her book o' killin'.

I sure hoped not! Otherwise I might get bored!

So, speakin' o' Calistria, apparently not bein' the one to get in the final stab didn't get her all that riled at me, 'cause I felt the girls perk up 'n' the cheeks blush 'n' all the other nonsense that comes from bein' favored by her, which is awfully nice when you're in town with a bunch o' eligible young male gnomes to entertain you, or even elves (yum!). But in a hellish dimension full o' undead (includin' a sea full of 'em) surrounded by a dwarf, a hunchback, and a pretty-but-decidedly-female half-elf? Not so fun. I could tell the others were favored, too, 'cause Forth smelled like dirt 'n' Llew started mutterin' 'bout needin' to fight with a dagger for the day, which didn't seem like anythin' to be displeased with, since I had to do it every single day o' my life!

While we were lootin' the Mother o' Wights' body, Llew said that maybe I'd accept Shoanti food instead of orc food, 'n' I was kind o' disappointed 'cause I hadn't had anythin' truly terrible in a few days, but I figured I liked her so I said it was OK. We got some standard clericy stuff, like a rod o' somethingorother that Alembic liked, her holy symbol, some rings, and her wand o' illusions, but when Llew grabbed the Moaning Diamond ('cause it was there 'causing all kinds o' noise, 'n' I just didn't want to talk about it 'cause I think it likes the attention), the whole world shook. Literally. Oops!

We were suddenly in a crisis: There were hundreds, if not thousands o' people in the town at the other end o' the vault, Alembic was out o' spells 'n' couldn't've carried 'em all anyway, 'n' there were all the people we'd rescued 'n' put in a Magnificent Mansion 'til we could save 'em. Fortunately, my gnome brain got to save the day, 'n' I felt much better 'bout not killin' the Mother o' Wights. 'Cause I was lookin' at that big ol' Moanin' Diamond, 'n' thinkin' 'bout how much trouble it'd caused us, 'n' how much I'd like to get rid of it, 'n' how easy it would be to hand over to an azata or other Good outsider for safekeeping, and I had it!

I told Llew I was goin' to save everyone by givin' away the diamond, 'n' she said that that was fine with her, so I pulled out my scroll o' Plane Shift to Elysium 'n' kicked it off… eventually. Yeah, scrolls like tension. So it waited for some more shakin' 'n' rock-fallin' to happen before it finally let me go. I asked anyone else whether they wanted to come, and I was touched when everyone wanted to come along, even Alembic! That's how you know your true friends: They're willin' to travel to an entire plane o' people just like you!

Anyhoo, the first thing I learned is that Elysium is a Big Place. I expected a bunch of azata to pop out at me 'n' welcome me 'n' light my nose hairs on fire or somethin', but we were just in a beautiful, pristine, forest-like place that seemed awfully wonderful 'n' made me wish I didn't have the Life Bubble up so I could smell the air. Alembic started mentionin' somethin' 'bout time runnin' much faster here, so wouldn't everyone be dead before we got back 'n' I realized I'd goofed, but there's nothin' to do after you goof but to keep on goin' 'cause it's the right thing to do. So I yelled out in Celestial for help, but nobody answered! Llew looked at the ground for azata tracks, but I could tell she didn't really know what she was lookin' for.

Inspiration struck again, as always happens with gnomes in desperate situations with bags full o' useful items. I pulled out the lone Raucous Canard I'd bought way back in Logas to embarrass someoneorother (probably Blackburn, but who knew?), 'n' yelled into it in Celestial, "We have a bunch o' mortals who need savin' right now, 'n' there's a giant moanin' diamond in it for anyone who's willin' to help!"
Bein' direct with azata's the thing to do, y'know, 'cause we're all a bit loopy 'n' like everything crystal-clear.

It didn't take but a moment or two before this beautiful flamin' woman with a body made o' lava came flyin' up, leavin' a trail o' fire behind her. She had to be powerful enough! I told ber 'bout the big underground cavern 'n' the people who might be good or might be evil in the town down there, 'n' I needed someone to dig 'em out 'n' get 'em to the surface so we could sort 'em all out before they all died, 'n' she asked a couple o' smart questions like, "And can I destroy everything else?" 'n' I said, "Sure," 'cause fun's fun 'n' all, 'n' she quickly gathered as many friends as I could take 'cause they all liked the idea of a big dark underground smashy-smashy, makin' me like 'em all the more, 'n' I asked their names but then forgot 'em again 'cause I was in a hurry, 'n' then I used my returning scroll o' Plane Shift to get us back.

'Cept it was stubborn, too, 'n' the azata laughed at me 'n' teased me a bit. But they were gettin' a big ol' noisy diamond and some fun destruction time, so I didn't mind. Once it went off, we appeared somewhere in the Mother o' Wights' realm, 'n' Llew got us oriented 'n' told the azata which way to go 'n' off they went to do their savin' 'n' destroyin' 'n' whatnot, 'n' we eventually got everyone out of there 'n' back to Eledir proper, where Llew 'n' Forth started sortin' 'em out (which was all kinds o' fun to watch, but I had to do my payment stuff 'n' such). I cheated a little 'n' used Calistria's eyes on the azata to thank 'em 'n' give 'em payment, but I figured Calistria'd blessed me for a reason, 'n' that reason was to save all those people.

So, Llew 'n' Forth dealt with all the people from down below ('n' I have no idea where Liff went or whether he survived, 'n' I didn't really care 'cause if he'd come up, Llew 'n' Forth would've killed him, 'n' if he hadn't he'd be all squishy now), 'n' eventually the town guard 'n' the king heard about all this 'n' asked us to come visit, 'cause he knew if he'd summoned us I'd've had to stab him in the knee.

We went over 'n' I made Heddy kiss my ring. I'd've made him kiss other parts but I know Llew would've scolded me for it. But what's the fun in emerging triumphant if you can't rub it in a little? Anyhoo, he had all kinds o' proclamations. Alembic's family was restored to nobility, which I didn't understand 'cause they sure acted like nobles before, but Alembic seemed really happy about it so I wasn't going to argue. Forth got to report to his temple that his mission was complete, 'n' they said he'd have to wait a moment 'n' they'd send word of his next one. Remind me never to be a paladin o' Torag. Tough crowd. Llew got praised for doin' her duty, but I was bettin' she was prouder 'cause her book was goin' to get published. Heddy turned to me 'n' told me that the temple of Asmodeus had decided to forgive me for all my past transgressions.

Best… laugh… EVER!!!!

I kind o' regretted not transgressin' more, but I'm sure ol' Blackburn had to swallow a lot o' bile to sign off on that one.

We all had baths (well, at least I know Llew and I did), then a celebratory feast, then I started headin' for the temple o' Calistria for some proper celebratin', but then I remembered the temple was in Logas 'n' I was in Eledir 'n' Alembic was out o' teleports.


I went to bed alone that night, which is a horrible sin for a conquerin' hero, said my prayers to Calistria, 'n' went to sleep.

And yeah. I got my reward. And no, you don't get to know.

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Yay! Thank you for sharing this hella awesome ending for this quest. :) It's been quite the ride and I've enjoyed every moment of it. :)

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I knew Alembic shouldn't have used that Disintegrate on the door . . . .

And yes, thank you very much for all your work putting this up!

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When Llew said, "There are tens of thousands of people down here and they're all going to die and we can't possibly save them!" and Trig responded, "Wait! I can do it!" I knew my campaign was complete. And what an amazingly satisfying ending!

When we couldn't find any azata in Elysium (bad roll) and Shiro was smirking and saying, "Oh, well, I guess you can't save any of those people after all..." I noticed the Raucous Canard... and nat 20'ed it!

It was... epic....

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