I have created a mod-proof thread


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You are both monsters.


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Since Mods can't enter the bubble, I'll share my stash of free RPGs.


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Freehold DM wrote:
You are both monsters.

That's pretty harsh. Many monsters are labeled "monsters" by dint of society rejecting them for failing to conform and making the majority uncomfortable by their difference.

Phillip Gastone wrote:

I hate pizza.

Did I ever mentioned I hate pizza?

There, I said it; I hate pizza.

[PARAGRAPH OF PRO-HEIRLOOM TOMATOES PROPAGANDA DELETED] Your palate is unfathomably alien to my understanding, but I support your freedom to decide for yourself.

captain yesterday wrote:

I hate beer and brats.

I also live in the Midwest.

So naturally, I'm viewed with suspicion, as people assume I'm a vegetarian, which are worse then commies...

I learned to like some beers, but I find nearly all popular beers to be bland at best to terrible. I also support your freedom to decide for yourself.

captain yesterday wrote:
...(at least that's what Facebook says).

There's your monster abomination, Freehold.


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Ambrosia Slaad wrote:
Freehold DM wrote:
You are both monsters.

That's pretty harsh. Many monsters are labeled "monsters" by dint of society rejecting them for failing to conform and making the majority uncomfortable by their difference.

Phillip Gastone wrote:

I hate pizza.

Did I ever mentioned I hate pizza?

There, I said it; I hate pizza.

[PARAGRAPH OF PRO-HEIRLOOM TOMATOES PROPAGANDA DELETED] Your palate is unfathomably alien to my understanding, but I support your freedom to decide for yourself.

captain yesterday wrote:

I hate beer and brats.

I also live in the Midwest.

So naturally, I'm viewed with suspicion, as people assume I'm a vegetarian, which are worse then commies...

I learned to like some beers, but I find nearly all popular beers to be bland at best to terrible. I also support your freedom to decide for yourself.

That's right.


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OW OW OW I spilled coffee on myself!


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Phillip Gastone wrote:
OW OW OW I spilled coffee on myself!

*lurking nearby*

Funny how these things randomly happen...

*sips coffee*


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Because I am in this bubble I want to download illegal copyrighted Hounds of Tindalos, I want them to give me legal and psychological counselling and then attack all groups... or possible be attacked by groups I am frankly a little fuzzy on that. The should also cast bad spelling ohn evverywun... ohw noh...


Phillip Gastone wrote:
OW OW OW I spilled coffee on myself!

Cap, I don't mean to laugh at your misfortune...yes I do. Yes I very much do. I can't even pretend. Stick the body part in the snow before you use the snowblower on it.

The snowblower on the snow....not...you know...on your body part...

But I won't say you don't have the right to choose to do that for yourself...just...aim it away...

(Reality check for those that don't know me: I'm responding on the assumption that he isn't actually harmed, since he hasn't said anything otherwise.)


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I assure you, I know what end of a snowblower to stick my arm into.

Now.


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Wow...I just realized Gastone originally wrote that. I swore I saw a CY alias saying that earlier. Ok. In that case, let me rewrite this.

Gastone, I don't mean to laugh at your misfortune...yes I do. Yes I very much do. I can't even pretend. Stick the body part in the snow before you use a snowblower on it.

The snowblower on the snow....not...you know...on your body part...just let Cap'n "One Arm" Yesterday show you how it's done. He's got experience in this field. Possibly some other body parts in another field as well. Amazing how far some of those industrial snowblowers can fling things. But I digress.


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He's enhanced and he's expanded,
He can shave a bear left handed,
It's the 'One-Arm' Yesterday Shooow!


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Vanykrye wrote:
Wow...I just realized Gastone originally wrote that. I swore I saw a CY alias saying that earlier. Ok.

Must be your eyes playing tricks on you, Vany. Yep.

{whispering into walkie-talkie:} MP! It worked! You completely altered his perceptions. Now, make him do something else, like stuff a limb into a snowblower. Or... or... HIS HEAD IN A PEANUT BUTTER JAR!!!


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Hunt, the PugWumpus wrote:
Vanykrye wrote:
Wow...I just realized Gastone originally wrote that. I swore I saw a CY alias saying that earlier. Ok.

Must be your eyes playing tricks on you, Vany. Yep.

{whispering into walkie-talkie:} MP! It worked! You completely altered his perceptions. Now, make him do something else, like stuff a limb into a snowblower. Or... or... HIS HEAD IN A PEANUT BUTTER JAR!!!

I agree completely with Hunt. You've got some serious optometrical problems there, yes sir.

*whispering into walkie-talkie:* That's great, Hunt!

...

But we were trying it out on Captain Yesterday. The targeting thing-a-ma-bob on this mind control device is faulty! Who are we getting to design these things?!?


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Master Pugwampi wrote:
Hunt, the PugWumpus wrote:
Vanykrye wrote:
Wow...I just realized Gastone originally wrote that. I swore I saw a CY alias saying that earlier. Ok.

Must be your eyes playing tricks on you, Vany. Yep.

{whispering into walkie-talkie:} MP! It worked! You completely altered his perceptions. Now, make him do something else, like stuff a limb into a snowblower. Or... or... HIS HEAD IN A PEANUT BUTTER JAR!!!

I agree completely with Hunt. You've got some serious optometrical problems there, yes sir.

*whispering into walkie-talkie:* That's great, Hunt!

...

But we were trying it out on Captain Yesterday. The targeting thing-a-ma-bob on this mind control device is faulty! Who are we getting to design these things?!?

*on the other side of the forum*

MIDBUS! Where is being Fawful's Wonderawful Controlling Eyebrainsmeats Head-Hat?! Midbus always with the losing Fawful's creationings! You are giving Fawful much fury!


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I want to say that polyamory is wrong.

It should be multiamory, so you're not mixing Greek and Latin roots.


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Hi, I'm Larry, and this is my brother Derro, and this is my other brother Derro. {both Derro derros nod}

Perchance, would any of you happen to have seen our innkeeper friend, Bob? He drank Derro's special mushroom tea by mistake, and now he's wandered off under the delusion that he's a psychologist.


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I just came in here after only reading the title of the thread to say I don't like any of this.

I'd write up a better title for this thread in a twelve-thread manifesto, but it would probably get me thread-banned.


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Pathfinder Adventure Path, Rulebook, Starfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Roleplaying Game, Starfinder Society Subscriber

How dare you! The nerve!! None of this would have happened if Biggie Smalls was still with us!!!


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1d4 ⇒ 2 goblin babies personally blame Smally Biggs, the small medium at large.


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And now we find out if Voltaire was right when he said “if Mods did not exist, it would be necessary to invent them”


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What if a non-mod tells the moderators what we're doing in here? Couldn't the moderators infract us outside the thread? The safety of the bubble decreases day by day. It's like being on a slowly sinking boat in the middle of the ocean.


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Listen, just paint the interior of the bubble with weather-resistant paint and call it the outside. Thus, everything that was once outside is now technically inside, and safely contained. Sure, it might be a very large containment area - including, among other things, Disneyland, the Andromeda galaxy M31, and the bacon - but it is still by definition contained.

We can all be safe in here!

Say, how much headroom does this thing have? I feel someone's elbow in my... wait, is that an elbow?


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Phillip Gastone wrote:

Listen, just paint the interior of the bubble with weather-resistant paint and call it the outside. Thus, everything that was once outside is now technically inside, and safely contained. Sure, it might be a very large containment area - including, among other things, Disneyland, the Andromeda galaxy M31, and the bacon - but it is still by definition contained.

We can all be safe in here!

We could even call it... The Aristocrats! (no sorry, try again:) ...The Asylum!

Phillip Gastone wrote:
Say, how much headroom does this thing have? I feel someone's elbow in my... wait, is that an elbow?

Yes, it is an elbow; it is in fact your own elbow from AnotherWhen and AnotherWhere. You've got no right to complain. If you're going to keep bending your elbows and knees into tempting angles, eventually a Puppy of Tindalos is going to show up expecting to play fetch with bits of other yous.


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What would happen if a Ninja wore Camo?


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Phillip Gastone wrote:
What would happen if a Ninja wore Camo?

He'd make like a tree and "get outta heah."


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Did you know that the Doberman is more closely related to the vending machine than the canine?


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We've been picked by the staff! They're in arms with us, against the mods!

(The mods and the staff are two different groups, right?)


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"A wizard must always take care of his staff, Hairy Baggins," said Gandolfadore. "He must protect it, not go poking it about looking to spring traps or thumping stone-headed orcs over the noggin. Thrusting it into dark holes must be done cautiously and tenderly until you can ascertain how best to plumb its depths. A wizard must keep his staff clean, taking time as needed to rub it gently and lovingly with warm oil. When the wood is young, this may occur two or three times a day. Use long, slow strokes to polish your staff..."


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I'll be in my bunk. With my staff...


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I hope you've taken Blind Fight.


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I thought the mods and the staff were one and the same. But if they're separate beings... wait, so are we going to merge into the Amalgam universe!?


Hey, that was pretty dope (when it wasn't dumb), so that's kind of sort of cool with me.

I also kind of wanted it to keep going.


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Tacticslion wrote:

Hey, that was pretty dope (when it wasn't dumb), so that's kind of sort of cool with me.

I also kind of wanted it to keep going.

Wolverine beating Lobo. Pfffttttttt.


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Phillip Gastone wrote:
Tacticslion wrote:

Hey, that was pretty dope (when it wasn't dumb), so that's kind of sort of cool with me.

I also kind of wanted it to keep going.

Wolverine beating Lobo. Pfffttttttt.

Lobo is dumb and also stupid and he smells like a butt.


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I think the Mods are like the Goa'uld. They are parasitic lifeforms that crawl inside the bellies of the staff.


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I liked aspects of amalgam. But I didnt see wolverine beating Lobo outside of a popularity contest.


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Freehold DM wrote:
I liked aspects of amalgam. But I didnt see wolverine beating Lobo outside of a popularity contest.

I mean; that’s basically why anyone won.

And why the combinations were chosen - well, that and vague theming.


Freehold DM wrote:
I liked aspects of amalgam. But I didnt see wolverine beating Lobo outside of a popularity contest.
Tacticslion wrote:

I mean; that’s basically why anyone won.

And why the combinations were chosen - well, that and vague theming.

I feel like I should explain.

So, Aquaman v. Submariner is basically a no-brainer: they're both water guys who do water things and thus would fight each others. Similarly, they're both about as (un-)popular as each other, so putting them together as "Aqua-Mariner" is a great fit. EDIT: And, I mean, yeah, it's boring, but... have you met either of those guys? Anyway, see the "Lobolverine Problem," below; this is a good example of that.

The problem is when you get to people that really clash in terms of style, popularity (both over-all and with specific subgroups of fans or style fans), and "theming."

In style, both Lobo and Wolverine are very similar in a lot of ways: brutal loners who are actually willing to and able to kill others, who ride bikes (well, "bikes"), wear leather, smoke, chew, drink, and basically wallow in vice. The differences are striking, however, in that Wolverine's vices are much more limited (as he is tempered by his teammates) and he has a much stronger morality. This clash really doesn't hinder their fusion... in fact, based on their similarities, Lobo and Wolverine would almost fuse too well, becoming a kind of bland mix of both - kind of like Lobo with claw hands, which... okay, but he could just get a slashy glove - not really that big a deal, and kind of a bland blend of characters. I mean, the match-up had to happen: two regenerating "bad boy" archetypes who are more-or-less on the side of heroes? Gotta happen. But the fusion just makes them both a bit more bland. Also, and much more importantly, Wolvy is just vastly more popular in Marvel circles than Lobo is in DC circles (this says nothing about the rabidness - heh - or dedication of their respective fandoms, just the relative size). That was the most damning factor when considering an amalgamation - and the way they guaranteed the most people would actually purchase (and probably continue to pursue) the magazine is by ensuring Wolverine "won" the fight (conveniently off-panel). While Lobo is undoubtedly more powerful, he's also a bit of a dark comedy character, so this kind of sort of worked for his style, too, even if the outcome wasn't exactly likely.

Regardless, Lobo really couldn't be fused to Wolvy - but, who, really, could? Time to look at secondary characteristics! Wolvy's got the whole morality, loner, and emotional baggage of watching people he loved die; he's often part of the group, but also an outsider; his stories tend to run darker than his fellows'; and he's stupidly daggum popular for team-ups. Spiderman is also a Marvel property, so he's out (and he's a bit to bright for Wolvy's style anyway, symbiot notwithstanding). All those traits do actually sound an aaaaawwwwful lot like someone in the DC universe: Batman. Now, I'm not gonna say that Darkclaw was the most compelling thing I've ever seen - one part 90s grimdark edgelord super-cool, one part "What the frankincense am I looking at?" - but it worked and allowed for a character that hypothetically had the pathos to pull off the deep, dramatic stories of the sort found both in the Wolvy books and the Batsy books. Batman's refusal to kill compounded by Wolverine's berzerker rages and death-dealing claws could make for compelling internal conflict - and seeing a genius martial artist known for planning for every contingency (including his allies going bad) having to plan around his own emotional frailties could be a super-compelling idea. Speaking of...

In a similar vein, you've got Superman v. the Hulk. Both are absolutely the strongest in their respective universes, and both have, more-or-less, punched out reality itself on at least one occasion (though I think Hulk's came later on, and it's a little unclear if his punching of reality itself did any good or if he punched out reality or just tanked it... look, it's complicated, the Onslaught storyline was a little cryptic, even when it was revealing answers; also I don't remember which came first - probably Amalgam, but it's been a cool 20+ years, and thus details elude me, so), and both generally just "get stronger" as the plot demands (the Hulk generally by getting angrier). Neither are unbeatable, but both are stupendously potent. Both are rather popular, and the matchup was actually pretty good. I think it's a liiiiiittle silly how it was decided, but sure, okay, I'll buy it. But the theming is absolutely wrong. Hyper-powered adopted immigrantalien raised to be a bright paragon of all that is good and moral just doesn't sit well with science dude what be hit by gamma rays, goes green brutal when he's mad, and is always on the run from the gub'ment/his own internal demons. I mean, there's a lot to play with, there, but the theming is all over the place. Which is why Superman was put with Captain America - a young man raised to be a bright paragon of all that is good and moral... who had to undergo a strange experiment to become a super soldier... hey, wait... super man... super soldier... BRILLIANT! Besides, both are all-American, wear flag-based colors, and are generally good people. And... both comics were pretty popular - popular enough that both Captain America and (much more famously) Superman had both gotten their own films.

There's also a little bit of nice "friendly rivals" going on by pairing up Captain America with Batman in one-on-one (two staunchly moral mainline heroes of their respective universes), but then fusing Superman (friendly rival of Batman) with Captain America. (The Wolverine/Superman side doesn't really do anything, but that's okay; this is a cash grab, not an infinitely deep well to draw from. Of course, it could drive a wedge between Darkclaw and Super Soldier, as the former distrusts the potential side effects of latter's alien DNA, and the latter distrusts whatever raging madness seems to occasionally possess his ofttimes ally. But it's an indirect kind of thing.)

And then there are things that really could be cool, but just felt confusing. Like Amazon/Wonder Woman. I mean... what? Just... just what? That's not an amalgamation! That's just putting the two of them in the same story! Dang it! (Not gonna lie, though, Princess Ororo was aaaaaaaaaaaaawwwwwwwwwwwwwwweeeeeeeeeeeeeeesome. Um, and I guess, uh, Diana Prince, er... looked... uh, amazing? To a young man in the mid 90s? Ahem. (Her character could use a little work, maybe, but she looked... uh... heroic! Yeah! And she was a hardcore cool mom!) But seriously, I just wanted her/them to also have Thorion's hammer. Is that so wrong? Also I wanted more Thorion in my life. His name is such a cool-slash-stupid-slash-brilliant word play, okay?!)

Fun times. Fun times.

I don't know what my point was when I started this. Now I just want to go read all those comics that I probably don't have anymore (and definitely do not have the time to read anymore).


I just had a disturbing thought: could the mods wear the skin of a poster and get through the bubble, like how the robots could time travel in that really old movie, The Terminator? And could they possibly be watching us right now, posing as posters?

That's going to keep me up tonight.


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That's silly. Obviously, I was just tired an hour ago and/or need a nap. Everything's fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine.


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"Really old movie, the Terminator".

I now feel aged and decrepit and will wander off to the forest to die.


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Hey! Not to worry anyone but I’ve been crunching some numbers about this Mod-proof bubble. There’s a definite possibility that as t approaches ♾️, this thread will consist of nothing but an endless game of Mornington Crescent!

I think we’ve got some time before it starts, but I wouldn’t bet the Bank on it...

...Gygax above, I think it’s starting!!!


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I prefer croissants over crescents (or scones), but it's damn impossible to beat a homemade buttermilk biscuit.


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St Pancras.


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Yeah, I'll take a defensive gambit, and move to Elephant and Castle.

Friends of mine actually went there once,and reported you could see something that resembled a caste, but there were no damn elephants to be found... SHAME!


Phillip Gastone wrote:

Yeah, I'll take a defensive gambit, and move to Elephant and Castle.

Friends of mine actually went there once,and reported you could see something that resembled a caste, but there were no damn elephants to be found... SHAME!

... but which caste was at the castle?!


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Phillip Gastone wrote:

Yeah, I'll take a defensive gambit, and move to Elephant and Castle.

Friends of mine actually went there once,and reported you could see something that resembled a caste, but there were no damn elephants to be found... SHAME!

Intriguing, but you've left your escarpments exposed as a result, so: Tooting Broadway

And the castle ate all the elephants, just so you're aware.


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Limeylongears wrote:
Phillip Gastone wrote:

Yeah, I'll take a defensive gambit, and move to Elephant and Castle.

Friends of mine actually went there once,and reported you could see something that resembled a caste, but there were no damn elephants to be found... SHAME!

Intriguing, but you've left your escarpments exposed as a result, so: Tooting Broadway

And the castle ate all the elephants, just so you're aware.

I HUNGERED.


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Maybe we have it all wrong! Maybe the bubble protects the mods from us!!!!!!!


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But...what protects us from us?

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