DungeonmasterCal's House of Respite


Off-Topic Discussions

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quibblemuch wrote:
Right? I mean, as cunning realizations go it’s right up there with: “Say… you ever notice how you never see Bruce Wayne in the same room as Spiderman?”

That's it! Bruce Wayne is an arachnophobe!


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Fantasy Monster: Name-Wolf

Name-eating wolves.


Drejk wrote:

Fantasy Monster: Name-Wolf

Name-eating wolves.

This is awesome! Probably one of the most original monsters I've ever seen. Wow...


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quibblemuch wrote:
Right? I mean, as cunning realizations go it’s right up there with: “Say… you ever notice how you never see Bruce Wayne in the same room as Spiderman?”

Did anyone else think of that little comic with Batman and Iron Man throwing money at each other in a billionaire-engineer slap-fight while Spider-Man scrabbles on the ground to scoop up the dropped cash?


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I have not seen that but it sounds brilliant. I mean, Peter Parker's got bills, man.

It does remind me of one of our common gaming table sayings which one of the players last week told me he worked into a management presentation:

If you can throw money at the problem, what you have is not a problem. It is an expense.


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Huh, after almost 37 years of gaming I finally have a name for my style of DMing. Neal Litherland posts about "river games", a middle ground between sandbox games and railroading.

Neal Litherland's "Improved Initiative"

Shadow Lodge

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DungeonmasterCal wrote:

Huh, after almost 37 years of gaming I finally have a name for my style of DMing. Neal Litherland posts about "river games", a middle ground between sandbox games and railroading.

Neal Litherland's "Improved Initiative"

This is exactly the balance I'm trying to strike in my latest NWN campaign, which is going to be the biggest one I've ever run. We have 160+ people signed up, split among 7 DMs. Pray for us.


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Fantasy Monster: Quaff-bird

A potion-sipping birb.


Oh, I'm so going to pitch a flock of these at my party.


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Fantasy Monster: Youth-Seed

A flower pod of youth.


Damn it, man! How do you just keep creating these things? I'm impressed and envious!


Hi, all!

Nothing important going on, but I wanted to check on everyone else. Everyone doing ok?


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Pathfinder LO Special Edition, Maps, Pathfinder Accessories, PF Special Edition Subscriber; Pathfinder Roleplaying Game Superscriber; Starfinder Superscriber

I could use a nap. :-)


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Oh, you know. Ups and downs. Strikes and gutters. The Quib abides.


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Two universal constants: The speed of light and Quib abidance. I can dig it.


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Not a gauntlet that runs across the field at sporting events in the nudds, then.


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Fantasy Monster: Streaking Gauntlet

A magical, floating gauntlet that can wield full-sized weapons.

Courtesy of me currently playing Rogue Legacy 2.


This is great. I'll probably include it in my game next Saturday!


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At the dog park.

STRANGER: *lengthy opinionated ramble about their views on contemporary American society* And why do people believe all these conspiracy theories anyway? People are stupid.

ME: People don't believe conspiracy theories because they're stupid. They believe conspiracy theories because their DNA was coded to believe by the ancient Annunaki astronauts who created humanity as their servitor species.

EVERYONE: *moves away from me*

ME (in my head): Finally. Some peace and quiet.

I think my patience may be running a bit thin.


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I somewhat envy people who have the self-confidence to ramble about politics or social subjects in public with strangers.

I can't imagine being able to just talk about stuff like that with someone you don't know at all. Heck I barely do it with people I know well, not unless I know them well enough to know exactly what kind of response I'm going to get.


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I wouldn't envy it. In my experience, whatever the forcefully held and firmly delivered opinion, it is less the result of self-confidence and more the result of a lack of self-awareness and a bad case of Dunning-Kruger. And the passion and confidence with which the opinions are proclaimed is, generally, inversely proportional to how much the person ACTUALLY knows about what they're talking about. And this relationship holds, regardless of the subject or the content of their opinions.

People just love them some opinions. Sweet Hastur they love them some opinions.

Feh. I just want my dogs to tire themselves out so I can finish my next book. And then maybe a nap.


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Pathfinder LO Special Edition, Maps, Pathfinder Accessories, PF Special Edition Subscriber; Pathfinder Roleplaying Game Superscriber; Starfinder Superscriber

Naps are good. :-)


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quibblemuch wrote:

I wouldn't envy it. In my experience, whatever the forcefully held and firmly delivered opinion, it is less the result of self-confidence and more the result of a lack of self-awareness and a bad case of Dunning-Kruger. And the passion and confidence with which the opinions are proclaimed is, generally, inversely proportional to how much the person ACTUALLY knows about what they're talking about. And this relationship holds, regardless of the subject or the content of their opinions.

People just love them some opinions. Sweet Hastur they love them some opinions.

yeah that's fair


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Fantasy Monster: Watchful Lantern

Another monster inspired by Rogue Legacy 2.


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I would like to take this opportunity to say I have never been to a rave, European or otherwise.


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Monkey Santa wrote:
I would like to take this opportunity to say I have never been to a rave, European or otherwise.

So it is another monkey's cunning plan to exterminate humanity and replace them as dominant species?


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Possibly. My young clone IS still unaccounted for... you know how it is with kids. Always going to raves, spreading pox...


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So, I'm freaking out. As in, high school freshman nerd and the cool, prettiest girl freaking out. I have a friend on Facebook (we've never met in real life or even spoken on the phone but we've had some fun interactions and such, but nothing major). But I have a HUGE crush on her. Last night was the first time we'd chatted in a month and right off the bat she said she wants to come up and hang out for a couple of days next week. She lives in Dallas, a 5-6 hour drive from here.

My brain has been seizing up at random times today and I've decided I'm NOT going to eat responsibly tonight but I want comfort food, instead. So I have a strawberry rhubarb pie in the oven. That's gonna be supper. Then I'm going to spend the rest of the evening freaking out some more.

Dammit, I'm 58 years old and I feel like the homecoming queen asked me to the prom. Egads.


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Holy wow, I don't know enough about you, her, or this situation to say anything helpful, but I'm intrigued and possibly excited for you!


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Andostre wrote:
Holy wow, I don't know enough about you, her, or this situation to say anything helpful, but I'm intrigued and possibly excited for you!

Thanks! The weird thing is, we've never even talked about her coming up or me going there to visit. I don't have expectations other than just two people hanging out and finally getting to meet in person. Still, it completely caught me off guard! LOL

Excuse me, I'm now going to eat the remainder of that pie.


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SQUEEEEEEEEE!


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DungeonmasterCal wrote:

So, I'm freaking out. As in, high school freshman nerd and the cool, prettiest girl freaking out. I have a friend on Facebook (we've never met in real life or even spoken on the phone but we've had some fun interactions and such, but nothing major). But I have a HUGE crush on her. Last night was the first time we'd chatted in a month and right off the bat she said she wants to come up and hang out for a couple of days next week. She lives in Dallas, a 5-6 hour drive from here.

My brain has been seizing up at random times today and I've decided I'm NOT going to eat responsibly tonight but I want comfort food, instead. So I have a strawberry rhubarb pie in the oven. That's gonna be supper. Then I'm going to spend the rest of the evening freaking out some more.

Dammit, I'm 58 years old and I feel like the homecoming queen asked me to the prom. Egads.

FORWARD! FEAR NOT THE UNKNOWN!

Also, you cannot be 58. That is impossible.


Freehold DM wrote:
Also, you cannot be 58. That is impossible.

It surprises me, too. For a number of reasons...lol


Quibbleteen wrote:
SQUEEEEEEEEE!

That's pretty much it.


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Fantasy Monster: Rancid Duelist.

Have they won or lost their last duel?

It's hard to say...


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I tend to at least try to be a nice guy and am not afraid to admit sometimes I fail. But I do try more and more, partly as a way to put the jerk-holery of my past to rest.

Today was not a day for that, however. It's apparently Abuse Kroger Employee Day. I saw three different instances of customers losing their minds and arguing or yelling at Kroger on Salem Road (the one most folks refer to as "The Bougie Kroger"). I saw one young lady in tears as some a~#%#$! was grilling her by repeating, "Why don't you carry that variety of apples? You used to carry that variety of apples!" A manager had to step in and threaten to escort the guy out and spend the afternoon as a guest of Conway PD.

But the instance where I just sort of blanked out and Old Jerk Me came forward was when I was standing in the checkout line and this older gentleman and his wife were in front of me. In the aisle next to us a young couple with a baby were waiting to check out. The old guy in front of me kept going on and on about how "Them kids have a baby and all they's buyin' is snacks and junk food." I knew they were buying for a cookout because I helped them find a couple of things in the chip aisle a few minutes earlier. Eventually the old guy turned at looked at me and started in about the "Them kids". When I got a word in, I said, "Let me look in my wallet. I may have a coupon for It's None of Your Damned Business". He turned red, the guy behind me laughed right out loud, and the old guy's wife looked at me with an expression of long-suffering sadness. But it shut the him up. I don't feel a whit bad about it, either.


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*slow clap*

Well played, Cal. Well played.


DungeonmasterCal wrote:

I tend to at least try to be a nice guy and am not afraid to admit sometimes I fail. But I do try more and more, partly as a way to put the jerk-holery of my past to rest.

Today was not a day for that, however. It's apparently Abuse Kroger Employee Day. I saw three different instances of customers losing their minds and arguing or yelling at Kroger on Salem Road (the one most folks refer to as "The Bougie Kroger"). I saw one young lady in tears as some a&%+%&# was grilling her by repeating, "Why don't you carry that variety of apples? You used to carry that variety of apples!" A manager had to step in and threaten to escort the guy out and spend the afternoon as a guest of Conway PD.

But the instance where I just sort of blanked out and Old Jerk Me came forward was when I was standing in the checkout line and this older gentleman and his wife were in front of me. In the aisle next to us a young couple with a baby were waiting to check out. The old guy in front of me kept going on and on about how "Them kids have a baby and all they's buyin' is snacks and junk food." I knew they were buying for a cookout because I helped them find a couple of things in the chip aisle a few minutes earlier. Eventually the old guy turned at looked at me and started in about the "Them kids". When I got a word in, I said, "Let me look in my wallet. I may have a coupon for It's None of Your Damned Business". He turned red, the guy behind me laughed right out loud, and the old guy's wife looked at me with an expression of long-suffering sadness. But it shut the him up. I don't feel a whit bad about it, either.

The events in TX of late have everyone on edge.


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Freehold DM wrote:
The events in TX of late have everyone on edge.

I'm sure. Here in good old Arkansas people are just being jerks...lol


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quibblemuch wrote:

*slow clap*

Well played, Cal. Well played.

I'm just glad I thought of it when it happened rather than after getting home and unloading groceries. All my best lines occur in later geological ages instead of when they should.


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Woman A Leading Authority On What Shouldn’t Be In Poor People’s Grocery Carts

Maybe that guy was related to the woman in the article? While I usually go out of my way to mind my own business, it really pisses me off when people go after low-paid employees who are just doing their jobs.

Good on you DungeonmasterCal! Standing up for someone can make a world of difference!

[I should include the obligatory disclaimer to watch out for whackos, and that situations should not be escalated to violence.]

[Clenched fist salute] to all the underpaid workers who have to put up with the public's BS!


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DungeonmasterCal wrote:
quibblemuch wrote:

*slow clap*

Well played, Cal. Well played.

I'm just glad I thought of it when it happened rather than after getting home and unloading groceries. All my best lines occur in later geological ages instead of when they should.

The French have an expression for it: L'esprit de l'escalier. It means “spirit of the staircase” or when you think of the remark on the staircase home, long after the argument.

It’s pretty much the story of my life

Except the time a neighbor came over and started the conversation with “Look, I don’t want to be the a@%~@&! neighbor” and I interrupted him with “No, no, you do you, man.”

That was a good day.


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Fantasy Monster: Clockwork Miner

I might have started playing a game today that puts you in the position of a demolitionist that was supposed to be miner but ended being a rebel...


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I have lost a die. A d6, to be precise. This now renders the rest of that set useless and it will now be placed in the section of the chest I keep my dice in for the randomly found dice or the incomplete sets I can't use.

I have a bit of a problem with dice. I have over 800, maybe even very close to 900 individual dice now. I have forced a dice-purchasing moratorium over myself because quite frankly I'll buy dice all day long with money that should have been spent on things like utility bills, food, or rent. In my 37 years of gaming, I have lost twelve dice (that I'm aware of and I'm pretty sure I'm exactly on the nose with this number). I've given away or traded sets, but lost only a dozen.

Dice are as close as I come to having some obsessive compulsive type disorder. I literally laid in bed for almost three hours last night thinking of that one friggin' die and trying to imagine where it could have disappeared as I haven't used that particular set in at least three years.

Y'all send me thoughts and prayers that I don't take this out on my players tonight. It's not their fault in the least, but they will be the ones to suffer...lol


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In other, totally unrelated news, I've started a Monkey Craps game with this new-found d6 I have... SOMEONE FADE ME!


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Ah, Monkey Craps

Bowel movements flung: 4d6 ⇒ (5, 5, 6, 6) = 22

Wow. Just as well that I've been consuming nothing but All-Bran and Guinness for the last month or two.


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Fantasy Monster: Invisible Pygmy Goat


Drejk wrote:

Fantasy Monster: Invisible Pygmy Goat

This is terrific! While reading it I thought of the breed called "fainting goats". Loud, unexpected sounds will cause their legs to become completely stiff and they fall over. It doesn't harm them and they're back on their feet in seconds. But just imagine someone in the adventuring party who suddenly laughs loudly, shouts something, or just claps their hands for something and suddenly they are surrounded by momentarily visible goats, all of which have collapsed and then become invisible again.


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If screaming goats started appearing and disappearing every time I made noise, I’d cut back on the druid’s mushrooms…


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quibblemuch wrote:
If screaming goats started appearing and disappearing every time I made noise, I’d cut back on the druid’s mushrooms…

Maybe you should increase the dosage?

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