DISCUSSION QUESTION
When it comes to in-game sexuality, how far is “too far” at your table? Do you allow the occasional R-rated scene, or do you simply default to a "fade to black" policy? Do you set ground rules up front?
I've got a few thoughts over here, but I'd be curious to hear how the rest of you guys handle this tricky topic.
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Most of the time, it doesn't really come up. Our table are fairly mature and none of us would take time away from the rest of the table to bump uglies. When it does, generally fade to black, the character is occupied. Same if the character was practicing the Profession or Craft skills.
Honestly, Sex, Religion, and Politics are the three things that generally stay off the table. If there weren't specific abilities in the books that specify "creatures that could be sexually attracted to you", I probably wouldn't even think about sex at the table.
We aren't running a porn-simulation game. Fade to black is fine for the hot and steamy bits. Crude jokes the next morning over ale. Everyone at my table is mature enough that this isnt an issue. Occasionally someone will ask about downtime consequences and the next generation of adventurers, and I have rules I put aside for those questions. Really doesn't come up often, and when it does, I have a new plot hook.
No rules, just fade to black.
Ofc, depending on the PCs, comments, funny remarks, events due to this like romance... might come before/later, but i atleast dont GM the act itself.
For example, playing a table with a party of four ulfen, 2 stereotypical vikings, 1 mid way there. This comes up often has a topic, be it them discussing last night or the next one, but the fade to black remains for the act itself.
I have only slightly more desire to roleplay explicit sexual encounters (extemporaneous erotica?) in front of my friends than I have to actually have sex with them watching. That is to say, not much.
I have a similar level of desire to listen to them roleplay their carnal exploits in rapturous detail (well, more likely with painful awkwardness, but that's not quite as fun to type).
Fade to black.
Even if you plan to (for example) have their partner try to assassinate them during the act, fade to black, and then "Give me a Sense Motive check. As you are mid-encounter, you see an evil glint in the eye of Iyonicus, the supposed redeemed Incubus. He begins casting a spell-like ability. Roll for initiative!"
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Oh, I usually gloss over it with some passing reference to the funny bits and maybe a roll or two so I can make something embarrassing happen to someone because we're all over 30 and sex makes us giggle. Everyone wants to f#~& half my NPCs, so I generally run a fairly sexually open setting, which everyone seems to enjoy.
Edit: Also I don't think my players have ever invaded the home of a reclusive mage without discovering their exotic forms of magical masturbation. And there was one dungeon I ran where the entire mystery the players were unraveling was that the wizard who made it died because he tried to neg a marilith. There's a well known book on courting spirits and demons and soforth in my setting. All original copies of it carry a curse that compels the readers to write new editions with lethal errors.
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For physical acts of carnal whoopee, fade to black. Romance is another thing. I have played in one DC Heroes campaign where my character fell in love with another PC and it became a major plot point at one time. We even held a mock wedding and all the players attended then we had a barbecue.
In a decade-long 2e campaign that I DM'd my wife's character and the character of one of the guys fell in love. It made for some fun and interesting dynamics game wise.
In that same campaign, one of the PCs had a love interest in an NPC. The back story was complicated and very intriguing. The end of that love affair was when he returned as a wight and tried to kill and raise her as a wight so they would always be together. That was actually quite emotional for the player.
Fade to Black for any actual carnal acts.
I would like to be better at interacting romance and think that could enhance a game, but I know my limits and usually making that sort of encounter doesn't work and is beyond my ability to act and make it interesting. If I have a player who wants to pursue something along those lines, I usually just let them determine how it goes and let them inform the rest of the group in whatever manner they want (a few sentences for some, a short story in another case.)
Obviously this is mostly a one PC thing or in rare cases two PCs and in the former case I generally don't like to spend much in game time on a single player anyway (keeping the entire group involved is my goal) and in the case of two PCs, they shouldn't need any GM intervention.
My group has a fade to black policy. Though I would like to note how effective seduction can be even in some of the APs. The most notable one in my group was the fun of pimping out our sorceress to Muminofrah in Mummy’s Mask. Lol.
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Romance? Sure.
Sexuality? As a concept, fine.
Sex acts? By default, they occur offstage. If that's not completely possible, the details are left to the imagination unless they're narratively or mechanically relevant. Our table hasn't drawn hard lines or veils yet, but there is an understanding that we're here to play a game and tell a shared story, not use the game as a vehicle for exploring the players' kinks.
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died because he tried to neg a marilith.
O_O
I don't know what's worse, the idea of this working or the fact that likely candidates for the wizard's last words are already forming in my head.
<SELF-REDACTED>
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Romance and sexuality are two different things.
At our tables, sexuality is a thing that is referred to, but not acted out. Which is to say, if a player wants their PC to engage in sex, they say "my character has sex". There's no need - or desire - at our tables to know the details any more than bathroom antics. It is sufficient to know that a PC has left to attend to nature's demands, without knowing how many flushes are required afterward. And I'm a real-life perv.
As for romance, well, that's something that is strangely... background. What I mean is, when PCs and NPCs develop a relationship, it just happens without being noteworthy. Yes, roleplay happens, yes words are spoken partially in-character, but it's no different from haggling for a better price on a magic sword. It's just a thing that happens, as normal functioning of an RPG... in the background without being HOLY F, THE DM JUST SAID A FLIRTY AT DOUG!
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Oh yeah....