Checks and Imbalances - A Kingmaker Story


Campaign Journals


6 people marked this as a favorite.

So, my kiddos have once again asked for an after-school campaign. The initial plan was for some good ol' piracy with Skull and Shackles, and one of them offered to run the first couple of chapters over the summer. The end result is so far off the rails to be effectively beyond repair, so we're building a country instead! A fitting send-off for the seniors amongst them.

Our would-be Founders of a Great Land(TM):
Elum Orlovsky, ifrit sorcerer with the elemental bloodline. His family is hiding this...interesting scion out in the boonies to avoid embarrassing questions. A successfully-secured colony just might make those questions easier to deal with.
Finley Cooper, Rostlander halfling cavalier of the Order of the Paw. Exploring the greenbelt for great justice with trusty canine steed, Cujo. I am aware that the rules say a cavalier must be 4th level before choosing a riding dog rather than a wolf. Given that it's a stupid rule, I have elected to handwave it. Viva la puppy mount.
Bo Ripley, grippli witch. None-too-pleased about these colonists moving into his turf, but if you can't beat 'em, join 'em.
Richie Williams, human fighter. Elum's bodyguard sent to keep the inexperienced mage alive.
Rhodo Darkwhirl, halfling monkfarmhand. Chelish opportunist eagerly seeking land for family expansion due to housing numerous refugees and running out of room.
Ursa Lebeda, human cleric of Desna. Interested in helping get a colony started.

Had at least one, possibly two, not able to make it due to stuff, so introductions will continue next time! But surely nothing can go wrong.


5 people marked this as a favorite.

Stolen Land - Part 1
"I'm already suspicious of his hair."

"Be it so known that the bearer of this charter has been charged by the Swordlords of Restov, acting upon the greater good and authority vested within them by the office of the Regent of the Dragonscale Throne, with the right of exploration and travel within the wilderness region known as the Greenbelt. Exploration should be limited to an area no further than thirty-six miles east and west and sixty miles south of Oleg’s Trading Post. The carrier of this charter should also strive against banditry and other unlawful behavior to be encountered. The punishment for unrepentant banditry remains, as always, execution by sword or rope. So witnessed on this 24th day of Calistril, under watchful eye of the Lordship of Restov and authority granted by Lord Noleski Surtova, current Regent of the Dragonscale Throne."

With these words, a group of intrepid souls arrived at Oleg's Trading Post in the waning days of winter. Most were concerned with the chill and didn't seem overly concerned with introducing themselves. Richie knocked on the gate, and a woman named Svetlana greeted them warmly, thanking them for their quick arrival and assuring them that her husband Oleg would be with them shortly; he was working on the roof. Elum promptly went to cast mending on the roof. Somewhat nonplussed that his excuse was gone, Oleg joined them with a grumble.

Svetlana turned the conversation to their bandit problem, which the party took perfectly in stride, assuming it to be a general part of their charter despite this being the first they'd heard of Oleg's having such trouble. As they began to discuss strategy, Elum showed Oleg the charter, prompting the man to excuse himself to the stables. Rhodo bounded after him, offering to help. Oleg passed the little halfling a rake bigger than she was, and she began working diligently...bagging much of the fertilizer with rocks and carrying it up to the walls. During this time, a grippli wandered in, claiming to be part of their team and introducing himself as Bo. No one recgonized him, but no one argued against his presence. Richie and Finley were assigned watch positions for the night, and the group got into position as sunrise approached.

The bandits, led by a hooded man called Happs, arrived right on schedule the next morning, though without the hatchet-woman Svetlana had described as their leader. Oleg opened the door to let the group inside...where they promptly spotted Bo. Finding the 2' frog more adorable than anything, one of the bandits made a crack about frog legs. This alarmed Rhodo, who dropped a bag of rocks, drawing their attention. Now suspicious, Happs made a comment about a midget. This angered Finley, who poked her head around the corner to tell the bandit to say that to her face. Stealth blown, the fight was on.

Bo cast his evil eye on Happs, while Rhodo threw bags of waste (having failed to turn the catapults to aim inside the fort) and Elum called upon his sorcery to set the bandits afire. A shot from Happs nearly felled the mage before Richie could stand between them and Ursa could heal. Finley charged into the fight, swinging her hammer. After several close calls, Happs and one other bandit were knocked unconscious while the remaining two fled. After some debate, it was determined that they would be let go...mostly due to arguing long enough to give them an extensive lead.

Bo and Ursa stabilized Happs for Elum to question, and they were able to learn the general location of the bandit camp. Feeling vindictive, Elum and Finley then killed him despite Ursa's arguing and attempts to heal him. Oleg and Svetlana exchanged worried glances at the future of the Greenbelt...

Notable Quotes
Rhodo: I'm already suspicious of his hair.

Finley: You've got a really elaborate plan, Torch.
Elum: ....It's Elum. Anyway, Richie and Rhodo will be up front, keeping them busy-
Rhodo: Excuse me? I didn't bag all that poop for nothing!

Finley: Yeet the horse!

Finley: I can't believe I rolled the first nat 1!
Rhodo: I rolled the first 1!
Elum: No, I did!
Finley: Why are we fighting over who failed harder?!

GM: And Happs is dead.
Ursa: You guys! I was trying to heal him!
Elum: He was trying to kill us!
Finley: It's fine, we have another one. You can be friends with him.
Ursa: UGH. Fine.


2 people marked this as a favorite.
GM Bookwyrm wrote:
During this time, a grippli wandered in, claiming to be part of their team and introducing himself as Bo.

Might as well start calling him Malek now. It'll save trouble in the long run.


3 people marked this as a favorite.
"GM Bookwyrm wrote:
Bo and Ursa stabilized Happs for Elum to question, and they were able to learn the general location of the bandit camp. Feeling vindictive, Elum and Finley then killed him despite Ursa's arguing and attempts to heal him. Oleg and Svetlana exchanged worried glances at the future of the Greenbelt...

Ah, playing with kids! Where "murderhobo" is just a term amateurs use.


1 person marked this as a favorite.

Yay! The Rainbows are back!

And NH, you ain't kidding.


Quote:

Finley: It's fine, we have another one. You can be friends with him.

Ursa: UGH. Fine.

That sounds familiar...


6 people marked this as a favorite.

Further introductions!

Quinn DuBois, changeling bard (court bard archetype). On the run from her mother, she is passing as a boy to hide. Totally here to help with the colony and not at all a bandit.

And corrections! I did not have the spelling properly, and it is actually Erza the cleric.

Part 2
"I get to die or join the traveling circus."

With a location in mind (assuming the late Happs had spoken true), the would-be conquistadors now had a direction...if they thought themselves ready for the challenge. In the meantime, however, they had a surviving captive to deal with. Said bandit came to slowly and was very shortly offered the ultimatum of joining the group and telling them what he could about the bandits...or death. Said bandit was bright enough to take said offer, introducing himself as Quinn DuBois. He gave the name Kressle as his boss among the bandits but little other information. Erza tended his (party-inflicted) wounds.

The group then turned their attention to the jobs board posted, hoping to scrape up a bit of coin to fund their work. Rhodo leapt up and pointed to one from Svetlana, deciding that gathering a basket of radishes was "probably easiest." They set off, exploring the area and soon coming across a worrying expanse of skeletons. After alerted to a strange divot in the ground, Elum decided to do what any survivalist in a forest would and shot a ray of fire at it, somehow managing to miss it while setting nothing else on fire. This awoke the spider within. Bo used his evil eye on the creature, while Quinn attempted to insult it. Finley then insulted her upon recognizing that spiders are immune to such effects. Erza's bless, Rhodo's crossbow, and Richie's sword made short work of the creature, only allowing it time to take a single bite out of the bodyguard before falling. Being good little opportunists, they set to looting the area, finding the not-yet-eaten body of a bandit, this one also carrying a silver stag skull pendant as well as a rough sketch of a dead tree marked with an X.

The spider murdered and robbed, they moved onward, finally finding the patch of moon radishes Svetlana had mentioned...and a small group of drowsy kobolds. Curious as to the posting they had seen about trouble with a local tribe of the creatures, Elum attempted to speak to them. They sluggishly hurried for their weapons, unable to understand him. Erza then relayed his words, surprising the group with her knowledge of Draconic. Between the two of them, they negotiated the purchase of a basket of radishes and learned that the Sootscale tribe to which they belonged had been having an issue with local bandits as well as mites. The kobolds then asserted that the radish patch was theirs, to which Erza agreed. They returned to the trading post to deliver their treasure to Svetlana.

Notable Quotes
Quinn: Why am I tied- coughs, deeper voice Why am I tied up?
Elum: Why are you doing that to your voice?
Quinn: This is my real voice.

Quinn: Oh, boy. I get to die or join the traveling circus.
Elum: ...so what'll it be?
Quinn: I'll get paid and protected for this, right?
Rhodo: In theory.
Quinn: Great! I'm Quinn. The boy. DuBois. Quinn DuBois.

Finley-OOC: What's my motivation?
DM-OOC: Well, your trait says you're very excited about this.
Finley: pounds table GUYS I am super JACKED for this colony!

Oleg: So...we're keeping one.
Rhodo: Yep. crazy eyes

DM: Elum, you find the body of a bandit-
Quinn: Can I see down there?
DM: Yes.
Quinn: AUGH. NO, NOT JEREMY!

Quinn: Bo, you're a frog! Just eat it!
Bo: What.
Finley: It's like three times his size!


1 person marked this as a favorite.
GM Bookwyrm wrote:


Quinn: Why am I tied- coughs, deeper voice Why am I tied up?
Elum: Why are you doing that to your voice?
Quinn: This is my real voice.

Peter Quill's long-lost relative?


John Napier 698 wrote:
GM Bookwyrm wrote:


Quinn: Why am I tied- coughs, deeper voice Why am I tied up?
Elum: Why are you doing that to your voice?
Quinn: This is my real voice.
Peter Quill's long-lost relative?

Think the intent was more Mulan passing as Ping.


The intent might be Mulan/Ping, but I have to agree with John. That exchange is right out of Infinity War. Almost perfectly so.


6 people marked this as a favorite.

Part 3
"Stinky Holy Place?"

Feeling a bit more confident with their successful negotiation and grocery run behind them, the colonizers decided to continue their investigation of the region. Their wanderings this time took them to a quiet stretch of forest. After a short stretch of time, they became aware of a rustling in the brush...and a gradually growing louder growling that Finley identified as an owlbear's cry. They argued briefly in hushed tones about whether to flee or fight...and suddenly a creature burst from the shrubbery: a common squirrel. Rhodo shot it on panicked reflex. Elum, Bo, and Erza then thought to try and see if the mismatched cry was magical, determining it to be a ghost sound effect. They determined to ignore the chaos and continue on.

All was well until Elum mentioned the bandit camp, at which point Rhodo spotted a tiny blue dragon with butterfly wings appearing over his head, though not in time to prevent it casting create water over the ifrit. She called out to the creature while the sorcerer prestidigitationed himself dry. Finley and Bo identified him as a faerie dragon. Upon hearing "Faerie," Elum offered a gift of one of the potions Oleg had given them. The little dragon swooped down and flew off with it. Quinn, Erza, and Finley declared him adorable. Bo seemed done with the whole situation.

Things were quiet until they pitched camp and decided they wanted to tell ghost stories. Midway through Quinn's, their campfire turned purple, and they noticed a tiny cricket-woman perched atop the pavilion tent. The faerie dragon, meanwhile, landed on Elum's head as he wandered a bit away from the others. He biffed the diplomacy check, prompting the dragon to decide he needed to be happier...and breathed his euphoria breath in the mage's face. Elum rejoined the others, in the best mood of his life...for about thirty seconds. The two fey now decided to show themselves, determining the group to be at least not hostile. Another diplomacy check from Finley and Quinn finally convinced them to become friends, and introductions revealed their names to be Perlivash and Tyg-Titter-Tut. They asked if the party was here to "stop the mean bigginses" ...and things became briefly awkward when they saw the stag pendant Rhodo had begun wearing in her hair because it was shiny. She quickly assured them she was not one of the bandits, and the fey began discussing amongst themselves whether they knew of various things about the Greenbelt. Elum slid the map over with a pen, and Perlivash took the opportunity to draw all over the map...some of which was useful. When questioned about the...shapes, the fey clarified: stinky holy place, hot spring, dead biggins, and bad wires. Perlivash breathed on Rhodo before they left, and in her fey-induced euphoria, she gleefully thanked the fey. They declared they would remember and zoomed off.

After a night's rest, they decided to investigate the "stinky holy place," wondering what on earth that could be. After a good deal of walking, the woods gave way to a stone structure in obvious disrepair, bearing the visage of an elk. Elum and Rhodo speculated a connection to the stag tokens, but they did note the shape was fairly different, Rhodo making the connection to the church of Erastil.

As they moved to the immense basin to investigate, a low growling soon arose from the once-temple. As they turned to look, they saw an massive grizzly bear coming toward them...

Notable Quotes
Rhodo: I shoot the evil squirrel!
Quinn: No, it's not a normal squirrel!
Rhodo: EXACTLY. Max damage!
DM: The squirrel falls over, dead. The growling continues for a few seconds after it died.
All: ...

Elum-ooc: Am I still high?

DM: As Quinn's story reaches the scary part, the flames flash violet.
Quinn: I roll with it!
DM: Finley and Bo notice a tiny woman with the body of a cricket atop the tent, listening intently.
Bo: Can I eat her?
Erza, Quinn, Rhodo, Finley: NO

Rhodo: swaying Ooooh thaaank you you've been helpful!
Tyg: We remember that! zooms off
Elum: Three words I told you not to say to fey! Sorry, thank you, and you're welcome.
Quinn: counts on fingers Waaaaait.

Tyg: Do you think they know the stinky holy place?
Perlivash: Dunno!
Finley: Stinky holy place?
Tyg: Eeeeee they know!
Elum: What is the stinky holy place?
Perlivash: very slowly Is holy place. That is stinky.

Tyg: You not mean bigginses!
Finley: I'm not a biggins!
Tyg: lands beside her, looks up at her Biggins!


5 people marked this as a favorite.

And one more!
Sheldon, elf ranger. Happened to be passing through when the colonists were around and figured he might as well stick with them.

Part 4
"Dad?"

They readied for action as the bear approached, Bo opening as usual with his evil eye. Richie and Finley moved to engage the creature in melee, while Elum took a position to throw fire. However, an arrow came in from the woods, soon followed by an unfamiliar elf coming to their aid. Quinn hurled insults at the animal. The bear got a claw into Richie before Elum's fire finally began landing true, at one point summoning a fire elemental to aid him. This got Finley so worked up that she accidentally threw her warhammer past the bear in her excitement to attack. The bear was put down shortly after, dissolving into the shape of a man and then into ash.

The elf introduced himself as Sheldon and explained he was looking for treasure. Elum explained that their charter gave them the right to any treasure in the area...at which point Sheldon decided he wouldn't mind traveling with them.

With the "stinky holy place" no longer stinky or bear-infested, the group decided to investigate the hot spring Perlivash had scribbled on the map. Upon arriving, they saw two grippli in the water...who froze momentarily upon seeing them before running toward them, croaking excitedly in their language...that they had been worried sick, where have you been, Bo? Croaking back in embarrassment, Bo assured his parents that he was fine, that the dryskins were nothing to worry about, yes he knew where home was, he's just fine. The rest of the party understood none of this and decided to make use of the hot spring...except for Quinn who declared he was just fine with prestidigitation. As the older gripplis departed, the group asked Bo what that had been about. He unsuccessfully attempted to brush the question off.

Next, they returned to the fey, hoping to gain more information. They were greeted in traditional fashion as Richie barely noticed something had tied his bootlaces together in time to avoid tripping. Without missing a beat, Elum began calling for Perlivash, who once again decided his preferred roost involved messing up the sorcerer's hair, soon joined by Tyg. He asked them if they could tell him anything about the "mean biggins camp," beginning with giving Perlivash the map to draw on, resulting in yet more meaningless doodles along the map's border rather than any actual intel about the camp. He tried again, asking if they could scout the place out, to which the little fey shuddered and said they didn't go there for fear "the bigginses will tear off our wings." While this got them the initial sympathy of Quinn and Finley, Tyg promptly jeopardized this by saying Quinn would know, wouldn't she. Quinn coughed to affect a very deep voice and declare he didn't know what she was talking about, making a throat-slitting gesture as soon as no one else was looking. Tyg got the hint but proceeded to be a bit too obvious in showing that she'd remembered what Quinn meant for the bard's comfort.

Elum finally managed to convince them to fly over the camp at a safe height to tell them what to expect, promising them a big stack of paper to play with...and earning a vague threat from Perlivash that he would "find them" if anything happened to Tyg. With that, the two flew off, leaving the nonplussed party to make camp. Sheldon left to hunt, returning with fresh game. They went to bed without much concern...

...only to awaken to the sound of explosions shortly before sunrise. Elum and Bo were out first...and saw brightly colored fireworks in the sky as the fey announced their return. Grouchy at being awakened, the sorcerer reluctantly handed over a paper for them to report. Struggling with a pencil nearly as big as she was, Tyg first wrote her message in swirly Sylvan before most of the party complained they couldn't read it. She then sighed and drew a rough sketch of the camp, holding it up to Quinn for approval, Quinn muttering quiet threats to the grig trying so hard to impress the bard.

The group returned to Oleg's, finding him cleaning out the stables. Elum prestidigitationed much of the mess away, once again depriving him of his excuse to avoid conversation. Finley, Quinn, and Bo made the round on the walls to chat with the guards from Brevoy. They then noticed a new figure, an older man with an Erastilan symbol. When the group introduced themselves, he began telling them of a vision he had had on the road to aid their colony of a lost temple guarded by a bear - only to be interrupted by the party telling him they'd already killed the bear. After a moment's surprised silence, he asked if they might take him there that he may finish cleansing the place of its taint. They agreed and escorted him there and back without incident.

Notable Quotes
Quinn: I tell the bear he should just give up because he's worthless and will never amount to anything.
Bo: I feel bad, and I'm not even the bear!
Finley: I feel personally attacked, and I'm not even the bear.
Elum: Is this mockery or verbal assault?

GM: As Elum's ray strikes the bear, a fire elemental appears!
Elum: Dad?

Quinn: You're so fat, Sarenrae mistook you for the sun!

Bo: I don't want to live in the stinky holy place.
Elum: It's not stinky anymore.
Bo: I don't want to live in the holy place.
Quinn: It's no longer holy, we're here.
Bo: I don't want to live here.

Perlivash: ...okay. We look. menacingly glares down into Elum's face If Tyg gets hurt, I find you. big grin Bye-bye!
Finley-OOC: Awwwww, they're dating!
Elum: ...kinda scared now.

GM: At the hotspring, you see two grippli...and they immediately begin excitedly croaking in Grippli.
Grippli: Bo! Your mother and I have been worried sick!
Bo: OH GOD
Grippli: Who are these dryskins?
Quinn-OOC: That's racist.
Bo: They're annoying, don't worry about it.

GM: As the others finish in the hot spring, the gripplis wander off.
Quinn: What was that about?
Bo: I convinced them not to eat you.
Elum: ...Are those your parents?
Bo: NO. biffs bluff


5 people marked this as a favorite.

Part 5
"Can I pet the lizard?"

Setting out again, the group decided they'd neglected the west of Oleg's trading post and soon came across a ramshackle hut. Rhodo knocked on the door, and a wild-eyed-and-haired old man soon revealed himself...having crawled out the window at their knocking. After a rather surreal introduction, he introduced himself as Bokken, waving a pinkie-less hand at them. Elum asked if there was anything they could to help, and the old druid asked them to gather a basket of fangberries, to which they agreed...especially upon hearing about the 25% discount he was willing to offer on potions.

They decided to go due south, giving the bandit camp as wide a berth as possible, soon coming to a lightning-marred husk of a tree. Rhodo noticed the disturbed earth, and Elum pulled out the sketch recovered from the dead bandit. They discovered a small cache of goods beneath the roots and continued on, finding the burned out remnants of a house and a rope connected to what was clearly once a bridge. As they approached to inspect the rope, a rotten shape rose from the water. It spoke to them, requesting that they deliver the Stag Lord's corpse to him that he might at last find rest. The party agreed, wondering who the Stag Lord was but assuming he had something to do with the amulets they kept finding. Unwilling to leave behind their mounts, they continued along the river, finding an immense sycamore. Elum remembered a rumor that it was infested with mites, and Erza recalled the kobolds they had found at the radish patch had mentioned a problem with such. Bo piped up that he was pretty sure they needed cold iron to fight them, and they marked the tree on their maps to figure out later.

Their path finally took them to the fangberry patch, where Rhodo and Bo set to gathering berries, taking a slight beating from the thorns. This eventually disturbed a swarm of spiders which was summarily incinerated (along with a few branches), Elum quickly adding a ray of frost before the web-covered bushes could light the entire map aflame.

Successful in this latest endeavor, they began discussing a plan of attack on the bandit encampment, eyes turning to Quinn, who was once among their ranks...

Notable Quotes
Bo: Can I pet the lizard?

Elum: Is he high?

GM: You approach the Shrike River.
Elum: I don't like that name. We're changing it.

Rhodo: What happens if we throw the Stag Lord in the water?
Nettles: I can finally rest.
Finley: Just take a nap, idiot.
Rhodo, Elum: facepalm

Rhodo: Can we cross the river here?
GM: It looks like you can climb across the rope, yes.
Rhodo: Oh, no, my strength score!
Finley: Oh, no, my dog!


GM Bookwyrm wrote:

GM: You approach the Shrike River.

Elum: I don't like that name. We're changing it.

That kid definitely gets the Kingmaker spirit.


6 people marked this as a favorite.

Part 6
"I can't tell if this is a bluff or not."

The would-be colonists sat down to discuss their options, Quinn strongly objecting to plans ending with the death of the bandits she used to work with. She finally convinced them to let her go in first to talk them down. It was simple for her to lure the nearest guard over to talk...and for Bo to whammy him with a slumber hex for the others to tie up. She then made her way across the water to speak to the other bandits.

Kressle immediately grew suspicious of her sudden return, particularly since the bandits who had gone with Happs and Quinn had reported them killed and captured (probably dead), respectively. The bard began quickly spinning a story about how the clueless adventurers had let her escape because they were careless and actually believed she was on their side. Taking this in with a grain of salt, Kressle asked if she had any information about them, and Quinn took full advantage of an opportunity to complain at length about every single member of the party...and yet only giving a modicum of actually useful tactical information. Just close enough to catch the gist of this particular distraction, Elum and the others moved upstream to slip across...except for Rhodo, taking up position near the broken-down wagon with her crossbow.

The party crept through the treeline, only for Richie to move too loudly in his armor right as he approached the bandits. Noticing the archer atop the watchtower turn to take aim, Rhodo shot first, dropping the woman to 0 hp within a few rounds. A ray of fire from Elum struck Kressle next, and she immediately moved beside Quinn...though whether to protect the bard or turn on her was unclear. Quinn opted not to wait to find out and used her mockery against the bandit leader, throwing Kressle off-guard enough to destroy one of her axes on a bad swing. Immediate double 1's and the fumble deck. Fun times. Elum promptly greased the other, and it slipped easily out of Kressle's hands. Seizing the advantage, Quinn offered Kressle the chance to surrender. Humiliated enough by the dice's repeated betrayal, Kressle complied, raising her hands.

Without missing a beat, Elum and Rhodo set to looting the camp, finding the presumable spoils of the camp's last raid on Oleg's. Elum asked after Svetlana's ring, but the bandits declared that they'd been recently raided by mites. General disbelief was expressed, but the thieves stuck to the story. Exasperated, the group turned their attention to a case filled with liquor. Kressle called out to stop, that it was a special request of the Stag Lord's. Halfway through one bottle, Elum complied and insisted that this bottle was broken, oops. Unsure what to do with the group (particularly in the face of Quinn and Erza's reluctance to kill them), the party trekked back to Oleg's to figure it out.

Notable Quotes
Bo: I'll climb the watchtower, put him to sleep, then you can coup de grace him.
Rhodo: I like this plan.
Elum: Kill everyone silently? I like this.
Quinn: They're my friends!
Richie: We're your friends now!
Quinn: I'll just say I captured you.
Elum: Just me.
Finley: What, the rest of us are here to watch?
Bo: They don't know about us!
GM: About that. How quietly are you having this conversation?
All: AAAAAAAAH!

Quinn: Do what we say, or we kill your family. That's reasonable!

GM: ...do I need to get the talking stick?
Bo: NO.
Erza: YES.
Elum: We don't like the talking stick...

Quinn-OOC: Oh, no, the timer owl!
Elum-OOC: ADD MORE TIME
GM-OOC: You literally had all day to figure this out.
Elum-OOC: And we didn't!
Finley-OOC: Cause we're dumb!

GM: You hear voices... "Hey, Joe ain't at his post!"
Quinn: UM. deep voice Everything's fine! bluff
Kressle: .....If y'say so.

Quinn: So they trusted me unconditionally like idiots!
Elum-OOC: I can't tell if this is a bluff or not.
Finley-OOC: Wow, Quinn's really good at lying!
Quinn-OOC: .....yes. Lying.

GM: So how long do you just let Quinn sell you out to the bandits?
Finley: Forever.

Elum: Can I borrow your horse?
Rhodo: You are not taking Twilight Sparkle into battle!

Erza-OOC: I'm kinda insulted I haven't been mentioned.
Quinn: We got a couple humans. Pretty sure they're having an affair.
Erza, Richie: AAAAAAAAAAH EW
Quinn-OOC: What? You wanted to be mentioned.
Erza-OOC: NOT LIKE THIS

Quinn: I mock Kressle. Everyone thinks you're a joke!
Finley, Bo: gasp

Rhodo-OOC: Can I take this one off the map since she's out of the fight?
GM-OOC: Sure. pause as Rhodo reaches for the marker and starts doodling You can just mark where she was with an X.
Rhodo-OOC: But I want a pool of blood...


Quote:
Quinn: Do what we say, or we kill your family. That's reasonable!
Quote:

Rhodo-OOC: Can I take this one off the map since she's out of the fight?

GM-OOC: Sure. pause as Rhodo reaches for the marker and starts doodling You can just mark where she was with an X.
Rhodo-OOC: But I want a pool of blood...

Spoken like a true murder-hobo!


1 person marked this as a favorite.

I should note that Quinn's comment was actually a sarcastic remark in protest of the murderhobo policy. For some reason, the ex-bandit didn't want to murder the bandits she used to work with.


5 people marked this as a favorite.

Part 7
"If we'd just left them alone, they probably would've killed themselves."

Leaving the bandits behind at Oleg's to figure out later, the group made their way back to the Old Sycamore to deal with the mites. They passed by a cave, which Rhodo's sharp eyes soon spotted, and they led the others down to explore it. Richie and Bo's combined efforts identified a vein of gold, and the group eagerly noted this on their map to harvest later.

Entering the cavern beneath the roots, they were soon greeted with the curious sight of a pair of hideous blue creatures firing caltrops into each other's mouths with crude hand-catapults. Sheldon fired a shot into the wall, and it took little time to dispatch the mites. Finley poked her head into a side chamber, calling out for backup. As the group rushed in, they noticed a barely-alive kobold tied to the wall, surrounded by more mites, and quickly moved to interrupt the mites' torture session. The fight went well for the would-be colonists until they faced the final mite and proceeded to roll five natural-1's in a row though no confirmed fumbles while it sat dazed at 1 hp before Cujo finally killed it.

Rhodo and Finley helped the kobold, now healed from Erza's channeling, down from the wall while the priestess relayed introductions. Through her, he introduced himself as Mikmek of Sootscale and thanked the party for their aid, looking sadly at the three kobolds they had been too late to save. He asked if they would assist him in recovering the holy statue he had come to find, and the party agreed (Sheldon enthusiastically so when treasure was promised).

Notable Quotes
Rhodo: I give Sheldon a Look because we didn't have any reason to kill them!
DM: You're a mite irritated?
All: groans

Finley: Every time I use my warhammer, I mess it up! 19

Rhodo: If we'd left [the mites] alone, they probably would've killed themselves!
Sheldon: Can I have one of the catapults?


6 people marked this as a favorite.

Part 8
"I have learned the true power of hands today."

Continuing into the cavern beneath the sycamore, the group pressed on. Rhodo brought up the rear, keeping Mikmek behind them while they kept their crossbow to hand. Not wanting to cross the chasm due to a general inability to climb, the party backtracked through the first chamber and into the other pathway.

They discovered a series of compost piles filled with eggs, guarded by three centipedes and a mite. Elum immediately used burning hands to destroy one of the nest/piles. A short fight later, Mikmek began stabbing the unhatched eggs with surprising ferocity as the others moved on to the next chamber. Six more mites waited within. Elum greased a portion of the floor as the others rushed in, causing several mites to slip and fall while Erza, Rhodo, and Sheldon picked them off from range. Quinn gleefully ignored the language barrier, pulling faces and blowing raspberries to convey her opinion of the mites. Richie walked up and simply splattered the fey as they attempted to attack him, eagerly assisted by Finley.

This chamber yielded to another, and Elum and Sheldon led the way inside, finding more mites and a giant tick. The mite leader barked an order none of the party understood, and the fighting resumed. As the others trickled in, Richie barely making the acrobatics check to pass through the grease, the mites were quickly brought down. Quinn switched to rude gestures before simply clawing the tick. Spell, arrow, hammer, and sword combined to finally quell the mite infestation.

Mikmek eagerly ran to the mites' planning table to claim the ivory figurine with reverence, calling it Old Sharptooth. Noting the paper it held down, the party realized none of them could read Undercommon. Mikmek obligingly translated, revealing a score tally of sorts between the Sycamore mites and the Sootscale kobolds...noting that the Sootscales' spoils of war included a "shiny human ring." Elum looked irritated enough to catch fire. Mikmek thanked them and asked them to come with them, for Chief Sootscale would be very pleased they had saved Old Sharptooth...

Notable Quotes
Quinn: sees mite picture Wow, it's not gonna be hard to insult these things.

GM: All right, fumble. You deal damage to yourself, using your target's strength modifier. ...The mite swings at Sheldon and stabs itself, knocking it unconscious.
Sheldon: I'm counting that one.

Richie: I move into the other room to attack!
GM: Elum, did you dismiss your grease?
Elum: Nope. I moved along the wall.
Richie: I hate you so much.

Quinn: Um...mockery! I flip off the mites!
GM: They seem to understand this.

Mikmek: relayed through Erza This says Us, and this is Them. But them is us because mites aren't very smart.
Finley: We get it.
Mikmek: Okay! Us, so them, have spears and some coin and kobold staute. That Old Sharptooth! Them, so us, have lots coin and shiny human ring.
Elum: Are you kidding me?!
Mikmek: No, that what it says.

GM: Tickleback takes...13 points of damage from your crit.
Quinn: It's called Nickleback?!
GM: I did just have you look at this photograph...
Finley: No.

Quinn: I run in and claw the tick! Nat20
Elum: I take out a notebook and write this down.
Quinn: I have learned the true power of hands today.


1 person marked this as a favorite.
GM Bookwyrm wrote:


Rhodo: If we'd left [the mites] alone, they probably would've killed themselves!
Sheldon: Can I have one of the catapults?

I, too, wanted one of the catapults. Alas, I was denied. Apparently the rest of the party thought I would use it for Evil.

.
..
...
They might have been right.


1 person marked this as a favorite.

My players recruited the mites. And Kressel's crew. (They left Bydon alive, though.) They also recruited the kobolds. I rolled some boggards on a random encounter table and the players recruited one of those, because one of them spoke boggard. I don't think they've encountered an enemy yet that they haven't tried recruiting.


6 people marked this as a favorite.

Part 9
"Did we end a war?"

Escorted by Mikmek, the group entered the Sootscale mines and were promptly greeted by another kobold called Nakpik. Mikmek's presence made introductions smooth, and Erza translated a brief conversation about the mite in a cage. Nakpik explained it was a warning to other mites; Elum's comment that the mites were all dead prompted a gleeful Mikmek to spear the unfortunate fey with perhaps too wide a grin. Erza stared in horror; no one else seemed fazed. The kobolds, chattering happily about having Sharptooth back, led the party past a series of pits and to Chief Sootscale.

Mikmek and Nakpik rushed to introduce the party; Elum relieved to find the chieftain relatively fluent in Common. After a brief exchange of pleasantries, Sootscale demanded the statue. He held it for a moment, thoughtful...and promptly smashed it to bits, declaring the curse broken to a horrified Mikmek and Nakpik. He then raised his club, announcing they would kill the usurper. Quinn and Elum demanded an explanation, earning a brief story about the shaman Tartuk and his constant attempts to take over the tribe through a supposed curse. Quinn insisted on talking to Tartuk first, earning prestidigitationed yellow skin and a declaration of cursedness for her efforts.

Tartuk promptly went on the offensive...and just as promptly was obliterated by a max-rolled sneak attack from Sootscale and a nasty crit from Mikmek before half the party had gotten to take a turn. They wasted no time in looting the shaman's body for valuables, coming across Svetlana's ring almost by accident. Some quick negotiation left the kobold clan with most of the shinies but let the party take the actual magic gear, securing an alliance of sorts with the little lizards.

The ring safely in hand, they finally made their way back to Oleg's, finding the bandits in good shape, if fairly gloomy from the forced labor and constant supervision. Erza spent some time chatting the bandits up while Elum returned the ring to a speechless Oleg. Quinn went to talk to Kressle, hoping to patch things up after the incident at the camp, managing to smooth things over relatively well. This paved the way quite well for Elum to offer Kressle a job, which she accepted, seeing it as probably her best option. Finley, meanwhile, spent some time teaching Cujo to read...before giving up and merely training him to bark on command at books to pretend to read.

Notable Quotes
Elum-OOC: Did we end a war?
GM: Well, you eradicated one side, so...

Erza: I don't like genocide...
Finley: You're gonna learn to love it.

Finley: Can we keep Mikmek? beat Not...like he's an animal. Don't quote that.

Elum: What's so scary about Tartuk?
Nakpik: Tartuk shaman. Have power of gods and bring anger on us.
Sootscale: Is okay. We have help.
Quinn: You mean meatshields?
Elum: Richie!

Quinn: Kressle, you were like my mom. My weird mom who tried to kill me with axes. Maybe not my mom. My aunt. My cool aunt. Anyway, Aunt Kressle, I'm sorry I betrayed the entire family.
GM: Yeah, I'm gonna need a diplomacy check.

Elum: I give back Kressle's handaxes.
Kressle: You're a trustin' soul, aintcha? swings the axe, stopping mere centimeters before Elum's face Made ya flinch.
Elum: ...we're gonna get along fine.

Finley: I'm gonna start a book club with my dog.


Quote:

Erza: I don't like genocide...

Finley: You're gonna learn to love it.

A true Kingmaker spirit!


6 people marked this as a favorite.

Part 10
"Mr. Orlovsky, I don't feel so good..."

Out of other ideas and feeling confident, the party gathered their allies (specifically Kressle and Mikmek) and began the march to the Stag Lord's fort. Kressle and Quinn filled them in on what they knew of the Stag Lord, mostly that he was a creepy drunkard, and the plan was set - they'd let Kressle talk their way inside as she had the passcode and deliver the recovered alcohol. Elum mused about the possibility of poison, and Mikmek produced a vial of spider venom without bothering to explain where he'd found it. The sorcerer suggested spreading it among all six bottles. Mikmek asked how big the Stag Lord was, and Quinn and Kressle's relayed description prompted the kobold to shrug and empty the vial into one bottle to be sure. The kobold then insisted Elum's clothes were too fine, and the rest of the party urged him on until Elum gave in and rolled in the mud to better blend in.

Getting inside was surprisingly simple. Kressle relayed the passcode and was let inside without incident, being a known figure amongst the banditry. Dovan was quick to make some snide remarks about the new recruits, particularly the "pretty boy." However, he waved them along to Akiros once he saw they had the shipment of booze, deeming the situation not his problem.

Akiros was largely too tired to care much, noting Kressle's presence and the alcohol as normal. He knocked on the Stag Lord's door and thus had a front-row seat to the bandit leader's downing of the poisoned bottle d6 didn't like him. Rhodo rushed in to deliver a flurry of blows; Elum shouted a warning to Akiros to get out of the way. Akiros instead took advantage of the opportunity to take out months of rage and frustration on his drunkard of a boss. Stumbling backward, the Stag Lord aimed his bow at the halfling, killing them in a single shot.

Bo seized the opportunity to consecutively daze the Stag Lord for the next several rounds. Elum shouted for the bandits that the Stag Lord was on "another rampage," hoping to sow discord amongst the ranks. Dovan, meanwhile, freed the caged owlbear in the center of the complex, actually sowing discord amongst the ranks. Quinn began throwing down mockery at everyone in range. Richie and Finley stepped into melee with the bandit lord, hoping to avenge their fallen comrade.

Dovan, noting the mage off by himself, stepped over and greeted him with a friendly impalement, thus somewhat stabilizing the situation and causing the panicking bandits to rally to him...in a perfect radius for Elum to create pit. Richie's sword, Finley's hammer, Sheldon's arrows, and Akiros' betrayal meanwhile brought the Stag Lord to a final end...and everyone's rides brought the combat to an abrupt pause.

Notable Quotes
Elum: Okay, we're too broke to craft any wondrous items.
Quinn: So, when do we get our rod of wonder?
GM: Oh, God.
Rhodo: Didn't we just get 1000 gold from Oleg?
Elum: In store credit.
Quinn: Guys, we got a gift card.

Quinn: Can the Stag Lord be my dad?
GM: You really don't want that...

Elum: Can we poison the alcohol?
Bo: I don't have any.
Mikmek: holds up a vial
Quinn: Mikmek is my idol.

Kressle: Let me do the talking.
Guard: Who goes there?
Bo: Your mom.
Kressle: ...by the bloody bones of St. Gilmorg, who wants to know?

Dovan: eyes Elum You brought in a girly one.
Elum: NO.
Quinn: She cut her hair so people would think she's a boy.
Finley: That sounds familiar.
Quinn: Shut up; you don't know!

GM: Akiros rages and swings his sword-
Finley: AT WHO?
GM: -at the Stag Lord.
Quinn: YES! We got the hot guy!

Rhodo: Well. I'm dead.
Finley: RHODO, NO!
Bo: MISTER ORLOVSKY, I DON'T FEEL SO GOOD

Dovan: stabs Elum
Elum: DUDE. What was that for?
Dovan: Some people just like to watch the world burn.
Elum: starts cackling
GM: I'm going to regret having him say that, aren't I?
All: YES.

Elum: Reload last save point! RELOAD LAST SAVE POINT!


1 person marked this as a favorite.

Sorry, kid. SAVE FILE CORRUPTED. CONTINUE? Y/N


4 people marked this as a favorite.
John Napier 698 wrote:
Sorry, kid. SAVE FILE CORRUPTED. CONTINUE? Y/N

May my people be free to live.

N.


4 people marked this as a favorite.

Part 11
"Mistakes were made."

The battle raged on, everyone now quite concerned about the matter of the rampaging owlbear. Akiros ran to engage it, followed by Finley. Dovan performed an acrobatic leap to escape the pit, only to be immediately shoved back in by Elum...closely followed by the owlbear at Finley's urging, as Akiros shoulder-checked the beast into the pit...crushing one of the unfortunates beneath its weight.

Dovan once again leaped out, rolling a very high acrobatics check. The bandits panicked and began attacking the creature. Elum then had a wonderful, awful idea. To gain their trust, he leaped into the pit, intending to crush the creature...only to fumble the landing and do more damage to himself. He immediately read off the scroll of fly they had recovered, running out of actions to escape. The owlbear lunged for him...faceplanting into the wall. Sheldon shot the thing; Bo reached over the pit and pulled Elum to safety before the bandits could treat the ifrit like a noble pinata.

Akiros, meanwhile, drew his bow and took a potshot at Dovan, denouncing him as a monster. This did not stop Quinn from arguing for Dovan's redemption mostly because she had decided he strongly resembled Maxim from Girl Genius and must therefore be awesome. This did not stop anyone in the party from ignoring her pleas because they thought it was funny.

Elum wandered to the other side of the pit to cast burning hands on the unfortunates within. Dovan evaded the flames; the rest were not so lucky, one dying outright. The pit then vanished, leaving Elum standing beside two very injured, very angry bandits. Richie, exasperated, charged over to save his employer, putting the first bandit out of his misery. Erza, equally exasperated, healed him from his self-inflicted misadventure. Sheldon sniped the other bandit, and Akiros charged Dovan, knocking him out. In the confusion, the two bandits who had managed to not fall into the pit fled into the wilderness.

Now that things had calmed, Akiros asked Kressle and Quinn what was going on. The situation was explained, and Akiros immediately tried to coup de grace Dovan, flat-out refusing to work with the man. Elum shrugged and borrowed Richie's sword to do the job. They poked around a bit further, and then made their way to the basement, where an odd man waited. Upon seeing strangers, he immediately called forth a swarm of spiders...

Notable Quotes
Quinn: It is Maxim! We need hats!

Finley: Akiros, push it in!
GM: He bullrushes it, and...it lands on a bandit, taking...5 points of falling damage and crushing one of the bandits.
Quinn: NOT DOVAN!
GM: He's not in the pit.
Elum: For now...
Quinn: I SWEAR, IF YOU PUSH HIM BACK IN...

GM: ....okay, you...jump into the pit and land on the owlbear. Reflex save.
Elum: ...10.
GM: You take 5 points of falling damage and provoke an attack of opportunity...

GM: Elum, it is your turn. The pit will vanish after you finish.
Elum: I move to the edge of the pit and cast burning hands.
GM: All right, that kills one of them and leaves two barely alive. Dovan takes no damage. And the pit vanishes. erases, leaving two bandits standing right next to him
Elum: ...mistakes were made. Richie!

Elum: Richie, come get me!
Richie: If only it wasn't my job to save you!


4 people marked this as a favorite.

Part 12
"Yeet the body."

Elum responded to the spiders with a call for peace, but the mad old man did not appear interested in listening. Bo gave the madman the evil eye; Finley and Richie charged him, and Sheldon fired his bow. Finley's hammer broke the man's concentration, causing the spiders to gradually dissipate. In response, the man took the only logical course of action and turned into a wolverine, nipping futilely at Cujo's legs. Erza channeled while Elum abandoned diplomacy, hurling fire at the druid. The druid snarled and headbutted Cujo...knocking himself out. Finley promptly smashed his head in for attacking the dog.

They wasted little time in looting the place from top to bottom, making it a special priority to unmask the Stag Lord. There was some disappointment expressed when no one knew the man beneath, though Bo and Finley commented on how ugly he was. They also found a curious glass ring filled with what appeared to be hair, though unusually green. Etched into the ring was a strange creature that Bo and Elum could identify as a dragon, though not what kind. The sorcerer promptly claimed it. Their latest recruit in tow, they carried the body to Nettle's Crossing in fulfillment of the dead man's final wish, earning his +1 ranseur for their troubles.

Their explorations of the Greenbelt continued largely without incident over the next few weeks, until finally, they found something of concern. It appeared at first to be a dead horse, but closer inspection revealed it to be a unicorn with its horn snapped off. Erza's examinations revealed it to have been done post-mortem...and likely through magical means, given the lack of visible wound. The mages determined the likely spell to have been a finger of death, far, far beyond any of their capabilities. But that was a concern for another day, for word of the Stag Lord's defeat had reached Brevoy, and the fledgling colony was deemed ready to begin!

If only they had any idea what to name the place.

End Chapter 1

Notable Quotes
Elum: Is the wolverine holding anything?
GM: A grudge?

Finley: Can I pierce Cujo's ears?

Elum: Does he respond to my diplomacy?
GM: As he is a wolverine, he does not speak.

Richie; Come on, let's unmask the stag guy.
Finley: Just like Scooby-Doo!

Elum: Can I ring the bell?
Richie: Come on! Just yeet the body into the stupid river already!
Elum: I'm trying to make it-
Finley; Yeet the body!

GM: So, we'll have a year time skip.
Elum: I'm talking to Kressle. I'm gonna make her my queen.
Richie: Can she cut his heart in half with her axe?
GM: More of a third date thing.


4 people marked this as a favorite.

I am apparently further out of date with teenager slang than I thought.


2 people marked this as a favorite.

Welcome to my life.


1 person marked this as a favorite.

Marvy fab. Sounds like a gas. It's really boss. Don't bogart all the fun, man. Let's pull a brody and burn rubber in my cherry woody.


5 people marked this as a favorite.

As some of the roster is very hit-and-miss, we've got a new player to add to the insanity as well as a replacement for a fallen comrade! Introducing:
Tetric Shadowbane, gnome sniper, and Ramses Rarifiersh, tiefling zen archer/kineticist.

Chapter 2 - Rivers Run Red
Part 1-2
"Let's just be communists."

With the successful defeat of the Stag Lord, nothing stood in the way of the founding of a new colony, and thus was born the fair land of Arcus, with the capital begun at the Stag Fort, now dubbed Pluvius. Their first year went quite well, marked with several periods of economic boom and visiting celebrities and marred only slightly by a small fire at their shrine and some bandit activity from the few escapees from the Stag Lord's forces. These incidents were swiftly contained, and all as well. So well, in fact, that a halfling couple, the Rezbins, set off to found the nearby town of Tatzylford.

Then came winter.

Young Baron Orlovsky had written home to let his parents know that he had not, in fact, screwed up and embarrassed them, thank you very much, also making it clear that he had romantic intentions in regard to Kressle, one of the reformed bandits. This obviously Would Not Do, and his parents arrived to settle the matter. The arguing dragged on into the next month, reaching the level of public scandal before Elum simply evicted his father from the country. To cap matters off, a troublemaker attempted to stab Warden Kesten Garess in the night, only to be killed in the attempt himself.

Kesten came to the next council meeting demanding more funds for proper city defense and patrols. Treasurer Oleg Leveton shouted him down, citing a lack of funds. No resolution was reached, and the kobold Nakpik met the council as the meeting let out to invite them - quite urgently - to a meeting at the Sootscale warren. They made their way out there only to receive a boisterous greeting from an immense troll.

Sootscale introduced Elum as the "fire baron," to which Hargulka laughed, only later explained when Sootscale referred to him as the "fire-eater." Hargulka explained that he had made an overture of alliance to the kobolds to prevent them having to be forced to adapt into human ways, eschewing their draconic heritage. Elum and Quinn moved to allay Sootscale's fears, and Sootscale merely answered he would need more time to make a decision. Hargulka and his retinue departed...followed by Ramses' owl. The poor bird soon found Hargulka's invisible sentry as the wisp shocked it within an inch of its life before Ramses ordered it to flee. Elum immediately called a council meeting to get the tiny country prepared for proper defense.

The next month fared little better. Nearby farmers reported sabotage on their crops. Much of the council set out to personally investigate. Ramses found a series of canine tracks, at least one set of which was far larger than a dog or wolf should be. Nonetheless, they tracked them to a hillside cave a fair walk north of Pluvius.

Tetric sneaked inside, promptly startling a trio of shrieker mushrooms, which alerted the worgs within of the intruders. An immense elder worg approached, soon identified as Howl of the North Wind. With Elum back at the castle, Quinn made an attempt to win the beast over to their side, faring quite well until fumbling a bluff about Hargulka's eventual betrayal of the pack. The bard was promptly knocked into negatives and just as promptly dragged to safety and healed.

The beast and his pack were eventually brought to heel with no further loss of life to the young country's founders. Thus was the food crisis resolved, but the looming threat of the troll remained along with anything else fate might devise for them...

Notable Quotes
Elum-OOC: Ramses? Are you our cook?
Finley-OOC: Haha, Gordon Ramsay.
Elum-OOC: Actually, what's your cooking score?

GM: Your shrine to Cayden Cailean caught fire, but you were able to contain it.
Elum: Okay, who forgot the beer offering?
Bo, Finley: fingers on nose

Bo: Let's just become communists.

Ramses: We've gotten farther than you have with this. What do you know?
Elum, Finley: whispers loudly Don't piss off Oleg.
Ramses: ...so you're just going to tell us when we screw up?
Oleg: Works for most kids. Worked for mine.
Elum: Wait, you have KIDS? How have I not known this?
Oleg: Y'never asked.
Finley: We're your kids now.

Quinn: Enemies to the west, the south, the everywhere! I'm SORRY.

Quinn: So, am I your nephew now? Because Kressle's totally my aunt.
GM: Does Kressle know you're engaged?
Elum: Yes.

Quinn: Can we just note that Ramses and the Owl is like the coolest band name?

Elum: Ramses, what is your job?
Ramses: My job is to advise you-
Elum: So why are you out on the farm?
Ramses: Because I advised you to come out here!

Finley: Can Cujo talk to the wolves?
GM: Cujo has 2 intelligence.
Quinn: Never related more to a character in my life.

GM: Are you sure they're wolves?
Finley: They're furries.
Quinn: OH NO.

Howl: You may call me Howl of the North Wind.
Quinn: I am Quinn DuBois, and I am here on behalf of...where are we from again?
Ramses, Bo: facepalm

Quinn: Are they just going to trip every turn?
Ramses: They've got sentry mushrooms. Of course they're tripping.
Bo: ...Can I evil eye you?


Using Dudemeister's changes to Rivers Run Red?

- Edit to avoid doublepost -

We can add Akiros, Nugrah, many of the bandits from the Stag Lord's fort, and a randomly encountered wyvern to the list of everything and everyone that my players have recruited. The one who speaks boggard wants to stage an expedition to the Hooktongue Slough to find more, since the one they've got is so useful.


Some of them! I'm streamlining and omitting quite a bit because I have a huge party (which means everything takes longer) and need to get them a satisfactory story conclusion before school lets out for summer.

They almost got Howl. If that bluff check had gone better (Quinn rolled low, no one aided, and Howl opposed with a nat19), they very well might have.


My players are just wrapping up the first book (they beat the Stag Lord, now they're tying up some loose ends), I'm planning on using Dudemeister's changes, too.

Knowing my players, they'll probably wind up brokering some sort of peace with the trolls, though . . . unless I make them really hateable, like I did with Falgrim Sneeg. (Then again, they recruited the mites . . . though I think the player who spoke undercommon was just desperate for minions of any sort at that point, since most everyone else had flunkies.)


3 people marked this as a favorite.

Part 3-4
"Hello, fellow tree!"

Time passed, and the farms recovered from Howl's attacks. Things were going well...mostly. Oleg arrived at the next month's council meeting with a sterner than usual expression and announced a problem with a thief. This prompted the usual argument from Kesten about funding defense, leading into the shopkeeper wondering when the party planned to annex his land so he could also be legally guarded. After some bickering, Quinn, Ramses, and Finley went to investigate. Akiros, having taken up good, honest work guarding the trading post since the Stag Lord incident, greeted them with raccoon-like eyes and explained that the thief was too fast to see and kept leaving glitter behind...as well as a small pile of wildflowers.

Suspicions aroused, the trio set up for a stakeout, ordering Cujo on point by the door. Their suspicions were confirmed when a crashing from within the store revealed Perlivash, having invisibly flown by them, now cornered by an excessively friendly dog. Perlivash explained that the "mean big-biggins" had taken Tyg to the "scary fairy lady" and told him he had to steal from the newly-forged colony to ensure her safety. However, the little dragon announced, he had not been stealing because he liked the party, opting to trade instead.

Not bothering to explain the semantics difference, they just asked Perlivash to take them to the scary lady. Perlivash claimed he didn't know, or he would've already gotten Tyg back. With some skepticism, they wracked their brains to recall any rumors of fey in the area. After bombing their knowledge checks, they followed up on Perlivash's mention of the new-new place, Tatzylford. There, they learned that a dryad had been seen not terribly far from the village.

Arriving in the dryad's grove, Quinn and Finley were quickly smitten by the beautiful fey, to much eye-rolling from Ramses. Perlivash then ruined the mood by stating that this wasn't the scary lady; she was nice. The dryad, identifying herself as Tiressia, seized the opportunity: if the party would do her a small favor, she could direct them to the demesne of their prey. Quinn agreed before waiting for details, met immediately with glares upon learning this favor was to find and kill a scythe tree...which none of them rolled well enough to know anything about other than "the name sounded bad."

They regrouped and set out, Ramses staying behind and Elum in his place. It didn't take long to find the trail of the tree...or the enormous tree itself. Bo and Quinn quickly fled up a smaller tree to hide. Elum confidently stepped forward to shoot a burning arc at it...and discovered that big trees have quite a long reach, getting knocked down to single digits almost immediately. Bo misfortuned the tree after gleefully discovering that this, unlike his Evil Eye, was not mind-affecting, which undoubtedly saved the group as it forced three crits to be negated and turned two hits into outright fumbles.

Finley charged forward...only to be reminded that her warhammer was useless due to the tree's DR. She did, however, force it to keep its attention on her as Quinn rushed in to claw it while Elum continued to set it on fire. Bo, meanwhile, cackled in the background while hopping around to cast cure light wounds.

The great tree eventually fell...literally, thanks to a fumble card that knocked it prone. Quinn finished it off with an alchemist's fire. They attemped to loot it, finding nothing, and Elum declared they needed to recover the wood for a project. This was amended to sending the guards out to recover the wood when Quinn, Finley, and Bo essentially told him what he could do with said wood. They returned to Tiressia's grove, and the grateful dryad upheld her end of the bargain, giving them directions to the tower of the fey known only as the Dancing Lady...

Notable Quotes
Quinn: Oleg, we have mushrooms! Problem solved!

Ramses: Can I just carry our flag around so Perlivash stops sitting on my head?

Quinn: Our flag is just a rainbow.
Elum: No, a white flag.
GM: Surrender?
Elum: Exactly.

Tiressia: What has brought you to my home?
Quinn: THOSE LEGS.

Quinn: Elum is Kuzco.
GM: What I'm hearing is that I need more baleful polymorph.

Quinn: Hello, fellow tree!
GM: What languages do you speak?
Quinn: Um...Common and Aklo.
GM: The tree cannot understand you.
Quinn: Where's Erza? She'd know how to talk to a stupid tree!

Bo: Can we loot the tree?
GM: ....what?
Quinn: There's gotta be stuff! Herbs and things!
GM: You...burned it to death.
Elum: I'm making my throne out of it.
GM: It's on fire.

Tiressia: A bargain is a bargain. For your aid, I will point you to the demesne of the Dancing Lady.
Quinn: Oh, that doesn't sound too bad.


1 person marked this as a favorite.
Quote:

Tiressia: A bargain is a bargain. For your aid, I will point you to the demesne of the Dancing Lady.

Quinn: Oh, that doesn't sound too bad.

Dun dun dunnnnnnnnnnnnnn!


2 people marked this as a favorite.

Part 5-6
"Just throw us the healer!"

The intrepid colonists made their way through the forest on Tiressia's guidance, Perlivash perched, per usual, atop the tallest person present, in this case, Ramses. In response, Ramses summoned his void owl, Archimedes, to sit atop his head instead. Perl then sat on Archimedes instead.

They eventually came across the keep, a crumbling wreck of what was once a fine tower. As they approached the gate, Bo urged his familiar to go first and test the waters...the poor creature barely managing to hop back in time to avoid the grate crashing down. After a few moments of panic, they regrouped and made their way around the wall to a hole in the fortifications and stepped through. For a moment, Quinn thought she saw something, a small greenish man, but upon a second look, there was nothing there.

Now intensely paranoid, Finley and Erza moved forward, leaving Bo and Quinn back at their makeshift entrance. Nothing happened. Quinn stepped cautiously forward. The creature, Rigg, promptly raced in to shank the bard, who promptly identified him as a quickling. Erza attempted to shoot him, but missed. Bo spat forth a swarm of spiders on the angry fey...who stood still as the vermin skittered over him with minimal effect on his DR and vanished from view. Unsure where he'd gone, the party stood in silence for several rounds as the squishy casters hurried to their hardier companions. Quinn then recalled what had been learned about how their invisibility worked and lobbed a glitterdust where Bo's now-dismissed swarm had been, outlining the angry little man in bright sparkles.

Their target unable to hide, the group readied their assault...only for the malignant fey to levitate just out of reach above them. Quinn suggested he come down and kill them, and he bombed his save. They tore into him...to some effect, given they hadn't thought to bring cold iron weaponry. Quinn renewed the glitterdust with much yelling from the party barely missed by the puff of sparkles. This time, he failed his save and went blind, making it much easier for them to hit him. After a solid round of taking damage, Rigg opted to eat the attacks of opportunity, which took a good chunk off thanks to some critting, and fled into the forest.

Their path was clear now to enter the tower, where Quinn promptly spotted and recovered a canister of insanity mist rigged at the entrance. The bard then declared dibs and pocketed the weaponized hallucinogen. Finding nothing else of interest, they made their way upstairs, where they saw an eerily beautiful elven woman clad in a robe of pure white...and a troll. Seeing food, the lady began to dance. Quinn, Bo, and Ramses saved against the effect, and Quinn additionally identified her as a baobhan sith...a vampiric fey. Safe from the enchantment, Quinn hurled out her mockery as usual. Bo climbed along the wall, attempting to hex her...only to discover that fey have good will saves. Ramses shot her. The troll leapt out the window and sprinted off to report to Hargulka.

The Lady used her entangle ability to lock the party down while she tried to reach Bo. Ramses continued turning her into a pincushion, finally breaking her concentration enough to allow Richie, Erza, and Finley to reenter the fight. Rather than tangle with the terrain, Richie lobbed Finley across the room, where she promptly rolled a 2 to hit the murderous fey. She began dancing again, and Finley and Richie failed again, allowing her to feed upon the helpless halfling.

Wanting to help, Quinn threw out another glitterdust on the Lady...and Finley. Both saved. Ramses continued to laugh at the terrain and keep shooting. The Lady, gravely wounded, stopped dancing to retreat, and Finley took advantage of her regained senses to smack her upside the kneecap with her hammer, bringing her into negatives. Some spiteful kicking of the corpse may or may not have ensued during the looting.

Looking about the room, Ramses spotted what had initially appeared to be a paper lantern but now, out of the haze of combat, was clearly a floral-made cage. He sent Archimedes to bring it down, and within was a familiar grig. Tyg was freed; Perlivash was overjoyed. After they finished taking everything that wasn't nailed down (including an elixir of love that the archer found, took one look at the party, and pocketed without telling the others), they made their way back to Pluvius.

Kesten greeted them, obviously glad to see them. He informed them that while they had been dealing with Oleg's concerns, one of their colonists, Jenna Tannersen, had come to beg for aid - her son, Tim, had gone missing. Kesten, however, had taken some of his guards to locate the boy and successfully recovered him from a nearby tribe of lizardfolk. However, there were some other things that they should attend to personally...

Notable Quotes
GM: He begins to float.
Quinn: He's a disco ball!
Bo: ...I hate you.

Erza: I fire my crossbow. 2
GM: The bolt shoots off into the sky...and you hear a distant squawk.
Erza: looks horrified I want to go find and heal it!
Quinn: still bleeding from Rigg Don't you dare.

Finley: He's probably throwing us discus-style.

Quinn: Why are you stumbling around like that; are you drunk or something?

GM: She begins to dance, and I need a will save from everyone...at a -2 penalty if you find her attractive.
Half the party: AAAAAAAAAAH!
Quinn: Is this entire fight just revenge for last campaign? Nat 20 AAAAAAAAAAAH!

Finley: If you blind me, I'm gonna punch you.

GM: And the dancing lady drinks some of Finley's blood as she bites her, dealing...2 strength and 2 con damage.
Ramses: How long does the difficult terrain last?
GM: Um...minute per level. So...yes.
Quinn: RICHIE. THROW US THE HEALER. WE'LL CATCH.


3 people marked this as a favorite.

Part 7
"If he says anything about me, I'm gonna punch him."

Kesten produced three letters for the council to review - a friendly one from Maegar Varn expressing a hope for positive trade relations, a somewhat generic one from Hannis Drelev...or, at least, his secretary, and a rather imposing one bearing no signature but the personal crest of Castruccio Irovetti, carrying no threat but an overall tone of incredulity that they'd lasted so long. They mulled these over a bit, Kesten suggesting they offer some measure of hospitality...and Oleg wondering how much this would bleed the treasury.

The conversation then turned to a concerning rumor - people, including some of Kesten's guards when dealing with the lizardfolk, had seen strange lights on Candlemere Island. Worse, there were concerns about people missing...and at least one report of seeing the bloodshot eye of Gyronna. Quinn, at this, began to get fidgety, arguing that someone else should look into the matter as hags were "not really my thing." Before this could be questioned, Bo hopped to the window to investigate a noise.

Standing in the town square, the grippli spied a portly man speaking to a crowd in a loud, agitated voice...about how the lords of Arcus had failed them, neglected their duty. As the others came to the window to listen, tempers flared as the man dissected every complaint he could devise - the council's constant travels away from the city on what he deemed fools' errands, the baron's courtship of the known criminal Kressle and overall rumored temper, and likeliness to "burn me where I stand if he could hear this," keeping one of Kressle's lackeys about to spy on the country, not to mention the kobolds, Bo, and Ramses merely existing as well as casting doubt on Erza's faith.

Finley was about to lob her hammer at him when Quinn hurried outside to speak with him...and promptly opened by offering him a job. He, Grigori, deflected the question and continued to question the rulers' competence. Quinn, however, proved the more charismatic, especially with the rest of the council working the crowd and aiding another, and as the crowd turned on the rabble-rouser, they escorted him inside to escape the wrath of the crowd (though there still did seem some discontent regarding Kressle...) discuss possible employment upon their return.

The situation in town handled for the moment, they set out for Candlemere Island to investigate this supposed cult. Immediately upon landing, they found themselves facing one of the lights, which Quinn identified as a will-o-wisp...

Notable Quotes
Finley: If he says anything about me, I'm gonna punch him.

Quinn: I thought this was a battle of wits, but you appear unarmed!
Finley, Bo, Erza, Sheldon: OOOOOOOOOOH

Quinn: Can we hire him?
Bo: NO
Finley: He can be in charge of education; I've literally got the worst plan, anyway.
Quinn: ...why are you saying this IN PUBLIC.

Quinn: Then if you think we need guidance, perhaps join us! nat 20 with aid anothers equaling 42
All: OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH
Finley: Get sniped!
GM: It's a diplomacy check...

Community / Forums / Gamer Life / Gaming / Campaign Journals / Checks and Imbalances - A Kingmaker Story All Messageboards

Want to post a reply? Sign in.
Recent threads in Campaign Journals