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My current LEAST-favorite Christmas song?
"Mary Did You Know".
How stupid does a carol really need to be? It beats out "Little Drummer Boy" on the lyric idiocy meter.
YES. YES SHE KNEW. THE SODDING ANGEL TOLD HER. IT WAS CALLED THE ANNUNCIATION AND THERE ARE LITERALLY DOZENS OF LUMINOUS RENAISSANCE PAINTINGS DEVOTED TO THE SUBJECT. MARY KNEW. END OF DISCUSSION.
Now can we please get back to "Baby It's Cold Outside"?
I see your "Baby It's Cold Outside" and raise you "Christmas Shoes."
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Umm...I had my tree up 3 weeks ago.
Don't worry about it... it's absolutely fine...
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So what, I'm supposed to chop down a tree and not only NOT get paid for it, but I have to pay someone else to do it.
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Umm...I had my tree up 3 weeks ago.Don't worry about it... it's absolutely fine...
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Umm...I had my tree up 3 weeks ago.Don't worry about it... it's absolutely fine...
Dreaming of a White Phosphorous Christmas, I see.
I see your "Baby It's Cold Outside" and raise you "Christmas Shoes."My current LEAST-favorite Christmas song?
"Mary Did You Know".
How stupid does a carol really need to be? It beats out "Little Drummer Boy" on the lyric idiocy meter.
YES. YES SHE KNEW. THE SODDING ANGEL TOLD HER. IT WAS CALLED THE ANNUNCIATION AND THERE ARE LITERALLY DOZENS OF LUMINOUS RENAISSANCE PAINTINGS DEVOTED TO THE SUBJECT. MARY KNEW. END OF DISCUSSION.
Now can we please get back to "Baby It's Cold Outside"?
some shoes.
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I absolutely refuse to acknowledge anything Christmas-related until December 1.
I refrain from throwing rocks at people who do between the day after Thanksgiving and December 1.
But the people who do such things before Thanksgiving?
Rocks are too good for 'em.
I got into an argument in the elevator with a coworker who insisted that the instant Halloween ends, Christmas stuff begins. Songs and all.
It doesn't help that November 1 our office puts up our tree and gets out all the Xmas decor for the lobby.
It drives me bananas.
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I like Thanksgiving admittedly because its the only holiday that in practice exists purely to celebrate food. And I like food. A lot. More than I probably should, really.
Huh, never heard that one before.
I imagine there'd be a riot here if you tried that.
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I like Thanksgiving because it's a much-needed short week when the kids have gone absolutely off-the-wall.
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So I'll admit we have far less family drama than most, but the whole idea of, "Invite everyone you know over for a giant get-together with plenty of good food and NO ELECTRONIC DISTRACTIONS" always appealed to me.
In our heyday my parents would host 23 people at 4 tables taking up 2 rooms of the house. We hung around, caught up with people we hadn't seen in ages, provided a refuge to those who had nowhere else to go, etc.
But the rules were very much like FaWtL: No politics, no sports, no television, and no family beefs. So it was an "arranged truce" where we just talked to people about things like, how they were, what they were doing these days, and getting to know them instead of their politics or biases.
And of course my family was very low-key, so even when politics came up the discussions weren't particularly passionate...
It's the only 4-day weekend we get without burning PTO.
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So I'll admit we have far less family drama than most, but the whole idea of, "Invite everyone you know over for a giant get-together with plenty of good food and NO ELECTRONIC DISTRACTIONS" always appealed to me.
In our heyday my parents would host 23 people at 4 tables taking up 2 rooms of the house. We hung around, caught up with people we hadn't seen in ages, provided a refuge to those who had nowhere else to go, etc.
But the rules were very much like FaWtL: No politics, no sports, no television, and no family beefs. So it was an "arranged truce" where we just talked to people about things like, how they were, what they were doing these days, and getting to know them instead of their politics or biases.
And of course my family was very low-key, so even when politics came up the discussions weren't particularly passionate...
why did you put a roach in the pudding?
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I have a three-year-old in my class who became a big sister the day before Thanksgiving.
Today at lunch, one of her classmates asked, "So how is your baby sister?"
She sighed and said, "Well, she's not dead yet."
I swear I'm not the father.
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The lie detector says that's a lie.
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I swear I'm not the father.
Vanykrye...
You ARE NOT the father!
I swear I'm not the father.
Vanykrye...
You ARE NOT the father!
WOOOOOO!!!!!!
So what do I win?
But seriously, it reminds me of exactly the kind of thing the Adult Kid would have said.
I walked right into that one. Well done.
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For two hours at the park this morning, my son called his friend Vincent "Venison" by mistake.
The best part is that Vincent is a vegetarian.
Awesome.
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Start seasoning him from now.
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For two hours at the park this morning, my son called his friend Vincent "Venison" by mistake.
The best part is that Vincent is a vegetarian.
A deer little chap, I'm sure.
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A deer little chap, I'm sure.For two hours at the park this morning, my son called his friend Vincent "Venison" by mistake.
The best part is that Vincent is a vegetarian.
It behooves me to Comet that Vincent's mom is quite fawn'd of him.
(A Blitzen of these puns would surely sleigh JMD031.)
Oh, those are so good.
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For two hours at the park this morning, my son called his friend Vincent "Venison" by mistake.
The best part is that Vincent is a vegetarian.
Is it possible your son had noticed that Venison was acting a bit... jerky?
Brava, madam. Brava.
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I keep misreading "LAPD" as "LARP" when I scroll through my news feed in the morning. The headline "LARP audit reveals dangers of high-tech policing" actually made sense. The first thought that went through my head was, "Hmm... must have been a Shadowrun game."
Is it possible your son had noticed that Venison was acting a bit... jerky?For two hours at the park this morning, my son called his friend Vincent "Venison" by mistake.
The best part is that Vincent is a vegetarian.
Possibly, but he's always game for a laugh, so maybe he didn't mind.
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I keep misreading "LAPD" as "LARP" when I scroll through my news feed in the morning. The headline "LARP audit reveals dangers of high-tech policing" actually made sense. The first thought that went through my head was, "Hmm... must have been a Shadowrun game."
Knight errant is no different from any other Corp, chummer.
An empty Altoids tin is just the right size to hold three Estes model rocket engines.
That is both random AND useful!
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Awkward: when your neighbor tells you her one-eyed cat is missing, and you respond with, "Aw, geez; well, I'll keep an eye out..."
fuuuuuuuhhhk.
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That's...really well done, LM. You managed to insert my size 14 in your mouth. *applauds*
In an absolutely and completely unrelated incident...*cough*...I might have just asked a guy with one arm if he "could give me a hand with something."
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I'm so sorry. So very sorry. But I'm still giggling about that.
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Did you see Impus Major's one on, "Why does REI have handicapped parking spaces?"
I was SO glad the windows were rolled up when he asked that one.
I had to Google REI before I got it. And yeah...LOL
I didn't know what REI was either. Turns out Illinois has 4 locations, but all of them are in suburban Chicago.
Did you see Impus Major's one on, "Why does REI have handicapped parking spaces?"
I was SO glad the windows were rolled up when he asked that one.
YO.....
Did you see Impus Major's one on, "Why does REI have handicapped parking spaces?"
I was SO glad the windows were rolled up when he asked that one.
You know, when I was in junior high, my best friend's dad was on the Ski Patrol at one of the ski resorts in the U.P... Powderhorn or Indianhead or Brule, can't remember which, because we skied all of them.
*HIS* best friend on the Ski Patrol was a one-legged medic. I didn't believe it until I actually saw them together. He skied better on one leg than most people do on two.
So... yeah.
I didn't know what REI was either. Turns out Illinois has 4 locations, but all of them are in suburban Chicago.
Did something happen to Erewhon? I thought that's where the trendy-outdoorsy Chicago urbanite went.
I didn't know what REI was either. Turns out Illinois has 4 locations, but all of them are in suburban Chicago.Did something happen to Erewhon? I thought that's where the trendy-outdoorsy Chicago urbanite went.
Only thing I'm finding for Erewhon is that it's the priciest grocery store in LA. And it's a novel.
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Awkward: when your neighbor tells you her one-eyed cat is missing, and you respond with, "Aw, geez; well, I'll keep an eye out..."
fuuuuuuuhhhk.
As the owner of a one-eyed cat, I assure you, this is completely appropriate. Expected even.
Sometimes, when the boy's whining (which is often), I look at him and say: "Dude. Get some perspective."
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That cat will kill you for such impertinence. Of course, it'll take a couple of tries because his depth perception is off.
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