Gallery of Regrettably Overpriced Items


Advice

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90,000gp for a Ring of Regeneration. It heals just one hit point per round, and allows you to regrow body parts that you never lose if you're playing by the Core rules. And prevents bleed damage, which is nice, but not worth the price.


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Wei Ji the Learner wrote:


Feather Tokens:

By the time folks can afford to have these expensive one-offs in their arsenal, their DCs and usage are somewhat limited, making them too expensive for the level they'd be handy at, but too worthless to just get as an emergency item. I have never seen ANY PC use this item.

Tree feather tokens are pretty much the ultimate anti swallow whole measure... and creative players can usually find something else to do with them.


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Tree feather tokens are amazing for sowing chaos.

Like when you activate it on the underside of a boat.

As to the original topic, I'm gonna throw in the Brilliant Energy enchant for tragically overpriced - I mean, it's very strong when actually serving its purpose, but between the drawbacks and the cost, I can't see a PC ever actually buying it.

Though if you have a "gain an enchant on the fly" class ability (such as the magus Ghost Blade arcana), then brilliant energy can be amazing.


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All siege-engines are garbage. A catapult does 6d6 and requires a crew of 4 to operate. ...for 21 damage. Know what else does 21 damage twice as fast? Two 1st-level monks flurrying with brass-knuckles. (That castle will be rubble in no time!)

And the ram, for 1000gp. (Apparently made of a tree trunk with one thousand coins nailed to it.)


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Wei Ji the Learner wrote:


[

Sustaining Spoon:

Sounds like a nifty bargain, only 5400 gp! Never. Go. Hungry. AGAIN!

...until one realizes that there are a lot of folks out there that have this as a orison/cantrip and could do it for *free* endlessly on a daily basis... Seen in loot piles, never with a PC

.

There's a cantrip or 0 level spell that gives you food?


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Matthew Downie wrote:
90,000gp for a Ring of Regeneration. It heals just one hit point per round, and allows you to regrow body parts that you never lose if you're playing by the Core rules. And prevents bleed damage, which is nice, but not worth the price.

Yep. Unless you are playing with a sadistic DM that uses crit or fumble rules where various limbs keep getting hack off.


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Pathfinder Starfinder Roleplaying Game Subscriber

Sorry, conflated Create Ale/Create Water (Ale is food, right?).


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pad300 wrote:
Wei Ji the Learner wrote:


Feather Tokens:

By the time folks can afford to have these expensive one-offs in their arsenal, their DCs and usage are somewhat limited, making them too expensive for the level they'd be handy at, but too worthless to just get as an emergency item. I have never seen ANY PC use this item.

Tree feather tokens are pretty much the ultimate anti swallow whole measure... and creative players can usually find something else to do with them.

Right now every character I play has at least one Feather Token tree. My philosophy is if you can't solvetemporarily negate a problem with an instant tree, you aren't trying hard enough. Its been useful, and 300gp is affordable.

Of course, I've only used this item a few times (excluding tree stride dungeon shenanigans) and I haven't seen anyone else bother with it.


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DrDeth wrote:
Yes, but the PRD is also official.

Officially not only useless but misleading a majority of the time too. One should NEVER use the PRD for anything really. It's as useful as your first edition ACG book...

DrDeth wrote:
There's a cantrip or 0 level spell that gives you food?

A 1st level spell and a cantrip.

#1 buy a pig skeleton off a butcher. [or 'find' your own]
#2 cast Restore Corpse: gain one rotten pig.
#3 cast Purify Food and Drink: Gain one fresh pig.
#4 everyone enjoys bacon and pork chops.
#5 cast Prestidigitation: Gain clean bones [optional, but I don't want a mess]
#6 toss bones in bag of holding for tomorrow.
#7 go to step #2 next day.

EDIT: replace pig for your favorite snack animal, but watch out for weight on some of the tastier ones. ;)


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Slim Jim wrote:

All siege-engines are garbage. A catapult does 6d6 and requires a crew of 4 to operate. ...for 21 damage. Know what else does 21 damage twice as fast? Two 1st-level monks flurrying with brass-knuckles. (That castle will be rubble in no time!)

And the ram, for 1000gp. (Apparently made of a tree trunk with one thousand coins nailed to it.)

You're forgetting stone has a hardness of 15 per inch, plus only picks and hammers are even able to damage stone. Castle walls are at least 5 feet thick. A monk isn't touching it. That even on max damage a siege engine will never get anywhere near enough damage to harm a wall without using bomb shot is its own problem though.


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Wei Ji the Learner wrote:


Sorry, conflated Create Ale/Create Water (Ale is food, right?).

I know a few people who would say yes...but no beer is not food


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Pathfinder Starfinder Roleplaying Game Subscriber
Jason Wedel wrote:
Wei Ji the Learner wrote:


Sorry, conflated Create Ale/Create Water (Ale is food, right?).
I know a few people who would say yes...but no beer is not food

Golarion.

Right.

RL tangent:
At least in the States, beer is considered a food and regulated by the Food and Drug Administration.


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deuxhero wrote:
Slim Jim wrote:
All siege-engines are garbage.
You're forgetting stone has a hardness of 15 per inch, plus only picks and hammers are even able to damage stone. Castle walls are at least 5 feet thick. A monk isn't touching it. That even on max damage a siege engine will never get anywhere near enough damage to harm a wall without using bomb shot is its own problem though.

The most flabbergasting line in the siege-engine section:

...the character closest to the front of the ram makes an attack roll against the AC of the construction, applying the –4 penalty for lack of proficiency. It’s not possible to be proficient with this device.

- What? Huh? It's a *ram*. You're attacking a stationary object the size of, well, a literal castle. It can't dodge. The ram is set up three feet away. You swing a log suspended on a frame. It'll hit the exact same spot every time (unless you move the ram). How can you fail to hit that spot?

<make a will save><make a will save><this can't be real...>

Sovereign Court RPG Superstar 2009 Top 32

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Zhangar wrote:
Though if you have a "gain an enchant on the fly" class ability (such as the magus Ghost Blade arcana), then brilliant energy can be amazing.

Of course, the fact that it's so situational makes the Ghost Blade arcana also regrettably overpriced :)

Feather Token Tree is amazing. The rest of them, well, not so much.

Brooch of Shielding is a legacy item, because Magic Missile used to be one of the best spells to disrupt concentration of an enemy spellcaster... back under Second Edition rules. The concentration rules got updated, the brooch did not. Hence it's pretty pointless now.

Grand Lodge

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Wei Ji the Learner wrote:

Well of Many Worlds:

Okay, this should really be either a cursed item or a GM plot device. 82,000 gp for a Portable Hole(20,000gp, for comparison numbers) that... opens a temporary gate to a random world, planet, or plane, and if it's moved, it's another random location. Added 'bonus'... it goes both ways... Never seen this one.

Only shows up in an AP as a plot device.

Spoiler:
In Council of Thieves, devils from the 4th (IIRC) layer of Hell use it as a portal to the 4th layer of Hell. The text states that it's the only viable destination for that particular portal.

So, yes, GM plot device. Easy way of justifying a minor invasion of evil outsiders.


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Kurald Galain wrote:

All right...

Nimble Shot bow. Sure, as a ranged character you need a way to deal with opportunity attacks, or possibly a backup melee weapon. It's not really a big deal to have such an option available at low level. But this bow enchantment counts as a plus four... that's way overpriced.

Smuggler's Collapsible Robe. What this lets you do is escape from combat... but only into the robe. Anything that's actually a threat to you is likely to either take the robe with them or destroy it, either of which puts you right back in the same predicament. It's not a bad ability per se but it really isn't great either (compared to e.g. a scroll of dimdoor), what's shocking about it is the price. How many smugglers do you think have 48000 gold just lying around for a haphazard pseudo-escape?

Deep Brown Sphere Ioun Stone. This uber powerful magical item, for the bargain price of ten thousand gold, lets you know how many feet you are below sea level. Impress your friends!

If this were a Harry Potter movie I could see this working well, but in an actual game this is not a good buy especially at that price.


Mangenorn wrote:
Wei Ji the Learner wrote:

Well of Many Worlds:

Okay, this should really be either a cursed item or a GM plot device. 82,000 gp for a Portable Hole(20,000gp, for comparison numbers) that... opens a temporary gate to a random world, planet, or plane, and if it's moved, it's another random location. Added 'bonus'... it goes both ways... Never seen this one.

Only shows up in an AP as a plot device.

** spoiler omitted **

So, yes, GM plot device. Easy way of justifying a minor invasion of evil outsiders.

3rd, but otherwise, yes, you are correct.

AP Spoiler!:
It was Erebus, the third layer of Hell - they were minions of Mammon.

:)


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DrDeth wrote:
avr wrote:

Most of the PRD is years out of date. Here's the current jingasa:

Ultimate Equipment Errata wrote:
This conical iron jingasa, or war hat, grants the wearer a +1 deflection bonus to AC. When struck by a critical hit or sneak attack, the wearer can spend an immediate action to negate the critical hit or sneak attack (similar to the fortification armor special ability, but without requiring a roll). The damage is instead rolled normally. This ability functions only once, though the jingasa continues to grant its deflection bonus even after the other ability is expended.
Yes, but the PRD is also official.

The latest update to the rules for that source is what Paizo will tell you is official. Paizo not having the time to update the PRD does not make the old version official rule.

You can use whatever you want in your home games, but for PFS, and if you ask any official Paizo staff they will tell you that the latest errata is the current version.


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Wei Ji the Learner wrote:


Feather Tokens:

By the time folks can afford to have these expensive one-offs in their arsenal, their DCs and usage are somewhat limited, making them too expensive for the level they'd be handy at, but too worthless to just get as an emergency item. I have never seen ANY PC use this item.

Restorative Ointment:

4000gp for something any decent healer should be able to do, or acts as a topical Cure Light Wounds... Never seen this in play, NPC or PC

Robe of Scintillating Colors:

27,000 gp to become a disco ball for ten rounds a day, doesn't reach maximum effectiveness (50% miss chance) until five rounds after activation. Never seen this one in use, either.

Scarab of Protection:

38,000 gp to protect against 12 energy drains(which destroys the item) and spell resistance 20. By the time most folks have the money to buy this, they can acquire better means that aren't expendable, plus takes the neck slot that is usually saved for something much more cost-effective. I've seen this in two loot piles, and it was quickly sold off to get much more reliable and longer-lasting items...

Sustaining Spoon:

Sounds like a nifty bargain, only 5400 gp! Never. Go. Hungry. AGAIN!

...until one realizes that there are a lot of folks out there that have this as a orison/cantrip and could do it for *free* endlessly on a daily basis... Seen in loot piles, never with a PC

Well of Many Worlds:

Okay, this should really be either a cursed item or a GM plot device. 82,000 gp for a Portable Hole(20,000gp, for comparison numbers) that... opens a temporary gate to a random world, planet, or plane, and if it's moved, it's another random location. Added 'bonus'... it goes both ways... Never seen this one.

Brooch of Shielding:

1500 gp for: Neck Protection from 101(?!) points of Magic Missile damage (only) before it melts and becomes useless. ...it's already kind of useless as it...

Most if not all of these are legacy items from earlier editions before people were likely (at least as far as I've heard) to be buying magic items as much as they apparently do these days. I know we were happy to find anything some days. :)


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Slim Jim wrote:

My halfling Oathbow paladin made good use out of an Efficient Quiver. An extra 54 pounds of crap, only restriction being shape? Sign me up. Everything I had was half-sized anyway. I can roll a change of clothes up into a cylinder. I can tape wands and scroll-tubes end-to-end, or just throw them in loose (no GM ever cared; as long as I wasn't trying to stuff the dog in there). And: more arrows in bunches in the big compartment.

I would think that a wand is similar enough to an arrow to be stored as one with no special arrangement.


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Wei Ji the Learner wrote:


Sounds like a nifty bargain, only 5400 gp! Never. Go. Hungry. AGAIN!

...until one realizes that there are a lot of folks out there that have this as a orison/cantrip and could do it for *free* endlessly on a daily basis... Seen in loot piles, never with a PC

It's a legacy item from when it wasn't a cantrip.


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knightnday wrote:
Most if not all of these are legacy items from earlier editions before people were likely (at least as far as I've heard) to be buying magic items as much as they apparently do these days. I know we were happy to find anything some days. :)

It should also be noted that many of these items were savagely beaten with the nerf bat and became of very limited value as a result. The AD&D version of the robe of scintillating colors for example, didn't have a rounds per day limitation...


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I have always felt that the well of many worlds should have been an artifact.

I actually like the brooch of shielding, the scarab of protection, and sustaining spoon. I also like the robe of scintillating colors but I agree it is overpriced.


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DrDeth wrote:
Wei Ji the Learner wrote:


[

Sustaining Spoon:

Sounds like a nifty bargain, only 5400 gp! Never. Go. Hungry. AGAIN!

...until one realizes that there are a lot of folks out there that have this as a orison/cantrip and could do it for *free* endlessly on a daily basis... Seen in loot piles, never with a PC

.

There's a cantrip or 0 level spell that gives you food?

Only if you're from Mars.


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graystone wrote:
DrDeth wrote:
Yes, but the PRD is also official.

Officially not only useless but misleading a majority of the time too. One should NEVER use the PRD for anything really. It's as useful as your first edition ACG book...

DrDeth wrote:
There's a cantrip or 0 level spell that gives you food?

A 1st level spell and a cantrip.

#1 buy a pig skeleton off a butcher. [or 'find' your own]
#2 cast Restore Corpse: gain one rotten pig.
#3 cast Purify Food and Drink: Gain one fresh pig.
#4 everyone enjoys bacon and pork chops.
#5 cast Prestidigitation: Gain clean bones [optional, but I don't want a mess]
#6 toss bones in bag of holding for tomorrow.
#7 go to step #2 next day.

EDIT: replace pig for your favorite snack animal, but watch out for weight on some of the tastier ones. ;)

Brontosaurus Burgers! Yabba dabba doo!


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Paradozen wrote:
pad300 wrote:
Wei Ji the Learner wrote:


Feather Tokens:

By the time folks can afford to have these expensive one-offs in their arsenal, their DCs and usage are somewhat limited, making them too expensive for the level they'd be handy at, but too worthless to just get as an emergency item. I have never seen ANY PC use this item.

Tree feather tokens are pretty much the ultimate anti swallow whole measure... and creative players can usually find something else to do with them.

Right now every character I play has at least one Feather Token tree. My philosophy is if you can't solvetemporarily negate a problem with an instant tree, you aren't trying hard enough. Its been useful, and 300gp is affordable.

Of course, I've only used this item a few times (excluding tree stride dungeon shenanigans) and I haven't seen anyone else bother with it.

IIrc, they used a Tree Token in an episode of Orville.


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graystone wrote:

A 1st level spell and a cantrip.

#1 buy a pig skeleton off a butcher. [or 'find' your own]
#2 cast Restore Corpse: gain one rotten pig.
#3 cast Purify Food and Drink: Gain one fresh pig.
#4 everyone enjoys bacon and pork chops.
#5 cast Prestidigitation: Gain clean bones [optional, but I don't want a mess]
#6 toss bones in bag of holding for tomorrow.
#7 go to step #2 next day.

EDIT: replace pig for your favorite snack animal, but watch out for weight on some of the tastier ones. ;)

You know, a group of druids could make a fortune using this combo to supply exotic meats to rich people without making a dent in the animals population.

Gain favour and monetary resources to run nature preserves without impacting endangered species population count. Sounds perfect.


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Pathfinder Starfinder Roleplaying Game Subscriber

Nobody tell Flutter, she'll recycle her pig-offerings!


Manswers. How long can you live on just beer...


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Not very long it seems.
Beer has a bunch of carbs, but is lacking in most other dietary requirements.


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BigNorseWolf wrote:
Manswers. How long can you live on just beer...

Just beer? A few weeks, mainly because the alcohol is a diuretic and you'd die of dehydration. If you drink extra water, months, until scurvy and/or protein deficiency set in.

Fun fact: There is a centuries-old tradition once practiced by the Paulaner monks of Munich, Germany that involves 'eating' only beer for lent [46 days].


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i would like to mention ring of regeneration another time its such a god awful item it needs to be mentioned more then once


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Almost all of the tech items from Technolgy guide are horribly overpriced for what they do. Worst is the Prismatic Lockcoder; for the measly sum of 200 000 you can reprogram any lock or access card, IF you can beat the DC60 Disable device check.


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Lady-J wrote:
i would like to mention ring of regeneration another time its such a god awful item it needs to be mentioned more then once

In that case, I should make a post about the Jingasa of the Fortunate Soldier every other post... :P


graystone wrote:
Lady-J wrote:
i would like to mention ring of regeneration another time its such a god awful item it needs to be mentioned more then once
In that case, I should make a post about the Jingasa of the Fortunate Soldier every other post... :P

well you can always use the pre nerfed version with gm permission but there is no, not crappy version of a ring of regeneration


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Personally, I think the Decoy Ring is one of the most cool and flavorful items I've seen. Become helpless or withdraw, create illusionary yous that retreat while you become invisible. It's great!

But 1, it takes up a ring slot. 2, it costs 12,000 gold. By the time you're willing to spend that much gold on a fun commodity like that, you're facing enemies that have True Seeing and the like.

With that said, unlike most of the items on this list, I think it's the sort of item that would make a GREAT item drop. "Hey, dudes, we found this weird magic ring that helps you escape when you need it!" "That sounds awesome, let's keep it and give it to the Rogue."


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Arguably, since the decoy ring makes you invisible but does not say 'as per the spell' or similar the rogue can use it more aggressively than you think. Losing invisibilty when you attack is part of the spell, not part of invisibility in general. It may actually be worth the cost.


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avr wrote:
Arguably, since the decoy ring makes you invisible but does not say 'as per the spell' or similar the rogue can use it more aggressively than you think. Losing invisibilty when you attack is part of the spell, not part of invisibility in general. It may actually be worth the cost.

I'd expect some serious table variation there. But if it's allowed to fly... heck yeah!


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It can be very great for a sniping rogue with the Fast Getaway talent.
Attack as a standard, deal sneak attack, withdraw to a different/safe location. Rinse, repeat.
Now you can only deal 1 attack a round this way, so it wont be dealing the most damage, but it is relietavely safe and grants you lots of invisibility.
You also dont HAVE to use the tactic every round, every fight.

The Exchange

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It might be cheating to use stuff from a companion book, since we all know those are full of garbage. But I've never seen a more worthless item than the Deep Brown Sphere Ioun Stone from the Dungeoneer's handbook.

For the low low price of 10,000 GP, you can have an Ioun Stone that tells you at all times exactly how many feet you are above or below sea level.

Is that ever a piece of information that's relevant? Or does this item exist solely to harass your GM by asking how many feet above sea level your character is every six minutes?

Silver Crusade

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Naseem Hamed wrote:

It might be cheating to use stuff from a companion book, since we all know those are full of garbage. But I've never seen a more worthless item than the Deep Brown Sphere Ioun Stone from the Dungeoneer's handbook.

For the low low price of 10,000 GP, you can have an Ioun Stone that tells you at all times exactly how many feet you are above or below sea level.

Is that ever a piece of information that's relevant? Or does this item exist solely to harass your GM by asking how many feet above sea level your character is every six minutes?

Its grossly, grossly overpriced but that information COULD be useful if you're in the underdark and are in a gradually descending/ascending tunnel.

In one campaign many, many years ago (hence, underdark :-)) we'd have VERY gladly given the inflation equivalent of 10,000 GP for it.

So, in almost 40 years of playing it would have been worth the cost once (well, for about 5 sessions IIRC) :-) :-)


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Lady-J wrote:
well you can always use the pre nerfed version with gm permission but there is no, not crappy version of a ring of regeneration

Isn't that the Boots of Earth...?


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pauljathome wrote:
Naseem Hamed wrote:

It might be cheating to use stuff from a companion book, since we all know those are full of garbage. But I've never seen a more worthless item than the Deep Brown Sphere Ioun Stone from the Dungeoneer's handbook.

For the low low price of 10,000 GP, you can have an Ioun Stone that tells you at all times exactly how many feet you are above or below sea level.

Is that ever a piece of information that's relevant? Or does this item exist solely to harass your GM by asking how many feet above sea level your character is every six minutes?

Its grossly, grossly overpriced but that information COULD be useful if you're in the underdark and are in a gradually descending/ascending tunnel.

In one campaign many, many years ago (hence, underdark :-)) we'd have VERY gladly given the inflation equivalent of 10,000 GP for it.

So, in almost 40 years of playing it would have been worth the cost once (well, for about 5 sessions IIRC) :-) :-)

How about the Vault Altimeter? 10gp and nonmagical, and "can be used to measure how deep you are beneath the surface."

graystone wrote:
Isn't that the Boots of Earth...?

Not in PFS. There they added a restriction of "can only be activated once per day," presumably to bring the power level down near the Ring of Regeneration.

Silver Crusade

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shaventalz wrote:
pauljathome wrote:
Naseem Hamed wrote:

It might be cheating to use stuff from a companion book, since we all know those are full of garbage. But I've never seen a more worthless item than the Deep Brown Sphere Ioun Stone from the Dungeoneer's handbook.

For the low low price of 10,000 GP, you can have an Ioun Stone that tells you at all times exactly how many feet you are above or below sea level.

Is that ever a piece of information that's relevant? Or does this item exist solely to harass your GM by asking how many feet above sea level your character is every six minutes?

Its grossly, grossly overpriced but that information COULD be useful if you're in the underdark and are in a gradually descending/ascending tunnel.

In one campaign many, many years ago (hence, underdark :-)) we'd have VERY gladly given the inflation equivalent of 10,000 GP for it.

So, in almost 40 years of playing it would have been worth the cost once (well, for about 5 sessions IIRC) :-) :-)

How about the Vault Altimeter? 10gp and nonmagical, and "can be used to measure how deep you are beneath the surface."

Never seen that one before :-).

Thats hilarious. 10 gp in one book for an item that is nearly as useful in one respect and more useful in another (+2 to survival) vs 10,000 gp in another book.

I guess the Ioun stone would allow somebody with overland flight to make really accurate maps :-).

I mean, authors defintely disagree from time to time. But THREE orders of magnitude difference. I think that might be a record.


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hey, the other 9,990 gp is for the altimeter.


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shaventalz wrote:


Not in PFS. There they added a restriction of "can only be activated once per day," presumably to bring the power level down near the Ring of Regeneration.

Well that just adds another reason not to play PFS...


graystone wrote:
Lady-J wrote:
well you can always use the pre nerfed version with gm permission but there is no, not crappy version of a ring of regeneration
Isn't that the Boots of Earth...?

nope cuz the boots aren't always active and when they are you cant move so even tho they are cheaper they are more crappy then the ring


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Lady-J wrote:
graystone wrote:
Lady-J wrote:
well you can always use the pre nerfed version with gm permission but there is no, not crappy version of a ring of regeneration
Isn't that the Boots of Earth...?
nope cuz the boots aren't always active and when they are you cant move so even tho they are cheaper they are more crappy then the ring

I can't find them on the srd. Anyone got a link?

I found Earth Root Boots


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Pathfinder Companion, Maps Subscriber; Pathfinder Roleplaying Game Superscriber; Starfinder Charter Superscriber

Archives of Nethys has them here.

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