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Tumor familiar + improved familiar air elemental = fart elemental familiar.
Guess which orafice it enters and exits from.
Edit: though you can only take improved familiar with DM permission.
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One of my friends has a 7th level Alchemist/3rd level Un-Rogue in PFS and he makes great use of his tumor familiar. It's a bat, which has some limited detection in darkness, and it has the protector archetype to keep him alive through situations that he has no business surviving.
I'm strongly considering making a melee brute Alchemist, but I'm still exploring my familiar options. It's a shame that you can't turn Boon familiars into tumors, though. That would open up a ton of interesting roleplay opportunities.
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Neal, I am one of those familiar naysayers, I just don't like them.
However, I do want to play an Aberrant Bloodrager (for the reach and general weirdness) and the Protector Tumor (seriously?) sounds like a good, filthy idea.
Good news it is only one feat. As I say, I don't care about them, so we'll never have to detach it. We'll always have Alertness on. The blob resembles the good old Greensting Scorpion for +4 Init. Protector archetype has a use if it shares the same square, that of Bodyguard to Aid Another for AC. Very nice. Shield Other and In Harm's Way still work when attached.
Five useful feats for the price of one seems a fair deal, and this require 0gp investment in the parasite.
Is this okay, or is there a better way?
Imbue Hex + Lifelink (Shamen Hex) on the Tumor, and Celestial Totem rage power for effective fast healing effective 5 + caster level.
Can be done with a scroll for like 1.2k or something and once in place it should never need to be re-appled as life link only terminates via action or via going out of range.
The Familiar also cannot die from the 5 damage / round as it has fast healing while attached, coupled with the shield other effect of protector and you're fairly unkillable.