'Embarrassing' Gaming Confessions


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That actually sounds cool.

I have always wanted to write some really good stories I have played in a serious way (not like the kind of stories I write on the messageboards) but I am actually not a very good writer and I am too much of a perfectionist too. So everytime I try to get at it I write one or two chapters before I get pissed off and drop everything.


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I'm still planning it out at the moment
Working out where it stats and where it ends and stuff
I'm also having a problem with my first idea for the first novel because I'm not sure if I should make book 1 and 2 into one book :/


depends on size of books 1 and 2 and how many pages you wanna put into volume 1... nowadays, LotR would be published as an hexalogy, not a trilogy.


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Making the mistake of naming my halfling ranger Teagal Baggins.

Minutes in the game I started getting called T-bag. And they soon forgot my original name...

When I received my wolf familiar I grudgingly named it Sugar..


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Praeceps wrote:

Making the mistake of naming my halfling ranger Teagal Baggins.

Minutes in the game I started getting called T-bag. And they soon forgot my original name...

When I received my wolf familiar I grudgingly named it Sugar..

I'm not gonna lie to you. You kind of deserved that one.


You cannot expect to give your character a funny name and people not to make fun of their name... even if they make fun for something completely different.

My confession: I am not able to avoid abbreviating my characters names. I choose a name that sounds awesome and I love it and in less than two sessions I am already abbreviating it. So other players start calling my character with the abbreviated name too. And a cool name becomes too often a three-two letter name.

Elisa Figuerola- Eli
Isabella «Inkskin» Locke- Isa
Kileanna- Ki (monks and ninjas must love her)
Velvet Larkin- V

There are a few characters that have avoided that destiny, but there are not too many.


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Vidmaster7 wrote:
Praeceps wrote:

Making the mistake of naming my halfling ranger Teagal Baggins.

Minutes in the game I started getting called T-bag. And they soon forgot my original name...

When I received my wolf familiar I grudgingly named it Sugar..

I'm not gonna lie to you. You kind of deserved that one.

Yeah I definitely walked into that. hehe

Scarab Sages

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Kileanna wrote:


I have always wanted to write some really good stories I have played in a serious way (not like the kind of stories I write on the messageboards) but I am actually not a very good writer and I am too much of a perfectionist too. So everytime I try to get at it I write one or two chapters before I get pissed off and drop everything.

Converting game sessions into fiction is HARD! I completely understand about getting frustrated.

I have a lot of friends who are published fiction writers. One thing I have learned from my author friends is that all writers are perfectionists. I've also learned that you have to just keep writing and STOP going back to re-read what you wrote before. Write the draft first, do the revisions when the draft is done. Otherwise you'll never finish. Also, don't give up, no matter how frustrated you get.


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Dire Elf wrote:
I have a lot of friends who are published fiction writers. One thing I have learned from my author friends is that all writers are perfectionists. I've also learned that you have to just keep writing and STOP going back to re-read what you wrote before. Write the draft first, do the revisions when the draft is done. Otherwise you'll never finish. Also, don't give up, no matter how frustrated you get.

We really need to lobby to get a button on these messageboards bigger than "favorite." :)


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I may have mentioned this before on the forums, or even this thread, so if I did please excuse the double post.

I wanted to be a writer since I was 13. I wrote superhero stories starring my classmates in junior high school. But I've not written anything since then. I've discovered that when I try to write my depression hits so hard and fast it makes me physically ill. My friends are always trying to get me to write, even if it's just a blog. But there's no way I can do it. It's just too hard on me.


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DungeonmasterCal wrote:

I may have mentioned this before on the forums, or even this thread, so if I did please excuse the double post.

I wanted to be a writer since I was 13. I wrote superhero stories starring my classmates in junior high school. But I've not written anything since then. I've discovered that when I try to write my depression hits so hard and fast it makes me physically ill. My friends are always trying to get me to write, even if it's just a blog. But there's no way I can do it. It's just too hard on me.

You have my utmost empathy. And my wish (for what it's worth) that someday, whatever needs to happen will happen so that you can find joy in creating instead of sickness.


Thanks. That means a great deal for me to hear. I hope the same thing happens, too.


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Well, being a GM is similar in many ways to being a writer, as you create a story too, even if it is a shared story.
You look like a great GM, so maybe this is your way of expressing your creativity and creating your stories.
It's maybe not the same but you are still creating stories that other people can enjoy and that's awesome.


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DungeonmasterCal wrote:

I may have mentioned this before on the forums, or even this thread, so if I did please excuse the double post.

I wanted to be a writer since I was 13. I wrote superhero stories starring my classmates in junior high school. But I've not written anything since then. I've discovered that when I try to write my depression hits so hard and fast it makes me physically ill. My friends are always trying to get me to write, even if it's just a blog. But there's no way I can do it. It's just too hard on me.

I'm utterly sorry for you, I'm in the opposite situation : depression has been hitting me much harder since a bad trauma made me stop keeping a diary, similarly, since I stopped keeping a dream diary (same story), I've stopped remembering my dreams. :( .


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Klorox wrote:
depends on size of books 1 and 2 and how many pages you wanna put into volume 1... nowadays, LotR would be published as an hexalogy, not a trilogy.

Yeah I know :/ I think I might give it the Wuthering Heights treatment, where it has an internal part 2.


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Kileanna wrote:

Well, being a GM is similar in many ways to being a writer, as you create a story too, even if it is a shared story.

You look like a great GM, so maybe this is your way of expressing your creativity and creating your stories.
It's maybe not the same but you are still creating stories that other people can enjoy and that's awesome.

Thanks, Kileanna. They are quite similar and it's true that it is a shared experience. When I write my adventures it's usually a page, sometimes three, of notes. Then I print off the monsters I want to use, create a pile of loot, and then react to what the players do in game, making sure to herd them along the route I want them to take without them realizing it.

But to sit down and try to write an actual story or blog, well, that's something else entirely for me. The last time I tried to write something was 5 years ago and I made it to about 12 pages before it became too much to bear, so I've not touched it since. I have a couple of friends who are authors and they really liked it and encouraged me to continue, but I just couldn't. Even thinking about it sometimes gives me panic attacks. So I guess the "Greatest Fantasy Novel Ever Written" will stay locked up in my head.. lol


Klorox wrote:
DungeonmasterCal wrote:

I may have mentioned this before on the forums, or even this thread, so if I did please excuse the double post.

I wanted to be a writer since I was 13. I wrote superhero stories starring my classmates in junior high school. But I've not written anything since then. I've discovered that when I try to write my depression hits so hard and fast it makes me physically ill. My friends are always trying to get me to write, even if it's just a blog. But there's no way I can do it. It's just too hard on me.

I'm utterly sorry for you, I'm in the opposite situation : depression has been hitting me much harder since a bad trauma made me stop keeping a diary, similarly, since I stopped keeping a dream diary (same story), I've stopped remembering my dreams. :( .

I hope you can work past the trauma you've been going through. If it's not too painful maybe you can journal about that; sometimes people find that therapeutic. But it can also keep such an event alive in your thoughts and cause a person to take longer to come to terms with it. I truly hope that you can work through it somehow, and for what it's worth, I'm only a private message away if you ever want to talk about it. I've been through a trauma of my own (it may not be as bad for some folks, but it really messed me up for a long time) so I know it does sometimes help to get things off your chest.


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Pathfinder Adventure Path, Lost Omens Subscriber

Not sure if this is embarrassing or a humblebrag...

My first real PFS game ever will be this year's PFS Special at Paizocon.


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DungeonmasterCal wrote:

I may have mentioned this before on the forums, or even this thread, so if I did please excuse the double post.

I wanted to be a writer since I was 13. I wrote superhero stories starring my classmates in junior high school. But I've not written anything since then. I've discovered that when I try to write my depression hits so hard and fast it makes me physically ill. My friends are always trying to get me to write, even if it's just a blog. But there's no way I can do it. It's just too hard on me.

I did much the same in elementary school. I made up entire story arcs where we solved mysteries for English vocabulary class. I wanted friends so badly, but I didn't have any. I got laughed at when kids in class discoveed their names in my work.


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That's very sad, Freehold. I'm sorry you had to deal with that. I was always pretty popular in school, despite being a nerd. I could fit into most niches but preferred the company of my fellow geeks. The biggest drawback to that was the girls all just wanted to be friends rather than date. That kinda sucked.


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DungeonmasterCal wrote:
That's very sad, Freehold. I'm sorry you had to deal with that. I was always pretty popular in school, despite being a nerd. I could fit into most niches but preferred the company of my fellow geeks. The biggest drawback to that was the girls all just wanted to be friends rather than date. That kinda sucked.

Freehold DM, I have to apologize to you. You said something very personal and possibly traumatic to you as a kid and I turned it into something about myself. That was selfish and thoughtless of me to do that, and I'm very sorry.


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Oh no, I didn't take offense to this at all! It's okay man, this is a forum, you talk and we listen.


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I don't think there is anything wrong in sharing your own experiences. What you said, Freehold, made me remember my own experiences. I was pretty unpopular at school and I closed into myself and spent the time drawing. They laughed at me for it, but then they asked me to draw something for them and I wanted so bad to be liked that I'd aggree. Then I usually heard them laughing at the drawings I did for them because they had some flaws. I blamed myself for not being good enough at it.

Fortunately everything got better at high school when I met different people.

About writing, I try every kind of expression I can think of even if I am not good at it. Even cooking is to me a way of expressing creativity. But I've found that I like doing all these things as a hobby. I love doing them to relax, and a job is not relaxing. I don't think I'd make a good professional writer, or artist, and I definitely didn't make a good cook. Too much stress for me.


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Which s!!~ty ass schools are people going to where creativity is scorned?

Jesus .-. in my school people got super jealous of people who could draw (me included) and bugged the fug out of them xD and I'm pretty sure I'd just beg people to include me in their little mystery short stories xD sounds like fun.

my school wasn't perfect or anything but people didn't prefer the world in Grey O.o.

People asking for art to then laugh at it makes my blood boil.

I think being a manipulative savage little s+&~ made highschool easier on me xD

I find liberal applications of red wine (to me and the food) improved my cooking, hope that helps @Kileanna


Being a Spaniard I cannot say no to using wine for cooking, you know ;-D

I don't think people in my school rejected creativity. I just was the kind of girl kids tend to be mean to. I was some sort of shy know it all who didn't know when to keep her mouth shut. Fortunately I changed. I am no longer shy.


I think its how you talk about being desperate for people to like you, makes my heart ache.


I've got over it with the years but I've always been kinda insecure.


*Hugs Kileanna*


Dalindra wrote:
*Hugs Kileanna*

*Hugs back*


*watches hugging*

Well this is awkward


Hey, hey, right now we are just hugging.
It could be worse.


Here now! What's all this then? Move it along!


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*Hugs the Fun Constable*


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*sputters in comical fashion*


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Writing doesn't come naturally to me, heck most things doesn't.
My brain functions in a way, that makes writing more then 20-30min at a time, incredibly hard.
Oh I can talk for hours, no problem there, staying obsessively on subject on topic as if my life depended on it. But, as soon as I have to write, I become a malfunctioning wireless connection. Constantly losing focus, words, and my thought stream.
Luckily I have found other outlets, though to this day, I wish I had cultivated other creative arts, at an younger age, more vigorously so that I could express myself through drawing, painting or the like.


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Hugs for all!

So I'm reading the new Qadira book and it mentions dire corbies several times. I keep misreading it as "dire corgis". Their yapping will haunt my nightmares...


Huge dire dogs with dire pointy ears and tiny legs!

Do you draw, Kjeldorn? Now I am curious about it, I'd really love to see something you have done.


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Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber
Escallorak wrote:

Hugs for all!

So I'm reading the new Qadira book and it mentions dire corbies several times. I keep misreading it as "dire corgis". Their yapping will haunt my nightmares...

Oops, dropped this. ;)


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Another, more likely take.


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Trigger Loaded wrote:
Another, more likely take.

Was expecting to see DR 1/Cold Iron not stopping them from being low on the food chain.


Kileanna wrote:

Huge dire dogs with dire pointy ears and tiny legs!

Do you draw, Kjeldorn? Now I am curious about it, I'd really love to see something you have done.

I haven't put pencil to paper in almost 15 years now, so I haven't the faintest idea, of where my drawing supplies would be, But I keep my eyes out.

As for older works, I'll have to see if any of the stuff, I gifted still is around.


I stopped drawing for... too many years. If you look at my DA gallery you can see there is a gap between my most recent ones (2017) and the previous ones (2008). That's almost 10 years!
When I got back to it I feared I wouldn't be able to do it and somehow, I found out that I was still able to do it and somehow I had even improved some things.
So don't fear getting back to it if you feel like doing it!


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When I was a kid, I wanted to be a cowboy artist. To clarify, not an artist that focused on western themes, but a cowboy and an artist.

Embarrassing confession: My younger brother and I are playing a game where our characters are adopted brothers. The weird thing is our roles have reversed and now he's the one keeping me in task and in the one running after everything shiny.


I'm what I would call a hot'n'cold DM. On one hand, I love showering my PCs with shinies like my first name was Monty and love rooting for them when they demolish my encounters.

On the other hand, I really, REALLY love creating the most blantantly munchkined, "technically legal", sadistic, and just plain brutally unfair encounters. If it is not at least APL+2, it ain't an encounter, it's a speed bumb. My boss monsters regularly hit APL+4 or worse...

I have also have terrible addiction to templates and will stack them until it gets scarily close to silly. Does not help with my uber boss monster problem, let me tell ya. For example, Human Apostle Kyton Graveknight Psychic 16/Antipaladin 2 in artifact plate would probably be the end boss of lvl 15 campaign for me. Like, I start statting out the BBEG and it just starts snowballing: "Just... One more level to round out the stats.. Eh, another one to get those nice 8 level spells to make it more epic. Another template to get those juicy +6 stat boosts. Maybe a few stat boosting iteDEAR NUFFLE WHAT HAVE I DONE".

Then I feel bad when my players try and fail to hurt the invincible Munchkin God Monster and extra bad when a player dies. Fortunately, my players are a highly resourceful bunch that have the uncanny knack to home in on that single solitary weak spot in Nuffle's Great Technically Legal One.

For example, a fight between maybe 11-12 level PC team of a Mentalist and a Witch and scry'n'frying level 14 Devilbound Occultist Arcanist. The Arcanist teleports in, casts Emergency Force Sphere and prepares to spam Lightning Elementals until the group is dead. So, Wall of Force effect on all sides, and the BBEG is holding something that makes him immune to all mind-affecting effects (Either an Ioun Stone or just plain Protection from Evil, can't remember). The Witch player ends the fight with Frost Tomb hex in the first round, because the BBEG was not packing Freedom of Movement and had sucky Fort save. That made me feel the weirdest combination of relief, anger, sadness and happiness.... But mostly relief and happiness :)

I blame this deviant mind-set on the first Pathfinder Module I ran when I was an impressionable wee little DM, just starting the first year of my RP career. It was Carrion Hill. Richard Pett module. Yes, that means the single greatest inspiration for my style of pay was Richard "Imma gonna make technically CR 20 boss that is tougher than CR 27 Demon Lord" Pett. Which ain't an excuse but maybe sheds some light into how my Monty Haul inclined brain got its Killer DM shoulder devil.

Phew, that was a rant and a half, but it feels nice to get that off my chest. Any other reluctant Killer DM's here?


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Pathfinder Adventure Path, Lost Omens Subscriber

I'm the opposite of a killer GM.

I want my PCs to win.

As a GM, I regularly fudge rolls... but exclusively in the PCs' favor.

Unless the player does something actively stupid, or a PC death would be dramatically perfect in the narrative, I am extremnely reluctant to kill a PC... and pretty much don't.


Haladir wrote:

I'm the opposite of a killer GM.

I want my PCs to win.

As a GM, I regularly fudge rolls... but exclusively in the PCs' favor.

Unless the player does something actively stupid, or a PC death would be dramatically perfect in the narrative, I am extremnely reluctant to kill a PC... and pretty much don't.

I seldom fudge rolls, but I'll adjust a creature's stats or neglect to use an ability to help my PCs out. They said when we started this campaign that they really wanted to make it to 20th level, so I'm doing what I can to help them. Even if one dies, they have a connection with the temple of the deity the favor who helps them with

Raise Dead spells.


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When I write my own campaign material, my villains are serial monologuers and it frequently leads to their downfall.


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Pathfinder Starfinder Roleplaying Game Subscriber

Few things are as embarrassing as sitting down and being halfway through a scenario and realizing that you're using an older version of the character.


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Goddity wrote:
When I write my own campaign material, my villains are serial monologuers and it frequently leads to their downfall.

This is perfect for a certain style of game. :D


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I never make my BBEGsplayers give monologues, my players will never let them speak a single word. When they do, they are interrupted after a few syllables. It's frustrating.

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