Help me Build my own BadPiper?


So, in a less than serious game I might be playing in, I was thinking of playing a bard. This led me to thinking...what if I created a character loosely based on the BadPiper? Don't know who that is? Then behold his glory and know fear.

There are two main things I can't work out - how to do some kind of damage with both hands occupied by a set of flame-throwing Bag Pipes, and how to create a set of flame-throwing Bag Pipes. Skald would obviously make a lot of sense - if ever someone was going to magically enrage people to acts of violence, it's that guy - but Bard also offers some useful options and archetypes, so I've not counted it out yet.

Fire music feat allows you to make all bard damage spells fire, so that could help with the pipes.

Oooh, burny. Would mean a quick dip into another spellcasting class, if I'm reading prerequisites right...but that's fine.

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