1001 Inconsequential Flora & Fauna


Homebrew and House Rules

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285. Cmdnur- The flowering bushes grow all over the countryside, and are known for their enormous, fuzzy seedpods, which are roughly the size of a large man's head. Once the seed pods are harvested and the seeds themselves removed, the remaining skin can be specially dried and alchemically treated to be turned into a rakish or foppish hat, depending on the season and location of the bearer. Some apprentice smiths early on discovered the fire resistant(although not fireproof) aspects of the hats, and often wear them in an attempt to bring a bit of style into a trade known for its rough edges, but journeyman smiths are aware of the hat's fuzziness can occasionally block sound, and some unfortunate folks rushing to get the hats before they sell out occasionally buy one that's too large for them and also blocks their sight to an extent, resulting in said smiths bossing around their juniors, telling them where to walk while in the shop and often telling them how to talk as well.

Dark Archive

Freehold DM wrote:
Why is the honey inedible again? Is it like eating candle wax or... well, blood jelly or something? Can the honey be used for something else?

Mainly 'cause I just like the idea of the wasp's honey being more or less useless (to people, it serves them just fine), and that the elves cultivate them for mostly religious / traditional reasons, and not because they are particularly useful.

I wanted to avoid them being 'too useful' (they make honey! And paper! And they make great familiars!), but veered even farther and made them more or less mooches of no real value.

Like cats. :)


It's also realistic, since most "honey"-making insects, including those bees who literally make "blood honey", don't produce edible products. I do like the idea of the forlorn honey being used as a sort of exotic seasoning, though.


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286. Hissing Dogs
These small ash-gray canines have sharp, syringe-like teeth, bright olive-green eyes, and tufted ears like those of a bobcat. They are adept climbers, with nimble claws almost reminiscent of a child's hands, and usually keep to the deeper and darker forests. Hissing dogs are suspected to have been an early attempt at magical domestication, or perhaps even of fusion, similar to the owlbear but with a social purpose. Perhaps they were raccoon-dog hybrids, meant to serve as the perfect hunting animals. All that is certain is that they are thankfully rare. While harmless to humanoids, hissing dogs are a true menace to farmers and all those who keep small animals as pets or livestock.

Not unlike owlbears, hissing dogs have no sense of killing only to feed. They will carry out their brutal instincts without any rational limitations. A single hissing dog will creep into a hen house, methodically wring every chicken's neck, and then make its escape with only the last hen gripped between its jaws. Worse, hissing dogs are cleverer than raccoons, and learn quickly how to undo latches or avoid patrolling humans. Because hissing dogs' hunting territory ranges across multiple miles every night, it's not always practical for a farmer to actively hunt the hissing dog down herself. The only really feasible solution is to hire a few local adventurers to track the hissing dog back to its lair, often itself an arduous journey. Luckily, local adventurers work for cheap. Unluckily, the stealthy hissing dogs tend to make their dens close to other, more dangerous creatures.

A hissing dog has the statistics of a common dog, but with a +4 racial bonus to Stealth and Climb. Instead of Skill Focus (Perception), hissing dogs take Deft Hands, placing 1 rank in Disable Device instead of Perception.


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Crops, Herbs, and Gardens

287. Toassaar pronounced Toh-ah-SAAR

This strange, omnivorous plant has a 2-3ft wide toothy maw at its center and it has primary roots that "dig and spread the earth" to create a 6ft pit underneath it, and then secondary roots attempt to "fan out" as they grow throughout the nearby soil (typically out to 20-30ft). They are known as the "garbage can" of plants, because it naturally composts everything from bones, to kitchen scraps, to dead plants and animals. Toassaars are a gardener's delight, because the secondary roots that fan out underneath the ground help fertilize the nearby soil within 30ft and infuse it with the nutrients from its composting process. It is quite common for gardeners to spend a year dumping their weeds, dead vermin and pests, animal bones, kitchen scraps, and other refuse into a Toassaar to let it digest and infuse a section of their garden with a vast array of nutrients, and then carefully transplant that Toassaar to another section of their garden for the following year, and then transplant it again the following year. This process of transplanting is quite arduous and must be done carefully, and there are some who take the concept of "Toa-composting" to another level by attending Flora-Composting Seminars and Gardening Competitions.

Despite the ominous toothy maw, Toassaars do not bite-- nor do they ever close their maws-- and in fact they are not a danger to anyone or anything. While these plants are most commonly found in gardens, they survive in the wild by catching falling acorns and leaves, bird droppings, and anything that happens to fall inside and for whatever reason cannot climb out.

288. Toaxooxi pronounced Toh-ah-ZOOK-zee

This cousin of the Toassaar can actually uproot itself and crawl on the ground (movement speed 2.5ft/rnd) and attempts to find dead animals, animal droppings, leaves, and any decaying matter. Toaxooxi make excellent "garden guardians" because they frighten varmints and vermin that would attempt to scavenge thriving gardens. Like Toassaars, Toaxooxi are omnivorous and can compost almost any type of matter, except they "spread" their composted material wherever they crawl. However, they don't provide a concentrated infusion of nutrients to a specific area like a Toassaar provides.

289. Purifying Fennel

This flowering fennel plant produces seeds that can be boiled to produce an effect similar to a Purify Food and Drink spell, and then added to any dish as a garnish. Not only do they purify all the food on the plate, but they are highly nutritious. However, when boiled and prepared in this way, they have the same consistency and taste as an old leather boot. Furthermore, the carrot-like white bulb that is its root can be diced and stewed, or pan-fried or boiled and eaten as a side dish.

290. Dhilpaam

This herb is a staple in the gardens of those who like to cook pork and fish. In the wild, it typically grows in lakes and slow-moving rivers, and its roots must be completely submerged in water, so gardeners will typically keep this plant in a hydroponic-suspension apparatus with its roots submerged in containers of nutrient dense water and compost juice.

291. Cloneleek

The Cloneleek is a cousin species of onions, garlic, and shallots, and has an asexual method of reproduction where seeding does not occur, but rather through the extraordinary process of Binary Fission, or "Budding in Hydra". The Parent Hydra develops a bud off the side of its stem over a period of 4 weeks and then detaches, and this "daughter hydra" will root itself within 1 day. Cloneleeks have a mild onion taste and are typically used in stews, soups, and for flavoring steaks while cooking.

292. Eriograss

Eriograss is an extremely rare and expensive grass, and can usually only be found in the gardens of wealthy gardeners and marriage therapists. It produces a strong aphrodisiac scent that is like a mix of lavender, vanilla, peppermint, and freshly-cut grass. It is used as a base for love potions, such as Philter of Love, and by hopeless romantics to "set the mood". One need not drink this potion for it to have effect; you only need to grab a handful of this grass and shred it, and then for the next hour, anyone within 15ft who smells this falls in love (or platonic adoration, Will DC: 13 negates) with the first person they see as if they had drank a Philter of Love potion, except the effects only last while they are within 15ft and for an additional 1d4 hours after they have left the area.

293. Eboncane

Eboncane is a 5-6ft tall perennial grass-like crop that has jointed, fibrous stalks that are densely rich with a black-colored sucrose. It has a similar taste to black licorice, and can be used as a substitute to any dish, dessert, or pastry that requires sugar.

294. Needle Maize

This maize-like crop grows approximately 7-10ft tall and produces ear stalks that are protected by hundreds of 3 to 5 inch needle-like thorns. While this defense mechanism makes it nearly impossible to be eaten by most animals, it is barely even a hindrance for a humanoid if they handle and shuck the crop with leather gloves.

295. Dire Needle Maize

The Dire Needle Maize is similar to their smaller Needle Maize cousins, except this species can grow up to 35-50ft tall. Harvesting Dire Needle Maize is considered a dangerous profession because the needles are sharp enough to penetrate leather. Furthermore, since the needles are roughly 2 to 3 feet long, they are long enough to penetrate a persons vital organs in the event of an accident. Ostensibly, this crop must be harvested carefully, and one must wear special "ladder-safe" lightweight plate armor during the picking, handling, and shucking process to prevent these injuries. The trouble is worth it though, because a single ear of this maize weighs roughly 18-25lbs and can feed a small village.

296. Planar Lily

This white and pink-leafed lily seemingly floats through the air in the Material Plane, except its roots are in the Plane of Air. Most flowers absorb carbon dioxide and light for photosynthesis and then produce oxygen, except the Planar Lily does the exact opposite. It absorbs the purest oxygen from the Plane of Air through its roots, which produces the purest carbon dioxide for other nearby plants in the Material Plane to then absorb. Gardeners will typically try to encapsulate this "floating lily" in greenhouses or similar enclosures for maximum effect.

297. Smoking Angelica

This species of angelica is roughly 12-16 inches tall and it seems as if this herb is constantly on fire, because it continually creates small puffs of light white smoke from its umbrella-shaped flowers. Strangely, it is not warm or hot to touch. Great Thinkers and Researchers have concluded this phenomenon occurs because Smoking Angelicas absorb carbon dioxide and then produce carbon monoxide, various aldehydes, sulfur dioxide, and nitrogen oxides as products of its photosynthesis process, which in turn creates this smoke. While the earthy-musky smell of Smoking Angelica can be quite off-putting to most, the root, leaves, and seeds can all be used in a variety of ways once they've been dried and cleaned: its leaves can be used as a smoky-flavored parsley that is ideal for flavoring various meats, as well as used in curiously-comforting and soothing earthly-aromatic teas; the root and seeds can be used in making a small handful of herbal medicines as well, ranging from liver detoxification, to digestive aids, to enhancing blood circulation; the root can also be distilled for making various alcoholic spirits that are especially popular with dwarves, orcs, and humans. Zumhug's Smoking Temper and Granitemantle Gin are particularly popular brands of high-proof spirits.


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Crops, Herbs, and Gardens cont'd

298. Rubicund Rye

Also known as "Red Rye" or "Ruby Rye", this brightly-glowing ruby-colored rye is a nutritious wheatgrass that is grown by farmers as a grain that is used to make flour and bread, as well as crisps and crackers, and especially used in animal meal mixes. It is also used in a variety of whiskeys and ales. Consuming products made with Rubicund Rye invariably turns your poop glowing red.

299. Behemoth Barkweed

This colossal-sized grass can be grown and harvested in climates that have year-round freezing temperatures as a robust building material that is harder than wood, and each blade of this grass can grow in excess of 50ft tall. Although it can grow in any climate, it will not retain its harder-than-wood rigidity if grown in a climate that has higher than freezing temperatures. When grown in climes with temperatures that are above freezing, the grass becomes droopy and flimsy, but can be consumed by a variety of herbivorous grazing animals (especially Dire Tuskiloxodons), but is not fit for humanoid consumption. When it is droopy and flimsy it's usually only 25-30ft "tall" at the apex of the bend, but still ~50ft long.

300. King's Karrough Root

The Karrough Root plant is a species of beetroot and is considered one of the most nutritious vegetables known to humanoid-kind. Roughly 130 years ago, it was renamed as King's Karrough Root due to being popularized as a "superfood" of sorts because it was regularly consumed by royalty and the wealthy during that era for the abundance of its beneficial health properties. Today, it is no longer the "vegetable of royalty" because it can be found in gardens in almost every kingdom.

301. Infernal Chicory

This celery-like species of chicory is rumored (and rightly so) to have been originally created with devil's blood, and gives its imbiber fast healing 1 for 1 minute as per the spell Infernal Healing, as well as acting like a Suggestion spell specifically to perform evil acts (this Suggestion effect has no affect on good or neutral act suggestions). Handling or consuming this chicory is considered highly evil, and is oftentimes blended into a juice and consumed while performing evil ritualistic magics. While any good- or neutrally- aligned people wouldn't be caught dead with this in their gardens, it can be regularly found in the gardens of those who make evil pacts and practice nefarious magic.

302. Firecress

This orange- and red- colored herb is used in making extremely spicy sauces and mustards. The spicy scent of this plant can be smelled from almost 15 feet away, and it is common to place Firecress on the outside of one's garden to deter varmints, vermin, and rodents from coming near.

303. Dreamgrove

This monocotyledon flowering grass-like plant continuously releases a soft-yellow-glowing pollen that has the extraordinary ability to produce an effect similar to the Hallucinatory Terrain spell when inhaled, except it only produces the illusion that one is walking through an immense grove that would make any Druid proud (it cannot produce any other illusions, Will DC 14 negates, harmless).

304. Whistling Adansonia

This hollow, hexcomb-cored, 30-40ft tall tree has an oval-shaped fruit that is encased in an indehiscent shell that does not break open easily, but naturally cracks open once the fibrous, mango-like fruit has ripened. Iconically, when a light breeze hits the base of this tree just right, the air moves up through the hollow core of this tree similar to a pipe organ found in any common church, and provides a mellifluous whistling melody. Although, it is quite rare to find one of these trees in a garden or orchard because they exclusively reside in savannas and similarly warm climates due to their strict temperature needs. If one sits and meditates near this tree and listens to the melodic whistling for 1 hour, then they gain a +1 Morale bonus to have a nice day.


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305:Weeping Willow
It makes a weeping sound as a supernatural ability. Goths, shadow mages, and vampires love this tree. It's otherwise like other willows. Spiritualists can make their wands from shed branches.


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306. Necrosquitoes, or "death suckers", are flying insects of inconsequential size... their bodies maybe a centimeter in length. Female necrosquitoes feed on the negative energy that fuels the Undead before laying their eggs. These pests completely avoid the living, as blood has no value to this species of parasite.

307. Bone Lice are microscopic centipedes that devour calcium-rich bone material. Their carapace/exoskeleton is made of condensed calcium, which makes bone lice extremely resilient. They have no natural predators and will grow as long as they have food... they will grow to such lengths that they fill the tunnel they have left behind them all the way back to where it begins. Their ability to seal their own tunnels with their own bodies actually ends up reinforcing the bone inwhich they have borrowed... since their bodies are made up of even denser calcium.


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308. Gypsum Nightshade
This rare "variety" of gypsum flower was introduced into the world a long, long time ago by unknown druids. Like gypsum flowers, it is not a plant, but a crystalline formation. It is so named for the peculiar white "fruits" that form beneath the clusters, almost akin to tubers.

While not inherently magical, gypsum nightshade seems to be very sensitive to ambient magical activity, and is known to act as an "emotion sink". Major magical events occurring near the "plant" often cause the tubers to take on a sickly yellow glow, shedding dim illumination like candles. Some have suggested that these magical events actually create gypsum nightshade. When the magical event is keyed to strong emotions in the caster - particularly magic that weakens the barriers between the Material Plane and the Ethereal Plane, where dreams become wispy reality - the effects can be far more dramatic, and the "fruits" can become dangerous batteries. In this event, the fruits seem to create little demiplanes within them, forming over a timespan ranging from weeks to millennia tiny worlds of whatever emotions the caster failed to control in themselves.

The longer the timespan, it is said, the more complex and tortured the dreamscape. If the caster was grieving the loss of a loved one, touching a very developed fruit might transport someone into a hallucinatory dream world where they must experience their own loved one's death, or bear witness to the caster's own tragedy. If the caster was filled with rage, touching a younger fruit might simply imbue the bearer with anger they can't explain or control. If there are many plants, or many fruits, many different warring emotions might be captured.

Though rare, gypsum nightshade fruits make useful foci for spells involving the Ethereal Plane or the Plane of Dreams, and can be used to supplement more expensive components or enhance the spells in question. Possessing an intact glowing crystal tuber, either not imbued with emotion or whose emotions the bearer has successfully "processed", allows the bearer to plane shift onto the Ethereal Plane or Dreamlands with perfect spatial accuracy. The gypsum fruit is destroyed if and when they return to the Material Plane. Additionally, any gypsum fruit may be used as a focus for calm emotions or dispel magic to permanently remove a single kind of emotional effect from a target, such as removing a confusion effect from a mob. Using the fruit in this way gives the caster a +4 bonus on CL checks, and increases the save DC by +2. Finally, a gypsum fruit can be used to grant a +2 bonus on Concentration checks to continue casting when injured, taking continuous damage, or affected by a non-damaging spell. There may be other uses to the fruit not yet explored.

Using a gypsum fruit to manage emotions can have consequences on the gypsum fruit over time. It doesn't erase the emotions. It just stores them, bottles them up. There are stories of casters who used the fruits to store all their unwanted emotions, only to be caught and trapped in the dreamscapes they themselves had created. There, they were forced to relive their most intense and unbearable emotional moments over and over, until they'd either successfully processed it all or, more often, starved to death.

A single gypsum fruit can be sold for, at market price, 250 gp, or 500 gp if it's glowing. They're difficult to sell, though. Emotionally-infused gypsum fruit tend to be especially hard to pawn off on any jeweler who knows what they're doing. Likewise, gypsum fruit are not generally sold to casual buyers. They're almost like cursed items.


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309. Cloudweaver Bees

Cloudweaver Bee larvae cannot eat honey in its raw viscous form because their mouths are too small, so the workers have a process to turn this honey into fine strands of honey that resembles cotton candy. These honeybees create two hives, the first hive is for the queen and the larvae, and the second hive is built for the honeycombs with mud and clay like an oven but in the shape of a child's spinning top toy, and they typically hang this second hive from branches that have suitable clearance underneath. The workers then stack on top of each other and vibrate their bodies intensely while on top of the honeycombs, while other workers remain outside to simultaneously spin the hive. Astoundingly, the temperature inside the honeycomb reaches 300 degreesF 150 degreesC while the hive spins in excess of 3,300 revolutions per minute, and once the RPM's and temperature have reached these ideal conditions, the workers transform a portion of their honey into "clouds" of fine strands of honey that the larvae can then engorge themselves with.

Cloudweaver Bees are stingless bees, and are a common favorite amongst apiarists due to having a ready supply of honey and cloudweave candy. Cloudweaver Queens can lay between 1,000 and 3,000 eggs per day, so Cloudweaver workers will typically perform this process 2-3 times per day in order to provide enough food for the growing larvae.


This would be a great article - 100 different species of magical bees.


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I would do magical/supernatural insects, so then you could include bees, ants, flies, grasshoppers, beetles, butterflies, mosquitoes, fleas, etc.

Dark Archive

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310. Traders These burrowing rodents resemble small gophers or groundhogs with particularly dextrous forepaws, like those of a raccoon. They live in tunnels that they have burrowed out, in family groups of about a half-dozen to dozen, and often prefer to live near certain types of humanoid village or town. (The type that doesn't eat them, mainly.) Traders are famous for their compulsive hoarding instinct, as they collect anything they find shiny or 'smells interesting' and take it away to one of the many chambers within their tunnel systems, which each adult rodent having it's own 'treasure room' that it sleeps in, like a tiny furry dragon atop a 'hoard' that indeed contains a few random coins or even gems, but is mostly junk. Called 'traders,' they have a unique propensity to 'trade' for shiny objects (or food, or interesting smelling things) from humanoids who visit their territory and appear non-threatening. The rodent will tug at or otherwise indicate an item it wants, and will rush off into it's tunnels to go fetch a seemingly random item from it's collection of junk. This item could be a thrown horseshoe, or a lost wedding ring, or a moldy pouch of long-spoiled tobacco or a magical holy symbol found on a dead cleric. If this trade is refused, the rodent will squeak it's displeasure, sometimes hopping up and down to express it's frustration, and scurry back to find a more compelling item to trade (using it's own unique sense of what is 'more valuable' a trade offer, and eventually losing patience and never returning). It can become a bit of a circus as more and more traders notice the scurrying back and forth, and come out with their own 'trade goods' to offer for whatever shiny / interesting things have caught their notice, with the occasional (loud but nonlethal) scuffle breaking out between traders if they are competing for the same shiny.

Using their speak with (burrowing) animals gift, some Gnomes use local dens of traders as a form of bank, keeping lists of what sort of 'shiny' is most attractive to various traders in dens near their home community, and letting a specific trader (with an inexpensive 'favorite trade,' like fancy bits of colored glass) hide away small items they want to keep safe, but don't want lying around their homes.


Ryze Kuja wrote:
I would do magical/supernatural insects, so then you could include bees, ants, flies, grasshoppers, beetles, butterflies, mosquitoes, fleas, etc.

I like focusing on bees because bees in the real world are so varied (you could release it on Honeybee Day, even!) but this is probably an even better idea. Though now I'm also imagining a cottagecore-themed sourcebook and getting very excited.


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Set wrote:
310. Traders

I would have so much fun messing with Traders irl lol. I'd go down there with a bunch of bottlecaps and walk out with 19 wedding rings, 3 rubies, the 400 yr old Holy Symbol of Sir Radraegon the Pious... lol


Set wrote:

310. Traders These burrowing rodents resemble small gophers or groundhogs with particularly dextrous forepaws, like those of a raccoon. They live in tunnels that they have burrowed out, in family groups of about a half-dozen to dozen, and often prefer to live near certain types of humanoid village or town. (The type that doesn't eat them, mainly.) Traders are famous for their compulsive hoarding instinct, as they collect anything they find shiny or 'smells interesting' and take it away to one of the many chambers within their tunnel systems, which each adult rodent having it's own 'treasure room' that it sleeps in, like a tiny furry dragon atop a 'hoard' that indeed contains a few random coins or even gems, but is mostly junk. Called 'traders,' they have a unique propensity to 'trade' for shiny objects (or food, or interesting smelling things) from humanoids who visit their territory and appear non-threatening. The rodent will tug at or otherwise indicate an item it wants, and will rush off into it's tunnels to go fetch a seemingly random item from it's collection of junk. This item could be a thrown horseshoe, or a lost wedding ring, or a moldy pouch of long-spoiled tobacco or a magical holy symbol found on a dead cleric. If this trade is refused, the rodent will squeak it's displeasure, sometimes hopping up and down to express it's frustration, and scurry back to find a more compelling item to trade (using it's own unique sense of what is 'more valuable' a trade offer, and eventually losing patience and never returning). It can become a bit of a circus as more and more traders notice the scurrying back and forth, and come out with their own 'trade goods' to offer for whatever shiny / interesting things have caught their notice, with the occasional (loud but nonlethal) scuffle breaking out between traders if they are competing for the same shiny.

Using their speak with (burrowing) animals gift, some Gnomes use local dens of traders as a form of bank, keeping lists of what sort of 'shiny' is...

Love so many posts on this thread, but this one's freaking amazing. This will make a great side encounter for my group. Have a few players who will get a huge bang out of this.


Traders are fantastic.


A worthless piece of glass could be cut into a bauble that could be traded for an ioun stone.


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A trader set up a warren near my country club. Kept stealing all the golf balls... so we traded it some simple clay sculptures of harmless forest friends.

Mr. Rabbit... Mr. Squirrel... Good times.

Definitely not an explosive


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Insects for Kobold Cleaver's Article :)

311. Raptormantis

Raptormantises are a pack hunting species of mantis that exclusively hunts down spiders, tarantulas, birds, and other predators of insects using swarm tactics. They are almost always found in packs of 100 or more Raptormantises, and they scour jungles and forests high and low looking for predators to swarm. Typical mantises are 2 to 3 inches long and have two raptorial forelegs for grasping and crushing their prey, but Raptormantises are only 1 to 1.25 inches long and have four raptorial forelegs, making them ideal for running down and grappling their prey. They also have far greater eyesight than their mantis cousins; typical mantises have ~10,000 ommatidia in their compound eyes while Raptormantises have ~40,000 ommatidia, allowing them to locate their prey from further away.

312. Goliath Flea

These parasitic fleas grow to be between 30-35mm long and typically act as parasites on huge, gargantuan, and colossal -sized creatures. Like other fleas, they can jump up to 50x their body length, and each species of Goliath Flea is a specialist of sorts when considering the animal species that they use as a host; some species of Goliath Fleas have evolved stronger claws and bristles for clinging to shaggy haired animals like Duarghmusks, while other species have evolved mouthparts that are suitable for piercing the thick hides of Tuskiloxodons.

313. Mirror Scarabs

Mirror Scarabs typically grow to 130-170mm in length and have a reflective carapaces and elytra that they use to blind or annoy potential predators, and have a pair of hindwings for flying that fold under the elytra when not in use. This species of beetle is highly social, but extremely aggressive towards its own kind (notably amongst males), and males will lock horns over the smallest offense, especially over mates.

314. Hydraroach

This species of cockroach is especially hard to kill, and must have their entire bodies destroyed otherwise any surviving body part will restore the cockroach in full and in duplicate. If you slice this cockroach into 3 different pieces, then each body part will reanimate itself within 1d4 hours as 3 different cockroaches. Some Hydraroach infestations can become so bad that burning the building down is the only viable option.

315. Metalmites

This species of termite specifically consumes metallic ores. It's highly uncommon to find metalmites in one's home, but ore mining operations and curators of metal edifices take great care as to prevent metalmite infestations.

316. Symphonic Craybugs

This air and water -breathing species of insect appears like a crayfish, except it doesn't have pincers or claws. Symphonic Craybugs use their violin-shaped femurs and thin wings as a form of stridulation to produce melodies, except while a Symphonic Craybug is above water, it sounds cacophonous and unpleasant as if someone is strangling a cat, but while submerged in water, the melody becomes calming and aesthetically pleasant. Lighthouses sometimes use these insects during periods of intense fog cover to produce music that can be heard throughout the nearby ocean by placing these craybugs in specially designed cages underneath the water, which can then be heard by ships if one of their deckhands submerges their head in the water, thus allowing them to gauge how far they are away from rocks based on the level of sound. Some shipping vessels that regularly rely on these insects for guidance have specially designed sonic receivers that analyze this melody, and these sonic receivers are placed under the waterline in the front of the ship just below the bowsprit, as well as putting sonic receivers along the sides of the ship in the ballast or just below the gundecks.

Aquatic races such as Merfolk and Aquatic Elves sometimes keep these creatures as pets for their calming and mellifluous melodies.

317. Ectoplasmic Hornets

Also called "Shaper Hornets", these stingless Hornets have the rare psionic gift of being able to create and shape ectoplasm out of organic material as a base reagent, such as grass, leaves, or woodchips, which they then use to create their hive. This ectoplasm is milky-white in color, and while these hornets do not have stingers, they can retrieve any organic material and then form their own ectoplasmic stingers. These ectoplasmic stingers can take a variety of shapes, but are most oftenly barbed hooks or arrows, which they use to repeatedly lacerate the skin of anything that is threatening them. Like most hornets or wasps, Ectoplasmic Hornets are highly aggressive and will "lock on" to the mind of their aggressors as per the psionic power Psychic Tracking, and then relentlessly and mercilessly hunt down those who have threatened them.

318. Ethereal Fusion Ants

These ants are extraordinarily small compared to other ants, and typically are between 1 to 1.2mm long, but they have the extraordinary ability to plane shift into the Ethereal Plane to avoid predators. Furthermore, if their hive or queen is truly threatened, then they retreat to the Ethereal Plane and a multitude of hundreds of ants may fuse together into one much larger ant, forming one tiny-sized 1 to 4lb ant on the Material Plane (the size of the larger ant is dependent upon how many ants fuse together). It is not uncommon for anteaters to flee in horror when 10-20 of these tiny-size ants have been formed in defense of the hive. Once the threat has been neutralized or frightened away, they re-enter the Ethereal Plane and de-fuse into their normal smaller ant forms.

319. Discorporating Flies

Also known as "Phoenix Flies", these flies are the masters at cheating death, because as soon as they sense a threat like someone is going to smash them with a rolled newspaper, they discorporate into hundreds of ephemeral bursts of flame and seemingly vanish, and then reappear, or "re-corporate", between 10-30 minutes later. These flies may discorporate like this only once in their lives, but have a lifespan of roughly 28-30 days.

320. Conquerer Ants

Conquerer Ants do not create hives, and instead rely upon running down and swarming their prey, and scavenging their prey's resources or their young. As such, they are in a constant state of migration, and they attack bee hives, birds, rodents, anything they can get their mandibles around. Conquerer Ants are much larger than normal ants, and are roughly 45-50mm long. Queens are typically 160-180mm long, and travel with their swarm, and will lay between 300,000 to 500,000 eggs each week. Conquerer Ants pose a significant threat to all living things, including humans and humanoids. Many humanoid settlements have indeed fought off these ants, but there have also been some settlements that have been completely overrun by them as well.

321. Electric Dust Moth

This moth has wings that generate a mild static field that magnetizes dust, pollen, and other fine specks into a sphere of trapped particles that encapsulate it. Not only does this act as a crude form of camouflage, but it is hopefully unpalatable to predators who will then spit the moth out or simply refrain from considering it as a meal.

322. Hypnotic Monarch

This butterfly has wings that swiftly swirl and change colors in an attempt to hypnotize predators. Trauma therapists are sometimes also amateur lepidopterists who collect and keep a small kaleidoscope of these butterflies as to relieve stress and for calming and soothing their patients, as well as law enforcement authorities who employ these butterflies as stupefying and entrancing interrogative aids.

323. Manglefly

This species of damselfly is a predatory insect that is roughly 18-22mm long that specifically hunts down other insects. Mangleflies produce a toxin on their tarsus (Contact Poison, affects insects only) and use it to incapacitate other insects as if using Disfiguring Touch and Touch of Blindness spells. Although all insects invariably become blinded by this toxin, various insects react differently to the Disfiguring Touch portion of this toxin, as some insects lose the ability to fly, others become confused or disoriented, and some even lose mobility and dexterity in their legs.

324. Bloodhoppers

This grasshopper cousin is a hematophagous insect that lives by consuming the blood of animals. When solitary, these Bloodhoppers are quite innocuous, and are strangely poor carriers of bloodborne illnesses and diseases. However, under sufficient levels of drought due to lack of livestock and animals in an area, these bloodhoppers release a swell of seratonin in their brains, chemically altering their thinking and behavior. Firstly, they become gregarious and will breed rapidly, and secondly, they will then begin to migrate as swarming locusts in search for animals. Once they begin to swarm, they are a deadly plague upon the land, where animals and humans alike are all in danger.

Humanoid settlements have long been accustomed to dealing with the plague that are Bloodhopper swarms since time immemorial, and can use a litany of various techniques for thwarting them. Bloodhoppers are highly sensitive to the smell of garlic and onions, so juicing garlic and/or onions and mixing it with water and then misting it across buildings and barns makes it nearly intolerable for them to enter. Additionally, chickens, ducks, birds, and other feathered fowl are natural predators of Bloodhoppers, and Bloodhoppers will flee from them, so releasing these fowl from their cages while the locusts pass can provide them with a veritable smorgasbord. Furthermore, Bloodhoppers have small mouths, so coating the skin of livestock and humans with flour can cause the Bloodhopper's mouth to "gum up", and they become incapable of biting and eventually die from starvation.


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325. 'BOT Flies...
Similar to metalmites, these flying insects are drawn to metals as food source. However, 'BOT Flies specifically prefer worked metal, rather than raw ore. 'BOT Flies also require electrical fields to be present to incubate their eggs... making these pests especially troublesome for Androids, which can become infested with 'BOT Fly larva.

326. Welding Worms...
These magnetic worms are literally attracted to metal by magnetic forces beyond their own control. The worms are polarized from end to end, and contacting metal completes the circuit, generating significant amounts of heat isolated within the worms' bodies. As they crawl along the metallic surface(s), the run a bead behind them of liquid metal... fusing any metals they may cross along the way.

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327. Wandering Wasps These metallic blue, green or violet wasps live in hives made of a thin material that is light like paper, yet water-resistant like resin or chitin (they've invented plastic!). Their hives are therefore relatively light, and contain only their hive-queen and eggs and larva, while the rest of them hold onto crafted lines of their hive-building material and lift their entire small hive into the air, with the power of their hundreds of wings, keeping it in the sky for hours at a time, and only coming to rest in inaccessible areas such as the tops of buttes, or ledges on cliff-faces, where they feel safe from predators.

Wandering Wasp hives are about the size of a beach ball, and strangely beautiful, the same metallic blue, green or violet as their inhabitants, with unique patterns as they add or dismantle chambers organically, as needed based on the number of pupae or larvae present that season, but rarely weighing more than three or four pounds, once emptied of the inhabitants (who tend to weigh more than the structure itself). Collectors pay top coin for empty hives, particularly in colors they don't already own. Somewhat more ethical collectors pay top coin for *working* hives, whose inhabitants haven't been killed...

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328. Centurypedes An elven pet, only seen in Kyonin (or on Castrovel), centurypedes live exactly 100 years, for reasons that are not clear, and as such tend to be popular childhood pets, gotten when an elven child is born, and dying on the day she becomes an adult. They start off diminutive things, but grow to the size of cats (T) or dogs (S), or even larger hounds (M) if sufficiently fed and pampered. They are far more intelligent than most 'vermin,' and have the same intelligence (and personality) of a dog, bonding very strongly to 'their person' and generally coming across as stand-offish or even territorial around strangers (even the parents of their bonded child!).

Centurypedes are not venomous, but can bite with the same force as any other animal of similar size. Elves tend to lie and suggest that they are poisonous, 'but not to elves,' or that they are much more intelligent, or various other things, as the whim takes them.

The death of one's constant companion at the age of adulthood is something of a cruel rite of passage among the elves of Castrovel (the custom is less popular on Golarion, and not practiced by the various 'Forlorn' cultures of Snowcaster, Mwangi, Mordant Spire, etc. elves), and elves sometimes say, 'centurypedes exist to teach children about death.'

In open mockery of tradition, Queen Telandia of Kyonin has a huge centurypede that wraps around her dwelling when she retires for the night, and is said to be 300 years old, kept from death by unknown means. When it was suggested by a staunch traditionalist that she showed weakness and childish sentiment by refusing to accept natural death, she said, "Tell it to my husband. When you meet him in the afterlife." Since then she has taken to riding 'Leggysnake' around town for public functions, just to tweak the noses of traditionalists, and earning the love of many of her custom-flouting people.

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Ryze Kuja wrote:

318. Ethereal Fusion Ants

These ants are extraordinarily small compared to other ants, and typically are between 1 to 1.2mm long, but they have the extraordinary ability to plane shift into the Ethereal Plane to avoid predators. Furthermore, if their hive or queen is truly threatened, then they retreat to the Ethereal Plane and a multitude of hundreds of ants may fuse together into one much larger ant, forming one tiny-sized 1 to 4lb ant on the Material Plane (the size of the larger ant is dependent upon how many ants fuse together). It is not uncommon for anteaters to flee in horror when 10-20 of these tiny-size ants have been formed in defense of the hive. Once the threat has been neutralized or frightened away, they re-enter the Ethereal Plane and de-fuse into their normal smaller ant forms.

Ooh, these are indeed my favorite! "With our powers combined!" :)


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329. Fangwood Finches
These clever weaverbirds are not exclusively found in the Fangwood, but they have been most successful there. Like other weaverbirds, Fangwood finches weave their nests--however, they prefer to almost exclusively use the silk of giant spiders to do it. To make this possible, they have developed extremely sharp beaks and a habit of dipping their claws in certain tree resins, enabling them to cut easily through old gossamer and carry it without getting entangled. Nests woven from spider's silk are both incredibly sturdy and nearly waterpoof, allowing them to place their nests in harder-to-reach areas and avoid predators.

Interestingly, giant spiders rarely bother Fangwood finches unless a careless bird gets ensnared. In fact, intelligent spider creatures, such as aranea and ettercaps, have sometimes been known to help finches get un-stuck, and many Fangwood finches make their nests strikingly close to the nests of their "suppliers". It is speculated that the finches and spiders have formed something of a symbiotic relationship, with the finches helping to clean out old webbing that no longer catches viable morsels, clean out dead insects, and perhaps even lure larger predators close to a spider's hunting grounds.

A Fangwood finch has pale, silvery plumage and disproportionately long, spindly talons. It has the statistics of a thrush, but with Improved Critical (bite) as a bonus feat and a +8 racial bonus on Reflex saves to escape being entangled in webbing or netting. As a familiar, it grants the caster a +3 bonus on Perform (string instruments).

328. Etherweave Finches
There are several species of bird that have found their way onto the Ethereal Plane and managed to establish stable populations. Of these, the most diverse and successful have been the weaverbirds. There are, in fact, at least four well-known subspecies of ethereal weaverbirds, which are suspected to have crossed onto the Ethereal Plane a long, long, long time ago. The original variety is called the etherweave finch, believed to be a descendant of Fangwood finches that lived near the hunting grounds of phase spiders. The phase spiders either deliberately brought the etherweave finches over--perhaps as some treats for their young or to keep as pets--or accidentally took them along for the ride. Fangwood finches are, after all, quite unafraid of giant spiders, and often flock towards them to escape "real" predators like hawks and bobcats.

Regardless of the original relationship, etherweave finches have since evolved into close symbiotic partners of the phase spiders. Etherweave finches never harm the young of their hosts. Instead, they have three main sources of protein: picking the bones of the spiders' prey, eating the parasites clinging to the phase spider's back, and devouring the sweet-smelling eggs of the xill. It is quite common to see a whole colony of upwards of forty etherweave finches fluttering around a phase spider nest following a disturbance, especially if they've spotted some xill on the way. Phase spiders, for their part, seem greatly fond of etherweave finches, and often know every finch in their nest by name.

Relationships with Xill (cw for, well, xill stuff):
Though finches do not gather in great enough numbers to truly threaten xill, they are a terrible nuisance, clicking and strumming to alert their hosts and sometimes even divebombing at the xills' eyes. Moreover, if they find a paralyzed host of xill eggs, they act with unsettling, surgical precision, massing over the point of entry in a gorey display and devouring every egg laid within. When operating as a flock in this way, up to five etherweave finches at a time can Aid Another on Heal checks to remove xill eggs from someone. They have a +3 Heal skill. Each additional "healer" inflicts 1 point of damage per attempt (for a potential maximum of 1d4+5).

Phase spiders can usually survive this process, and always take half damage from such attempts. Non-arachnids may not be so lucky. Being devoured from the outside in may still be preferable to the alternative, but not by much. Xill, of course, are even less fond of "eggeaters", and many xills have become deathly afraid of birds the way humans are afraid of snakes and spiders.

An etherweave finch familiar grants the caster a +3 bonus on Heal checks. They have the statistics of Fangwood finches, and can be trained to target other parasites the way they target xill eggs. They can also speak Aklo if their master can understand it. However, familiar or no, they are ill-tempered, jealous and prone to feuding, and this combined with their sharp beaks makes them a little dangerous to keep around. Etherweave finches are a speckled gray-and-white, like little clumps of ash with beady black eyes. Due to sound being muffled in the Ethereal Plane, instead of chirping, they express themselves by pecking, plucking at the strings of nearby webbing like the strings of a harp. If agitated, they also make a sharp clicking sound, which turns into a noisy chittering if a whole flock is in a temper. Which they usually are.

I actually have 2-3 other ideas for the other ethereal weaverbirds, but I went kind of overboard here. If anyone else wants to add a variety, feel free!


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And yes, that Improved Critical (bite) means that these birds have "bite -1 (1d2-5, 19-20/x2)" in their statblock. Tremble at their 2d2-10 critical hits, people.


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Seriously, why do I keep doing creepy parasites? Well, I needed to do one just to fix the number I got wrong.

331. Wolfswyrm
This tiny reptilian creature may be smaller than the circumference of a button when coiled, but it is one of the most hated enemies of any shapeshifter. Up close, they almost resemble seven-legged imperial dragons, skittering in rapid circles like scaly green centipedes.

Wolfswyrm are parasites that prey exclusively on shapeshifters, skittering or swimming around at unheard of speeds (with the help of their odd-numbered legs) to generate tiny, simplistic magical glyphs that bind their own form to that of their host. In this way, when their host changes form, so will they, changing just enough to accommodate the new body--and stealing some precious nutrients during the shift. A werebear's wolfswyrm might crawl through the werebear's fur during the full moon like oversized fleas, only to take the form of internal, more easily-hidden parasites come sunrise.

Wolfswyrm do not bite or trouble their host in any noticeable way. They feed on the shapeshifting magic itself, hijacking it into a kind of food source. A shapeshifter isn't likely to notice if, when growing to the size of the giant, they are a dime or two shorter than they might have been. However, wolfswyrm are easily detected by fairly simple magic, since they are generating constant minuscule fields of transmutation and abjuration, making them a dangerous and frustrating liability. They are also primarily attracted to frequent shapeshifters, and many werewolf hunters keep a few in a jar on hand at all times. Also, they're yucky.


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332: Funky Fungus
It smells like a skunk and a mink had a shootout. It preys on other funguses so it sometimes forces goblins to wash between their toes. It's a more revolting green than a goblin too.


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Set wrote:

328. Centurypedes An elven pet, only seen in Kyonin (or on Castrovel), centurypedes live exactly 100 years, for reasons that are not clear, and as such tend to be popular childhood pets, gotten when an elven child is born, and dying on the day she becomes an adult. They start off diminutive things, but grow to the size of cats (T) or dogs (S), or even larger hounds (M) if sufficiently fed and pampered. They are far more intelligent than most 'vermin,' and have the same intelligence (and personality) of a dog, bonding very strongly to 'their person' and generally coming across as stand-offish or even territorial around strangers (even the parents of their bonded child!).

Centurypedes are not venomous, but can bite with the same force as any other animal of similar size. Elves tend to lie and suggest that they are poisonous, 'but not to elves,' or that they are much more intelligent, or various other things, as the whim takes them.

The death of one's constant companion at the age of adulthood is something of a cruel rite of passage among the elves of Castrovel (the custom is less popular on Golarion, and not practiced by the various 'Forlorn' cultures of Snowcaster, Mwangi, Mordant Spire, etc. elves), and elves sometimes say, 'centurypedes exist to teach children about death.'

In open mockery of tradition, Queen Telandia of Kyonin has a huge centurypede that wraps around her dwelling when she retires for the night, and is said to be 300 years old, kept from death by unknown means. When it was suggested by a staunch traditionalist that she showed weakness and childish sentiment by refusing to accept natural death, she said, "Tell it to my husband. When you meet him in the afterlife." Since then she has taken to riding 'Leggysnake' around town for public functions, just to tweak the noses of traditionalists, and earning the love of many of her custom-flouting people.

Set.

You are being awesome again.

Stahhhhhp iiiiiiit!

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333. Ice Kelp This freshwater 'seaweed' grows in long strands from the floor of a lake bottom to the surface, or in slower-moving rivers, with pale blue berries growing along it's length. The leaves of the plant are edible, and a certain number of them can be plucked without killing the plant, and taste something like kale, which makes it... unpopular, but a staple for the poorer folk of Irrisen, who eat it in a disgusting mushy stew, or slapped down between two slabs of bread to make a 'kelp sandwich.' The seasonal berries are a bit of a delicacy, and piquant in flavor, usually eaten mashed into a jam, and sold to the higher classes of people by those who forage for them, as they are worth far more than the poorer ice-kelp-harvesters can often afford to 'waste' on their own sustenance.

What is fairly unique about ice kelp is that it is completely immune to cold and frost, and has an unusual alchemical property that keeps the water around it from freezing, allowing it to flourish in even the coldest climes (and also allowing fish and other water-life to thrive there, as well). Attempts to create an elixir or salve from Ice Kelp that helps *people* to resist cold or frostbite remains unsuccessful, to date, and neither the leaves nor berries, once removed from the living plant, display any unusual properties of this sort.

Glacier Lake, in Irrisen, and the nearby stretches of the Frozen Road (especially), Marbleflow and Rimeflow Rivers are the only places known on Golarion to harbor Ice Kelp, although a suspiciously similar strain thrives on the Elemental Plane of Water...

(Random foodstuffs for frostbound Irrisen of PF 1e. Also, bored with bugs. So plants now. Go plants! Very slowly, but with gravitas!)

334. Moonflower Orchid This desert dwelling plant has deep, deep roots, with a single small plant having a fleshy fibrous root that can extend six feet or more underground, and swelling to store water during dry seasons. During the day, it is a small unassuming nub of wood with some tiny twisted branches covered with tiny green evergreen needles, bitter and unappealing, but at night, the needles unfurl into slender leaves, and the plant blooms a single central flower, pale as the moon, with pastel shades of violet, green or blue. The leaves gather up any dew that settles and stores the excess within the deep taproot, and the flower produces a strong pleasant scent that attracts pollinating insects or bets from far and wide to sup at it's nectar, and spread it's pollen far across the desert. The scent makes for a popular and subtle perfume, valued for it's extreme rarity. The water filled taproot is of more immediate use to a dehydrated traveler, however, and it may contain one to three days rations worth of water, although digging it up and wringing the water out will obviously kill the Moon Orchid...

The Moon Orchid is rumored to be the same plant as the legendary Sun Orchid, and some foolish sorts wait patiently for the sun to rise and the Moon Orchid to 'change' into the Sun Orchid. This obviously never happens, and the two flowers don't even occur near each other. A true Sun Orchid hunter will recognize that they are in the wrong micro-climate/terrain entirely if they find a Moon Orchid.

(Because of... stuff, I've been hankering to contribute stuff to the messageboards again recently. I'm too cheap to go to therapy, so I get out my mid-life-crisis nonsense by creating stuff for imaginary worlds that I only get to visit. I'm sure that's a totally healthy outlet. Ya.) :)

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335. Wee Wolves Wee wolves live in forests thick with bramble and shrubbery, as any predators larger than themselves can quickly snap them up and devour them, as they are identical in size and behavior to normal wolves, but are about the size of field mice. They travel in packs consisting of two to four adult pairs and assorted juveniles, and devour small rodents and decent sized insects such as beetles, using traditional wolf hunting tactics, but remain under the cover of thick undergrowth, to avoid predation by fisher cats, owls or similar larger predators. Actual wolves, when they encounter wee wolves, find them disturbing, smelling like full-sized adult wolves, and yet being smaller even than wolf cubs. This causes a discomfort in the much larger wolves, as they have conflicting instincts about the situation, and so prefer to drive the wee wolves scurrying away. Wee wolves are common companions to communities of sprites, who proudly state that they first brought wee wolves across from the First World, although the veracity of this claim remains unproven.

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336. Pseudodragon Turtles I suppose the imperial court in Taldor has all the excruciating details about which Army of Expedition brought back to the royal court a dragon egg several centuries ago, and how that officer who presented it to the Emperor got a title out of it, and blah-blah-blah, but the important bit for the purposes of this entry are that this particular dragon turtle egg was hatched (quite likely with magical aid) in the freshwater pond dug at the center of the royal gardens for just this purpose, since the current Emperor liked the idea of having their own pet dragon turtle. It is not clear whether the fresh water, the circumstances of birth, the size of the pond or the spells used to keep it alive had some deletorious effect on the hatchling, but over the next century it grew only to the size of a regular snapping turtle, no bigger than a man, if fearsomely large by the standards of that species. (The Emperor went to their death convinced that this was 'normal growth' for the unstudied species, by advisors who didn't want to suffer the consequences of a tantrum.) It's not terribly much brighter than a normal dog, can breathe a scalding faceful of steam that blinds anyone who provokes it, and has bitten the feet off of any royal swans or ducks introduced to the pond, which has become it's territory. More unusually, it has laid eggs of it's own, which got fertilized, no one knows how, and so now many muckity mucks in Taldor who gotten royal favor at some point or another, have a (smaller, dumber) pseudo-dragon turtle in their own gardens, hissing threateningly at their terrified peasant gardeners and mangling their waterfowl. Taldans are weird.

Note, after a few centuries, the pseudo-dragon turtle may pick up some more 'dragon turtle-y' characteristics, and begin to hoard shiny objects at the center of their pond, and capsize small pleasure punts on the surface of 'their pond,' and bite the hands off of any gardeners sent to smack them into better behavior...

(I wanted to get a pun about pseudo dragon turtles using echolocation underwater to make a pseudo echo, but even am not that wicked.)

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(Ugh. I said I was done with bugs. I thought I was done with bugs. I wanted to be done with bugs. And here are two more bugs! Such, as it is, is my brain. Fulla bugs.)

337. Flutterbyes These abnormally large moths have six wings, each about two-thirds as wide across as a typical four-winged moths wings. Despite their freakish size, as small as a large rodent or small cat, and a fearsome looking pair of mandibles, these moths have no effective bite attack, the mandibles being merely grippers it uses to hold a flower stalk steady while it feeds on the nectar within.

It's only means of defense is the scaly powder that most moths have on their wings, which it carries in surplus in a pouch on it's underside, and emits in a cloud to affect a single adjacent square whenever it is attacked or feels threatened (unless it is slain outright in the attack, in which case it just dies...). The 'dust' of a flutterbye is more powerfully allergenic than that of a typical moth, causing choking fits and watering eyes (sickened until a save is made, dazzled until eyes are flushed out with water as a full round action). This is a nuisance, at best, but enough to distract many predators long enough for it to fly away while they are sneezing and blinking their eyes. Against other insects and arthropods, it is particularly effective, and a larger-than-normal spider who attempts to feed on a flutterbye finds that the tiny scales work their way into the creature's breathing spiracles, and it suffocates within a few minutes. Generally this does the flutterbye no good, as the predator will have already killed and partially devoured it by then, but it gets it's revenge post-mortem. (This effect only works on bugs up to small size. Larger 'giant' insects, arachnids, etc. are unaffected, as their breathing spiracles are too large to be gummed up by the 'dust.')

The main predators for flutterbyes are falcons, hawks and eagles, who strike so fast and move so far beyond their target, that they are out of the flutterbyes 5 ft. range long before it retaliates with it's scaly cloud, and owls, who appear to be completely immune to the sickened and dazzled conditions of the scaly cloud.

Flutterbye 'powder' is a delicate structure, looking like a snowflake under close vision, and does not 'keep,' making it unsuitable to gather and attempt to use later, and the flutterbye itself generally only has a single 'dose' on it, taking about eight hours to recharge if it has to spew out a cloud for defense.

338. Threshers These rodent sized mantids have the usual four legs and two scythe-like limbs that can lash out at prey. More unusual even than their size, is their intelligence, as they build nests in the deep jungles similar to the nests of squirrels or the lodges of beavers, from fallen sticks, plant matter and leaves. Long assumed to be carnivorous, the threshers hunt down small animals, or even carrion, and drag it back to their nest, taking it into the central chamber and leaving it to feed the fungus that grows there. That fungus is actually the only food the threshers feed off of, and their hunting is merely to provide it with the meat and blood it needs to thrive.

Threshers avoid or ignore any living creature of size Small or larger, not recognizing them as prey (although a small corpse may be dragged away, or even rendered into smaller portions and carried back to the nest), but an unwary familiar could find itself under attack!

Because of their very restrictive diet, and the inability to keep lone threshers alive away from their collective group, there has been no known successful attempt to 'domesticate' one, although some groups of Song'o halflings seem to have some sort of arrangement where a nest of threshers feel comfortable living near, or even *in* their villages. As threshers both eliminate other small pest animals, and meticulously 'clean' the nearby area of loose foliage and sticks, in the process of upgrading their nest, the advantage for the halflings is clear. In return, the halflings provide the threshers with the bits of bone, sinew, hide, organ and offal from their own kills that they have no use for, so that the threshers provide double duty as 'organic waste disposal.'


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339. Constrictor Cats...
These elongated mammals are generally small in size and resemble a cross between a common house cat and a centipede... having multiple pairs of legs sticking out of its long torso, every 6-12 inches, or so. Larger specimens grow to be size medium, and perhaps even larger, if their environment allows. Like reptiles, constrictor cats will both grow to match their territory, and stunt their own growth to never outgrow their available space.

Constrictor cats still squeeze their prey to death, even though they can literally have hundreds of claws. They live in grasslands and forests, with some of them developing habits and features to support borrowing underground like gigantic weasels.

Locals sometimes call constrictor cats "CATerpillars" because of their shape and movement.


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340. Veetapu

This tiny-sized 1.25 to 1.75lb rodent is similar to a vole, or a common field mouse, and typically live in series of interconnected subterranean burrows and underground nests just below the earth surface. Impressively, some Veetapu colonies have burrow networks that are like small cities and can span the size of entire meadows. Veetapu aren't blind but they have very poor eyesight, and they benefit from a continuous Detect Magic effect, so they find their way around by placing Arcane Marks throughout their burrows and then Detecting them.

Veetapu are known best for the high-pitched chirping sounds that they make, such as if you hand them a piece of cheese or peanut, they will chirp appreciatively in a way that sounds like "veet! veet!". Likewise, if they detect a strong source of magic (such as an adventurer's gear), they will become infatuated and chirp delightedly in a way that sounds like "tapu! tapu!". Ostensibly, their name "Veetapu" is an amalgamation of these two onomatopoeia "veet!" and "tapu!"

Veetapu are exclusively found in one area of the world: The Mysidian Veldt. And once upon a time, Veetapu colonies were thriving, and could be found throughout the veldt. However, a large portion of the Mysidian Veldt was recently captured by the Votavi elves and terraformed with their foul dark magic to blot out the sun, thus annihilating the Veetapu's food sources (typically plant roots, fruits, and nuts), so Veetapu are currently in danger of becoming extinct.

In response to this, some mages have begun to use Veetapu as familiars (use Rat statblock except remove low-light vision and Scent ability, add a -8 to sight-based Perception (racial), and add Constant Detect Magic, Arcane Mark at will, master gets +3 Spellcraft checks) as to ensure their survival.


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Set wrote:
Because of their very restrictive diet, and the inability to keep lone threshers alive away from their collective group, there has been no known successful attempt to 'domesticate' one, although some groups of Song'o halflings seem to have some sort of arrangement where a nest of threshers feel comfortable living near, or even *in* their villages. As threshers both eliminate other small pest animals, and meticulously 'clean' the nearby area of loose foliage and sticks, in the process of upgrading their nest, the advantage for the halflings is clear. In return, the halflings provide the threshers with the bits of bone, sinew, hide, organ and offal from their own kills that they have no use for, so that the threshers provide double duty as 'organic waste disposal.'

But what a place to raise your Tiny children!


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341. Lion Beaver

This 900 to 1,200lbs beaver is a semi-aquatic, herbivorous rodent that has long and durable incisors and consumes tree bark, aquatic plants, nuts, fruits, and various grasses and leaves. Despite the name "Lion Beaver", these rodents have no relation to cats, and are in fact named for both the male and female Lion Beaver having a luxurious lion-like mane that grows around their neck, shoulders, and upper back. Like their smaller beaver cousins, Lion Beavers create dams out of trees, branches, rocks, mud, and various foliage in freshwater habitats such as rivers, lakes, and ponds, and are extremely beneficial to their ecosystems because their dams are so vital to expanding and preserving wetlands and peatlands. In some kingdoms that recognize this vital role, the hunting or killing of Lion Beavers is highly illegal, as well as disturbing or destroying their dams and lodges. However, some shameful hunters poach these creatures and sell their furs in lucrative black markets that exist outside these kingdoms.

Lion Beaver females have their estrus cycle once every 3 years, and gestation is typically 400-425 days, and as such, Lion Beavers are somewhat scarce. But, they usually have litters between 8 to 15 kits. Lion Beavers have a disproportionally large effect on their environments and the biodiversity of their areas, and the loss of a single Lion Beaver can cause significant damage to an ecosystem. Their dams are influential in creating ponds, diverting rivers and streams (thus expanding the wetlands to new areas), raising water tables, and can even change the temperature of the water during the summer and winter months.

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Kobold Cleaver wrote:
Set wrote:
Because of their very restrictive diet, and the inability to keep lone threshers alive away from their collective group, there has been no known successful attempt to 'domesticate' one, although some groups of Song'o halflings seem to have some sort of arrangement where a nest of threshers feel comfortable living near, or even *in* their villages. As threshers both eliminate other small pest animals, and meticulously 'clean' the nearby area of loose foliage and sticks, in the process of upgrading their nest, the advantage for the halflings is clear. In return, the halflings provide the threshers with the bits of bone, sinew, hide, organ and offal from their own kills that they have no use for, so that the threshers provide double duty as 'organic waste disposal.'
But what a place to raise your Tiny children!

Oh, ha, I didn't even think of that. Clearly the halflings have some way to mark their kids as 'do not eat.' Some sort of local plant perhaps used as a smelly salve that has less charitable neighbors call their kids 'stinky.' :)


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Set wrote:

Clearly the halflings have some way to mark their kids as 'do not eat.' Some sort of local plant perhaps used as a smelly salve that has less charitable neighbors call their kids 'stinky.' :)

If only there was someplace to find such an inconsequential plant...

Some place... where such flora and its uses could be found...
Some place... that made it 'exist'.

Dark Archive

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Pizza Lord wrote:
Set wrote:

Clearly the halflings have some way to mark their kids as 'do not eat.' Some sort of local plant perhaps used as a smelly salve that has less charitable neighbors call their kids 'stinky.' :)

If only there was someplace to find such an inconsequential plant...

Some place... where such flora and its uses could be found...
Some place... that made it 'exist'.

Eh, too boring. 'Stinky plant that made-up bug 338 doesn't like' doesn't seem to warrant an entry of it's own. Easier to just say that threshers *hate* the smell of garlic or coffee or something, and the kids parents all smear a little garlic or splash a little coffee on their trousers when they send them out of the house into the thesher-inhabited parts of the village.

Anywho, no more bugs!

342. Stone Lizards Tiny cousins to the basilisk, these wall-climbing lizards have blunt features, spiky growths on their back, a nub of a tail and six stumpy legs. Their most dramatic feature, however is that, when startled, their eyes glow green and *they* turn to stone, gaining hardness 5 and *generally* being immune to most attempts at predation. Due to their hardness and the spiky growths on their carapace, predators attempting to bite them take damage equal to the damage they would have done if they fail to penetrate the stone lizard's hardness (and generally do not repeat the experiment!). The self-petrification generally lasts an hour, but ends immediately if the stone lizard is damaged while in stone form (any attack that does six or more hit points of damage), which occasionally occurs when a dim-witted stone lizard is startled while high up on a tree or wall, and petrifies, and promptly falls to the ground, whereupon it may break, if the surface is not soft enough...

Rocket-scientists, they are not.

Stone lizards are kept as pets by some Mwangi cultures, or even eaten by others. (The standard method is to startle them, then pick up the petrified lizard and smash it against a bigger rock, whereupon it reverts to broken bits of dying lizard, although connoisseurs say that the meat tastes less bitter when they have not petrified recently, and smoke them into unconsciousness before killing them, so that they do not petrify before death.) Normally stone lizards eat tree fungus, fruit, insects and bird eggs, when they can get them, but in domesticity they can be fed almost anything, and can grow up to the size of a small dog, at which point they become lazy and incapable of climbing any significant height, or running for any length of time, just lounging around soaking up the sun, eating whatever is put in front of their mouths, and refusing to even petrify when 'startled' by people they already know well and no longer regard as a threat.


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343. Creeping Maiden
This unusual entity is the subject of many a myth and old wives' tale, and it's easy to understand why--it is quite the sight to witness, a tiny wisp of pale, ethereal mist pouring over the ground, trailed by a strange retinue of spiders and insects like a macabre parade. But creeping maiden is no undead horror or spell-gone-wrong. It is a very small species of ooze made of a substance barely thicker than vapor.

Creeping maiden is quite harmless to animals, and feeds strictly on certain nutrients found in the partially-developed spores of certain fungi. As it is not especially corrosive, however, it relies on the various tiny animals that pass through it, affected in the process as if by dominate monster, to chew up and regurgitate the the fungi so that it can begin digesting.

Many insects and arachnids have evolved to be naturally repelled by creeping maiden, and it makes a very effective bug repellent and mold remover for those halfling and dwarf communities who learn to cultivate it. It smells something like a cross between garlic and lavender.


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344. Winkweb- These large(although far from dire or even monsterous), harmless, downy spiders are completely ordinary in all ways save for their unique ability to move the extra flap of chitin on their lower back to make it look as if the large red spots found there are actually large eyes that are blinking, as if they were a bored animal lazily observing prey. This keeps them safe from most predation other than those of immature humanoids, who often use them to pull pranks upon the unobservant or dull-witted. On occasion a winkweb has several sets of "eyes" upon its back instead of a normal pair, some consider these spiders omens of good or bad luck, whichever is important at the moment.


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Pizza Lord wrote:
Set wrote:

Clearly the halflings have some way to mark their kids as 'do not eat.' Some sort of local plant perhaps used as a smelly salve that has less charitable neighbors call their kids 'stinky.' :)

If only there was someplace to find such an inconsequential plant...

Some place... where such flora and its uses could be found...
Some place... that made it 'exist'.

It's not a smelly plant, at all. It's moths...

345. Thresherbane Moth

These near-microscoptic moths are actually parasites that have a strange diet consisting of Halfling and Gnome dander. Kids are especially dirty, and thus attract more of the Thresherbane Moth than more well-groomed adults that often grease/wax their hair or wear headgear (surpressing the release of airborne dander).

The Thresherbane Moth gets its name from a bacteria that nearly all such moths carry from larva through pupa, into adulthood. This bacteria is absolutely devistating to the Threshers' fungus food supply. The moths are guaranteed to be present on Halfling and Gnome children, and evolution has taught Threshers that an infestation of this bacteria is always fatal to the nests' food supply.

Some say that Threshers have developed special senses to help them avoid the "scent" of the Thresherbane Moth (or its specific bacteria), but it has yet to be confirmed... or even actually studied.


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Oh, well, I guess now we both made one. :P

That said, the idea that halfling children just constantly have butterflies fluttering in their hair is unspeakably cute. Those aren't parasites, they're adorable fashion accessories! "She's shed her moths" could be an expression for a halfling coming of age, there could be controversial adult halfling aesthetics that feature butterfly pins and motifs...


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345. Calistran mites These insects are actually miniscule beetles, so small as to be almost invisible to the naked eye. They have a voracious appetite for humanoid blood, but due to their small size leave behind a very small rash that is easily ignored save for some minor irritation. But the big problem these little guys cause is that their bites(not the simple presence of the insects themselves, contrary to popular belief) cause people who have been bitten by the same colony to be somewhat empathic towards one another, treating one another as one step higher in terms of attitude, as if they have succeeded on a Diplomacy check. This stacks with other mundane Diplomacy checks, and in the case of numerous successes can sometimes result in people living in the same household becoming incredibly close over a rather small period of time. While they are not literal love bugs, more than a few people have blamed sudden and confusing episodes of infidelity upon them, hence the name. Unfortunately, they are very vulnerable to even the slightest change in temperature, creating some truly fair weather friends. Perhaps ironically, Calistrians of all stripes truly hate the little pests, while Urgathoans find them to be good luck, and most cells lacking a true Cleric maintain colonies of the beetles to encourage a gruesome sense of camaraderie.


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Kobold Cleaver wrote:

Oh, well, I guess now we both made one. :P

That said, the idea that halfling children just constantly have butterflies fluttering in their hair is unspeakably cute. Those aren't parasites, they're adorable fashion accessories! "She's shed her moths" could be an expression for a halfling coming of age, there could be controversial adult halfling aesthetics that feature butterfly pins and motifs...

I prefer "lost her moths" instead as it brings to mind the image of halfling girls in particular who don't want to grow up going in search of the beautiful moths/butterflies that used to hang around them all the time, or wear butterfly pins and motifs as an almost tomboyish fashion- no, I am NOT growing up, I am still a kid, see! And I will still play in the mud/go play hide and seek/insert other fun activity here instead of going to boring old school! Alternatively, some could actively attempt to chase the butterflies away, as they wish to grow up a little too fast...


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It's almost as if Desna is watching out for these children... there might be a reason Halflings and Gnomes worship her.

Dark Archive

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VoodistMonk wrote:
It's almost as if Desna is watching out for these children... there might be a reason Halflings and Gnomes worship her.

And now I'm loving this idea. Awesome, the idea that some sort of larval moth only thrives in the hair dander of some sort of children. (I would prefer gnomish, since they are already bizarre. But a parasite or even fungus that infests dwarven beards preferentially, requiring them to clean them fussily and regularly, or else get 'stinkbeard' could be amusing as well. Cue the inevitable stinkbeard breakout and a bunch of dwarves having to endure the shame of being deloused because *someone* had poor beard hygiene that lasted for the month or so it takes for them to reach a breeding cycle and start spreading to other beards in the community...)

Freehold DM wrote:
345. Calistran mites

Now these are super-interesting because they make me think of the behavior changes that toxyplasmowhatsis (that cat poop bacteria that makes rodents no longer fear cats) does to the brain, and also how it would be an advantage for the bugs if all their people hosts were constantly in close quarters or cuddling, so that they can more readily transfer between them to keep their breeding pool diverse and not limited to the bugs on any single person.

I like!


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347. Thresherbane Moth-bane Cicadas These incredibly inconsequential insects are annual appearances in most places. Remaining underground in larval and nymph form most of the year, they emerge to mate and feed for a month before becoming nearly non-existent for another year.

Subsisting primarily on tree sap and other innocuous plant material, these cicadas are mostly a harmless nuisance, with the males having a constant susurrating mating call throughout the day and early evening.

However, in areas prone to high activity of Thresherbane Moths, these cicadas are active constantly. Continually active throughout the year or the duration of the moths' presence. Consuming the tiny, microscopic insects supplements their diet of tree sap and makes the cicadas' mating cycles ramp up to truly irritating levels.

They flock and cling to areas with Thresherbane Moth concentrations, especially halfling villages and especially especially dirty halfling children. Though they aren't dangerous, their feeding can lead to rashes and the constant drone of cicada males trying to attract (and succeeding at attracting) mates is really distracting.

In addition, their predation of the Thresherbane Moths causes the moths to cease secreting the bacteria that keeps away Threshers in an effort to avoid detection. This naturally leads to the increased presence of Threshers in a locale, which thankfully is of no danger to most creatures, since any truly consequential creatures would be of a size too large to interest any Threshers, leaving only inconsequential things to be in trouble... like halfling children.

Thankfully, there's always Creeping Maiden, a plant used to create a salve for smearing upon dirty, inconsequential halfling children.

Unfortunately, there's also... Inconsequential Fauna #348. A mite that's attracted to the scent of garlic and lavender. Normally an annoyance for certain perfume and scented oil users (or garlic enthusiasts) but they become truly pervasive in the presence of both scents.

348. Creeping Maiden Mites These tiny mites are normally harmless to animals, living on leaves and tiny rodents. They do have a predilection for feeding on garlic roots and major infestations can cause some minor crop disruption, though it's typically just discolored or wilted leaves and shriveled bulbs.

In the presence of Creeping Maiden, these mites infest nearby creatures. Their nearly imperceptible size makes such infestations unnoticeable, though it causes such creatures to be more attracted to the scent of lavender and the taste of garlic. Most notably, infested non-halfling creatures find halfling children atrociously uncute and intolerable. Infested halfling children just get chubbier. Not the cute chubby.


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Nature is brutal.

It seems there is an inconsequential parasite for nearly every type or species of inconsequential flora and fauna.

349. Arcanus-sunacra

Arcanus-sunacra is a mysterious virophage that is incapable of infestation or replication on its own... it finds its way into a host often riding on larger viruses with more robust infiltration mechanisms and replication factories. The reliance on larger viruses for both transportation and reproduction has made it impossible to keep any living populations of Arcanus-sunacra in captivity. As such, there is very little research into the specific details or "habits" of Arcanus-sunacra.

Arcanus-sunacra would be highly valued, and extensively studied if even a fraction of the population became aware of its benefits... for, you see, Arcanus-sunacra is capable of (possibly even responsible for) filling its host with aracne energies. The accumulation of Arcanus-sunacra builds an equal abundance of this energy. Most arcane spellcasters are host to Arcanus-sunacra without even knowing it.

It is not known if Arcanus-sunacra is attracted to hosts already possessing reservoirs of arcane energy, or if Arcanus-sunacra is responsible for their hosts' arcane abilities. Many people will live their entire lives never knowing they harbor Arcanus-sunacra, although some develop minor Spell-Like Abilities that are often acredited to their race, rather than the virus.

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