Pan,
He might be wrong about the date, but I'm positive he's talking about the first movie.
The second one had Falazure and you know that made it better. *pauses* Okay it made it better for me but still!
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Dungeons & Dragons (2010)
I feel bad for the actors who were actually trying to do their job, overshadowed by the hammy overacting of the others (Snails, Profion, Damodar).
Also the terrible, terrible dialogue. "Okay, old elf dude actor who used to be a Dr. Who, you need to explain the connection between dragons and magic very, very slowly. And repeat yourself a lot. Use. Dramatic... Pauses, for things that aren't particularly dramatic." "Okay young actress playing a prodigiously intelligent wizard, you need to repeat everything old elf dude says very slowly, with confusion and wonder in your voice, like you are a developmentally disabled child learning to speak Mesopotamian."
Set,
When was Jeffery Irons a Time Lord?
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Set,
When was Jeffery Irons a Time Lord?
I was referring to Tom Baker, who played the old elf dude who told Marina of the connection between dragons and magic, not Jeremy Irons, who ate all the scenery as Profion, and if it were not for Snails and Damodar *also* sucking spectacularly, I would say single-handedly ruined the movie.
Set,
Oh right! *Forgot Tom Baker showed up in this* Thanks for reminding me.
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Crank & Crank 2: High Voltage
(You have to watch them both to experience the full saga that is Crank)
Why it's bad: Jason Statham plays his usual "I'm a badass" character in a world that flips the bird to things like layered characters, complex storytelling, and physics.
Why I like it: It's the Grand Theft Auto/Saints Row video game adaptation that you never knew you always needed. It's Jason Statham being bat-poo insane for 90 minutes. Especially Crank 2, holy beans. My friends and I also like to pretend that it's actually a documentary camera crew just following Statham around while he's between jobs.
Also, it features one of the best cellphone ringtones ever. I've had it as my ringtone for years.
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47 Ronin
First time I watched it, it seemed really cheesy. But, after watching it a few more times, it grows on you. Has great use of Asian lore. Great inspiration for samurai characters. Keanu Reeves actually does a fantastic job, pre-John Wick.
Rknop,
I checked. You most definitely got the date wrong.
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Just watched this one -- From Hell It Came. Classic cheesy 50's SF film about a radioactive killer zombie tree monster named Tabonga lumbering around a South Seas island bumping off its enemies.
The Bad: 'Scientists' who sound like nincompoops and say incredibly cringeworthy things about the locals. 'Natives' whose acting is more wooden than the tree monster. A female love interest scientist who is a screaming ditz. A drunken horny comedy relief character with the fakest Liverpool accent you'll ever hear.
The monster Tabonga can't bend over, move faster than a slow walk, or climb, yet he gets out of pits and chases people down (aided by their literally walking right into him). Worst of all, it takes almost an hour out of a 71 minute movie to get to the monster action!
The Good: All those strikes against it and it's still better than most anything you'll see in a SyFy original movie.
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The Brain From Planet Auros (1957)
The Bad: An evil disembodied brain creature from the Planet Auros named Gor comes to Earth and possesses the body of a young scientist, promptly goes on a murder spree, and uses his SPACE BRAIN POWERS to try to to destroy the city. A good disembodied brain creature from Planet Auros has chased Gor across the stars and possesses the body of a dog to try to stop Gor. Why a dog? SCIENCE!! Wooden acting, laughable special effects, and for being a giant disembodied brain, Gor's master plan is really, really dumb.
The Good B-movie 1950s sci-fi hijinks. And the climactic fight scene looks like the hero is fighting a giant piñata... because the actor is fighting a giant piñata.
Brain from Planet Arous? Man I love that film, it's so gloriously stupid. Probably my favorite 'evil brain' move after the classic Fiend Without A Face; it took me such a long time to figure out those two films were the inspiration for the intellect devourer.
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Does "Earnest Scared Stupid," "Earnest Goes to Jail" et. al. count as terrible? I like them. They're really stupid though.
If they count, then I'm right there with you.
I can still recite almost the entire script for Ernest Saves Christmas verbatim.
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Does "Earnest Scared Stupid," "Earnest Goes to Jail" et. al. count as terrible? I like them. They're really stupid though.If they count, then I'm right there with you.
I can still recite almost the entire script for Ernest Saves Christmas verbatim.
I remember laughing at those quite a bit. Having grown up with the Earnest show, and the movies, it's so bizarre for me when I see Jim Varney in any other role.