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1. All bards must speak in the third person.
2. Ba-Dum Ba-Dum-Dum must play whenever the party starts fighting pugwampis.
3. The first player to propose going underwater to pursue the kraken must be splashed in the face with soda.
4. The first player to propose splitting up must be split up with a broadsword.
5. All PCs whose players are not paying attention to the battle are considered to be flat-footed.
6. Players playing master summoners have six seconds to declare and roll for their actions each turn.
7. If a player is found using a loaded die, they have that replaced with the "Cheater's D20", which is a d6.
8. Paladin players must bring the snacks, and clean up, and pay for everything. Because the GM is looking for an excuse, pal.
11. All goblin enemies must have the Roll With It feat.
13.) An Int score of 2 is a requirement to take levels in Fighter.
14.) Dragon's can, at any time, forget that they know how to fly.
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15. Any character may, at any time, attempt 3 consecutive DC 30 Will saves as a full-round action - if they fail the first of these saves, they take 1d4 points of ability damage to their highest ability score; if they make the first but fail the second, they take 1d8 points of ability damage to that score; if they make the first and second but fail the third, they take 1d8 points of ability damage to all their ability scores; if they succeed at all three saves, they gain one free wish.
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16a.) Except for the ones named Wash Georgington.
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18.) The first Tuesday of every month is Tact Tuesday. Anyone who fails to comply will be exiled via catapult.
19.) The exiling catapult must be kept in working condition at all time. You never know when we need to use it.
20.) Those who attempt to subvert the proper numerical order will be exiled via catapult.
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If two PCs have the same result for initiative, the players must have a dance off to determine who goes first.
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23. Any player that shows up without their own dice will be subject to the results of rolls made by the other players.
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27.) In order to play a dwarf, you must be able to chug an entire bottle of liquor and not die, or work as an actual miner.
28.) You cannot declare that the GM's cat is now your familiar.
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29. In order to play a Halfling, you must be either overweight or underheight.
30. If at least three-quarters of the people at the table (speaking honestly and objectively) agree that you have 16s or higher in at least 2 of your real-life ability scores (a consensus on exactly which abilities they are in is unnecessary), you may play a Pureblooded Azlanti.
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32. All characters must put ranks in either Perform (Irish Jig), Profession (Sewerworker) or Craft (Pasta) every level or take a -2 penalty to constitution.
33. In order to play a Skald, a player must bring a tuba and the entire collected works of Shakespeare as gifts to the DM.
34. When entering a room, a player must roll a will save or attempt to seduce nearest inanimate object or ooze.
40.) Those who double, triple, and quadruple post will be exiled via catapult.
41.) Quintuple posting is okay.
46.) Vampire peasants must work on farms like every other peasant.
47.) To play an oracle, you must successfully predict at least 3 different events with perfect accuracy (including precise times, what everyone involved is wearing down to the thread count, etc.).
48.) Licking loot does not make it yours by default.
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50: W:tA players may only play characters of the Lupus breed if they can demonstrate the ability to clean their nether-portions with their tongue.
51: Other players are encouraged to record such demonstrations for posterity/sale/blackmail.
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52b.) Half-Chupacabra Fiends are an acceptable substitute.
53.) Your cleric can worship the internet only if their race is LOLcatfolk.
54.) If you want to play a gunslinger, you must demonstrate that you have mastered playing a harmonica.
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55.) You have to play a magic pony if you post as one on Twitter.
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58. Anytime anyone rolls an Acrobatics check they have to yell 'Parkour!'
60.) 58 is not 59.
61.) Anyone who wishes to play a necromancer must also be a certified Witch Doctor.
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64. Any new player who shows up to their first game wearing a top hat gets a free +1 to their choice of mental ability score for their first character.
65. Players with one or more gold teeth start the game with an extra 20d100 gold pieces.
66. Players who are/were in the military and think that that automatically makes them hot s*~# suffer a -1 penalty to all attack and damage rolls. You want someone to lick your ass for that, go talk to a politician.
67. Spellcraft checks to identify spells cast by "Oriental" characters are 10 higher due to bad dubbing.
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70. Any new player who wears a propeller beanie to their first game gets a box of Lunchables, a pat on the shoulder, and the DM's heartfelt pity.
71. Giant spiders and scorpions are to be represented on the combat grid by actual, normal-sized, live spiders and scorpions.
72. In order to play a Binder, you must first have a lengthy discussion about your intended character and Pact Magic in general with your DM...within earshot of one or more conservative Christians.
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73. Bringing a pony figure to the game only qualifies you to play a pony character. Just because you brought a Twilly figure doesn't make you an alicorn, unless you are the GM.
74. Insufficient bribes won't count for any XP, but the GM will still take the offered sacrifices anyway.
75.) Any diviner wizard who can demonstrate a skill in tarot card reading may prepare 1 extra spell of each level.
76.) Prestidigitation is not a substitute for good hygiene. I'm talking to you Larry!