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A subtle hum builds steadily before drowning out all sounds. Even the steady whir of the airship and the pulsing roar of Jacob's sphere of energy are drowned out as a monolithic figure obscures a point on the horizon.
PCs, adventurers, NPCs, and aliases alike scramble frantically to be at their stations for the battle that begins, of course, right after the Big-Bad-Evil-Guy finishes his monologue in this post.
A vile green glow suffuses the landscape as the monster's eye finally opens. As the creature continues its approach, drawing to the full height of a colossal sized creature, the droning hum is broken by an earthshaking cackle and the opening bars of techno music. "WrOnG TrAcK, fOoLiSh MoRTaL..." Sorry, the opening overtures of a climactic-boss-fight orchestral piece.
Woah, dude, that's huge! Like, 64 feet tall, at least! I'm glad I bought some extra teddy bears to act as decoys, man.
*Seeing how close the dread beast is to completion, screams loudly and steps upward into the sphere of blazing blue flame. His final words echoing against the crags and ridges of the blasted place the superstar forums have become, and sounding a clarion call in the face of the dread 9.*
*A flash of light so bright it is felt rather than seen rips night into day for one brilliant second. Leaving the now completed Fusion God Level 4 Forum Spirit Bomb hanging in the air, emitting the comforting warmth of hearth light to guide you home in the darkest of nights*
Who will take up the power Jacob 9001 has bought so dearly?
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I am here to defend the honor of the Nine! We shall never be...
<looks at updated tags>
Sigh. I guess we always were doomed to die...
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Glides lazily several hundred feet in the sky above Season 9 before dive bombing it. Coming just shy of 35 feet, he caws loudly, "Power Word Blind!" Nothing happens though as the bird swiftly realizes the health point requirements of the spell. In light of its folly, it does not get far before a cluster of black arrows sprout from its neck, sending it spiraling to the ground where it dies of falling damage.
Looks at his fellows and sees that all have rolled a poorer initiative than he did. He then draws his blades and charges forward in a manner like a cross between that Mel Gibson flick "Braveheart" and that one scene in the Narnia movie. In any case it looks friggin' sweet.
It is much to his misfortune though that Captain McBadAss is just a regular human commoner suffering from delusions of grandeur. The enemy pays him little enough mind, even letting him through their ranks at the feet of the monster because they are scummy metagamers, only to giggle as he is instantly killed after being stepped on by Season 9.
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No, this can't be! Season 9 is too powerful! Quick, adventurers, let me bleed on your magic items and grant them strength!
I'm giving her all I got cap'n
"Aye Scotty; alright, all hands on gunnery! Ready tha' starboard bombards! I want the reloadin' double crewed! Four shots a minute, that's an order! This landlubbin' sack o' scurvy is going to be full o' lead by the time we be done here. "
I think my canon was aimed the wrong way. We probably should have gotten some training. Giant holes are good for boats, right?
Star Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Star Voter Season 9
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*Darklord Morius straps on his forehead a Japanese headband*
この容器はナルニアのクローゼットに鍛造、純粋valirianのミスリルで作られています！それはすべてを破壊することができます。あなたのすべては、大声で 叫びます！神の風！神の風！神の風！
<This vessel is forged from the closet of Narnia, it is made of pure Valirian Mithril! It will be able to destroy all. All of you, cry out loud! God of wind! God of wind! God of wind!>
*Hurls his airship against Season 9*
The entire Golarion pantheon materialize behind the little imp known as Template Fu who places hands on hips, strikes a superma..imp pose...
"Cower before the might of my friends. Go sic' em!"
And with that, the terrors of Season 9 were vanquished and they shrank to an itty-bitty size to be stored in a cosmically powered jar... on the shelf next to the previous 8.
The gods departed with their prize, leaving behind a golden message in the calm night sky in their wake...
"Tomorrow, we shall the lands new heroes who must fight until there is only one!"
;)
<disclaimer> apologies to the Genie of the Lamp, Superman and Highlander for this complete rip off! :P</disclaimer>
Having taken careful aim over the course of multiple cinematic montages, she takes her shots, firing one bomb that drops hundreds of portable holes on the target, and a second one that magically launches items that function like bags of holding through the placed holes.
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Watches afk while his entourage carefully makes knowledge checks and other tactical decisions. This preparation is cut short has suddenly Leroy screams,
He charges forth, drawing aggro from the beast and curses from his team as he rapidly mashes his keyboard to activate all of his buffs. Like Captain McBadAss before him, he and his entourage are duly slaughtered by the horde at the feet of Season 9.
"At least...I got...chicken..."
Looks dumbfounded at Bahbrahb who is slowly sinking his own ship by a combination of self-inflicted cannon fire and viciously ramming his vessel into the numerous plot holes of this story. Shaking his head he casts Salvage on the vessel, if only to be able to say that he contributed to the fight somehow besides asking people for help.