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You forget that all the above needs to be done by a Supervillian with a British accent named Francis.


Hunt, the PugWumpus wrote:
{climbs down off roof, shuffles in wearing tin-foil suit making squish-squish footstep noises} Traumatic harpoon accident + vegemite... nothing. I doused myself in crime-lab chemicals and waited all night for a lightning strike... nothing. This getting superpowers thing is turning out to be much more difficult than comics and movies have led me to believe.

Have you tried Gamma Radiation? Or Radioactive Spider bites?


Or swallowing an Infinity Stone?


Cosmic Energy?

Have radioactive waste splashed into your Eyes?

Getting a blood transfusion from a mongoose?


Selene Spires wrote:

Cosmic Energy?

Have radioactive waste splashed into your Eyes?

Getting a blood transfusion from a mongoose?

That last one is tricky...mongooses and pugwampi don't get along all that well...comes from a misunderstanding some years ago...rather politically complex to tell the truth...


All you have to do is tell it you bit by a cobra....it will almost always help...and you get super speed.


Or smoke some magic mushrooms to unlock your psychic (psycho?) powers.


OR BEING BORN A GOBLIN?!


Hunt, the PugWumpus wrote:
{climbs down off roof, shuffles in wearing tin-foil suit making squish-squish footstep noises} Traumatic harpoon accident + vegemite... nothing. I doused myself in crime-lab chemicals and waited all night for a lightning strike... nothing. This getting superpowers thing is turning out to be much more difficult than comics and movies have led me to believe.

Have you tried eating BEANS?


Selene Spires wrote:
All you have to do is tell it you bit by a cobra....it will almost always help...and you get super speed.

Bitten by a cobra, while being struck by lightning, the instant before certain death.


I have a good way but its really complicated you need a familiar the assume form power. you need to be a master of many forms. Actually Probably be better if you just google it.

Edit: Oh but you do need to be some sort of reptilian race.


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Wow, so many many wonderful ideas. <sniff> I'm touched that you all care so much.

Unfortunately, gamma radiation is hard to come by, and microwaving spiders to make them radioactive only seems to ruin the microwave (and the spiders). I'm too fat plump pudgy big-boned well-marbled, er, the microwave is too small for any 'wampi to fit in (although I'd like to thank MP's offer to use a large hammer to mush me in).

So, I've gotta improvise. {starts duct-taping luminescent watches & smoke detectors to self} Once I'm done with this, I'm gonna chug a couple barium milkshakes and climb into the neighbor's radar dish to bake in the radioactive goodness.


3 people marked this as a favorite.
Hunt, the PugWumpus wrote:

Wow, so many many wonderful ideas. <sniff> I'm touched that you all care so much.

Unfortunately, gamma radiation is hard to come by, and microwaving spiders to make them radioactive only seems to ruin the microwave (and the spiders). I'm too fat plump pudgy big-boned well-marbled, er, the microwave is too small for any 'wampi to fit in (although I'd like to thank MP's offer to use a large hammer to mush me in).

So, I've gotta improvise. {starts duct-taping luminescent watches & smoke detectors to self} Once I'm done with this, I'm gonna chug a couple barium milkshakes and climb into the neighbor's radar dish to bake in the radioactive goodness.

You're welcome about the hammer; any time!

As for your dissertation that no 'wampi can fit in a microwave, I believe you are wrong!

*opens door to microwave and helps Bartholmew pugwampi in, shuts the door and turns it on*

See! No problems at...

*large sizzle and splat noise*

...erm...that might not be the best way to get powers though. I...got to be...somewhere...

<.<

>.>

*flees thread*


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I had to share this. Playing PF tonight. Party is camping. Watch 2, the watcher hears a creature approaching. A few random guesses are made (before any visual descriptions, etc.). I said "Aurumvorax" and the GM stops dead, looks at me and is like "how did you?"

Guess what it was?

Totally lucky guess. We all had a good laugh.


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GreenDragon1133 wrote:

I had to share this. Playing PF tonight. Party is camping. Watch 2, the watcher hears a creature approaching. A few random guesses are made (before any visual descriptions, etc.). I said "Aurumvorax" and the GM stops dead, looks at me and is like "how did you?"

Guess what it was?

Totally lucky guess. We all had a good laugh.

My DM hates it when I do that.


2 people marked this as a favorite.

Huh, it looks as if Rysky has abandoned this thread for the Playtest messageboards. Which means we have the opportunity to rule this place and refashion it as we see fit!!!!

HUZZAH!!!

*murmurs to himself while getting out the measuring tape and a pencil*

I wonder if we can convert the caramelization cauldron into a hot tub?


2 people marked this as a favorite.

My Mistress will be back!


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Selene Spires wrote:
My Mistress will be back!

Nah-hunh! :p

*begins studying drape swatches*


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I am sure she will 'reward' those who deserve it and 'punish' those who desire it upon her return.


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{stumbles back in, beet red from sunburn} All that radiation might have had an effect... I feel lobster-y.

{spots Selene} Uh oh, that means deadly hunter Floyd might be lurking about. {attempts to hide (Stealth 1d20 + 0 + 2 ⇒ (8) + 0 + 2 = 10) behind lamp}


Wise move..Floyd has alot of doggy related stress to take out of poor little creatures.


{forgets he is supposed to be quietly hiding} Poor Dave O'Wampi. Floyd batted him around for 15 minutes straight before smacking him under the fridge... and Dave was never seen again.


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That is because under the fridge is a beautiful magical land of music, stars and happieness.


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{sings}Un-der the fridge!


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CAN'T HAVE THAT! CREW! DESTROY THIS 'UNDER THE FRIDGE' PLACE!


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Captain Killjoy wrote:
CAN'T HAVE THAT! CREW! DESTROY THIS 'UNDER THE FRIDGE' PLACE!

If you could use a flamethrower to clean that place out, that would be great. There has been a funky smell coming out from 'under the fridge' ever since Dave O'wampi went missing.


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Maybe don't throw Dave's corpse out? I think Mistress probably has an undead maid scroll around here somewhere. Maid Dave won't get tired or cranky, so he can do all MP's and my chores and housework. Plus, Mistress can dress him up in little doll and kawaii outfits (which means MP and I don't have to wear them)... it's win-win for everyone.


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... CREW, IF YOU FIND A GREMLIN CORPSE DOWN THERE, EAT IT!

Can't have the pugwampis benefiting...


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Captain Killjoy wrote:

... CREW, IF YOU FIND A GREMLIN CORPSE DOWN THERE, EAT IT!

Can't have the pugwampis benefiting...

I have a large jar of honey garlic pickles to trade for the corpse if it comes out intact.

Hmmm, Hunt should we go with a mini-fridge from now on to avoid these unpleasant situations or stick with classic harvest gold full-sized fridge?


Captain Killjoy wrote:
CAN'T HAVE THAT! CREW! DESTROY THIS 'UNDER THE FRIDGE' PLACE!

I am not worried as you have to be able to read to enter 'Under the Refrigerator' to bring weapons in....they have great security.


That's what that lunatic Wilkins is for...


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{reappears excitedly} I found Mistress's scroll pouch! OK Dave, take this! {casts scroll from spell... which causes backlash}

ARGH! {falls over, still smoldering, whimpers feebly:} Medic?


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Meanwhile, the fridge shakes, then lurches as something crawls out from under it, scattering a previously-hidden horde of now necromantically-infused cat toys...


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Mrgh?


Hunt, the PugWumpus wrote:

{reappears excitedly} I found Mistress's scroll pouch! OK Dave, take this! {casts scroll from spell... which causes backlash}

ARGH! {falls over, still smoldering, whimpers feebly:} Medic?

Yarr! It be a talkin' blue cannonball, or perhaps I've been dippin' into me private stock of anaesthetics again.

AHOY THERE MATEE, WHAT SEEMS TO BE THE TROUBLE?


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Hunt, the PugWumpus wrote:

{reappears excitedly} I found Mistress's scroll pouch! OK Dave, take this! {casts scroll from spell... which causes backlash}

ARGH! {falls over, still smoldering, whimpers feebly:} Medic?

*sighs then applies the bactine*

You really out to be more careful. Half our budget is now on antibiotics and topical ointments.

Undead Pugwampi Maid wrote:
Mrgh?

Oh, hi Dave!

Dr Pirate wrote:

Yarr! It be a talkin' blue cannonball, or perhaps I've been dippin' into me private stock of anaesthetics again.

AHOY THERE MATEE, WHAT SEEMS TO BE THE TROUBLE?

Oh thanks for the offer of help, but it's just your average Gremlin-using-powers-beyond-his-capability-to-create-an-undead-abomination accident.

Same-old, same-old.


Question: what if we have no question to ask?


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Master Pugwampi wrote:
Oh thanks for the offer of help, but it's just your average Gremlin-using-powers-beyond-his-capability-to-create-an-undead-abomination accident.

{feebly, from reclined position:} Right. Just a typical Monday. ... Wait, I thought it was Wednesday. Monday, huh. Well, that explains the arcane backlash.

Silver Crusade

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Pathfinder Adventure, Adventure Path, Companion, Lost Omens, Rulebook, Starfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Roleplaying Game, Starfinder Society Subscriber
Master Pugwampi wrote:

Huh, it looks as if Rysky has abandoned this thread for the Playtest messageboards. Which means we have the opportunity to rule this place and refashion it as we see fit!!!!

HUZZAH!!!

*murmurs to himself while getting out the measuring tape and a pencil*

I wonder if we can convert the caramelization cauldron into a hot tub?

It’s like getting caught in a Black Tentacles spell.

Also, tomatoe/tomato. *shoves Wumpus in*

Silver Crusade

Pathfinder Adventure, Adventure Path, Companion, Lost Omens, Rulebook, Starfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Roleplaying Game, Starfinder Society Subscriber
Selene Spires wrote:
My Mistress will be back!

You would be correct!

*hugs*

Silver Crusade

1 person marked this as a favorite.
Pathfinder Adventure, Adventure Path, Companion, Lost Omens, Rulebook, Starfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Roleplaying Game, Starfinder Society Subscriber
Tacticslion wrote:
Question: what if we have no question to ask?

That was a question so you’re obviously lying.

Silver Crusade

1 person marked this as a favorite.
Pathfinder Adventure, Adventure Path, Companion, Lost Omens, Rulebook, Starfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Roleplaying Game, Starfinder Society Subscriber
Hunt, the PugWumpus wrote:
Master Pugwampi wrote:
Oh thanks for the offer of help, but it's just your average Gremlin-using-powers-beyond-his-capability-to-create-an-undead-abomination accident.
{feebly, from reclined position:} Right. Just a typical Monday. ... Wait, I thought it was Wednesday. Monday, huh. Well, that explains the arcane backlash.

*headpats*


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Rysky wrote:
Master Pugwampi wrote:

Huh, it looks as if Rysky has abandoned this thread for the Playtest messageboards. Which means we have the opportunity to rule this place and refashion it as we see fit!!!!

HUZZAH!!!

*murmurs to himself while getting out the measuring tape and a pencil*

I wonder if we can convert the caramelization cauldron into a hot tub?

It’s like getting caught in a Black Tentacles spell.

Also, tomatoe/tomato. *shoves Wumpus in*

*muffled from the cauldron*

Good to see you, boss! How have you been?


Rysky wrote:
Tacticslion wrote:
Question: what if we have no question to ask?
That was a question so you’re obviously lying.

Hah! You've been snipped by your own clips, nicked by your own cops, tricked by your own trap, trapped by your own trick! I never said that I had no question - I only asked a hypothetical! Ha-HAH!

(See?)
^Is also a question.

Silver Crusade

Pathfinder Adventure, Adventure Path, Companion, Lost Omens, Rulebook, Starfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Roleplaying Game, Starfinder Society Subscriber
Master Pugwampi wrote:
Rysky wrote:
Master Pugwampi wrote:

Huh, it looks as if Rysky has abandoned this thread for the Playtest messageboards. Which means we have the opportunity to rule this place and refashion it as we see fit!!!!

HUZZAH!!!

*murmurs to himself while getting out the measuring tape and a pencil*

I wonder if we can convert the caramelization cauldron into a hot tub?

It’s like getting caught in a Black Tentacles spell.

Also, tomatoe/tomato. *shoves Wumpus in*

*muffled from the cauldron*

Good to see you, boss! How have you been?

Good to see you too Wumpums :3

Eh, meh *shrugs* You?

Silver Crusade

1 person marked this as a favorite.
Pathfinder Adventure, Adventure Path, Companion, Lost Omens, Rulebook, Starfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Roleplaying Game, Starfinder Society Subscriber
Tacticslion wrote:
Rysky wrote:
Tacticslion wrote:
Question: what if we have no question to ask?
That was a question so you’re obviously lying.

Hah! You've been snipped by your own clips, nicked by your own cops, tricked by your own trap, trapped by your own trick! I never said that I had no question - I only asked a hypothetical! Ha-HAH!

(See?)
^Is also a question.

*pats head*


Rysky wrote:
Master Pugwampi wrote:
Rysky wrote:
Master Pugwampi wrote:

Huh, it looks as if Rysky has abandoned this thread for the Playtest messageboards. Which means we have the opportunity to rule this place and refashion it as we see fit!!!!

HUZZAH!!!

*murmurs to himself while getting out the measuring tape and a pencil*

I wonder if we can convert the caramelization cauldron into a hot tub?

It’s like getting caught in a Black Tentacles spell.

Also, tomatoe/tomato. *shoves Wumpus in*

*muffled from the cauldron*

Good to see you, boss! How have you been?

Good to see you too Wumpums :3

Eh, meh *shrugs* You?

I'm fine, but the lump that I am the surly part of has just come down with the flu. Bleah!


2 people marked this as a favorite.
Rysky wrote:
Selene Spires wrote:
My Mistress will be back!

You would be correct!

*hugs*

Yeah!!!

Mistress is back!!!

Silver Crusade

1 person marked this as a favorite.
Pathfinder Adventure, Adventure Path, Companion, Lost Omens, Rulebook, Starfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Roleplaying Game, Starfinder Society Subscriber
Selene Spires wrote:
Rysky wrote:
Selene Spires wrote:
My Mistress will be back!

You would be correct!

*hugs*

Yeah!!!

Mistress is back!!!

Ye!

*hugs and kisses the head ouchie*

Silver Crusade

2 people marked this as a favorite.
Pathfinder Adventure, Adventure Path, Companion, Lost Omens, Rulebook, Starfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Roleplaying Game, Starfinder Society Subscriber
Master Pugwampi wrote:
Rysky wrote:
Master Pugwampi wrote:
Rysky wrote:
Master Pugwampi wrote:

Huh, it looks as if Rysky has abandoned this thread for the Playtest messageboards. Which means we have the opportunity to rule this place and refashion it as we see fit!!!!

HUZZAH!!!

*murmurs to himself while getting out the measuring tape and a pencil*

I wonder if we can convert the caramelization cauldron into a hot tub?

It’s like getting caught in a Black Tentacles spell.

Also, tomatoe/tomato. *shoves Wumpus in*

*muffled from the cauldron*

Good to see you, boss! How have you been?

Good to see you too Wumpums :3

Eh, meh *shrugs* You?

I'm fine, but the lump that I am the surly part of has just come down with the flu. Bleah!

*tucks into heavy blanket burrito*

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