Awesome Parenting Moments


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I am amazed no thread like this exists yet.

So, in 2012, after 4.5 years of living with my mother after my father died (I strongly recommend against such behavior, and stay away from my mother, you!), we finally moved back into our beloved 900-square-foot shanty, bad roof, bad foundation, and all.

I had set aside $10,000 for home improvements when we moved in. There was utterly no question as to what we were going to do with it: We bought a brand-spanking-new Thermador 36" gas oven and range, complete with hood. Perhaps the most telling part of this purchase was that we could afford to have it installed, but couldn't afford to actually fix the wall once they'd put it in, but we were fine with that. So we have a gorgeous, $7000 oven sitting on a bare plywood floor with unfinished drywall behind it. Priorities, people!

Anyway, on to the parenting story.

My 13-year-old wanted a pot pie this morning. The instructions say to put it on a "baking sheet". He chose a plastic cutting board as his "baking sheet".

Of COURSE he put it on the top rack, so my $7000+ oven is now filled with melted, solidified plastic.
He was so distraught over the event I was concerned that he was going to harm himself.

I just pointed out what I'd told him many times before when he made silly mistakes on his math homework.

"We, as humans, learn through our mistakes. If we never make mistakes, we never learn. Yes, you really screwed up our oven. It will take me 2-3 hours of hard labor to get that plastic off. But no one died. You filled the house with fumes, but we managed to air out the house before anyone was seriously hurt by them. So you've learned a valuable lesson, and you've done no permanent harm. Congratulations on being human, learn from it, and if you ever do something like that again you're buying me a new oven!"

Fortunately, it cheered him up immensely.

Unfortunately, I now get to clean solidified plastic out of a $7000 oven.

*SIGH*


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when my daughter was in first grade she got in trouble at school for pushing around a bully that was picking on a kindergartner, at the end of the day when her teacher was telling me about it she looked like she was going to physically ill, so we get outside and she asked, hesitantly "am i in big trouble then?" i just laughed and said "No! you did the right thing, good for you!"

also this summer our three year old dropped a dollar plus in various denominations into the disc slot of our year old computer, then put in a disc! luckily they covered it on the warranty, i also got him a bank to put money in on the way home:-)

i hope the oven turns out okay, good for you for handling it with grace:)

also when i was ten or eleven i caulked our brand new refrigerator shut, my mom didn't freak out, just gave me a little emoticon smile and said "i hope you can get it off by supper time"
I did:-)


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Oh, don't get me started on bullies.

Our older son is, as I proudly put is, "A Force of Nature". And the capitals are necessary.
He is grossly under-sized. At 13 years old he's all of 52" tall and 69 pounds. But he has the strength, balance, and flexibility of a gymnast, and the attitude of a 16-year-old goth girl. "You have a problem with that? Wow! Sucks to be you!"

So a bunch of girls were picking on my 10-year-old, calling him fat and slow and clumsy and telling him they could do everything better than him. He came home from the park near tears, talking about how useless he was. All I had to say was, "Go get 'em, Impus Major!"

My older son proceeded to pretend to be the YOUNGER brother (easy, since he's smaller), and asked them what they were trying to do.

Imagine a poor 10-year-old girl trying to compete with a 13-year-old male gymnast in a series of physical competitions.

Not to be sexist, but yeah, it was THAT bad. Of course, in the events they chose (Tree climbing, balance beam, monkey bars) I think he would have kicked the crap out of anyone other than a fellow gymnast. I sure as heck couldn't have kept up!

The group left the park with a couple of them near tears. My younger son felt worlds better.

I'm afraid my 13-year-old got a steak dinner for his efforts.

Am I a terrible person?


Kids at my daughter's school haven't played Tag with her since third grade, nobody at that school can catch her! she also climbs everything! even the walls in our house, also due to her summers at the farm and helping me landscape she is one of the strongest:-)

also girls don't have a middle ground they are either A) super nice and helpful or B) mean, a bit spiteful, and vindictive
luckily mine is A:)

edit: lol also our older kids sound a lot alike, except my daughter goes more for the Archer or It's Always Sunny style quips:-)


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Last week my 7 and 6 yo daughters told me they like X-Men movies more than Barbie movies.


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Nermal2097 wrote:
Last week my 7 and 6 yo daughters told me they like X-Men movies more than Barbie movies.

Congratulations!

My finest moment along those lines was when my wife got my (then) 9-year-old a knight costume complete with coif and crown, and he gleefully declared, "Hey, Dad! I'm King Arthur and you're that guy who carries around all his stuff!" (Pasty from Monty Python and the Holy Grail.)

So we rolled with it (complete with coconuts), and 1/3 of the people we met said, "Best... costumes... EVER!", while the other 2/3 asked, "Who the heck are you supposed to be?"

I was SO proud!


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My daughter's two favorite bands are Sleater-Kinney and Northern State her favorite movies are Napoleon Dynamite and Princess Bride and while her cousins have lightsaber battles quoting Star Wars she's using Family Guy Star Wars (which we both agree is better).

Awesome costume!
My kids spend the entirety of sptember and october putting together their costumes from scratch, and its never the same from year to year, this year they were a Catfolk Mummy Queen and a Wizard (which we literally threw together at the last second when he wanted to switch from his previous costume)

edit: actually the Wand i made myself five years ago, using the root of a Cherry Tree, i whittled and trimmed the root down using a rusty dull steak knife (which is all i had at the time) i also carved out a small hole in the end and was able to wedge a costume jewel into it, no glue, its still in there, i'm rather proud of it:)


Also after watching the new trailer for the next Pixar movie Inside Out i'll never be able to tell her to go to her room with a straight face again:P

Liberty's Edge

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Wow: I want to favorite every comment! I want to favorite this awesome thread!


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captain yesterday wrote:

Kids at my daughter's school haven't played Tag with her since third grade, nobody at that school can catch her! she also climbs everything! even the walls in our house, also due to her summers at the farm and helping me landscape she is one of the strongest:-)

also girls don't have a middle ground they are either A) super nice and helpful or B) mean, a bit spiteful, and vindictive
luckily mine is A:)

edit: lol also our older kids sound a lot alike, except my daughter goes more for the Archer or It's Always Sunny style quips:-)

I believe we already agreed in another thread that our spawn should never meet, lest they breed a tiny master race that enslaves us all with sarcasm.

Webstore Gninja Minion

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captain yesterday wrote:
also girls don't have a middle ground they are either A) super nice and helpful or B) mean, a bit spiteful, and vindictive

Comments like these really aren't helping the discussion any—please refrain from making blanket statements like this.


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My four year old daughter went as her favorite character from Star Wars, Darth Vader, for Halloween. When asked if she wanted to be a princess instead (by other people mind you) she said, "No thank you, I want to be Darth Vader".


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Mythic JMD031 wrote:
My four year old daughter went as her favorite character from Star Wars, Darth Vader, for Halloween. When asked if she wanted to be a princess instead (by other people mind you) she said, "No thank you, I want to be Darth Vader".

Woo hoo! Just friggin' woo hoo!

My 13-year-old son (did I mention he's TINY) found a sparkly blue Rainbow Dash tutu (from My Little Pony, for those who don't know) and body suit designed for 7-year-olds, then added rainbow leg warmers and a bloody unicorn head.

And went as something so terrifying that a 6th grader recently identified him as, "That creepy unicorn kid!"

(It was awesome -- some adults were asking, "But he's in a DRESS. Isn't that going to cause him issues?"
I just said, "No. It's Impus Major. He shall make it his own."
And he did!)


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Liz Courts wrote:
captain yesterday wrote:
also girls don't have a middle ground they are either A) super nice and helpful or B) mean, a bit spiteful, and vindictive
Comments like these really aren't helping the discussion any—please refrain from making blanket statements like this.

No one else seemed to find it a problem, nor was it meant to be, it was just what i've noticed at my my daughter's school, and don't get me started on how stupid, selfish and insensitive boys can act.....

i understand you live in Seattle but not everything is meant to offend or start a fight:)

edit: and also it was a joke, lighten up! its Christmas:-)


I see,
I forgot the smiley face and the rest of the joke, my bad:-)


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Awesome Grand-Parenting moment: My parents drove three and a half hours one way this week to see my daughter's 35 minute play, all because she sent an Email asking if they'd come, but she'd totally understand if they couldn't, it was really cool:-)

And kudos to her In-Town Uncles for emerging out of the house before noon to see it, excepting myself the rest of my family are night owls:)


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my three old son is sitting at the bookstore with a little girl he just met reading each other books, talking about what its like being 33(?) cute!


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captain yesterday wrote:
Liz Courts wrote:
captain yesterday wrote:
also girls don't have a middle ground they are either A) super nice and helpful or B) mean, a bit spiteful, and vindictive
Comments like these really aren't helping the discussion any—please refrain from making blanket statements like this.

No one else seemed to find it a problem, nor was it meant to be, it was just what i've noticed at my my daughter's school, and don't get me started on how stupid, selfish and insensitive boys can act.....

i understand you live in Seattle but not everything is meant to offend or start a fight:)

edit: and also it was a joke, lighten up! its Christmas:-)

You can't hide blatant sexism behind jokes or Christmas. That you think the statement isn't a big deal is even more telling than the statement itself.


Okaay?
1. You dont know me or my family, so please refrain from the insults:)
2. Keep the politics elsewhere, if you have a parenting story...
3. Merry Christmas:)


captain yesterday wrote:

Okaay?

1. You dont know me or my family, so please refrain from the insults:)
2. Keep the politics elsewhere, if you have a parenting story...
3. Merry Christmas:)

Calling a spade a spade isn't an insult or politics.


captain yesterday wrote:
Keep the politics elsewhere, if you have a parenting story...

As an aunt and a one-time 4-yro child, words from an adult can often have a powerful and lasting impact on how a child develops her (and his) sense of self and self-worth. Ill-/un-considered words doesn't mean the adult is a bad person, or sexist, but those words can still make their mark and be internalized by children.

I don't say this to cast blame upon your character or parenting skills--ain't nobody perfect.


I assure you you're both way off, i've done nothing but empower my daughter since before her birth.
please stay on topic:)


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Does heating up a blanket and wrapping my bearded dragon in it count as parenting? Or the fact that I named her Gargamel and her favorite food happens to be blueberries (aka smurfs)


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havoc xiii wrote:
Does heating up a blanket and wrapping my bearded dragon in it count as parenting? Or the fact that I named her Gargamel and her favorite food happens to be blueberries (aka smurfs)

I would argue that EVERYTHING is awesome parenting when it involves a dragon eating Smurfs. You just can't go wrong there...


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Aaack! What did you do to my beloved avatar! That is NOT awesome! I am SOOOO telling Gruumash!


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Smurfs are attacking!!! They must be blaming me for all their deaths I caused!!


is This the Coyote convention!
*sigh* Great!
Another wrong turn at Albuquerque!


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Steve Holt!


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I love christmas! its 6:20 and the kids are volunteering to put on pajamas:) no battle or misdirection:)


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This happened when i returned from Christmas foraging
I walk in the door
My Son (age 3.5): Daddy's home! Daddy's home! did you bring more presents?
Me: Nope, sorry just groceries
My Son: What the Heck! You really should've brought home more presents.......

perhaps i should forgo sleep until christmas morning...... :-p


I got my Wife

:
Reign of Stars, she really loves the pathfinder tales
surprisingly they are hard to find around our area (or at least they have been for a couple months) Her and the kids have been totally digging Iron Gods (my wife especially has been loving it, which has been really nice:-)

edit: obviously thats not all i got her, but thats the only pathfinder related item:)
edit 2: and suddenly we have an inch or two of Snow in the forecast for tomorrow :D


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Since 'tis the season and all that, have all you other parents faced the "Santa's Dilemma" blackmail moment from your kids?


  • Your kids realize that they want something stupid expensive for Christmas. In our case I believe it was a PlayStation 3.
  • Your kids know that you send a list to Santa every year, so they get together and each one of them puts one and only one item on the list: The aforementioned expensive item.
  • They conclusively state that since Santa has to give them SOMETHING, and since each one of them put one and only one thing on their list, they MUST be getting that thing.

Yeah, they got pajamas and a couple of games for their Nintendo DSes. But it was an interesting ploy... I was tempted to give them a PS3 game with a note, "Next year you'll get the game system on which to play this..."
...but I'm not quite *THAT* cruel.

EDIT: It also helps immensely to paraphrase Captain Barbosa. "Your Santa list is more of a guideline..."


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NobodysHome wrote:

Since 'tis the season and all that, have all you other parents faced the "Santa's Dilemma" blackmail moment from your kids?


  • Your kids realize that they want something stupid expensive for Christmas. In our case I believe it was a PlayStation 3.
  • Your kids know that you send a list to Santa every year, so they get together and each one of them puts one and only one item on the list: The aforementioned expensive item.
  • They conclusively state that since Santa has to give them SOMETHING, and since each one of them put one and only one thing on their list, they MUST be getting that thing.

Yeah, they got pajamas and a couple of games for their Nintendo DSes. But it was an interesting ploy... I was tempted to give them a PS3 game with a note, "Next year you'll get the game system on which to play this..."
...but I'm not quite *THAT* cruel.

They actually both gave me revised lists to send to Santa last week in fact, with a laptop (for her) and a bike (for him)

edit: i'm stealing the Barbossa line:)


Ambrosia Slaad wrote:
captain yesterday wrote:
Keep the politics elsewhere, if you have a parenting story...

As an aunt and a one-time 4-yro child, words from an adult can often have a powerful and lasting impact on how a child develops her (and his) sense of self and self-worth. Ill-/un-considered words doesn't mean the adult is a bad person, or sexist, but those words can still make their mark and be internalized by children.

I don't say this to cast blame upon your character or parenting skills--ain't nobody perfect.

He said it in the thread...doesn't mean he said it to the kids.


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OK. I just can't hold it in any more. I may end up locking my own thread as a result, but I've just gotta tirade.

The whole concept of, "Be careful of what you say in front of your kids" drives me to friggin' distraction. Guess what? You can either:

(a) Pursue your misguided belief that you can prevent your kids from ever hearing anything negative, and have them grow up basket cases when they encounter real people in the real world,

(b) Tilt at windmills trying to get the entire world population to never say anything disparaging,

(c) Teach your kids that sometimes, people are jerks.

By the time he was 3, Impus Major would listen to me, turn to my wife, and ask with big, earnest eyes, "Mom, is that a 'Dad lie'?"
He learned early on (and intentionally) that what people say has little bearing on reality. He has grown into one of the most enviously self-assured people I have ever known, and yet he is still filled with compassion and kindness. I'm pretty d**ned proud.

It is easily possible to go well off the deep end.

=====
CASE STUDY #1: My nephews

My sister-in-law fervently believes that children should never suffer any negative emotions, so she bends over backwards to 'protect' my nephews from ever hearing or feeling anything 'bad'. To them, the world is a safe, violence-free, electronics-free, news-free world. In what should be a surprise to no one, at 10 and 7 they are still both completely incapable of dealing with setbacks or negative emotions of any kind. The 10-year-old still throws crying, bang-your-head-on-the-floor-'til-the-adults-capitulate tantrums. My other brother lives in the same city with them, but stopped going to their house because his nephews were so "spoiled". He would rather fly 1000 miles to visit my kids than drive 10 minutes to visit my brother's. What does that say?

As for the kids themselves, they simply cannot tolerate the concept that they won't get their way. All the time. From everyone. I am looking at two kids who have never been allowed to use electronic devices. Who have never known what it is to want something but not get it. Who have never had to suffer through ANYTHING because their mother forbids it.

And I dread what they will grow into.

=====
CASE STUDY #2: Impus Major's best friend

My son's best friend is (was?) a 13-year-old girl. My interactions with her revealed a deep indoctrination into adamant feminism; any artistic depiction of an attractive female is 'blatant sexism'. Society 'treats women as second-class citizens'. Women should never have to deal with men who give any indication that they are attracted to them. Women should NEVER wear make-up, jewelry, or otherwise attempt to be attractive. Women who do so should be shunned for selling out their sex.

Her attitudes and arguments were FAR too adult for her emotional age (as perceived by me), and her opinions and discussions on other matters convinced me her attitudes were taught rather than her own. (Hopefully that makes sense to people who have had deep theoretical discussions with the under-12 crowd.)

So, being young, impressionable, and good-hearted, she abandoned her femininity. She now goes by a male name, does her utmost to look masculine, and insists that everyone calls her "him".

Her mother supported her, and now official school records show her name as masculine.

I have two issues with this:
(1) As far as my limited experience can tell me, she is NOT transgender. She is NOT a man trapped in a woman's body. She has instead been so indoctrinated into the notion that being a woman in U.S. society is an atrocious experience that she has decided to abandon her own sex rather than try to 'fight the power'. I have no idea what her future holds for her. When will she decide it's OK to be a woman again? If she never does, what will it mean for her happiness in life? I'm weird. I worry about such things for other people.

(2) While going through high school in the bay area as a transgender male would be hard, we're a pretty accepting lot. Unfortunately, that's not the path she's choosing. She's choosing to pretend to be male and to hope that no one notices. At 13, she can pull it off. The next few years are going to be hell for her. Not to trivialize the moment, but Mu Shu from Mulan comes to mind. "There are a couple of things they're bound to notice!"

So I'm not her dad, so there's not much I can do about it all. I'm supporting her. I'm giving her a welcoming gaming environment every Wednesday, using her male name, referring to her as a "him", and otherwise respecting her choices. I do my utmost to make my home a safe haven she can always come to, either to talk to me or my son, or just to hang out.

Inside, I weep for the pain the next few years will bring her.

=====
What the heck's my point? It's that being militant in any direction is detrimental to your kids. Let them experience life, guide them with answers to their questions, love them, support them, don't pretend that negativity doesn't exist in the world, but instead teach them to deal with that negativity, and they turn out OK.


I don't see what that has to do with defining 50% of the population as 1-dimensional binary options. Or what that has to do with people pointing out that defining 50% of the population as a 1-dimensional binary option makes someone kind-of a jerk.


Lol! Over the head it goes....


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captain yesterday wrote:

also girls don't have a middle ground they are either A) super nice and helpful or B) mean, a bit spiteful, and vindictive

Completely agree, I also believe boys don't have a middle ground either, they are always either A)drunken pirates who sail the world looking for booty or B) freedom fighting ninjas who spend all their time trying to overthrow the shogunate.

If you meet a boy who doesn't seem to fall into one of these two groups and so you disagree with me you can just keep your politics out of it, you don't know me or my family.

Also, smurf.


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Hey, what the? I'm not the angry smurf?! I'm the gently sarcastic one(is there one?) or smurfette maybe. Smurf life is so unfair!


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Ooooo. Now I am opening presents, nice!


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Also, I love my kids=)


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so is there a specific smurf code and how do I get it:)


ha! I get it now:D
smurf-tastic!


War does terrible things to a person, Smurf-y things


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Raising children is hard work, and I applaud any parent that does their best to give their kids a good life.

I have 3 daughters, they can be sweet, loud, complex, mean, wonderful, enthusiastic, sulky, amazing, annoying, thoughtful, selfish, helpful, aggressive, peacemakers all in the space one hour.

From what I have seen of my nephews, boys are very similar. The differences tend to be they are far more likely to jump off or climb up stuff.


The 8th Dwarf wrote:

Raising children is hard work, and I applaud any parent that does their best to give their kids a good life.

I have 3 daughters, they can be sweet, loud, complex, mean, wonderful, enthusiastic, sulky, amazing, annoying, thoughtful, selfish, helpful, aggressive, peacemakers all in the space one hour.

Thank you!

this is what i was trying to say in my first post, but my Dyslexic Sleep Deprived Mind wouldn't put it into proper words:)

Dark Archive

This was such a nice thread...


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captain yesterday wrote:
The 8th Dwarf wrote:

Raising children is hard work, and I applaud any parent that does their best to give their kids a good life.

I have 3 daughters, they can be sweet, loud, complex, mean, wonderful, enthusiastic, sulky, amazing, annoying, thoughtful, selfish, helpful, aggressive, peacemakers all in the space one hour.

Thank you!

this is what i was trying to say in my first post, but my Dyslexic Sleep Deprived Mind wouldn't put it into proper words:)

It's all good. As someone whom has typed out an ill considered sentence in the midst of a larger post myself on more than one occasion it would be silly of me to give you a hard time about it(well, beyond the basic gentle ribbing=p), have a good Christmas.

Indeed, everyone have a Good Christmas! (and if you don't celebrate Christmas, have a great holiday or regular day!!!)


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its a bit after 7am here, we were up until 12:30 making it look perfect and the dog and older one are patiently begging for their stockings:-)


Yuugasa wrote:
captain yesterday wrote:
The 8th Dwarf wrote:

Raising children is hard work, and I applaud any parent that does their best to give their kids a good life.

I have 3 daughters, they can be sweet, loud, complex, mean, wonderful, enthusiastic, sulky, amazing, annoying, thoughtful, selfish, helpful, aggressive, peacemakers all in the space one hour.

Thank you!

this is what i was trying to say in my first post, but my Dyslexic Sleep Deprived Mind wouldn't put it into proper words:)

well, beyond the basic gentle ribbing=p, have a good Christmas.

Indeed, everyone have a Good Christmas! (and if you don't celebrate Christmas, have a great holiday or regular day!!!)

Yep i assumed thats what you were going for=)

The nice thing about today is, with everything but Perkins closed, Traffic nonexistent, The Lake frozen close to shore and everyone home, The whole Neighborhood smells of Bacon:-D

i'm making Lemon Angel Delight soon:-)
edit: And a Merry Christmas, Festivus, Yaksmas, or any other Celebration anyone has going on (or even nothing at all:)

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