Kabal - Unicorns, Ninjas, and a full can of grade A whoopass *


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Goblin Squad Member

I think its just not safe for ones mental health.

Goblin Squad Member

Is there a time limit on how far back you can edit your post?

Goblin Squad Member

<Kabal> Sunnfire wrote:
Is there a time limit on how far back you can edit your post?

1 hour.

Goblin Squad Member

Damn. I will have to create an entirely new thread to make my first post contain all our information.

I'm not sure I can abandon this thread like that.. we mean so much to each other.

Goblin Squad Member

Make a bold-faced, all-caps, large-text, and otherwise-enhanced final post here, directing everyone to the new home of our lovely conclave?

Goblin Squad Member

Yep, just start a new topic called "Why Everyone Who is Anyone Should Join Kabal!"

And this current wonderful topic shall drop down to the Join Kabal topic in the lost vaults of greatness.

Goblin Squad Member

I would also like to note that we will offer a witness protection program for anyone that would like to reconsider their decision of joining their current lame to semi-cool guild to instead come and drink our kool-aid.
Its awesome, who remembers sharkberry? Awesome right? This is like that but with explosions and lens flare.
Seriously if the Kool-Aid man had been filled with our Kool-Aid he would have kicked your house over with his combat boots, stolen your girlfriend, and your mom would have replaced all the photos of you with pictures of him.

Goblin Squad Member

<Kabal> Sunnfire wrote:

I would also like to note that we will offer a witness protection program for anyone that would like to reconsider their decision of joining their current lame to semi-cool guild to instead come and drink our kool-aid.

Its awesome, who remembers sharkberry? Awesome right? This is like that but with explosions and lens flare.
Seriously if the Kool-Aid man had been filled with our Kool-Aid he would have kicked your house over with his combat boots, stolen your girlfriend, and your mom would have replaced all the photos of you with pictures of him.

nah ... but the keepers may be interested in buying a few unicorns.

Where did you get them from anyway? Breed them ?

Goblin Squad Member

We import them from china.

Sometimes we have to send them back due to the lead paint.

Goblin Squad Member

Guurzak tried breedin unicorns but id nub work da rite way. Neber got no more unicorns, just sum green centaurs.

Scarab Sages

Guurzak wrote:
Guurzak tried breedin unicorns but id nub work da rite way. Neber got no more unicorns, just sum green centaurs.

I wanna see this before I try to buy it...

Goblin Squad Member

I remember Sharkberry. And Purplesaurus Rex. But straight up cherry is still my favorite

Goblin Squad Member

<Magistry> Toombstone wrote:
I remember Sharkberry. And Purplesaurus Rex. But straight up cherry is still my favorite

This is where I stick with the old and well known adage, 'Don't take food advice from a floating eyeball'.

Cherry... you are off the Christmas card list.

Goblin Squad Member

Having viewed a few recorded streams of the first Alpha last night, it is totally apparent that the main drive for this game is how many men can stand on each others' shoulders.

Now if only the bottom guy could walk with all of them on his shoulders around the town, that would really be a sight to see. :-)

Goblin Squad Member

Bunibuni showing up in a very loud colored checked suit and standing in front of the wagon with the huge logo "Dr. Bunibuni's Cure-All Magical Happy Answers Medicine"

After big drum beats to draw in the crowd ...

"Good Evening my friends! Well, it is a good evening for some But not for all. I'm here today, my friends, to make it a good evening for everyone! You say, friends, that you feel a bit listless? That you are a bit down? Depressed? Your settlement just doesn't seem to be the right fit for you anymore? They are talking of not building training facilities for the roles you want to play? You don't want to be a farmer? You don't want to be a miner? You don't want to chop trees? But that's where your settlement strengths lie and you want to lie somewhere else?"

"Then you are in luck, my friends. Dr. Bunibuni's Cure-All Magical Happy Answers Medicine will take care of those problems and restore you to the vim and vigor you had long before you started looking at settlements! Your aches will miraculously vanish! Your skin, ladies, will become smooth and caress-ably soft! Your muscles will tighten! You will lose those last few pounds you have been worrying about endlessly! Your eyesight will improve. Your ability to make love all night long will come back to you or if you never had the ability in the first place, you will gain it with only one bottle of Dr. Bunibuni's Cure-All Magical Happy Answers Medicine!!"

"How, you ask? Quite easily, my friends! For two measly copper pieces, you got one bottle of Dr. Bunibuni's Cure-All Magical Happy Answer Medicine. But wait! Because you all seem like good noble hard-working people with lots of friends and family, for you alone, I will make available TWO bottles of Dr. Bunibuni's Cure-All Magical Happy Answer Medicine for ONLY 3 copper pieces. That's right, friends, only THREE copper pieces! That way you can have an extra bottle to give to your favorite spouse, child, parent or friend!"

"How does it work, Dr. Bunibuni, you ask? What is in it? Well friends, I cannot reveal all the secrets of what this special elixir contains as others would attempt to copy it and sell it to the public without understanding all the wonderful magical mysterious benefits of taking the ONE the ONLY the ORIGINAL Dr. Bunibuni's Cure-All Magical Happy Answer Medicine! But I can tell you it contains special herbs that were collected from far away lands at great danger to myself and my party members. And yes, it does contain an amount of alcohol in it so it is mot for the very young to take. Then a secret group of Kabal mystics and shamens cast long and mysterious spells upon the brew to make it the Cure-All Magical Happy Answer Medicine it is today!"

"How does it work, you ask? Quite easily, my friends! You all need do is go home, open the bottle and then drink it all down as quickly as you can. Wait a few minutes then summon your magical internet communications device and go to the infamous Goblin Works website."

HERE.

"Once there, go to the Land Rush and go to the Leaderboard or the Guild Index and then click "LEAVE" next to your current settlement name, the one that has made you unhappy, listless, bored, given you wrinkles and dried skin, making you look older then you feel you should be and unable to make love all night long. Then find the Kabal settlement and click "APPLY!"

"That is just Step One, my friends. The hardest yet easiest step to take."

"Then you move on to Step Two. Go to the Kabal home website. The website link can be found under the settlement's name. Join the Kabal website."

HERE.

"Then, the most important step, introduce yourself and tell them Dr. Bunibuni sent you. Then tell us what you are looking for in a settlement that will make you happy, full of vim and vigor, will give you smooth, wrinkle-free, baby-like youthful skin, remove your aches and pains and give you back [or give you for the first time] the ability to make love all night long!"

"It is as simple as that, my friends, and I hope I will soon be able to call most of you "neighbor"! Our magnificent, mysterious, wondrous leadership listens to its members and makes plans accordingly. But you must act soon! Dr. Bunibuni's Cure-All Magical Happy Answers Medicine will continue to lose its mystical, magical, mysterious potency over the next few short weeks. Each week you wait to take Dr. Bunibuni's Cure-All Magical Happy Answers Medicine and follow the simple directions that come with it, the less happiness, fullness of vim and vigor; smooth, wrinkle-free, baby-like youthful skin, removal of your aches and pains and the less ability to make love all night long, you will have!"

"So who will buy a bottle for themselves? Remember, TWO bottle for only Three copper pieces! Even greater discounts available to entire Companies who wish to partake of Dr. Bunibuni's Cure-All Magical Happy Answers Medicine!!"

"So step right up, folks! Step right up! The pretty lady in the chainmail bikini will be happy to take your coin, gentlemen! Ladies! The handsome male with the white hair and pointy ears will be happy to take yours! This is a limited time offer, folks, remember that. And each week you wait to purchase Dr. Bunibuni's Cure-All Magical Happy Answers Medicine, the weaker its effects will be on you!"

Join Kabal!

Goblin Squad Member

1 person marked this as a favorite.

Also, I'm baking cookies. Your recruiter gets them, maybe they will share.

Goblin Squad Member

"HMMM ... so we are in a forest now, are we," Bunibuni muses to himself after the week 5 results come out. "Wonder why that is?"

He looks around and notices Sunnfire eating a cookie. FINALLY notices Sunnfire has pointy ears. [failed that perception check for WAAAAYYYYYY too long!] Notice a couple of others with pointy ears hanging around.

"DOH!" Smacks self in forehead.

Goblin Squad Member

@Bunibuni & Kabal

You also missed Canis Castrum's famous doge doughnuts. Do you guys need help moving? We've got space in our truck. *points at Crossroads Moving Company Truck* :)

Goblin Squad Member

Been outside working with client in the NC heat. Now can't think of anything witty, funny or stupid to write here.

Join Kabal!

Goblin Squad Member

Haha.. join Kabal even if you live in the Caymans and have to deal with crappy internet. We will still love you.

Goblin Squad Member

@Sunnfire,

The bad internet is the Caymans way of saying, "You should be by the pool instead." ;)

Goblin Squad Member

omnipotentseal wrote:

@Sunnfire,

The bad internet is the Caymans way of saying, "You should be by the pool instead." ;)

or in a bar

Goblin Squad Member

<kabal> Bunibuni wrote:
omnipotentseal wrote:

@Sunnfire,

The bad internet is the Caymans way of saying, "You should be by the pool instead." ;)

or in a bar

The best pools and bars are both at once.

Goblin Squad Member

Bringslite of Fidelis wrote:
<kabal> Bunibuni wrote:
omnipotentseal wrote:

@Sunnfire,

The bad internet is the Caymans way of saying, "You should be by the pool instead." ;)

or in a bar
The best pools and bars are both at once.

You are making me jealous again! What's the going price for taking out your own settlement leader for having more fun than you are?

Goblin Squad Member

<kabal> Bunibuni wrote:
Bringslite of Fidelis wrote:
<kabal> Bunibuni wrote:
omnipotentseal wrote:

@Sunnfire,

The bad internet is the Caymans way of saying, "You should be by the pool instead." ;)

or in a bar
The best pools and bars are both at once.
You are making me jealous again! What's the going price for taking out your own settlement leader for having more fun than you are?

"Taking out" as in killing him/her?

"Taking out" as in ... for a drink?
"Taking out" as in ... for a date??

Goblin Squad Member

Kitsune Aou wrote:
<kabal> Bunibuni wrote:
Bringslite of Fidelis wrote:
<kabal> Bunibuni wrote:
omnipotentseal wrote:

@Sunnfire,

The bad internet is the Caymans way of saying, "You should be by the pool instead." ;)

or in a bar
The best pools and bars are both at once.
You are making me jealous again! What's the going price for taking out your own settlement leader for having more fun than you are?

"Taking out" as in killing him/her?

"Taking out" as in ... for a drink?
"Taking out" as in ... for a date??

All things are negotiable.

P.S. I am both swimming and drinking while writing this post.

Goblin Squad Member

I am neither swimming nor drinking, but am having an "interesting" email conversation about how important a user thinks it is that he be given a public space static for his machine so that he doesn't have to "go through the hassle" of using the vpn to access it from off campus.

Goblin Squad Member

Caldeathe Baequiannia wrote:
I am neither swimming nor drinking, but am having an "interesting" email conversation about how important a user thinks it is that he be given a public space static for his machine so that he doesn't have to "go through the hassle" of using the vpn to access it from off campus.

<sarcasm>Well, of course! That's completely reasonable, safe, and totally economic.</sarcasm>

Goblin Squad Member

"Swimming and drinking" as in drinking alcohol? or swimming and drinking as in "I can't swim and am swallowing lots of water while drowning!"

Goblin Squad Member

<kabal> Bunibuni wrote:
"Swimming and drinking" as in drinking alcohol? or swimming and drinking as in "I can't swim and am swallowing lots of water while drowning!"

Hah.

Goblin Squad Member

Caldeathe Baequiannia wrote:
I am neither swimming nor drinking, but am having an "interesting" email conversation about how important a user thinks it is that he be given a public space static for his machine so that he doesn't have to "go through the hassle" of using the vpn to access it from off campus.

Ha.. I have had that argument, recently in fact.

Goblin Squad Member

1 person marked this as a favorite.
<kabal> Bunibuni wrote:
"Swimming and drinking" as in drinking alcohol? or swimming and drinking as in "I can't swim and am swallowing lots of water while drowning!"

Both?

Goblin Squad Member

<Kabal> Sunnfire wrote:
P.S. I am both swimming and drinking while writing this post.

Sounds as if you're in Arizona with Kitsune and me. Typical afternoon pursuit :-).

Goblin Squad Member

<kabal> Bunibuni wrote:
"Swimming and drinking" as in drinking alcohol? or swimming and drinking as in "I can't swim and am swallowing lots of water while drowning!"

*attempts*

*fails Fort save and nearly drowns*

Maybe I should stick to just drinking. You can't do both at the same time.

Goblin Squad Member

Work up to it. Start with shower beer, then progress to more advanced challenges.

Shower beer is actually pretty awesome.

Goblin Squad Member

"Shower beer" sounds like your cleaning the hair of the dog. ;)

Goblin Squad Member

Whee! Thunderstorms! Power flickering at work. Must remember to hit "save" every 30 seconds or so in order not to lose most of my work if computer loses power again!

Goblin Squad Member

<kabal> Bunibuni wrote:
Whee! Thunderstorms! Power flickering at work. Must remember to hit "save" every 30 seconds or so in order not to lose most of my work if computer loses power again!

Always fun. In my case, we have circuits throughout the building that are on a giant UPS system (imagine 30 diesel-truck-sized batteries) that holds all our computer systems up long enough for our automated generator to kick-in.

And I work for the power company, so we bring our own power back online, too. :P

Goblin Squad Member

Kitsune Aou wrote:
<kabal> Bunibuni wrote:
Whee! Thunderstorms! Power flickering at work. Must remember to hit "save" every 30 seconds or so in order not to lose most of my work if computer loses power again!

Always fun. In my case, we have circuits throughout the building that are on a giant UPS system (imagine 30 diesel-truck-sized batteries) that holds all our computer systems up long enough for our automated generator to kick-in.

And I work for the power company, so we bring our own power back online, too. :P

I work for the government [state not federal] in an 80+ year old building. The wiring is so old and bad that we can't run the microwave and the copier, that sit next to each other, at the same time!

I think that some of the wires in the wall are those old paper-wrapped wires that they first used when wiring buildings for electricity. :-)

Goblin Squad Member

<kabal> Bunibuni wrote:

I think that some of the wires in the wall are those old paper-wrapped wires that they first used when wiring buildings for electricity. :-)

Those are terrifying.

Goblin Squad Member

<kabal> Bunibuni wrote:
I work for the government [state not federal] in an 80+ year old building. The wiring is so old and bad that we can't run the microwave and the copier, that sit next to each other, at the same time!

Gah, I just moved from that kind of place. With near 100 degree weather, I'm happy we have consistent electricity for AC.

Goblin Squad Member

Happy 4th of July! On this day in history, lots of things happened. But I'm not going to tell you a thing about what happened because history is ... so old! Thousands and Thousands of years old! If you really want to know, go read a few history books! :-)

Goblin Squad Member

I prefer time travel.

Goblin Squad Member

<Kabal> Hunter wrote:
I prefer time travel.

Now the question is - TARDIS, DeLorean, or Circle K phone booth?

Goblin Squad Member

1 person marked this as a favorite.

Tardis! It has a swimming pool.

Goblin Squad Member

Tardis.. is a phone booth..? Which can contain a delorean.

Goblin Squad Member

I always liked the Chronomancer from 2E AD&D. Rarely used it though for it was more of a protagonist and all the other players unless Chronomancers themselves were supporting roles.

Goblin Squad Member

<Kabal> Sunnfire wrote:
Tardis.. is a phone booth..? Which can contain a delorean.

This may cause a either some sort of violent explosion, a tear in the time-space continuum, or both.

Goblin Squad Member

Kitsune Aou wrote:
<Kabal> Sunnfire wrote:
Tardis.. is a phone booth..? Which can contain a delorean.
This may cause a either some sort of violent explosion, a tear in the time-space continuum, or both.

Like a portable hole arrow that destroys the entire multiverse... or does nothing at all.

Goblin Squad Member

We may or may not have those.
But you probably want to not toss our baggage around like This guy either way.

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