Phat Loot


Pathfinder Online

Grand Lodge

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(WARNING!!! This thread is for levity purposes only, please do not shout, take off your shirt, or flip the table. )

<----My Nose

Ok guys, lets list off the Phat Loot we want to see in the game. I'll start.

A Level 14 Bugbear Fighter dies an awful fiery death and he drops a Recipe for the +3 Kobold Cleaver.

Goblin Squad Member

Ring of Detect Fire
Charges: Unlimited
Use: At will, Automatic
Range: Touch

(stolen from google)

Goblin Squad Member

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The Fork of Truth and the Knife of Lies.

Liberty's Edge Goblin Squad Member

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Kill an Ogre and get a recipe for a Pink Tutu of Grace - +4 to Dex and AC [which come to think of it would wind up giving you +6 AC}.


Kill a Cave Troll and get a +2 Charisma Banner.

Goblin Squad Member

TEO Mordecaimanes wrote:
...the Knife of Lies.

No no, it's the Cake of Lies.

Scarab Sages

Killing a Kobold near a White Dragon Lair and drop a Harp of Charming.

Come at me Ladies, listen to this music of mine...
/spellsong
/cast Lust

Goblin Squad Member

Beware the omnipotent... feather of tickling!

*tickle, tickle*

MUHAHAHAHAHAHA!

- Jascolich

Goblin Squad Member

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While not technically loot, someone should build a Dread Gazebo.

Goblin Squad Member

High Heels of Charisma +6

*only useable by Male paladins.*

Scarab Sages

Gol Malik. wrote:

High Heels of Charisma +6

*only useable by Male paladins.*

Elves only? hahaha

Goblin Squad Member

Spork of Cannibalism anyone. Once acquired you only regain health when attacking your own race.


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KotC Carbon D. Metric wrote:

(WARNING!!! This thread is for levity purposes only, please do not shout, take off your shirt, or flip the table. )

<----My Nose

Ok guys, lets list off the Phat Loot we want to see in the game. I'll start.

A Level 14 Bugbear Fighter dies an awful fiery death and he drops a Recipe for the +3 Kobold Cleaver.

It doesn't actually cleave kobolds. It just makes three more of me.

Goblin Squad Member

Kobold Cleaver wrote:
It just makes three more of me.

Thus leading the list of Forbidden Artifacts?

Goblin Squad Member

T7V Jazzlvraz wrote:
Kobold Cleaver wrote:
It just makes three more of me.
Thus leading the list of Forbidden Artifacts?

I was going to say something about each one having 1/3 the brain, but then wondered if anyone would notice....

Goblin Squad Member

Feather Token: Tree please! Those things have so many uses; you can use the tree as a ladder, as a door, as materials for crafting, as a lookout perch, as a wall for your Dungeon Crasher build to run things into (in 3.5 anyways), as the start of your druid grove, as an offensive AoE, as a raft, as a very large slingshot, as the material component for your druidic treant-making spells, or for landscaping needs.

Goblin Squad Member

A classic item.

Girdle of Masculinity/Femininity.
For those that don't know of this item, it changes your gender and you can't remove it without a remove curse spell.

Goblin Squad Member

Banesama wrote:

Girdle of Masculinity/Femininity.

I don't think "phat" means what some of you think it means.

Goblin Squad Member

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Neither does cleavage...

Goblin Squad Member

Being wrote:
Neither does cleavage...

Cleavage always means what you think it means.

Goblin Squad Member

C'mon, feather tokens are hip, phat, and happenin'.

Goblin Squad Member

Caldeathe Baequiannia wrote:
Banesama wrote:

Girdle of Masculinity/Femininity.

I don't think "phat" means what some of you think it means.

As a DM, that girdle was "phat". It was an excellent tool to make me laugh. I miss the cursed items found in 1E and 2E ADnD.

Goblin Squad Member

Unfortunately, some folks had DMs in High School who thought cursed items should be common, Detect Curse didn't exist, and a single Remove Curse could be the focus of a school-year-long campaign. Result: a seriously risk-averse player-base, and a DM who couldn't believe we'd refuse all this largesse he was putting in our paths.

EDIT: I hope I can channel some memories of that low-magic campaigning when I play PFO; I'll be wanting to use only whatever items I can thread and then the most-useless trash I can locate, knowing how often Pharasma'll be paying attention to me.

Goblin Squad Member

T7V Jazzlvraz wrote:
(snip)... knowing how often Pharasma'll be paying attention to me.

Speaking of which, we'll have to develop a whole set of "setting-appropriate" oaths and curses.

Goblin Squad Member

Caldeathe Baequiannia wrote:
Speaking of which, we'll have to develop a whole set of "setting-appropriate" oaths and curses.

By Vectron's Golden Wings!

Goblin Squad Member

T7V Jazzlvraz wrote:

Unfortunately, some folks had DMs in High School who thought cursed items should be common, Detect Curse didn't exist, and a single Remove Curse could be the focus of a school-year-long campaign. Result: a seriously risk-averse player-base, and a DM who couldn't believe we'd refuse all this largesse he was putting in our paths.

EDIT: I hope I can channel some memories of that low-magic campaigning when I play PFO; I'll be wanting to use only whatever items I can thread and then the most-useless trash I can locate, knowing how often Pharasma'll be paying attention to me.

I understand that. I played with a few DMs that were like that. I wasn't though. I just used cursed items when I thought the players were getting to careless and equipping everything without thought.

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