Putting tiny hats on T-Rexes


Pathfinder First Edition General Discussion


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So a Greater Hat of Disguise gives the creature wearing it at will Alter Self. Alter Self has no size, creature type, or other limiting factor on it. So you can entirely Awaken a T-rex, put it in a magic top hat, and have it turn into a 36 Str little girl in a frilly pink dress.


An interesting way to sneak Godzilla into town, I'll admit.


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Magic, Polymorph subschool wrote:
If a polymorph spell is cast on a creature that is smaller than Small or larger than Medium, first adjust its ability scores to one of these two sizes using the following table before applying the bonuses granted by the polymorph spell.
Table wrote:
old size Gargantuan -12 Str, +4 Dex, -6 Con, new size Medium

Tyrannosaurus Str 32, Dex 13, Con 19

Becomes Str 20, Dex 17, Con 13

+2 Str from Alter Self

Str 22, Dex 17, Con 13 in an adult human woman (a little girl would have the Young template, and you can't Polymorph into templated creatures) in a frilly pink dress


Aww, that's less fun. Still pretty useful though.


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Jiraiya22 wrote:
Aww, that's less fun. Still pretty useful though.

Especially if you piss her off, she could simply attempt to tempt said annoyance out into yonder wilderness, throw off her hat and then eat said annoyance.


Turning into a halfling lady would get you closer to the 'little girl' look.
Would the polymorphed T-rex still have Swallow Whole?


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"Awww what's a little lady doing out here in town all alone? Need help looking for your parents?"
"RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!!!!!"

Dark Archive

Awakened animals are fun PCs. Had a friend's character get reincarnated in 3.5e into a panther. He was a halfling rogue/barbarian, so it became kinda like the pouncebarian at higher levels.

Lantern Lodge Customer Service Dire Care Bear Manager

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Samasboy1 wrote:
Str 22, Dex 17, Con 13 in an adult human woman (a little girl would have the Young template, and you can't Polymorph into templated creatures) in a frilly pink dress

You're Welcome.


Oh god...

My Grandma! What big teeth you have!!

My Grandma! What small arms you have!!!


Hat of disguise uses disguise self, not alter self.


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BigNorseWolf wrote:
Hat of disguise uses disguise self, not alter self.

Greater Hat of Disguise uses alter self.

Liberty's Edge

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BigNorseWolf wrote:
Hat of disguise uses disguise self, not alter self.

Which is why the OP specified a Greater Hat of Disguise.

EDIT: Ninja'd. Ah, well, at least I had a link...

RPG Superstar 2008 Top 32

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BigNorseWolf wrote:
Hat of disguise uses disguise self, not alter self.

greater hat of disguise

RPG Superstar 2008 Top 32

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Doubly ninja'd


I used a hat of disguise on a red dragon to make it look like a white dragon and it attacks with cast cone of cold and cone of cold in a wand, party gears up with fire damage makes sad faces.


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Matthew Downie wrote:

Turning into a halfling lady would get you closer to the 'little girl' look.

Would the polymorphed T-rex still have Swallow Whole?

Wait... why?

Scarab Sages

Samasboy1 wrote:
Str 22, Dex 17, Con 13 in an adult human woman (a little girl would have the Young template, and you can't Polymorph into templated creatures) in a frilly pink dress

Halfling in a frilly pink dress, holding a lolipop.

Pity the schoolyard bully that pushes her down and knocks her hat off.


Glutton wrote:
Matthew Downie wrote:

Turning into a halfling lady would get you closer to the 'little girl' look.

Would the polymorphed T-rex still have Swallow Whole?
Wait... why?

Well, if it turned into a Medium humanoid it could swallow an entire gnome. As a halfling, it would be limited to swallowing Tiny creatures, which isn't as much fun.


Daniel Turner Zen Archer wrote:
An interesting way to sneak Godzilla into town, I'll admit.

That is a good point, but after watching Godzilla (2014) and Dragon Wars, I have concluded all kaiju have mad rogue skills (or all humans in giant monster movies have Wis 2) and can easily sneak into town (and in Dragon Wars, they can sneak around town in broad daylight) without magical items. Still I like the hat....


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Matthew Downie wrote:
Glutton wrote:
Matthew Downie wrote:

Turning into a halfling lady would get you closer to the 'little girl' look.

Would the polymorphed T-rex still have Swallow Whole?
Wait... why?
Well, if it turned into a Medium humanoid it could swallow an entire gnome. As a halfling, it would be limited to swallowing Tiny creatures, which isn't as much fun.

You are walking down the street in the dead of night, when you hear a strange gurgling noise. You spot a figure in the alley way.

That size...it must be a child. She is in a ragged and dirty dress. You spot a fuzzy tail coming from between her arms. The creature seems to be struggling against her grasp. Is this poor child must be trying to catch herself a pet.

You come closer, telling her to be gentle. As you approach, you notice that her features are...off. Her muscles are too firm, and her body too full to be a child. As your hand taps her shoulder, she begins to turn around.

You see now that the cat's tail is coming from cat hips set squarely in the 'child's' unhinged jaws. Blood is trickling from where the waist meets her mouth. Its legs flail desperately as they try to both gain traction and attack the offending 'girl'. Noticing your presence, she quickly grabs the legs and shoves them down her mouth as she prepares to face you.


Artanthos wrote:
Samasboy1 wrote:
Str 22, Dex 17, Con 13 in an adult human woman (a little girl would have the Young template, and you can't Polymorph into templated creatures) in a frilly pink dress

Halfling in a frilly pink dress, holding a lolipop.

Pity the schoolyard bully that pushes her down and knocks her hat off.

Now I have to ask my GM to use this character in ANY campaign we play in.


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lemeres wrote:
Matthew Downie wrote:
Glutton wrote:
Matthew Downie wrote:

Turning into a halfling lady would get you closer to the 'little girl' look.

Would the polymorphed T-rex still have Swallow Whole?
Wait... why?
Well, if it turned into a Medium humanoid it could swallow an entire gnome. As a halfling, it would be limited to swallowing Tiny creatures, which isn't as much fun.

You are walking down the street in the dead of night, when you hear a strange gurgling noise. You spot a figure in the alley way.

That size...it must be a child. She is in a ragged and dirty dress. You spot a fuzzy tail coming from between her arms. The creature seems to be struggling against her grasp. Is this poor child must be trying to catch herself a pet.

You come closer, telling her to be gentle. As you approach, you notice that her features are...off. Her muscles are too firm, and her body too full to be a child. As your hand taps her shoulder, she begins to turn around.

You see now that the cat's tail is coming from cat hips set squarely in the 'child's' unhinged jaws. Blood is trickling from where the waist meets her mouth. Its legs flail desperately as they try to both gain traction and attack the offending 'girl'. Noticing your presence, she quickly grabs the legs and shoves them down her mouth as she prepares to face you.

Well... I'm never sleeping again. Thanks for that.


Mechagamera wrote:
Daniel Turner Zen Archer wrote:
An interesting way to sneak Godzilla into town, I'll admit.
That is a good point, but after watching Godzilla (2014) and Dragon Wars, I have concluded all kaiju have mad rogue skills (or all humans in giant monster movies have Wis 2) and can easily sneak into town (and in Dragon Wars, they can sneak around town in broad daylight) without magical items. Still I like the hat....

Ah Dragon Wars... truly a contender for the "Worst Excuse For A Movie I've Seen In The Last Five Years" award


Daniel Turner Zen Archer wrote:
Artanthos wrote:
Samasboy1 wrote:
Str 22, Dex 17, Con 13 in an adult human woman (a little girl would have the Young template, and you can't Polymorph into templated creatures) in a frilly pink dress

Halfling in a frilly pink dress, holding a lolipop.

Pity the schoolyard bully that pushes her down and knocks her hat off.

Now I have to ask my GM to use this character in ANY campaign we play in.

It is, admittedly, a rather good character to put in as a villain. And at an early level. Those stats are close enough to a PC's base stats that it wouldn't be too much of a problem to face them in their 'human' form. Maybe make it a young one in order to reduce hit dice/BAB. Just have them face off against a bizarre person, get a certain point in the fight, and just have the enemy say 'screw it' and take off the hat.

Luckily, due to their size, they are fairly noticeable in their true form. So if they reveal themselves in the middle of the city (and, quite honestly, why would they bother disguising themselves for reasons other than blending in? I am sure there are reasons, but it seems like a major one), then you could have the fight cut short of TPK by having the city guard show up to distract it. One long trail of rampage and 'mysterious disappearance' later, and you have a reoccurring villain. The party must then follow a trail of missing pets, unexplained destruction, and stolen goods/serial killings/organ snatchings? in order to discover the truth.

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