For Elf Liberation Through Workers Revolution!


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Dear comrades,

We share warm fraternal greetings with you on the occasion of your historic victory in Iceland and, with you, look forward to the day when elves and goblins shall live together in brotherly, multiracial harmony after we smash the filthy pinkskins.

Vive le Galt!


In U.S.S.R., elves own means of production, not bourgeois father figure!


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The Golarion Union of Murderhoboes for the Betterment of Others supports the initiative taken by the elfin kin and allies in Iceland against this tyrannical display of disregard for their civil liberties. Stay strong friends, stay strong.

Sincerely yours,
~Jaspar "Shank Him Louis" Kahrdboordebachs~
your local GUMBO representative


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Green and Grey, Unite and, er, Spay!
Green and Wood, Unite and Protrude!
Green and High, Unite with Pie!
Green and Drow, Unite and Glow!

Strength through demihuman/humanoid joint struggle! We salute the stalwart proletarian Olven masses of Iceland! Long live Chairman Melf! Long live Marxist-Leninist-Calistrianite thought!


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This sort of thing makes me sick! Granted, Lady Dice, who's half-elven, is a softer touch with the estate's goblins than I am, but ye gods! So what, we're all just supposed ignore industrial progress in favor of pastoral pipe dream? This is exactly the sort of "historic victory" I'd expect to hear bandied about in the goblin kennels.

Liberty's Edge

*spits* Shoulda 'spected it. Bloody elves.


EvE Online players are becoming acquainted with the 13 Yule Lads the past 2 or 3 years.

An interesting bakers' dozen of characters to be sure!


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Pathfinder Starfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Roleplaying Game Subscriber
Comrade Anklebiter wrote:

Dear comrades,

We share warm fraternal greetings with you on the occasion of your historic victory in Iceland and, with you, look forward to the day when elves and goblins shall live together in brotherly, multiracial harmony after we smash the filthy pinkskins.

Vive le Galt!

I am confused by this support from the little communist goblins...

1) This is a victory of private property over the 'needs' of the state.

2) Of course the article does not mention the 1000s of greenskins goblins who lost out on their union jobs of building a road.

Liberty's Edge

I dinnae care about the politics o' it. I jus' wants a opportunity t' blame elves fer more.


The evil (bourgeois; pinkskin) Icelandic state, Brother Kretzer.

As for the loss of good, unionized goblin jobs, between you and me,

Spoiler:
the elves have been offering us some sweet kickbacks if we put in a bid on that contract for the tunnel to Svartalfheim.


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Lord Dice wrote:
So what, we're all just supposed ignore industrial progress in favor of pastoral pipe dream?

M'mm. You'd know all about that, wouldn't you? I've seen you and the Comte playing at shepherdesses in the woods (or playing with shepherdesses. Whatevs). The photos came out beautifully, just so you know, which is why I got first go at delousing the chambermaids on Christmas day this year. Ha HA!

John Kretzer wrote:

I am confused by this support from the little communist goblins...

1) This is a victory of private property over the 'needs' of the state.

2) Of course the article does not mention the 1000s of greenskins goblins who lost out on their union jobs of building a road.

1) Whose state, comrade - whose state?

2) They're building the ROAD TO SOCIALISM INSTEAD!!! Or possibly setting fire to it. Hard to tell.

EDIT: Ninja'd by DA. Curses!

EDIT 2: Who let that dwarf in?

Liberty's Edge

Limeylongears wrote:
EDIT 2: Who let that dwarf in?

Ye ain't havin' a door nor wall that'll keep me out, landlubber.


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Who are you calling a landlubber, Suzi Squat-ro?

Inner Sea World Guide wrote:
...but the elves' impossibly quick vessels make short work of those who dare defy their frighteningly masked commanders

Frighteningly masked, you see. So there. *thrrppp!*


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Comrade Anklebiter wrote:

The evil (bourgeois; pinkskin) Icelandic state, Brother Kretzer.

As for the loss of good, unionized goblin jobs, between you and me, ** spoiler omitted **

Just ignore anything the Lord Dice has to say on the subject. He's been especially grouchy since, after days (if not weeks) of consultation with the family lawyer, I explained that his official title henceforth would be "The Lord-Consort Dice" whereas I should be addressed as "The Lineal Sovereign Lady Dice."

Yes, I will gladly give kickbacks to goblins. And if the coffers at Manse Dice are running low, so what? Tomorrow is another day! I'm an half-elf, I'll just outlive this Lord-Consort Dice and marry another! (Yes, for the money, that's how it works in the upper echelons of society; no insult, Doodles, but I wouldn't expect a goblin to understand.)


Pathfinder Starfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Roleplaying Game Subscriber
Comrade Anklebiter wrote:

The evil (bourgeois; pinkskin) Icelandic state, Brother Kretzer.

As for the loss of good, unionized goblin jobs, between you and me, ** spoiler omitted **

Are you sure you can trust the elves?

Remember the time you trusted gnomes and they turned out to be bankers?

Or the time you trusted dwarves and they tu4rned out to be anti-union and more about their family bussiness...


Lady Dice wrote:

Just ignore anything the Lord Dice has to say on the subject. He's been especially grouchy since, after days (if not weeks) of consultation with the family lawyer, I explained that his official title henceforth would be "The Lord-Consort Dice" whereas I should be addressed as "The Lineal Sovereign Lady Dice."

Yes, I will gladly give kickbacks to goblins. And if the coffers at Manse Dice are running low, so what? Tomorrow is another day! I'm an half-elf, I'll just outlive this Lord-Consort Dice and marry another! (Yes, for the money, that's how it works in the upper echelons of society; no insult, Doodles, but I wouldn't expect a goblin to understand.)

Good morning, milinealsovereignlady.

[Waggles eyebrows]


Suzi Squatro


White Knight Doodlebug wrote:
Lady Dice wrote:

Just ignore anything the Lord Dice has to say on the subject. He's been especially grouchy since, after days (if not weeks) of consultation with the family lawyer, I explained that his official title henceforth would be "The Lord-Consort Dice" whereas I should be addressed as "The Lineal Sovereign Lady Dice."

Yes, I will gladly give kickbacks to goblins. And if the coffers at Manse Dice are running low, so what? Tomorrow is another day! I'm an half-elf, I'll just outlive this Lord-Consort Dice and marry another! (Yes, for the money, that's how it works in the upper echelons of society; no insult, Doodles, but I wouldn't expect a goblin to understand.)

Good morning, milinealsovereignlady.

[Waggles eyebrows]

No need to be so formal, Doodles. "Your Ladyship" is fine for house pets, or rather, "the indoor serving staff," excuse me, "proletarian residents of Manse Dice." (So sorry about that. Anyhow, "your Ladyship" is fine.)


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Comrade Anklebiter wrote:

Dear comrades,

We share warm fraternal greetings with you on the occasion of your historic victory in Iceland and, with you, look forward to the day when elves and goblins shall live together in brotherly, multiracial harmony after we smash the filthy pinkskins.

Vive le Galt!

Ankle Biter is a fraud! I will destroy this blight and unmask him as the Corporate Fat Cat he is. I spit on you Ankle Biter, I spit on you.

-The Taint


That's not me!


Pathfinder Adventure Subscriber

I've always imagined you more like Toadwort from the Gummi Bears.


I always kinda liked Toadwort, even if he was a Stooge of the Plutocracy.


White Knight Doodlebug wrote:


Good morning, milinealsovereignlady.

[Waggles eyebrows]

Do What Thou Wilt (in addition, Do It Until You Wilt), Sirrah. Le Comte will be jealous, however, as I've had to restrict him to his own species after the Basilisk Incident. You go ahead, though, Mellors; due to a 500 year lifespan, I could tell you things about that family (the Dowager Duchess of Dice especially) that would amaze and astound you, and from personal experience, too. I'd recommend you finding out *what* for yourself...

[Waggles ears]

The Exchange

Elf Party I never suspected it was a political unit. Who'd have thunk it?


Elf Power!


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Not really about elves, but I didn't feel like starting a new thread. Also, I don't know if this has been passed around yet:

Man Builds Awesome Hobbit House

Dark Archive

Pathfinder Adventure, Adventure Path Subscriber

pretty cool.


Since nobody has yet started a Ukraine thread...

Ukraine

By comparison,

Denmark.


Have they finally settled that war that Ukraine is in?

**is refusing to read the link until answer is given**

RPG Superstar 2010 Top 32

MagusJanus wrote:

Have they finally settled that war that Ukraine is in?

**is refusing to read the link until answer is given**

If you can find a definitive answer to that, I'm sure everyone in the Ukraine would like to know.


Well, last I heard, they let Princess Leia out of jail and had broken into the Emperor's private zoo.


Arizona Town Overrun By Packs of Wild Roving Chihuahuas


I am, how do you say, confused Comrade Anklebiter. In the socialist dominion of Canada, we fought long & hard to banish the bourgeois elves from our nation. They appropriate the forests of the people, they murder the honest & hardworking dwarves (and goblins) using their terrible bows, and they dominate the people using their wretched magic (which they claimed was for "protection"). We had to tear down their damned silver towers! And you say we should liberate them!


Pathfinder Starfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Roleplaying Game Subscriber
Shouting Off Mountain wrote:
I am, how do you say, confused Comrade Anklebiter. In the socialist dominion of Canada, we fought long & hard to banish the bourgeois elves from our nation. They appropriate the forests of the people, they murder the honest & hardworking dwarves (and goblins) using their terrible bows, and they dominate the people using their wretched magic (which they claimed was for "protection"). We had to tear down their damned silver towers! And you say we should liberate them!

Wait...since when do dwarves or goblins work hard? I think you are confused.


John Kretzer wrote:
Shouting Off Mountain wrote:
I am, how do you say, confused Comrade Anklebiter. In the socialist dominion of Canada, we fought long & hard to banish the bourgeois elves from our nation. They appropriate the forests of the people, they murder the honest & hardworking dwarves (and goblins) using their terrible bows, and they dominate the people using their wretched magic (which they claimed was for "protection"). We had to tear down their damned silver towers! And you say we should liberate them!
Wait...since when do dwarves or goblins work hard? I think you are confused.

They sure where working hard at killing those elven plutocrats, that's for sure!

Shadow Lodge

I'm pretty sure the elves in the article are less the Tolkien-style forest-dwelling elves and more like Santa Claus elves.

So, actually, gnomes.


Well, we are for the unity of goblins, elves, dwarves AND gnomes against filthy pinkskin plutocrats (FPP) in Canada as well as everywhere else. If some of our long-eared brethren have gone over to the side of the FPP, then we will have to stick them in Fun-Timey Reeducation Through Labor Supercenters as well.

In the meantime, are political arguments ruining you and your partner's happy day?

Ask Comrade Kshama!


I will have to agree with Orthos comrade anklebiter, the icelandic peoples are confusing elves with gnomes. Elves are worst plutocrats than the pinksins (they CONTROL the pinkskins)


Typical obscurantist bullshiznit. "Oh, those Icelanders, they're so stupid they don't know the difference between elves and gnomes!"

Maybe if Canadians believed in either gnomes OR elves they wouldn't be turning Alberta into a Hellmouth.


But the devils are our friends... they said the would help us defeat the pinkskins, and they gave us candy! They also said something about throwing all the shiny paladins into the hellmouth. Then MOAR candy.


Candy, huh? Hmmm, well, that might change things. I'd have to think about it. I like candy.


Comrade Anklebiter wrote:
Candy, huh? Hmmm, well, that might change things. I'd have to think about it. I like candy.

They did say to avoid those icky demons (apparently they are also plutocrats). They did ask us to find more people, but apparently we weren't understanding right (something about symbols & clerics or summat), so they told us to stick to shiny paladins & elves. Candy from the struggle of the people has never tasted so good!


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Refined sugar is very bad for you, Shouting Off Mounties, and I'm going to be charitable and blame a build-up of naughty toxins for this display of pseudo-revolutionary ultra-leftist phrasemongering, the likes of which I have struggled against for all of my 500 year lifespan. It's all too much - soon, soon I will bugger off to Twinkly Island, with the unicorns and the nymphs and Queen Ellesime and Galadriel at the same flipping time. Or, if I'm bad, it'll be nothing but whale meat and Sigur Ros for all eternity.


Limeylongears wrote:
Refined sugar is very bad for you, Shouting Off Mounties, and I'm going to be charitable and blame a build-up of naughty toxins for this display of pseudo-revolutionary ultra-leftist phrasemongering, the likes of which I have struggled against for all of my 500 year lifespan. It's all too much - soon, soon I will bugger off to Twinkly Island, with the unicorns and the nymphs and Queen Ellesime and Galadriel at the same flipping time. Or, if I'm bad, it'll be nothing but whale meat and Sigur Ros for all eternity.

No, no, the devils told us to throw the unicorns and the nymphs in the hellmouth as well. If them ladys you're talking about are elves, we'll throw them in too.

Whale meat would be tasty. Only the ice trolls are allowed to have some now...

I should say, the candy isnt terribly sweet. It feels awesome, but it isnt sweet.


Shouting Off Mountain wrote:
No, no, the devils told us to throw the unicorns and the nymphs in the hellmouth as well. If them ladys you're talking about are elves, we'll throw them in too.

That strikes me as a waste of lady, but please yourself. Now, for my next number... A-one, two, three four...

(Sings) "Whale meat again, don't know where, don't know when..."


Pathfinder Starfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Roleplaying Game Subscriber
Shouting Off Mountain wrote:
John Kretzer wrote:
Shouting Off Mountain wrote:
I am, how do you say, confused Comrade Anklebiter. In the socialist dominion of Canada, we fought long & hard to banish the bourgeois elves from our nation. They appropriate the forests of the people, they murder the honest & hardworking dwarves (and goblins) using their terrible bows, and they dominate the people using their wretched magic (which they claimed was for "protection"). We had to tear down their damned silver towers! And you say we should liberate them!
Wait...since when do dwarves or goblins work hard? I think you are confused.
They sure where working hard at killing those elven plutocrats, that's for sure!

Also I thought the whole point of socialism was to be lazy...


John Kretzer wrote:
Also I thought the whole point of socialism was to be lazy...

Hear, hear!

Vive le Galt!


Musical Interlude

The Exchange

John Kretzer wrote:
Comrade Anklebiter wrote:

Dear comrades,

We share warm fraternal greetings with you on the occasion of your historic victory in Iceland and, with you, look forward to the day when elves and goblins shall live together in brotherly, multiracial harmony after we smash the filthy pinkskins.

Vive le Galt!

I am confused by this support from the little communist goblins...

1) This is a victory of private property over the 'needs' of the state.

2) Of course the article does not mention the 1000s of greenskins goblins who lost out on their union jobs of building a road.

Must be cave elves cause I dont see trees.

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