Turns out Americans aren't the only ones who suck at geography...


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Although, to be fair, I'd hate to see Yanks' attempts to name Britishiznoid counties.

New Hampshire: Better than Old Hampshire!

Shadow Lodge

Wibbly, Wobbly, Border, Worder

LOL

Seen a set of these on Imgur done by Australians a few weeks back, as well.


Actually, I was rather pleasantly surprised by how many of the examples placed Rhode Island correctly. Did about as well overall as US residents.


Personally, I like the suggestion that we should re-name the row of states from Minnesota to Louisiana "No F@~&ing Clue."


Or at least Iowa...

Silver Crusade

I like the the newly minted "Walter White" state, sound like loads of fun to visit

Sovereign Court

Has Doodlebug ever been to Hampshire? Does he know that Old Hampshire is not a place?

Here's your test:
1. name a county adjacent to Rutland
2. Name the spa town in Warwickshire
3. Name a garden city
4. What body does the Forth Bridge span?
5. Name the smallest city in Pembrokeshire

Easy


No. Yes.

1. Californication.
2. Bath.
3. Old Jersey.
4. I have a feeling that Spanning the Forth Bridge was a song or album title but I can't remember exactly what or by whom.
5. Pissant-on-the-Blighter.

Did you ever deliver my message to Polly Jean?


Canada = Big Scotland. It's TRUE! This is much more fun than real geography.

Also, Old Hampshire is a place - a special place - in DA's heart, which is all that matters, Geraint.

And Pissant-On-The-Blighter is a sport, not a place.


My English ancestor was forced to expatriate from Old Hampshire after he was found in a compromising position with a Jersey cow, a common garden implement and the son of a respected Nonconformist preacher.

Which was much more exciting than my Italian ancestor, who was forced to expatriate after being fingered by his neighbors as a smuggler.

The reasons my Scots and German ancestors were forced to expatriate remains shrouded in mystery and scandal to this day.

Give me your tired, your poor
Your huddled goblins yearning to be free
The wretched refuse of your teeming shore

and, boy, were they wretched.


Well, at least you've got an interesting story or two. Mine were all mercenaries, losers fleeing from Scotland in 1745, and maybe a drunk who ended up on the wrong boat (he never told the same story twice).


Pardon me for living in a country with enough star power to fill out a weather map on its own!


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I'm impressed with New Hampshire's quiet takeover of Dixie. Never thought they had it in them. Once Utah finishes their expansion into 'No F&&*ing Clue', I predict a major Utah/New Hampshire war.


Doodlebug Anklebiter wrote:

My English ancestor was forced to expatriate from Old Hampshire after he was found in a compromising position with a Jersey cow, a common garden implement and the son of a respected Nonconformist preacher.

Which was much more exciting than my Italian ancestor, who was forced to expatriate after being fingered by his neighbors as a smuggler.

The reasons my Scots and German ancestors were forced to expatriate remains shrouded in mystery and scandal to this day.

Give me your tired, your poor
Your huddled goblins yearning to be free
The wretched refuse of your teeming shore

and, boy, were they wretched.

Y'see, it's s**t like this that makes me glad Demesne Dice wasn't a signatory to the the Statutes of Liberty.


The Rutles come from Rutland. It's on Rutland Weekend Television.


Most of the guys filling out those maps were wearing burberry.


Pathfinder Adventure Subscriber

Well, it's good to notice that in the equivalent map of Americans placing European countries I live in "Very High Standard of Living," even if it's also "Cold As F!+&."


Pathfinder Adventure Subscriber

Besides, everyone knows Hampshire is full of heathens.


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heh heh heh


Adventure Path Charter Subscriber; Pathfinder Adventure, Lost Omens Subscriber

I guess I would mix up a lot of eastern European and former Yugoslavian countries as well - perhaps because when I was in school, this was the "Eastern Bloc" anyways, and the separate components of either the USSR or Yogoslavia did not have much relevance at that time. So, nobody cared.

But the US states - not much of an idea, either. Especially the "square states" in the Midwest, north of Texas, would leave me clueless. California, Texas, Florida, Alaska and Hawaii are simple, but after that, it gets complicated. I would get Maine (I´ve been there), New York, Washington, perhaps Nevada, Arizona and New Mexico, and probably Louisiana and maybe even Illinois, but then? Is that Oregon north of California? Are Carolina and South Carolina those two on the straight border running to the Atlantic Ocean? I might get the names of some of the New England states right, but the placement?

But then, fill in the "Bundesländer" here:
http://www.deutsch-werden.de/verschiedene-deutschland-karten-bunt-leer-mito hne-bundeslaender-staedte-und-weiteren-details
It is not made easier by the fact that six of them have double names, like Schleswig-Holstein.
I bet many germans would have trouble there.


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America is fifty states. That's a bloody pile of countries, most of which are pretty similar. People there speak the same language (Spanish, sometimes English), they have almost no population, are ridiculously tiny, have no famous cities (Europeans, quick, name one thing that happened in Boulder!), have mostly the same incomprehensible city layout and same big companies, and most significantly, are all full of Americans. It's not surprising, then, that we poor Europeans have a hard time differentiating. If you guys were to put together your countries a bit more, along certain themes, that would make it far easier for us.

No... what annoys us is that you don't even try to understand what is unique about a given European country. For shame!

Silver Crusade

Mr. and Mrs. State are probably my favorites so far, along with Middleshire.

Quote:

Arizona Nevada

Nevada Arizona

:D

Silver Crusade

Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber

Isn't Amurica basically made up of four parts: Texas, California, New York and Florida with some filler in-between?


Quote:
No... what annoys us is that you don't even try to understand what is unique about a given European country. For shame!

They're already together by theme

Northeast= Andoran.
South east= Taldor .... we used to be great!
Texas/west= Alkenstar and cowboys
West Coast= Hippy elves.

And pardon me if we don't need to split the country in half every time we notice our neighbors are a different religion, have a different accent, or call soda pop.*

* except the indians. Then we're taking your land.


Ahhhhhhh... So THAT is how the countries add up. Gotcha.

Now for European geography: Which giant blob is Hungary? And... Andorra is so small it doesn't even show up on a map of Andorra. Liechtenstein, Monaco, the Vatican and San Marino are even smaller. Not to mention the allegiances of various islands...


Pathfinder Adventure Subscriber

A free Götland or death! (You can keep Skåne in exchange for Värmland.)

Shadow Lodge

In seriousness, I imagine the main reason is generally apathy. Most Europeans have little to no interest in the US's individual pieces, seeing us mostly as a semi-unified whole with a few outstanding individuals (TX, CA, FL, NY, etc.) - much the way most of the US sees Europe.

And if you never visit the place, and have no need or necessity to understand the differences in your general everyday life, there's generally little reason to put forth the effort to correct the issue. It's not going to matter in the end.


Wibbly pride!

You know in the brits defence I couldn't name any of the british counties/provinces (how ever they divide their country.) So if they even know where one state is they are doing better than me if the shoe was on the other foot.

I feel the same way about people who speak broken english as a second language (here in the states). Their broken english is still better than my spanish..


Thing is, the US is far more integrated than Europe is, even with seventy years of working toward a political union. There are many assumptions that do not work out even in the same corner of the world if you go to a neighbouring country. And while many systems are roughly familiar, the practical workings are extremely different. Further afield, the differences become truly impressive.

But all in all, yes. It isn't going to matter much to most people.


Ruick wrote:

Wibbly pride!

You know in the brits defence I couldn't name any of the british counties/provinces (how ever they divide their country.) So if they even know where one state is they are doing better than me if the shoe was on the other foot.

You know all those medieval names that keep showing up in Robin Hood and similar stories? Yeah. ALL of them.

Shadow Lodge

Sissyl wrote:
Thing is, the US is far more integrated than Europe is, even with seventy years of working toward a political union.

For now, at least.


Orthos wrote:
Sissyl wrote:
Thing is, the US is far more integrated than Europe is, even with seventy years of working toward a political union.
For now, at least.

For now. Though at the rate anti-EU-sentiment is growing, I would say it's a very real risk that several countries will start opting out, and pretty soon. The union was pushed through in the nineties, and did realtively well, but had no amazing successes either. Since 2001, and particularly since 2008, it seems that every bit of news from the EU is BAD news. Not many could name one single thing the EU has done that practically makes things better for the people in the union. Most of what they have done is things like make sure only straight cucumbers get sold. They have also made quite a few things worse, such as reintroducing mercury products to the market after the lightbulb ban. Add to this outright corruption, such as MEPs selling their votes for big money, and getting caught on camera doing so, and it's no big surprise people aren't exactly seeing the wonder. It shouldn't come as a surprise that not many in Sweden want to join the euro by now - and people all across the EU see that.


Treppa wrote:
I'm impressed with New Hampshire's quiet takeover of Dixie. Never thought they had it in them. Once Utah finishes their expansion into 'No F%@@ing Clue', I predict a major Utah/New Hampshire war.

Bring it, Mormons.

Although, honestly, if Joseph Smith had been enlightened in New Hampshire instead of Vermont (which, of course, is just NH upside down), there probably wouldn't have been any problems.

"Wassat? You want to practice polygamy and communism and you think Jesus hung out with the Indians? Pfft, whatever, dude. Live free or die!!"


What do the people of No F%@@ing Clue think about the Utahn invasion? Anyone know?


SnowJade wrote:
Well, at least you've got an interesting story or two. Mine were all mercenaries, losers fleeing from Scotland in 1745, and maybe a drunk who ended up on the wrong boat (he never told the same story twice).

Perhaps my Scots ancestor came over with your Scots ancestors?

[Starts singing It's a Small World After All]

Dark Archive

Pathfinder Adventure, Adventure Path Subscriber

I knew we had something in common with the Scottish Ancestry. So what Clan are you attached too Doodlebug?

Me I have the Douglas Clan and Cahoon.


Adventure Path Charter Subscriber; Pathfinder Adventure, Lost Omens Subscriber
Doodlebug Anklebiter wrote:


The reasons my Scots and German ancestors were forced to expatriate remains shrouded in mystery and scandal to this day.

Germans and aysteries? Does not go well together IMO. Most Germans left for quite simple reasons: they were piss-poor and/or had not much chance to better their lot, partially due to the quite backward countries that made up Germany then, partially due to the stifling society in place there.

Although there are other reasons sometimes. The parents of the painter Robert Vonnoh had to leave Germany because his father got caught in the aftermath of the German revolutionary attempts of 1848 in Berlin, and had to leave the country, as neither Prussia would have him, nor would his ancestral home of Schwarzburg-Rudolstadt (one of those small backward countries Germany consisted of at that time) take him back. Whats more, his marriage to a prussian woman, while being made legal by the priest conducting the rite, was technically illegal, as his status as foreigner in Prussia was not considered before the marriage - his homeland would have needed to confirm that there were no hindrances to his marriage. He went to England, but Prussian authorities would not let his family leave as well at first. When they finally did, he had to lend some money from the Schwarzburg government to finance the travels - which they actually gave to him, and he had to pay it back. Obviously, they were happy to have him leave.

I (partially) read the file on his case in the archive of Schwarzburg in the Heidecksburg. Sounds like the plot for a movie IMO. I´m probably distantly related to this family, thats why I searched for it.


Gruumash . wrote:

I knew we had something in common with the Scottish Ancestry. So what Clan are you attached too Doodlebug?

The Anklebiters. Duh.

Spoiler:
Srly, though, I have no idea. Everything except for the paisano-ness is on my father's side and he doesn't know (or care) much of anything about his ancestry. I might've made up the story about Old Hampshire.

Not-made-up-story about my mother's side: My grandmother (who's given name is Santa, btw, how awesome is that?) was raised in western Massachusetts and served as a nurse in World War II. While stationed in Britain (Old Hampshire?) she was riding around in the back of a truck with a bunch of other nurses when a charming paratrooper talked his way into getting a lift, which, so the story goes, was against military regulations. Anyway, they got to chatting, and he was a lonely Italian boy from Brooklyn who's family had all died in a tenement fire. By all accounts, my grandfather was a pretty smooth lothario type and I like to imagine that the chatting quickly turned to schtupping. Anyway, they got married and, after the war, went back to western Mass.

Sometime in the 1960s, when my mother, the youngest of three, was in double digits, it came out that not only were my grandfather's family not killed in a tenement fire, not only were they all still happily alive, he also had another wife and children back in Brooklyn. Huge-ass Italian-style drama ensues, but my grandmother takes him back. A couple of years later, he ditches her and starts another family on the other side of town.

Well, karma's a biznitch, and he died alone in a VA hospital and none of his relations attended his funeral. Nobody walks out on the Anklebiters.

Grand Lodge

Pathfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Roleplaying Game Subscriber

My father emigrated to this country after World War 2 as a Displaced Person. To this day, I still have no idea what my mother saw in him.


Stebehil wrote:

But then, fill in the "Bundesländer" here:

http://www.deutsch-werden.de/verschiedene-deutschland-karten-bunt-leer-mito hne-bundeslaender-staedte-und-weiteren-details
It is not made easier by the fact that six of them have double names, like Schleswig-Holstein.
I bet many germans would have trouble there.

Due to all the reading I did not too long ago about 1848, I did pretty well, I think, for a stupid American. The fact that you've got three Saxonies now, and two Rhinelands, threw me for a loop, I labelled Mecklenberg Prussia, and, I must admit, in desperation, I labelled Saarsland (or whatever it is) Alsace-Lorraine.

Anyway, I did much better than I would on a quiz of English counties.


Adventure Path Charter Subscriber; Pathfinder Adventure, Lost Omens Subscriber
Doodlebug Anklebiter wrote:
Stebehil wrote:

But then, fill in the "Bundesländer" here:

http://www.deutsch-werden.de/verschiedene-deutschland-karten-bunt-leer-mito hne-bundeslaender-staedte-und-weiteren-details
It is not made easier by the fact that six of them have double names, like Schleswig-Holstein.
I bet many germans would have trouble there.

Due to all the reading I did not too long ago about 1848, I did pretty well, I think, for a stupid American. The fact that you've got three Saxonies now, and two Rhinelands, threw me for a loop, I labelled Mecklenberg Prussia, and, I must admit, in desperation, I labelled Saarsland (or whatever it is) Alsace-Lorraine.

Anyway, I did much better than I would on a quiz of English counties.

Well, the names got changed quite a bit since 1848 :-)

Bundesländer:

Top: Schleswig-Holstein (bluegreen)
east: Mecklenburg-Vorpommern (light blue)
red blotch on the border: Hamburg
light violet: Niedersachsen (lower Saxony)
red blotch inside former: Bremen
dark green: Sachsen-Anhalt
yellow: Brandenburg
red blotch inside former: Berlin
light green west: Northrhine-Westphalia
light grey: Hessen
light yellow: Thuringia
brown: Saxony
yellow west: Rhineland-Palatinate
dark orange: Saarland
dark violet: Baden-Württemberg
bluegrey: Bavaria


Yeah, well, I'm sure one of your strict Prussian-style pedagogues would have marked Baden for Baden-Wurttemberg incorrect, but I'm still pretty pleased with myself. Of course, I'm a right smug bastard, so...

Belated Rutles link for Spanky.


And then some Bonzos

and then some Blockheads

and then I'm off to the basement to roots through my records.

Sovereign Court

Doodlebug Anklebiter wrote:

No. Yes.

1. Californication.
2. Bath.
3. Old Jersey.
4. I have a feeling that Spanning the Forth Bridge was a song or album title but I can't remember exactly what or by whom.
5. Pissant-on-the-Blighter.

Did you ever deliver my message to Polly Jean?

Rutland used to be part of Leicestershire so this was an easy one.

Bath is down south: the most well-known spa town in the midlands is Royal Leamington Spa.
Wesleyan Garden City would be an obvious answer.
The Firth of Forth, obviously.
St. David's (Tyddewi) is the smallest city in the country.

You score for effort and enthusiasm.

I tried to deliver your message but she was talking about licking her legs and I got distracted...

Honestly, I think the message is that you shouldn't expect foreigners to know details about your country. If I went to the US, I'd like to visit Metropolis and Gotham first.


Doodlebug Anklebiter wrote:


Although, to be fair, I'd hate to see Yanks' attempts to name Britishiznoid counties.

Oh, look, in the very first post...


And now I am off to the basement...


GeraintElberion wrote:
Wesleyan Garden City would be an obvious answer.

I was curious about 'Wesleyan Garden City' and googled it. It kept giving me links to places in the US, which since this thread seems to be about US geography makes sense, I guess... :)

(The most similar place name to 'Weesleyan Garden City' for a major settlement (by UK standards) that we have here in the UK is 'Welwyn Garden City'...)
[humour]I prefer to adopt a policy of remaining figuratively silent and being thought an idiot, rather opening my mouth and removing any doubt as regards my own abilities to identify US States, however...[/humour]


Doodlebug Anklebiter wrote:
SnowJade wrote:
Well, at least you've got an interesting story or two. Mine were all mercenaries, losers fleeing from Scotland in 1745, and maybe a drunk who ended up on the wrong boat (he never told the same story twice).

Perhaps my Scots ancestor came over with your Scots ancestors?

[Starts singing It's a Small World After All]

Could very well be. According to one of the the family stories, a man who called himself Jacobus Glan (anybody care to guess which side his political sympathies were on?) staggered off of a ship in New York in 1746. He married one Anna Catlin, the daughter of a Dutch merchant, and begot 10 children, a couple of whom went on to do truly lousy jobs fighting for their father's adopted country about 30 years later. Another story involves a Hessian who, uh, saw the light and rethought his dedication to the Brits, and wouldn't I just love to know why.

*Starts caterwauling along with Comrade Anklebiter*

@Spanky: I did a classic double-take at "Sunk the Titanic". Thank you for that; I needed the laugh! *Headbonk*


One of my ancestors had to choose between the city I live now, in Sweden, and Baku, in about 1900, for a job. Apart from the obvious reason, the fact that I would not exist if he had chosen... poorly... that was a choice that could have gone MUCH worse. As I understand it, Baku didn't miss much of the worst that the 1900s threw at the world.


[Pauses in between verses]

Where did that ancestor come from, Madame Sissyl?

[Goes back to a big finish for the chorus]

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