Telling somone you dont want another player


Advice


In general that is probibly difficult and interesting, but i have a particular situation right now.

I'm running a game with 3 players and have recently found my fourth player (a player more experienced than me, which is great since i'm a novice at table top RPGs in general). So now i have a nice 4 player party, with one experienced player to keep me right. I've spent time with them all, know thier backstories and know how i will give them all thier moment to shine in a given session or over a campaign.

Just now my housemate was like "oh yeah can i play with you guys on sunday?"

I dont think she really gets how much you have to put into making a character and roleplaying and stuff... i think she thinks its like joining a game of manopoly... On top of that i think i'm gonna struggle to juggle a party of 5 potench.

Anyways wondered if anyone had any advice?


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I would suggest setting her down with the Core book on a day before the game and trying to help her create a character. By explaining the character creation process it should give her a big clue as to how complicated the game can be. This will either make her more interested or turn her off from the game entirely. When my wife wanted to join a game I jumped at the opportunity and tried to set down with her to create a character. It took all of 10 minutes before she realized how out of her element this game was and she has never asked to join a game since (That being about 10 years). If your roomate does get more interested then dont get discouraged. This can be a positive thing. One it gives you and your roomate a common hobby. Another positive point is the rarity of female gamers in pen and paper. Having a female perspective when it comes to RP and adventure can be a great boon for any game.

I wouldn't turn her away. New gamers are a good thing. Its easier then you think to run 5 players vs 4. Its when you get to 6+ players that the game starts to break down. I would try it out and see what happens.


I don't think you'll find 5 more difficult than 4. That...and players come and go. Odds are, you may be back down to 4 at some point.

Bumping up to six would require a bit more encounter balancing, but I think you'll be okay.

If your player is interested, I think you'd be doing yourself a disservice if you discourage their interest.

Liberty's Edge

Honestly, it is not that difficult to go from 4 to 5 players for the GM. Give her a simple pregen or NPC and see how she handles it. Maybe she will actually develop a true love for the hobby ;-)

Do not however put too much importance on her character staying with the party. This way, if she stops playing after the first session, you can get rid of her character without endangering your whole game


Well, be straight forward and honest. Tell her that you don't think your prepared or skilled enough to handle a larger party, and that your afraid she doesn't understand the commitment and work that can be participating in table top.

But, tell her that you'll keep her in mind for the next game you all play where (maybe) the GM will have more experience and can handle additional players.

Other than that theres not much to be said. As a GM and depending on your skill level is very valid to say "Sorry, not right now we have exactly the right number of players."

Dark Archive

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Or, you could say yes instead, thereby adding another player to the Pathfinder collective.


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Four - is a good basic number of players.

Five - is even better; if one player can't make it, you can still play.

Six - works okay.

Any more than that and things tend to get bogged down during combat.

So ... it's your game, but in your shoes I'd help her roll up a character and let her join.


Or run a solo-game for her. That'll teach her the basics. Not as much system-wise, but more to give her an idea of what roleplaying is all about.


hmmm all good suggestions.

I've sent her a facebook message saying that if she has between 1 and 2 hours tomorrow then il'l sit down and make a character with her, and that she'll need to have a think about what kind of person her character is, and why they are a travelling adventurer

I figure that will either make her go "hang on... this isn't like monopoly?" or she'll take the bull by the horns, in which case i'll try to make sure she dosn't get thrown off.

hehe you say the rarity of female gamers but mate she'll be our groups second lady, and i've played with more girls than guys :P


oh i've also told my players what the score is regards that she might be joining us


You know, the best thing to do is hand her a pregen and encourage your players to help her learn the game.

But, if your group's style of play is very serious and on-task, maybe you need to explain that your game is a commitment on the level of a book club, where everyone has some individual homework to be done before you all get together to discuss it.


I have had people interested in learning Pathfinder and joining my game. I tend to invite them to come and watch for one session to see how it's played- or at least how I play it. Then, as I'm a sandboxer, I get them to come for a second session, pick one of the NPCs to roll for and follow the character sheets, skills and feats and so on.

If after that they still want to play, I'll pregen some basic character builds based on their preferred play styles, and then together we can adapt and personalise it.

My game has 7 players currently, just dropped from 8, and it can be challenging. Sometimes we may only get 20 minutes of in game time in a 2 and a half hour session, especially when they decide to all split up and game independently. If your party stay together and follow adventure paths rather than sandbox though it is manageable. And as others have said, it means you can still play effectively even if someone can't make it.

If the person is your housemate, and you're running the game in your house, it's bad form to exclude them unless you think they will be disruptive


In an interesting conclusion ; i gave her one of the pregens in thr beginner box and said she could have a go for a session and then decide what she wants to do. She loved it; and although it is more challenging cause i like to give all my players thier moment to shine, i managed well and ended up running one of the best games of my (thus far limited carrier).

I did use some of the other advice here though, because now my housemate's friend, who i genuinely can't stand, wants to play too. I (legitimately) explained that im not sure i coukd handle mkre players just yet but id keep here in mind if i was lookimg for anyone.


GureiKun wrote:

In an interesting conclusion ; i gave her one of the pregens in thr beginner box and said she could have a go for a session and then decide what she wants to do. She loved it; and although it is more challenging cause i like to give all my players thier moment to shine, i managed well and ended up running one of the best games of my (thus far limited carrier).

I did use some of the other advice here though, because now my housemate's friend, who i genuinely can't stand, wants to play too. I (legitimately) explained that im not sure i coukd handle mkre players just yet but id keep here in mind if i was lookimg for anyone.

You could always point this person in the direction of a FLGS. If they are interested in PF and it's available the Society is always looking for new recruits.

Shadow Lodge

Do you actually not want a 5th player, or do you not want her to play in your game?

If it's the latter, you're misleading her by showing her how to create a character if you're only going to say "actually I'd rather you didn't play in this game" later.

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