To be clear i'm not complaining. It may appear that way, but I'm legitimately astounded at my own lack of motivation. The purpose of this thread is to get some ideas about how other people overcame such things and incorporate some version of that into my life.
Problem:
I find it difficult to motivate myself lately, though i've had periods like this before. My question is have any of you had the time, energy, and ability to better yourselves in some way but for no obvious reason just completely lacked motivation to do so? If yes, how did you motivate yourself? I know I should, I know I need to, I even want to, but for some reason I am having a hard time making myself.
Some personal details:
I'm not depressed or anything like it. There's room for improvement, but I generally like my life and am quite happy. I'm not overly worried about anything. Though I have a ton of debt that causes me stress i'm dealing with it progressively. I have a good job that occasionally lends me a lot of free time. Right now, for example I'm working from home, but I have no specific tasks to complete so it's basically free time.
Unfinished tasks:
I want to do the below, but I hard time making myself do them because of lack of motivation.
- I've been teaching myself the basics of programming with the long term goal of being able to program an app that i've got in my head. In theory this could fix my relatively minor financial issues.
- Gym. I'm a fit guy (6'1'' 195 lbs mostly muscle) and I know I need to go to the gym to improve/maintain, but I get bored.
- Portuguese. I'm learning Portuguese. My husband is from Brazil and his mother may be moving in with us soon. I'm good with her living with us. I like her and she'll have her own space. She speaks english, but not very well. I'll need to learn Portuguese to better communicate with her. Plus there are good neurological reasons to to be bilingual. Also it makes you look smarter. Also if I can get fluent it could be very helpful for my job. Basically it's a good thing all around.
Anyway, if anyone has any good tips/tricks to motivate oneself I'd appreciate hearing them. Thank you, Paizonians.
When you actually do the things you want to do, do you get into a flow?
If yes, then my advice is: Don't overthink it - and just do it.
Its easy to be caught up in a catch 22 which goes like this: You realize you procrastinate. So instead of actually doing what you want to do, you analyze why you don't do enough, do research about how to motivate yourself, and plan how you will do what you want to do tomorrow. But tomorrow you realize you haven't done anything today, so you analyze your situation even harder - and start asking yourself why you can't bring yourself to do the very things you want to do.
There is this advice that goes something like: you will find love only when you are no longer looking so hard for it. I believe that advice applies to hobbies as well.
I watched this a bunch when I was in a really f+~%ed up place a few years ago.
It helped me a lot.
Never give up until your very last breath. Just like that little f+%$ing zebra.
Here are some tips that I've found useful in the past:
1) Make sure you get enough sleep and eat right. It sounds like you are fairly healthy, but if your diet or sleep schedule has been suffering recently, that could be a large reason for your lack of motivation.
2) Shape your environment. A lot of the times what I thought was lack of motivation was just wanting to do other stuff *more.* For example, I'd want to read other books so often I wouldn't get my school reading done. By having a friend or my girlfriend hide or keep the books I wanted to read, I was able to focus on my school reading better. Eventually, I was able to get those books back and handle it better after I got in the habit of reading what I needed to.
3) This one doesn't work for everyone (myself included), but sometimes it can be beneficial to have an "accountability partner." Someone who helps you keep on track, asks how you've been doing, and tries to motivate you. If you can find someone who has the same/similar goals, then this works better.
Good luck! Hope this helped :)
Oh, and it often helps to make a goal into a game. Here is a cool site that teaches you how to code with a point system to encourage you. You can try to adopt a similar method in other goals by giving yourself small rewards as you progress. Here is the site: Codecademy
Hope this helps as well!
Some thoughts:
1) Think about why you want to do these things and the stepping stones to completing them. Is it something you really want to do?
2) What specifically is getting in the way of finishing them. Is it a lot of hours spent on tumblr, facebook, etc.? I know plenty of people that have problems with the oceans of the internet when it comes to completing their work, especially when a good deal of it requires being on the computer.
My advice for the latter problem is to find as many ways as possible to work toward these goals away from the computer, completely in your own thoughts, no distractions. When I'm feeling unmotivated on a piece (I'm studying Illustration, primarily digital painting), I shut my laptop, make some tea, and sit on the couch with my thoughts for a bit, maybe with some lyricless music, thinking about what I need to accomplish, why I need to accomplish it, how I can accomplish it, and how long it will take.
Get help. Not in a psychological way just someone to motivate you.
Like going to the gym together or have your husband speak portugese to you. Things like that.
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As an adult with ADD, low motivation is a common issue I have to deal with in myself a lot.
Things I do to help myself get past it:
- Set up reward systems. If I do the dishes, then I get 20 minutes video game time. If I finish going through my box of crap that needs sorting, I get buy myself a Doctor Who DVD. Etc. (This last I just thought of and it goes into affect immediately.... :) )
- Ask people to help me or keep an eye on me. One time I really needed to clean out my kitchen, throw away stuff I wasn't using any more, organize my shelves, etc. This was a lot of routine stuff that I'd easily distract myself in the process of doing, so I had a friend come over to be with me while I did it. I just needed him to chat with me and remind me what I was supposed to be working on, and it really helped me get it done and much faster than had I been alone. With some of the things you want to do -- it strikes me in particular with the learn Portuguese goal, if you ask your husband to help you out, this not only helps you achieve what you want but it should be fun time spent with your spouse. With the programming, maybe seek out some like-minded people and form a group around app creation?
- Generally just try to structure time. This is hard because I NEED structure but I simultaneously by my own nature want to reject it. But even just guidelines like, "Monday is laundry night, Tuesday is grocery shopping night, Wednesday is writing or Rosetta Stone night..." can help me be mindful of what I SHOULD be doing, not just what I WANT to be doing at that moment.
- Really bear in mind the results of what it is you want/need to do. Throw up post it notes and lists of why it is important to you to accomplish the things you want to accomplish. Don't just constantly remind yourself of the things you need to complete, remind yourself of the rewards that are awaiting you once you finish.
- Turn stuff into a game. Or get apps/devices/tools that help make them into a game. I am hell about getting myself to exercise, but I downloaded Zombies Run on my phone and suddenly I am chomping at the bit to go out and power-walk/jog (I am NOT fit so that's about as extreme cardio as I can accomplish at the moment), not because I want to exercise but because I want to play the Zombies Run game. The fact that the "game" is me power walking/jogging while listening to a story about zombies works just great.
- In the wise words of My Drunk Kitchen mistress Hannah Hart, make yourself a "To Done" list. While you may keep a to do list, also write down the stuff you accomplish on a separate list. When you acknowledge the stuff you actually get done, it makes it much more gratifying and helps you realize how much you are really capable of accomplishing, which then provides additional mental energy to keep going with the other stuff you need to do.
I didn't read the details, but have some observations for you (and maybe for myself as I write them out). Motivation or the zone is difficult for me to coax out. I enjoy it most when I'm at work, and conversely dislike it the most when it isn't present at the office. Getting regular sleep helps. I find that i'm more productive towards the end of the week, and like today on monday, i drag. I theorize that I set up frame during the week by making an effort to work and wipe it out on the weekends, gaming and socializing. By the end of the weekend, I'm in the zone gaming (cards, d&d, whatever), but I need a different frame for work. It may help if there was some overlap between them (friends at both), but for now they're rather distinct. It sounds like you have help from your partner, and that's great. I would just try to make an effort daily at your task and hope that the frame takes over, you get into the zone, and don't realize that you're making an effort to do something. good luck.
This might be a little specialized but... I don't let myself go to sleep at night unless I've written something.
It doesn't matter what it is or that I've never sold anything. If this is ever going to be anything more than a hobby I need to write. Every day. And if I don't, I'm not allowed to sleep that night.
I have major clinical depression and my motivation, while being very low the last 6 years, does ebb and flow. The last several months have been very, very low. I have a zabillion great ideas, but can't even force myself to lift a pen to write down the notes sometimes. I'm still looking for a motivating factor.
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TCG, you sound a lot like me in a variety of ways.
I find that the pace of my day is set at the beginning, and rarely changes from then on. In other words, if I sleep in on a Saturday morning, laze about over my coffee while surfing the web, and take a shower at noon, my day is f%*%ed - even in the afternoon I won't get anything done. If I rush myself out of the house (not getting up TOO early, mind you) and get a single task done immediately, the rest of my day will unfold likewise.
My advice? On the days off (or the less-busy days), make yourself tackle some task, no matter how small, first thing in the morning, and it will encourage you for the rest of the day.