>>Blame *Cosmo* for ALL your problems here<<


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Selene Spires wrote:
Ambrosia Slaad wrote:

There's only three of us in the household, so we often can't finish a gallon of milk before the expiration date. Usually, this means I'll pick up a fresh gallon when the old one hits the expiration date.

I blame Cosmo that after I pick up a fresh gallon, I can't convince my dad to stop drinking the expired milk. I don't care that the expired milk doesn't taste off yet. The new milk is slowly ticking towards its future expiration date; while he's drinking expired milk now, there will be that much more milk left in the newer gallon when its expiration date arrives.

I also blame Cosmo that throwing out the expired milk makes Dad grumpy.

I also also blame Cosmo that Dad bypassing the fresh milk to drink expired milk drives me nuts.

Why not get a smaller container of milk?

You and your sensible solutions!


4 people marked this as a favorite.
Freehold DM wrote:
Selene Spires wrote:
Ambrosia Slaad wrote:

There's only three of us in the household, so we often can't finish a gallon of milk before the expiration date. Usually, this means I'll pick up a fresh gallon when the old one hits the expiration date.

I blame Cosmo that after I pick up a fresh gallon, I can't convince my dad to stop drinking the expired milk. I don't care that the expired milk doesn't taste off yet. The new milk is slowly ticking towards its future expiration date; while he's drinking expired milk now, there will be that much more milk left in the newer gallon when its expiration date arrives.

I also blame Cosmo that throwing out the expired milk makes Dad grumpy.

I also also blame Cosmo that Dad bypassing the fresh milk to drink expired milk drives me nuts.

Why not get a smaller container of milk?
You and your sensible solutions!

I tried that. As of this afternoon, we have less than a quarter of milk in the gallon jug that expired Sept. 9th. The newer jug I bought was a half-gallon, which has now also expired on Sept. 19th. Dad is still drinking from the 9/9 jug. Normally even the 9/9 jug would have been used up by now, but the day I bought it, Mom abruptly announced she wasn't going to drink milk anymore because it made her phlegmy.

ლ(ಠ益ಠ)ლ Y U do dis, Cosmo?!


If you lived in Wisconsin you could drink it straight from the cow's teet.


Ambrosia Slaad wrote:
Freehold DM wrote:
Selene Spires wrote:
Ambrosia Slaad wrote:

There's only three of us in the household, so we often can't finish a gallon of milk before the expiration date. Usually, this means I'll pick up a fresh gallon when the old one hits the expiration date.

I blame Cosmo that after I pick up a fresh gallon, I can't convince my dad to stop drinking the expired milk. I don't care that the expired milk doesn't taste off yet. The new milk is slowly ticking towards its future expiration date; while he's drinking expired milk now, there will be that much more milk left in the newer gallon when its expiration date arrives.

I also blame Cosmo that throwing out the expired milk makes Dad grumpy.

I also also blame Cosmo that Dad bypassing the fresh milk to drink expired milk drives me nuts.

Why not get a smaller container of milk?
You and your sensible solutions!

I tried that. As of this afternoon, we have less than a quarter of milk in the gallon jug that expired Sept. 9th. The newer jug I bought was a half-gallon, which has now also expired on Sept. 19th. Dad is still drinking from the 9/9 jug. Normally even the 9/9 jug would have been used up by now, but the day I bought it, Mom abruptly announced she wasn't going to drink milk anymore because it made her phlegmy.

ლ(ಠ益ಠ)ლ Y U do dis, Cosmo?!

maybe it's time to start baking?


Cap'n Yesterday, FaWtL Tourism wrote:
If you lived in Wisconsin you could drink it straight from the cow's teet.

leaps out of nearest window, runs towards Wisconsin


2 people marked this as a favorite.
Freehold DM wrote:
Ambrosia Slaad wrote:

I tried that. As of this afternoon, we have less than a quarter of milk in the gallon jug that expired Sept. 9th. The newer jug I bought was a half-gallon, which has now also expired on Sept. 19th. Dad is still drinking from the 9/9 jug. Normally even the 9/9 jug would have been used up by now, but the day I bought it, Mom abruptly announced she wasn't going to drink milk anymore because it made her phlegmy.

ლ(ಠ益ಠ)ლ Y U do dis, Cosmo?!

maybe it's time to start baking?

I also tried that yesterday:

Me: "Would you like me to make some blueberry muffins?"
Mom: "Would you be putting milk in them?"
Me: "Just a little, a 1/3 cup."
Mom: "No, milk makes me phlegmy."
Me: "Well, that eliminates making chocolate pudding too."

Dad volunteered to eat the pudding. I got Mom almond milk yesterday for her cereal, and she still takes her daily calcium citrate + D3, so she's still getting her RDA.

I blame Cosmo that it took me this long to give up on the damn milk.


1 person marked this as a favorite.

I blame Cosmo for the fact I had to put back some cleaning supplies that I could have used to make the house smell nicer. But at least I kept the carpet cleaner!


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I Blame Cosmo for my nasty cold. Plus upcoming jury duty. It is NOT a fun combination!

Curse you, Cosmo!!!

RPG Superstar 2015 Top 8

7 people marked this as a favorite.
Ambrosia Slaad wrote:
Freehold DM wrote:
Selene Spires wrote:
Ambrosia Slaad wrote:

There's only three of us in the household, so we often can't finish a gallon of milk before the expiration date. Usually, this means I'll pick up a fresh gallon when the old one hits the expiration date.

I blame Cosmo that after I pick up a fresh gallon, I can't convince my dad to stop drinking the expired milk. I don't care that the expired milk doesn't taste off yet. The new milk is slowly ticking towards its future expiration date; while he's drinking expired milk now, there will be that much more milk left in the newer gallon when its expiration date arrives.

I also blame Cosmo that throwing out the expired milk makes Dad grumpy.

I also also blame Cosmo that Dad bypassing the fresh milk to drink expired milk drives me nuts.

Why not get a smaller container of milk?
You and your sensible solutions!

I tried that. As of this afternoon, we have less than a quarter of milk in the gallon jug that expired Sept. 9th. The newer jug I bought was a half-gallon, which has now also expired on Sept. 19th. Dad is still drinking from the 9/9 jug. Normally even the 9/9 jug would have been used up by now, but the day I bought it, Mom abruptly announced she wasn't going to drink milk anymore because it made her phlegmy.

ლ(ಠ益ಠ)ლ Y U do dis, Cosmo?!

PedantQuaker unbidden comes along to point out, which apologies in advance for pedantry:

1) Milk is marked with a sell by date. Milk's sell by date is just that. It is the date by which the milk should be *sold*. It should not be confused with a *use by* date, which is the date by which a foodstuff should be consumed. A sell by date indicates milk (or any other product with a sell by date) is still good for at least one week past the date stamped upon it.
2) Sorry, but Dad is right. Milk is a product where if it tastes fine, it is fine. There is no secret evil usually developing within it that is undetectable.
3) Spoiled milk is in fact mostly harmless (unless it's actually MOLDY--like you can see blue/green stuff in it--in which case it absolutely must be discarded). It can make some, but not most, people's stomach temporarily, mildly upset due to the sugar breakdown, and the smell/taste is of course unpleasant to most (people who say spoiled milk made them sick is due to the gag reflex being triggered due to the smell). But the lactobacillus that cause the icky smell/taste/curdling won't hurt you in a disease-causing sense--they are the same bacteria that participate, sometimes among others, in making cheese (spoiled milk is really just pre-cheese that has been poorly controlled for flavor). While no one usually wants to drink spoiled milk because it tastes bad, it will not give you foodborne illness.
4) Spoiled milk is excellent for cooking and baking, and can be used as a substitute for buttermilk (which is a similar product without the curd in it, because the curd has been turned into butter) in any recipe that calls for it. It makes great pancakes and biscuits among other things.
5) Switching to almond milk is great, but the chocolate pudding it makes isn't as good.

I blame Cosmo for making me pedantic, and making me research food shelf life for this book I'm working on.


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Pathfinder Adventure Path, Rulebook, Starfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Roleplaying Game, Starfinder Society Subscriber

Thank you, Cosmo!

For sending the 50s Prison Jesuses to the Feng Shui Hole and not us.

RPG Superstar 2015 Top 8

1 person marked this as a favorite.

Oh, also, I blame Cosmo for the $1,200 of car repairs I had to get and that it's still in the shop because the effing check engine light won't shut off. The car *knows* I was starting to think about replacing it within the year (because Cosmo told it, obviously) and it decided to rebel before I could actually get anywhere close to having time to look for a new one.

ETA: it's also totally Cosmo's fault and not mine that I also managed to scrape the fender on the loaner vehicle the mechanic gave me to get to a doctor's appointment so I now also get to pay for repairing a car that isn't mine.

And also I have upcoming jury duty too. That I don't mind as much.


Ambrosia Slaad wrote:
Freehold DM wrote:
Selene Spires wrote:
Ambrosia Slaad wrote:

There's only three of us in the household, so we often can't finish a gallon of milk before the expiration date. Usually, this means I'll pick up a fresh gallon when the old one hits the expiration date.

I blame Cosmo that after I pick up a fresh gallon, I can't convince my dad to stop drinking the expired milk. I don't care that the expired milk doesn't taste off yet. The new milk is slowly ticking towards its future expiration date; while he's drinking expired milk now, there will be that much more milk left in the newer gallon when its expiration date arrives.

I also blame Cosmo that throwing out the expired milk makes Dad grumpy.

I also also blame Cosmo that Dad bypassing the fresh milk to drink expired milk drives me nuts.

Why not get a smaller container of milk?
You and your sensible solutions!

I tried that. As of this afternoon, we have less than a quarter of milk in the gallon jug that expired Sept. 9th. The newer jug I bought was a half-gallon, which has now also expired on Sept. 19th. Dad is still drinking from the 9/9 jug. Normally even the 9/9 jug would have been used up by now, but the day I bought it, Mom abruptly announced she wasn't going to drink milk anymore because it made her phlegmy.

ლ(ಠ益ಠ)ლ Y U do dis, Cosmo?!

Lactose intolerence?

RPG Superstar 2015 Top 8

4 people marked this as a favorite.
DeathQuaker wrote:
Milk is a product where if it tastes fine, it is fine.

I should add to all of the above "if pasteurized and not tampered with." Raw milk has its fans, but there is a reason we started pasteurizing milk and having it FDA approved, and it wasn't just to ruin the fun for weird hipster foodies.


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DeathQuaker wrote:
DeathQuaker wrote:
Milk is a product where if it tastes fine, it is fine.
I should add to all of the above "if pasteurized and not tampered with." Raw milk has its fans, but there is a reason we started pasteurizing milk and having it FDA approved, and it wasn't just to ruin the fun for weird hipster foodies.

Next you're going to tell me that vaccinations aren't a government conspiracy designed to keep us docile...

...and I blame Cosmo that I hit "Submit Post" instead of "Cancel"!


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Pathfinder Battles Case Subscriber; Pathfinder Companion, Maps, Pathfinder Accessories, Pawns, Starfinder Society Subscriber; Pathfinder Roleplaying Game Superscriber
DeathQuaker wrote:
DeathQuaker wrote:
Milk is a product where if it tastes fine, it is fine.
I should add to all of the above "if pasteurized and not tampered with." Raw milk has its fans, but there is a reason we started pasteurizing milk and having it FDA approved, and it wasn't just to ruin the fun for weird hipster foodies.

I Blame Cosmo that it wasn't just to ruin the fun for weird hipster foodies.


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DeathQuaker wrote:
2) Sorry, but Dad is right. Milk is a product where if it tastes fine, it is fine. There is no secret evil usually developing within it that is undetectable.

That's what the budding villain wants you to think.


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Pontiff Rysky, of Cult of Cosmo wrote:
DeathQuaker wrote:
2) Sorry, but Dad is right. Milk is a product where if it tastes fine, it is fine. There is no secret evil usually developing within it that is undetectable.
That's what the budding villain wants you to think.

Am henchman, can confirm.

RPG Superstar 2015 Top 8

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I blame Cosmo for having all of my secret evil milk plans revealed on this thread.


I dunno if milk is evil...I mean how else am I going to get cheese curds?


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I blame Cosmo that I can't buy DeathQuaker's Secret Evil Milk in the store.

I also blame Cosmo that I have to go grocery shopping tomorrow morning.

Silver Crusade

Pathfinder Companion, Starfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Roleplaying Game, Starfinder Society Subscriber; Pathfinder Roleplaying Game Superscriber

Buy tortillas, pepperonis, and preferred cheese mix and make armies of pizzas?


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I Blame Cosmo for the travails I experienced on the way home from game both on Friday night and Saturday night...

Friday night I used a map app and was continuously directed to closed roads. Those who don't better would probably figure because it was late at night the app was not getting enough info from other users to update route info...I know better it was Cosmo's doing.

Than on Sat on the way home I decided not to use it...and due not having it on to remind and being distracted by conversation with my passenger I mixed my exit and ended up in another state. Of course Cosmo caused my passenger to be distracting to cause me to miss my exit.

Thanks Cosmo! :(


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Selene Spires wrote:

I Blame Cosmo for the travails I experienced on the way home from game both on Friday night and Saturday night...

Friday night I used a map app and was continuously directed to closed roads. Those who don't better would probably figure because it was late at night the app was not getting enough info from other users to update route info...I know better it was Cosmo's doing.

Than on Sat on the way home I decided not to use it...and due not having it on to remind and being distracted by conversation with my passenger I mixed my exit and ended up in another state. Of course Cosmo caused my passenger to be distracting to cause me to miss my exit.

Thanks Cosmo! :(

I blame Cosmo that West Coasters just don't understand East Coast geography.

The closest border to me is 180 miles away. That's one heck of a missed exit!

Bonus Trivia: The farthest border from me is just a skosh over 500 miles, so borders just aren't things we think about around here...


I would blame Cosmo for almost missing the exit getting back home...but honestly I'd rather blame PenDot! *shakes his fist* They a truly a force of disorder, chaos and probably evil.


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We've had over two weeks go by without anyone blaming Cosmo for obvious fault. Cosmo has been lazy, and I blame the lack of blame on Cosmo.


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Vanykrye wrote:
We've had over two weeks go by without anyone blaming Cosmo for obvious fault. Cosmo has been lazy, and I blame the lack of blame on Cosmo.

Do not erroneously confuse the lack of observable phenomena as the lack of malevolent machinations. He Who Must Be Blamed works wheels within wheels within wheels; it's turtles Cosmo all the way down, man.

I blame Cosmo that you had to be reminded of this.

I also blame Cosmo that this whole line of inquiry has brought us both to Cosmo's attention, and now we're both just too tall dandelions waiting obliviously for The Mowing Yet To Come.


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I blame Cosmo that those with good reasons to blame Cosmo aren't able to for one reason or 13 others.


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All of the talk about gallons of milk reminds me - I blame Cosmo for the travesty that is the imperial system of measurements still being in use.


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I blame Cosmo for breaking my glasses a few days ago.


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I blame Cosmo that as constantly uptight as I am, I still haven't crushed that stick up my butt into a diamond or something.


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Tender Tendrils wrote:
All of the talk about gallons of milk reminds me - I blame Cosmo for the travesty that is the imperial system of measurements still being in use.

Just drink your blue milk and keep your anti-Imperial comments to yourself, citizen.

I got a HWK-290 light freighter that'll be leaving Mos Espa in 19 hours if you need a seat. Half payment down before takeoff.

Dark Archive

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I came home from work Friday morning and there was frost on the windshield. Winter is coming, indeed. Entering my computer room, I found that my roommate had left the air conditioner on...

It's Cosmo's fault that my roommate is a yeti.


Pathfinder Adventure Path, Rulebook, Starfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Roleplaying Game, Starfinder Society Subscriber
Set wrote:

I came home from work Friday morning and there was frost on the windshield. Winter is coming, indeed. Entering my computer room, I found that my roommate had left the air conditioner on...

It's Cosmo's fault that my roommate is a yeti.

We've gotten a foot and a half of snow since Halloween.

I'm pretty sure winter is here.


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I blame Cosmo that we haven't gotten a foot and a half of snow since Halloween, 1968... cumulative... in fact, you might be able to change that to 1868 and it still might not add up to a foot and a half...


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NobodysHome wrote:
I blame Cosmo that we haven't gotten a foot and a half of snow since Halloween, 1968... cumulative... in fact, you might be able to change that to 1868 and it still might not add up to a foot and a half...

You probably don't want to see our forecast for the next week then.

It's about the same.


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Pathfinder Adventure Path, Rulebook, Starfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Roleplaying Game, Starfinder Society Subscriber

Just to be clear, I'm not complaining, every time it snows I make at least $300, but I earn that money, every penny.


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I blame Cosmo for the fact that I live in the Abyss Australia and that it means its just so damn hot lately.


Paizo Superscriber; Pathfinder Companion, Pathfinder Accessories, Starfinder Accessories, Starfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Roleplaying Game, Starfinder Society Subscriber

Summer is a' comin' in.

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