The Mill Is Closed, There Is No More Work; We Are Destitute ...


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I have no option but to sell some of you for scientific experiments.

Sales thus far:
(Please form a line to the left, they will be here for you shortly.)

Samnell - $1200 - Intel brain-bug division
Yellow Dingo - $40K - Biological warefare department(s)
Tiny Coffee Golem - $75 - Ballistic defense systems
A highly regarded expert - $14.75 - CIA spook tank
meatrace - $1600.03 - Cyborg development
Comrade Anklebiter - $33 - Afterlife combat developemnt
Artanthos - $100 - Communication Logistics
Spanky the Leprechaun - $1,000,000 - WarpDrive Testing

.


2 people marked this as a favorite.
Grand Magus wrote:

.

I have no option but to sell some of you for scientific experiments.

Sales thus far:
(Please form a line to the left, they will be here for you shortly.)

Samnell - $1200 - Intel brain-bug division
Yellow Dingo - $40K - Biological warefare department(s)
Tiny Coffee Golem - $75 - Ballistic defense systems
A highly regarded expert - $14.75 - CIA spook tank
meatrace - $1600.03 - Cyborg development
Comrade Anklebiter - $33 - Afterlife combat developemnt
Artanthos - $100 - Communication Logistics
Spanky the Leprechaun - $1,000,000 - WarpDrive Testing

.

Only $33?!?

That's it, Magus. From here on in, between me and you there is nothing but a fistful of hate!


1 person marked this as a favorite.
Comrade Anklebiter wrote:


Only $33?!?

That's it, Magus. From here on in, between me and you there is nothing but a fistful of hate!

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Hey, I asked for $40,000,000 but their top bid was 33 bucks. Don't kill the messenger.

Can you sing and dance? Mayhap I can squeeze them for a bit more.

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Silver Crusade

2 people marked this as a favorite.

I'll offer you $75 for the goblin.


1 person marked this as a favorite.

Of course I can sing and dance, I'm a frickin' goblin!

No wonder your mill is going out of business.

[Leads plant occupation sitdown]


Pffft. Goes to show I didn't even get sold. People don't appreciate the crossover field between entomobiology and prosthetics.


I'll pay you 80$ for Tiny Coffee Golem if you can make him also deliver tea.


Tiny tea golem?


I'll pay $100 cash moneys for DBAB.
Also: cyborg? Sweeeeeeet!

Sovereign Court

2 people marked this as a favorite.

I bump it up to $100 on Comrade Anklebiter just to see how he reacts to being the object of unbridled capitalism.


I love it, I love it!!

Hmm, what else should you know about me?

Ladies, I can recite French poetry, compliment your eyes and move in an "o"!

Dudes, uh, unexplored territory, but I'm sure we can work something out!


So I should assume this means I'm either priceless or worthless... fantastic, you've just sparked all-out kumite between my irresistible egomaniacal and immovable self-doubting sides.

Silver Crusade

2 people marked this as a favorite.

Fine. $110.

Don Juan de Doodlebug wrote:

Dudes, uh, unexplored territory, but I'm sure we can work something out!

For $110, you'd better work something out.

Sovereign Court

That's OK, AS, join the rest of us in the Bargain Bin.

Oh and $150 for the goblin ... how do you feel about walking a pack of five dogs, comrade? ;)


1 person marked this as a favorite.

{confused, reloads page} For a second, I thought I'd clicked onto another gHarmony bachelor auction. I'll bid $151.43 plus a 6.7 kg ball of ABC gum and a Very Fine copy of Yellowdingo Howls Bach LP for Doodlebug.

Liberty's Edge

Don Juan de Doodlebug wrote:

I love it, I love it!!

Hmm, what else should you know about me?

Ladies, I can recite French poetry, compliment your eyes and move in an "o"!

OOOOOHHHH !!!! So CUTE ! Can I keep you ?


That's it folks. I don't think we can accept any more bids. Sold to the little lady for $151.43! plus a bunch of other stuff

edit: <sigh> so much for a Groundhog's Day homage ...</sigh> I wonder if Bill Murray would be flattered that his character was played by a communist, pyromaniac, pirouetting goblin?


Okay I bump it up to 200.00.

My master needs another cashier for his liquor store.

Doodlebug good news you are going to get your old job back.

Sovereign Court

I'll spot you $5 for TOZ.

Sovereign Court

$250 ... but you have to wear a tuxedo and not bite the guests ... or set them on fire ... or stab them ...


2 people marked this as a favorite.

I bid $500,000 for that bugleyman chap. Smart, handsome fellow.

The Exchange

Comrade Anklebiter wrote:
Grand Magus wrote:

.

I have no option but to sell some of you for scientific experiments.

Sales thus far:
(Please form a line to the left, they will be here for you shortly.)

Samnell - $1200 - Intel brain-bug division
Yellow Dingo - $40K - Biological warefare department(s)
Tiny Coffee Golem - $75 - Ballistic defense systems
A highly regarded expert - $14.75 - CIA spook tank
meatrace - $1600.03 - Cyborg development
Comrade Anklebiter - $33 - Afterlife combat developemnt
Artanthos - $100 - Communication Logistics
Spanky the Leprechaun - $1,000,000 - WarpDrive Testing

.

Only $33?!?

That's it, Magus. From here on in, between me and you there is nothing but a fistful of hate!

I think the hope was a fist full of dollars...

Silver Crusade

2 people marked this as a favorite.

$250?! Bah. Goblin hustlers are dime-a-dozen. No way am I ponying up that kind of cash for something that will just do it in the street anyway.

The Exchange

1 person marked this as a favorite.
Pillbug Toenibbler wrote:

{confused, reloads page} For a second, I thought I'd clicked onto another gHarmony bachelor auction. I'll bid $151.43 plus a 6.7 kg ball of ABC gum and a Very Fine copy of Yellowdingo Howls Bach LP for Doodlebug.

Keep an eye out for my only copy of yellowdingo writes unfinished star trek fanfic.


251.00 for the Doodlebug Anklebiter.

Dark Archive

Trouble at Mill.


yellowdingo wrote:
Pillbug Toenibbler wrote:

{confused, reloads page} For a second, I thought I'd clicked onto another gHarmony bachelor auction. I'll bid $151.43 plus a 6.7 kg ball of ABC gum and a Very Fine copy of Yellowdingo Howls Bach LP for Doodlebug.

Keep an eye out for my only copy of yellowdingo writes unfinished star trek fanfic.

Whatever you do, don't let Pat Boone or The Shat! cover your music. Ruins it.


Don Juan de Doodlebug wrote:


Dudes, uh, unexplored territory, but I'm sure we can work something out!

C'mon o'here and we'll give yer unexplored territory a workout.

ba-da-bing!

Sczarni RPG Superstar Season 9 Top 16, RPG Superstar 2015 Top 32

Now I wonder what I would go for on the open market. Funds are getting a bit tight...


WE OFFER 2 DOLLAR FOR COMRADE ANKLEBITER!

YES! GNOMUNIST REGIME THINK HE WORTH ONLY 2 DOLLAR

HA HA

SEE HOW WE OFFER LITTLE MONEY FOR GOBLIN? BECAUSE GOBLIN WORTH LITTLE MONEY. 2 DOLLAR IS LITTLE MONEY!


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All sales final.

.

Grand Lodge

1 person marked this as a favorite.
Pathfinder Adventure, Rulebook Subscriber; Pathfinder Battles Case Subscriber
GeraintElberion wrote:
I'll spot you $5 for TOZ.

Oh good, I'm not a two dollar whore!


TriOmegaZero wrote:
GeraintElberion wrote:
I'll spot you $5 for TOZ.
Oh good, I'm not a two dollar whore!

Hey, there's nothing wrong with 2-Buck Chuck.


2 people marked this as a favorite.
Ambrosia Slaad wrote:
So I should assume this means I'm either priceless or worthless... fantastic, you've just sparked all-out kumite between my irresistible egomaniacal and immovable self-doubting sides.

Update: Apparently, I was just sold at a different sekrit auction is all.

So cheer up! It is likely the the rest of you Island of Misfit Posters have been human(oid)-trafficked as well and just don't know it yet. I guess the real question is who will Liam Neeson show up to rescue?

Edit: Also, thank you Anonymous, wherever you are. :D

Shadow Lodge

TriOmegaZero wrote:
GeraintElberion wrote:
I'll spot you $5 for TOZ.
Oh good, I'm not a two dollar whore!

$6!

Sovereign Court

Dragonborn3 wrote:
TriOmegaZero wrote:
GeraintElberion wrote:
I'll spot you $5 for TOZ.
Oh good, I'm not a two dollar whore!
$6!

$9.99 plus s/h!


1 person marked this as a favorite.
zylphryx wrote:
Dragonborn3 wrote:
TriOmegaZero wrote:
GeraintElberion wrote:
I'll spot you $5 for TOZ.
Oh good, I'm not a two dollar whore!
$6!
$9.99 plus s/h!

Don't forget to punch air-holes in the box.


If you order through this special TV offer, they'll include a second TriOmegaZero absolutely free! But wait... call in right now and they're throw in a set of Ginsu katanas... ABSOLUTELY FREE!


1 person marked this as a favorite.

I wager 15 quatloos TOZ is untrainable.

Shadow Lodge

You owe me 15 quatioos.


Okay........heel then.

Silver Crusade

2 people marked this as a favorite.

I'll pay you 33 bucks to keep Anklebiter from doing it on the streets.

Keep America Clean


1 person marked this as a favorite.

[Lights match, burns down the mill]

Shadow Lodge

zylphryx wrote:
Dragonborn3 wrote:
TriOmegaZero wrote:
GeraintElberion wrote:
I'll spot you $5 for TOZ.
Oh good, I'm not a two dollar whore!
$6!
$9.99 plus s/h!

$9.99 PLUS a full tank of gas for whatever car/truck he's delivered in.


If you buy TOZ, do you get actual TOZ or TriOmegaZero?

I think that point should be clarified. Heisenbergian Users are always a tricky purchase.

I'll throw in $11.45 just in case, though.


Can I put any of these things in cages. I love cages.


You can put anything in a cage. There's a grumpy old dude in a magic hat and robe two blocks north in the alley behind the Starbucks. He sells invisible cages and boxes that not even a mime can escape from.

Sovereign Court

Ambrosia Slaad wrote:
You can put anything in a cage. There's a grumpy old dude in a magic hat and robe two blocks north in the alley behind the Starbucks. He sells invisible cages and boxes that not even a mime can escape from.

<runs off to the alley two blocks north behind Starbucks, buys cage and runs back>

Now where did Frank go?

Sovereign Court

A bidding war for TOZ?

I'm out, how much will you take for Sebastian?


No one bid on me? I applaud your good taste.

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