Phrases that are driving you bonkers


RPG Superstar™ General Discussion

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Liberty's Edge Dedicated Voter Season 6, Star Voter Season 7

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The "this item is favoured by" chestnut has been brought up many times, but I'm starting to wince and grit my teeth every time I see "this item appears to be".

Any other repetitious or meaningless phrases getting on your nerves?

RPG Superstar 2013 Top 4 , Marathon Voter Season 6, Star Voter Season 7

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"However, this item's true power is..."

Liberty's Edge Dedicated Voter Season 6, Star Voter Season 7

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"Upon closer inspection..."

Marathon Voter Season 6

"Makes it so that..."

Grand Lodge RPG Superstar 2012 Top 32 , Dedicated Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Dedicated Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9

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"Originally created by..."

Grand Lodge RPG Superstar 2012 Top 32 , Dedicated Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Dedicated Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9

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"Originally created by..."

I actually just had to choose between two items originally created by some really interesting fellows.


The [insert item name] is made of bloody [insert animal/humaniod] [insert body part] and causes the wearer to turn [insert sickly color]....

Liberty's Edge Star Voter Season 6

This [ubiquitious slot item] resembles a completely normal version of what would reasonably go in this slot. Then proceeding to describe the item without ever showing a difference between the normal and magical items that would go in that slot.

Example: "This spiked codpiece resembles an athletic cup made of steel with adamantine protrusions to ward off unwelcome advances to your most sensitive of areas."

RPG Superstar 2008 Top 16 , Marathon Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Marathon Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9 aka MythrilDragon

The true power of the item is revealed when...

&

This item has several powers/functions/abilities.

Designer, RPG Superstar Judge

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*claps in approval*

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"This item comes in pairs"

Grand Lodge RPG Superstar 2012 Top 32 , Dedicated Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Dedicated Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9

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In the hands of a *** this *** becomes a powerful tool.

Star Voter Season 6, Star Voter Season 7

Mikko Kallio wrote:
"Originally created by..."

This one has become a personal pet peeve, it shows me that the item has some weird backstory, and is an entirely superfluous waste of word count if in game I craft one myself.


"appears to be ordinary..." and variations on it. Wasn't the point of contest presenting wondrous items, not ordinary?

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"The" placed at the front of an item's name.

Liberty's Edge Marathon Voter Season 6

This ____ has the appearance of. Don't say it looks like x and then describe x. Just describe the item itself.

Grand Lodge RPG Superstar 2012 Top 32 , Dedicated Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Dedicated Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9

While not as bad as many other things mentioned here, I feel a bit sad each time an item's appearance is described as "nondescript". I want to see items that look interesting, have interesting names, and interesting functions.

Sczarni RPG Superstar Season 9 Top 16, RPG Superstar 2015 Top 32 , Star Voter Season 6, Star Voter Season 7, Star Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9 aka CalebTGordan

"This produces an affect of..."

"The effected target..."

"Once x happens, than Y happens..."

Dedicated Voter Season 6, Star Voter Season 7

"This item is prized by..." Or any variation thereof. And "But in the hands of [insert class] the item's true power is shown." The grammatical stuff and the passive writing isn't bothering me as much, unless it's way bad. But come on...

Did anybody even read Sean's Consolidated Advice Thread?

Scarab Sages

Aeris Fallstar wrote:
"This item is prized by..." Or any variation thereof. And "But in the hands of [insert class] the item's true power is shown." The grammatical stuff and the passive writing isn't bothering me as much, unless it's way bad. But come on...

That's not just bad grammar, but bad design.

Shouldn't the item function identically, for all users?

Sure, if it enhances abilities one person doesn't have (like a non-caster using a pearl of power), they'll get less (or no) benefit, but that doesn't alter the fact that the item behaves identically in each user's hands.

Aeris Fallstar wrote:
Did anybody even read Sean's Consolidated Advice Thread?

Well, lots of people haven't read it the first time he posted it, or the several years since, so why change now?

Silver Crusade RPG Superstar 2014 Top 16 , Dedicated Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Marathon Voter Season 8, Marathon Voter Season 9 aka Zahir ibn Mahmoud ibn Jothan

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While I use Sean's 27 rules as a guideline, I don't take them as gospel (no offense meant dude), as there are items in the CRB and other references which would violate some of his rules (usually the SIAC rule), but are still great items.

RPG Superstar 2008 Top 16 , Marathon Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Marathon Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9 aka MythrilDragon

There are a lot of great items in the mix, many would be good in a book of magic items or as part of a specific adventure that ignore the SKR advice. The items I want to see in the top 32 are the extreamly creative ones that fit the Fantasy Game setting and avoid the pitfalls of being just another cool magic item.

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Andrew Black wrote:
There are a lot of great items in the mix, many would be good in a book of magic items or as part of a specific adventure that ignore the SKR advice. The items I want to see in the top 32 are the extreamly creative ones that fit the Fantasy Game setting and avoid the pitfalls of being just another cool magic item.

I have not seen any items like that. Even my own which I designed as a kind of Volvo. Solid, nice, reliable magic item and neat to boot. There has not been any in my pairs I would call Mercedes.

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Coridan wrote:
Andrew Black wrote:
There are a lot of great items in the mix, many would be good in a book of magic items or as part of a specific adventure that ignore the SKR advice. The items I want to see in the top 32 are the extreamly creative ones that fit the Fantasy Game setting and avoid the pitfalls of being just another cool magic item.
I have not seen any items like that. Even my own which I designed as a kind of Volvo. Solid, nice, reliable magic item and neat to boot. There has not been any in my pairs I would call Mercedes.

They are rare but so far I have seen three of what you are calling "Mercedes" items.

This is in over a thousand items viewed so yeah they are rare.

I do have 44 items in my keep folder right now, however those three stand out head and shoulders above in my opinion.

RPG Superstar 2008 Top 16 , Marathon Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Marathon Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9 aka MythrilDragon

I have seen a few items that I would like to see in the top 32, creative items that have an inspirational spark and well executed. I have seen a bunch that I think are great solid items, but they lack creativity even if they are well executed. I have seen a ton of items that make me go "what where they thinking?". I have also seen a buch that I think are cool, but the three paragraphs of charter/setting flavor that have nothing to do with how the item functions make thinkthey need more practice.

Remember the top 32 end up being less than 5% of all the entries, the odds are we will see more I the lower then the higher.

Dedicated Voter Season 6, Star Voter Season 7

No offense taken, Zahir. But those guidelines are for Wondrous items and he has specifically said many items in the books don't fit them. That isn't the point.

They are trying to find the items that make people go "Wow!". Keeping those guidelines in mind seem like the best way to do that. Another Cloak of Resistance, dressed up in purple prose isn't really Wondrous. It's been done in before in the CRB. Without the purple prose.

Liberty's Edge Marathon Voter Season 6

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I think if I ever need a job in golarion I am going to be a filigree master. Every magic item (that doesnt look like an ordinary x) seems to be covered in filigree.

Dedicated Voter Season 6

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Covent wrote:
[...]I do have 44 items in my keep folder right now, however those three stand out head and shoulders above in my opinion.

I would like to see your list of Keep items. However, even as a PM, that may constitute breaking a rule. Maybe after the 22nd, you could post the list of your top picks?

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Inkwell wrote:
Covent wrote:
[...]I do have 44 items in my keep folder right now, however those three stand out head and shoulders above in my opinion.
I would like to see your list of Keep items. However, even as a PM, that may constitute breaking a rule. Maybe after the 22nd, you could post the list of your top picks?

When we are allowed to discuss items, I was planning on asking for permission to create just such a thread and if Paizo has no problem with it doing so.

I feel to create an accurate post I would have to list the items completely and in doing so I am listing a large amount of Paizo IP so I would like to get their permission first.

In short, yes that sounds great as long as Paizo has no problem with it.

Edit: fixed a typo

Marathon Voter Season 6

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Some of these are so nitpicky that I half expect someone to add "On a failed save" or "Requirements Craft Wondrous Item".

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Coridan wrote:
I think if I ever need a job in golarion I am going to be a filigree master. Every magic item (that doesnt look like an ordinary x) seems to be covered in filigree.

From the items I've seen, though, I'd say I'd want to be a gossamer merchant. Gossamer, gossamer, gossamer, every ten items or so has some kind of gossamer doohickey.

Liberty's Edge Dedicated Voter Season 6, Star Voter Season 7

To jump on the bandwagon here, I'm really not fond of items that are "... especially prized by..." or "... typically used by...".

If that's the case, why would anyone who's not one of the relevant groups bother to keep, buy, or build one of the items? You're essentially telling players who should own an item. That's limiting or dictating player choices and that's a Bad Thing.

Also, gross-out items; the ones made of severed heads still dripping blood and the internal organs of small animals; are really gauche and, quite frankly, disgusting. I don't mean either of those things in any way that even remotely approaches good.

Nick Logue and Boomer write well and often tend to use some pretty wild ideas and imagery. But it's not the gross-out factor or over-the-topness that made/make their stuff good. The stuff they write is actually good and doesn't totally depend on the abattoir gimmick to get by. It does't matter how you paint a house if the superstructure is rotted.

Ironically, these are all things that several judges have mentioned several times in the past.

I'd say that, after 5 years, people should "get it" by now. However, based on every year's entries, comments, and observations, that is not now and likely never will be the case.

However, at least these folks had the wherewithal to participate. That takes some guts (pun intended). Hopefully, they'll learn and it'll be an entirely new batch of contestants making the mistakes next year.


"Craft Wonderous Item"

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Nazard wrote:
Coridan wrote:
I think if I ever need a job in golarion I am going to be a filigree master. Every magic item (that doesnt look like an ordinary x) seems to be covered in filigree.
From the items I've seen, though, I'd say I'd want to be a gossamer merchant. Gossamer, gossamer, gossamer, every ten items or so has some kind of gossamer doohickey.

Professional voter prized by entrants using shadow filigree embossed dohickey's of the illustrious god of magic....

Silver Crusade RPG Superstar 2014 Top 16 , Dedicated Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Marathon Voter Season 8, Marathon Voter Season 9 aka Zahir ibn Mahmoud ibn Jothan

Yes, the word filigree has shown up several times, as have other random thesaurus type words. I don't mind it, but I certainly notice them.

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"...often..." is also starting to grate, as in, "These boots often have pictures of braying donkeys in gossamer filigree on the sides." (made-up example, of course).

If a wondrous item has a particular theme or decoration 80% of the time, the description should just say that the item has that decoration. It's like describing human beings to an alien as "creatures that are often less than seven feet tall".

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"_____ and, surprisingly, _____"

Liberty's Edge Marathon Voter Season 6

Covent, I am curious. Are the ones you liked showing up again and again or only ones you havent liked?

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Coridan wrote:
Covent, I am curious. Are the ones you liked showing up again and again or only ones you havent liked?

Honestly I see a much larger repeat rate on what I would consider substandard items. On the excellent items I have only seen them a few times each. In one case only twice.

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Then I am glad I have only seen my own once =) hopefully it is on your list cuz I forgot to keep a copy for myself lol.

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Coridan wrote:
Then I am glad I have only seen my own once =) hopefully it is on your list cuz I forgot to keep a copy for myself lol.

My best wishes! :-)


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Covent wrote:
Coridan wrote:
Covent, I am curious. Are the ones you liked showing up again and again or only ones you havent liked?
Honestly I see a much larger repeat rate on what I would consider substandard items. On the excellent items I have only seen them a few times each. In one case only twice.

I am off topic here, but is it good to have not seen my item after many many hours of voting? I keep seeing the same items again and again - it is great to actually see a new item once in a while.

Now back to topic, my newest dislike is the "to activate this item, open up your jugular vein and drain 8d6 points of blood, which the item consumes with relish...."

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"the item is dangerous to use because" random wonky cursed item problem added for imaginary "balance"

The Exchange RPG Superstar 2010 Top 16, Contributor

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The two biggies that have been driving me crazy are

* "affect versus effect" (which I know can be tricky since I blow it sometimes, but it's 300 words, c'mon, not that hard).
* Commas – For some reason people think commas are optional in prices and costs.

But my bigger pet-peeve is an item that is so confusing or has so much description I can't figure out what it's basic function is in the first paragraph and a half. If you can't get me some basic idea of what your golden gizmo does by the beginning of the second paragraph then I'm probably not going to wade through another 150+ words to figure it out.

Which brings up my final issue.... 290+ words. Few items really need that many words. If your item has that many, you probably should have done some more editing.

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Dennis Baker wrote:


Which brings up my final issue.... 290+ words. Few items really need that many words. If your item has that many, you probably should have done some more editing.

I've seen at least one item that would be over 300 words if it was formatted correctly. I've seen a couple in the high 290's that made me take a second look at the formatting just to see if this DQ'd the item as far as I'm concerned.

Liberty's Edge Marathon Voter Season 6

People should avoid random effects in their items. Items like grey bag of tricks are core, yes, only for their legacy.


Another prized by... but now useful to others too...

And despite use of that phrase it is moderately decent item. And certainly better than the spell-in-a-can I am comparing with now.

Star Voter Season 6

Lots of 'cavorting' creatures on items. And items that involve dancing. Hmmmm...


So this item looks completely normal to you...except for the totally weird stuff on it that you apparently didn't notice at first because it looked so normal.


Did we already complained about adding unnecessary sentences that state things that should not be stated?

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