False factoids


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IHIYC is voting for the democratic candidate so he/she can usher in the apocalypse.


Arrh!

Just like meself, Dr G House'll be supporting Ben Carson whatever happens. We doctors gotta stick together!


Dr. Pirate didn't spend those years at Pirate University (P.U.) to be called MISTER Pirate.


KahnyaGnorc likes cows puns just a LITTLE more than is healthy.


Ventnor speaks Afrikaans, Albanians, Arabic, Armenian, Basque, Belarusian, Bengali, Bosnian, French, Klingon, Shyriiwook, Ewokese, Latin, Leo, Spanish, and Welsh

Sovereign Court

This is because ULTRAGEEK needed a translator for successful diplomatic relations with the countries who speak those languages.


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Avatar of Zon-Kuthon studied Ewokese in college. Now he can't remember more than "yub-yub."


Ventnor studied the Ventnor-eese in college. Now he can only speak the languages of lowly mortals, and thus, his avatar image changed to a dragon, and he was forced to only exist on these messageboards! *rant* *rant*


The Rantings Of An Old Man can say 'Get off my gubdanged lawn!' 'That Ross Perot talks a lot of gubdanged sense' 'They ain't pants unless the waistband's somewhere 'round my gubdanged nipples' and 'Mabel, gubdanged well pass the Viagra' in all the known languages of the Multiverse.

Scarab Sages

Pulg is favored by the cardboard kami. They do their best to bring him good luck, shield him from harm, and obey his commands...within limits.


IHIYC is favored by the imaginary kami within Pulg's head. No real luck, shielding, or obeying results from this.

Scarab Sages

KahnyaGnorc's sweetheart sold his sword to get money to buy her a bejeweled mirror for her face - only to discover that in order to buy her sweetheart a magical scabbard for his sword, KahnyaGnorc had sold her face!


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I'm Hiding In Your Closet, after being crowned King, now refers to himself as We're Hiding In Your Closet.


Ventnor lends his flame breath and BBQ dry rub creation skills to charity events for homeless orcish orphans ::gets a little misty eyed:: And people say dragons only take.


GM_B eats monkeys feet first so they can realize what is happening and struggle as they go down.

Sovereign Court

GoatToucher doesn't EAT food, let's leave it at that.

Scarab Sages

GoatToucher once enjoyed a 3-way with Mr. and Mrs. Potato-Head.

Right before he sat back with a vodka-and-tonic as he watched Avatar of Zon-Kuthon peel them alive.


There is something inside of each of us. Something eternal. Something that reflects each of our unique inner beings, untroubled by the worries of the world. Something that lives on after we pass: a shining star of pure identity set in the firmament of eternity.

That is what I eat.

Turns out people don't need it to live, just to feel anything besides a dull existential ache. Thus: no crime that can be empirically defined has been committed.


What GT doesn't realise is that every time he does so, a fairy buys a trombone.


Pulg has put together an all fairy orchestra, with a particularly large trombone section, which performs "Sweet Cracked Nuts of GoattToucher" as their final selection, to a standing ovation.


GM_Beernorg secretly wishes he could be as awesome as me, John Kretzer.


TOTALLY John Kretzer died twenty years ago.


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PRRRAP PAPAPAPAHHH!!! PRAPPAPAPAPAPAPAPA!!! PRRRAP PRAPPP PAPAPAPAPA!!

That was my fairy trombone orchestra, backing up Ventnor as he performed the oration at TOTALLY John Kretzer's fake funeral, right before the 21 gun salute and fly-past by the Red Arrows.


Pulg is always up for a shot of tequila at the Biohazard Bar...


Shell Shocked XCOM Agent only signed up for the college money.

Scarab Sages

GM_Beernorg only signed up for the uniform - will somebody PLEASE get that man a shirt?!?!


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IHIYC is the present Secretary of the Chester Schuster Leicester and Manchester Jester's League for Shikse Justice.


Pulg tried to say that five times fast and his lips exploded.


GoatToucher once kissed a real live human woman, her lips also exploded, along with her head.

Silver Crusade

GM_Beernorg loves to play Frank Sinatra while driving monster trucks.


Caesar is on my pit crew when I drive "Tuskerdoo II", alas, we are working on him not chasing the giant tires of our rivals, it is not only dangerous, but embarrassing for the team. ::turns up the Frank to max volume::


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GM_Beernorg and Frank are both hard at work trying to cross a Dachshund with a shire horse in order to create a beast that can cope with chasing the tyres of monster trucks. Valuable assistance has been provided by GoatToucher, although perhaps neither 'valuable' nor 'assistance' are quite the words we're looking for here.


Pulg's actual name is Glupgronreeb_MGgods'7ykcul ,raseacrehcouttaoG

Scarab Sages

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The Paladin who Fell gets knocked down, but he gets up again! You're never gonna keep him down!


IHIYC once fell because he slipped on a discarded bannana peel, discarded by GT mind you. Don't ask why the peel isn't yellow anymore...

Scarab Sages

The peel is no longer yellow because it is now coated with a strange and brilliant mixture of liquid gold and copper. This is because Molten Dragon blew his nose with it.

Shame on you for trying to blame it on (Scape?)GoatToucher!

Sovereign Court

I have to agree with IHIYC, he knows when GoatToucher has something.


GoatToucher is the centerpiece of Avatar of Zon-Kuthon's plot to end existence.


Ventnor is the mantlepiece in AoZK's open-plan breakfast room and taxidermy studio

Scarab Sages

...and Pulg is the decorative wastebin.


IHIYC provides IT support for the breakfast room/taxidermy studio, from the server closet, amazing how hot it gets in that little room full of blade servers.


GM_B's feud with the local tavern keeper prompted him to hire a vicious team of Blade Servers to take him out.


GT's feud with Fallen Paladin's caused him to stop touching goats and start touching cows. No one knows why he started doing that


The Paladin who Fell just ruined cheese for me, forever. How does that old saying go "just because you can, doesn't mean you should" touch cows.

Sovereign Court

GM_Beernorg managed to regain his love of cheese by becoming a super cool guidance counselor for celebrities and deities. Although, I find it strange that he won't enter my Safari Room/Private Museum. It's decorated just like his man cave after all, skinned pelt rugs, heads mounted on the walls and animal skeletons a plenty.


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Long ago, Dou-Bral asked me to "Investigate (his) man cave." I did so at length, and with great creativity and enthusiasm (if I do say so myself).

I wonder whatever happened to that bright-eyed young fellow...


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When it was GoatToucher's turn to play The Jet-Propelled Gynecologist, his catch-phrase at the end of each episode was 'I gots the smarts on lady-parts!', delivered with a cheeky wink and an uplifted right thumb.


Pulg taught Thomas the Train to be cheeky.


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MD is a Really Useful Engine.

Scarab Sages

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GoatToucher knows over 320 ways to make coal an even dirtier fuel.

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