False factoids


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Not many people are aware of this but as a child Molten Dragon had an imaginary friend named Jeffery. Nobody believed Jeffery existed until one day Jeffery set Molten Dragon on fire, who back then was simply known as Dragon.


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JTDV is, in fact, four puppies operating a mechanical ankheg suit.


GoatToucher is from a race of tiny perverts who love to get into all sorts of erotic places like CENSORED and CENSORED. However, due to a lab accident, GoatToucher grew to such immense proportions for his race, people mistook him for a hooman.


KahnyaGnorc drives the getaway car!

Sovereign Court

And JTD is constantly run over by the getaway car.

Scarab Sages

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The Big Bad Wolf of Karazhan loves chasing the getaway car - and running JTD over again in the process. You can set your clock by that one.


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IHIYC has a getaway chariot, pulled by animated balloon animals.


Pulg rides shotgun but it's pointing at his own face.


JDTV has a shotgun for a face.


Pulg wrote a book once. Observe:

Available in stores now! The epic story of Sam's continuing journey.

Samwise the Brave!

We want to hear more about Sam!" - The NY Thymes

Follow along as Sam raises children, tills the garden, and smokes the pipe!

Brought to you by PulgCorp®


That was the Estate of JDTV Trollkein.

The Estate in question being a miserable collection of enslaved mongrelmen and trogdolytes, trapped in JDTV's Stygian Realm of Nightmares, deep in the Underdark.

Sovereign Court

Of which, Pulg is the sole inheritor. Until that is, when Pulg's own son (?) Pulg Jr kills him to claim the inheritance.


The Big Bad Wolf of Karazhan also has a son.

Known as the The Little Bad Wolf of Karazhan.


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JTDV wrote:


Samwise the Brave!

...and smokes the pipe!

I think I read a fanfic once called "Sam Smokes the Pipe"

The wizard "arrived" exactly when he meant to.


GoatToucher was thrown out of the Naughty Vets' Club for singing "AH C'N HEAR IT COMIN' IN YUH HAIR TONIGHT, OH LAWD', and matching actions to words.

Even the Naughty Vets have to draw the line somewhere.


Pulg, and his reflection Glup, have many a wacky adventure.


KahnyaGnorc and her reflection however always end up in a bitter argument about which direction to go.


In The Game Hamster's reflection, you can't see the books. That's because they're vampiric!


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Guess what? JDTV's super new film, 'Robin Hood: Prince of Frotteurs' has just received the 'Prix D'Or' at Cnanse! Oddly, though, I've never seen 'Prix' spelled with a 'ck' at the end before. Maybe it's a local dialect variant or something.


Pulg is furthering his policy of honesty in business practices by advertising himself as a "Frottage Therapist".


Pulg has built a summer home on a space station orbiting Venus from the receipts from GoatToucher's visits to the aforementioned Frottage Therapist.


KG is Pulg's receptionist. They hear things. Sounds that come from the therapy room.

Sounds that don't seem quite... human.


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Like PROOPY PROO PROO! PROPROPROO! PROPOPOPOP POPROO!?

GoatToucher will never accept that trombones are people, just like you and me. Well, just like me, anyway.


This alias' name is a typo: Limey wanted to name it "Pulg's Hairy Trombone Orchestra".


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A hairy trombone would sound dreadful, Kileanna.

And is also probably a euphemism for something utterly, utterly unspeakable.


Pulg knows it is said euphemism, it is a side effect of seeing GoatToucher so much in therapy sessions.


KG is close friends with Harry Trombone and his brother Rusty.


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GoatToucher can levitate when he spins in circles really fast.


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JTD is holding his hands up in the avatar that way because he is about to go into surgery to save the life of Marx . . . Groucho, not Karl.


KahnyaGnorc also went through JTD's surgical methods once. She's never been the same since.
You wouldn't either if you had a bronze foot that was replaced with actual flesh.


TGH makes $$$ in his spare times by operating a freelance cheese-bronzing service. You can too!


Pulg made a fortune bronzing bronze.

Dark Archive

KahnyaGnorc performed the ingenious metallurgical-surgical process that made Doc Savage into "The Man of Bronze!"


Dr. Zephyrus Vitruvian has had a surgical operation named after him and his specialty. Unfortunately, nobody asks for "The Squat" even if they are near death.


JTDV owns JDTV, a television channel that consists solely of the ankheg himself squirting whisky up his nose with a bicycle pump, all day long.

Sovereign Court

Pulg is the channel's number one (and thank goodness, only) watcher.


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TBBWoK tuned in ONCE. He went insane for about two weeks.


TGH spent the summer of '98 in a whirlwind romance with acclaimed actor Richard Gere.

Things ended... poorly.


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GoatToucher likes to attend Irish Naturist conventions in a severely abbreviated Leprechaun costume while singing:

"O dangly boy.
Your pipe, your pipe's appalling"

Also known as the London Derriere.

Rumour has it that he has been punched in the schnozz only once as a result.


Pulg once tried to divorce one of his brick-wives but since it refused to sign any of the documents, he dropped it, but they have remained estranged for years now.


The Game Hamster drives a Monster Truck as his vehicle of choice.


JTDV is a Monster Truck on his free time.

Scarab Sages

Kileanna thinks "monster trucks" are some variety of kinky Internet art genre.


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IHIYC has an aberration truck.


Pulg wears Monster Trunks (aka shorts).


"Monster Trunks" is the primary antagonist in JTD's Dragonball Z fanfiction. He has written 27 chapters so far.

There is a tasteful level of eroticism.


Once upon a time, GoatToucher was an inoffensive Gaucho Otter, until he touched the Anagrammatom, who gave his current powers, unleashing GoatToucher to the world.


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SO! It's all the anagrammaton's fault??
I knew there was something shifty about that thing...

A saliva Colonizer used to be a planetary colonizer, but was hit by a shrink ray, which shrunk her down so small that individual saliva molecules looked like planets to her. The rest, as they say, is history.


TGH intends to make his fortune by wrapping bassoons in pastry, deep-frying them and selling them as extra crunchy sausage rolls.


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Pulg intends to make his fortune by selling wild corndogs.

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