False factoids

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I'm Hiding In Your Closet was the inspiration for the Bangles' Manic Monday.

JDTV claims to be on the brink of persuading Tom Hanks to take part in a shot by shot remake of Mazes and Monsters

Pulg is actually made up of thin slices of seaweed, rather than hair.

TGH tried to use Pulg's seaweed as an alternate sustainable material for his books, but the results weren't good.

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Kileanna's fiery gaze is actually just a pair of brain-gnomes inside her skull shining torches out through her eye-sockets.

Scarab Sages

Pulg's eyes have a VCR-level rewind feature.

I'm Hiding In Your Closet actually prefers to hide you your sock drawer.

JTDV always wears mitmatched socks, and it's not easy mismatching all socks with so many feet! Only he knows why an Ankheg would wear socks.

Many people know that Kileanna used to be a "Legs" model for various companies and catalogs. She'd model pants, dresses, stockings, and swimsuits. What they never knew was that while her legs (from hip to ankle) are four feet long, her total length (from head to toe) is only five foot six inches.

JTDV skips leg day! JTDV skips leg day!

|| <- His legs.

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JTD skips mandible day!

(^) <- his mandibles

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GoatToucher skips body day!

O <- His head and entire body

Sissyl does NOT skip "Make every part of your body spiky" day.

KahnyaGnorc does however. (skip "Make every part of your body spiky day" I mean. Seriously though, with out a physical form, it is difficult to participate in such exercises)

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The books TGH has been lugging around since forever are, interestingly enough, a copy of Putzwaltz' Love lives of the Platypi and Smith-Smythe-Smith von Oettingen Oettingen's 500 recipes for dodo. Both are near legendary in their rarity, and often rumoured about in book collector circles.

Sissyl doesn't read books, but she is the original, uncredited, managing editor of the Necronomicon.

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JDTV has been banned from Sweden for trying to mate with Sissyl's hat, more than once.

Pulg is a wookie with male pattern baldness

Joshua9093's knowledge of Wookiee physiology is without peer.

Why he regularly coughs up fist-sized hairballs is anybody's guess.

Dark Archive

While his knowledge of goat ecology is respected in many academic and agricultural circles, rumors persist that GoatToucher - an advocate of goat supremacy - has been seen associating with pro-sheep and cow groups that haunt the rising political farming scene.

TheChelaxian was originally the Chillaxian, but Asmodeus started sponsoring his vacation trips, so . . .

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KahnyaGnorc once told a lie that Pinocchio believed. When Pinocchio repeated the story to someone else, his head exploded and KahnyaGnorc was there to laugh at him.

The Pinoccio explosion mentioned above resulted in a four inch splinter becoming lodged in JTD's spine, depriving him of his abilities to walk and to control his bowel movements.

GoatToucher only pronounces 57% of his c's, and only 12.345% of his f's, but pronounces a full 147% of his g's and 500000% of his [REDACTED]

The correct pronunciation of KahnyaGnorc's name is impossible for everyone except GoatToucher.

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Rashly5 refuses to eat butter unless it first defeats him in mortal combat.

As a skilled herbalist, Pulg welcomes all challengers to Mortar and Pestle combat.

As a skilled Herbalist, KG ministers to the physical care and... appetites... of several dozen men named Herbert. They pay upwards of seven dollars for a weekly half-hour session.

GoatToucher once changed his name to Herbert just to experience KahnyaGnorc's ministrations.

Rashly's previous name was Herbert too... but he legally changed it to avoid being mistaken for another of the previously mentioned Herberts.

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Kileanna Types everything she means to exactly the way she wants every time and NEVER goes back to corrects things.

Man, that's the biggest lie I've ever heard about myself!!!

Vid always speaks the truth. Always.

Kileanna thinks that a Herbert is a pervert with a herb fetish.

Pulg would have some sage advice for those kinds of Herberts, but he has no thyme to dispense it.

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In the beginning of time, KahnyaGnorc was not one, but TWO separate entities.

Kahnya was a daffodil lover, and an all around fuzzy ball of goodness. Gnorc loved to strangle puppies before eating his hearty breakfast of Myconid People with dressing sauce.

One day they met in a cosmic battle for the fate in the Universe, but instead of one defeating the other, they merged in an untidy union.

Since then, KahnyaGnorc has been mostly occupied with knitting mittens for kittens, but under the surface, the Evil that was Gnorc is still there, occasionnaly bubbling on the surface from the depths of the Interweb fora to mentally scar RPG enthusiasts.

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In the beginning of time Quiche Lisp had a long mane, but he felt pity of Vid and Pulg who were bald and cold, and shaved his head to lend them some hair. His sacrifice won't be forgotten.

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Kileanna commemorates Quiche Lisp's selfless & noble act by setting fire to her ears every 27th of May.

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Emulating Lady Godiva, Pulg once rode a Segway through an English town naked.

JTDV once protested the Whizzo Chocolate Company over their their chocolate ankheg spleen flavor . . .

Kahnyagnorc spelled backwards is Taco cat.

Vidmaster discovered dyslexia sometime around 3500 B.C - much at the same time that writing was invented.

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Columbus discovered Quiche Lisp in 1491, but chose not to make the fact public.

Pulg was once offered the position of god of all dustbunnies. He declined, seeing more profit in becoming the god of yarn, especially yarn tangles. That position was removed with the decreasing importance of yarn, leaving Pulg a mortal.

Sissyl is actually not aware that she is wearing a headdress, and would be alarmed to find out the truth, especially via a post like this one.

GoatToucher has different names in different countries. In Hungry he is recognized as KecskeTouch. In Portugal he is CabraToque. And in the Ukraine he is called KозячеCенсорний. But most disturbingly, he is known as MammalToucher in that completely separate country simply known as Louisiana.

JTD does not believe New York actually exists.

Once a year (nearabout the summer solstice), KahnyaGnorc experiences two days of intense abdominal pain, culminating in them spitting out a five pound pineapple.

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JTD forgot to mention that in Mexico GoatToucher is known as El TocaCabra. It still sounds less perverted than Chupacabra (goatsucker)...

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In all countries south of the Equator, Kileanna is known as Bonnie Tyler, while the reverse is true in the north, thanks to a Papal Bull that was issued in the year 1617.

Pulg is actually in the Total Eclipse of the Heart video. They couldn't make his eyes bright enough so they had to cut his part out.

Pulgs hair was the inspiration for Bonnie Tyler's hair in the video, though.

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