LeAnn Rimes' teeth fall out out mid-concert during performance in Washington
"Dental bridge" fell out! Yeah, right. More like part of the mask hiding her inhuman feature broke off. I've known for awhile she was sent to earth to entrance us with her eerie vocal powers.
Massive bee swarm sends three people to hospital in critical condition, 24 injured
Bee Control Ray? Or has the insect world finally started on its campaign to end mankind?
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Or dogs. Or dogs with bees in their mouths so when they bark they shoot bees at you.
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If you have interstellar travel, you can probably dodge an Earthling jet.
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If you have interstellar travel, you can probably dodge an Earthling jet.
I dunno. I've been in many an Earthling jet and yet can't dodge a common housefly when it decides to headbutt me...
...or dog-shot bees for that matter.
Mysterious Ring camera footage sparks alien speculation
What do the Ring Camera manufacturers know? And when did they know it?
Hmmm...Could be an attempted experiment to bestow super-powers on unsuspecting Americans.
BMW recalls nearly 200K vehicles due to fire risk, says owners should park outside
"Engine starter relay corrosion" risking fire? Yeah, right. Probably a rogue AI.
*squints suspiciously* Hey, why is Conspiracy Buff so buff? Some people are saying -- smart people, the best people -- are saying CB is on the swol payroll of Charles Atlas, the Hostess fruit pies consortium, and Sea Monkey Maritime Exports, Ltd. Perhaps its time to officially investigate them? I know I certainly will give them a closer look when my genuine made-in-America x-ray specs arrive in the mail from Johnson Smith Co!
Amazon delivery drones crash into crane, prompting NTSB, FAA investigation
What does that crane operator know? Is that why they AIs were trying to silence him?
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*squints suspiciously* Hey, why is Conspiracy Buff so buff? Some people are saying -- smart people, the best people -- are saying CB is on the swol payroll of Charles Atlas, the Hostess fruit pies consortium, and Sea Monkey Maritime Exports, Ltd. Perhaps its time to officially investigate them? I know I certainly will give them a closer look when my genuine made-in-America x-ray specs arrive in the mail from Johnson Smith Co!
That's exactly the kind of attack I would expect from one of THEM!! I must be getting to close to the truth!!!
What does that crane operator know?
No one:
My brain just now: "What if cranes, herons, and storks were just fancy mechs piloted by miniature ferrets?"
No one:
My brain: "Teeny sweary ferrets. Hopped up on sugar and caffeine."
No one:
My brain: "It'd be like a mashup of MechWarrior and Redwall."
The CIA killed off all the birds long ago. The current bird-like objects are spy drones. The internet says so. You can also buy merch.
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Yeah, but that could just be what the birds WANT us to think. They are masters of misinformation.
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The CIA killed off all the birds long ago. The current bird-like objects are spy drones. The internet says so. You can also buy merch.
The bird-objects are drones ... but not under humanity's control. They are the advance scouts for the return of the dinosaur races, who evacuated offplanet to wait out that whole asteroid mess.
Yabba dabba doooom!
Yabba dabba doooom!
You can't fool me with that code!! You're one of....THEM....aren't you?!?
Conspiracy Buff, or conspiracy in the buff?
Conspiracy Buff, or conspiracy in the buff?
Buff Conspiracy Buff buffed in the buff in Buffalo.
{} Buffalo Ruffalos Buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo
Egyptian officials scramble to recover ancient painting stolen from 'cursed' tomb amid recent thefts
Thieves steal ‘priceless’ jewelry from the Louvre in 7-minute raid
Coincidence? Or are more sinister forces at work?!?
Wild Wolf Caught On Video Possibly Using Human Tools For First Time Ever
All the better to serve their inhuman, other-dimensional masters.
Man caught on camera approaching, spraying unknown substance toward Yellowstone wolves
My guess would be it was a solution to introduce nanites into the wolf population. This way they can control them at some future point.
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Man caught on camera approaching, spraying unknown substance toward Yellowstone wolves
My guess would be it was a solution to introduce nanites into the wolf population. This way they can control them at some future point.
Ah HA!, nano-crabs controlled by the Cancer Consortium! Revenge is nigh for previously feasting on their agents:
Wild Wolf Caught On Video Possibly Using Human Tools For First Time Ever
All the better to serve their inhuman, other-dimensional masters.
Soon they will have an squadron of canine AT-ATs to ride into battle!
What about crayfish?
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What about crayfish?
They all made the mistake of trying to invade via Louisiana, and ended up getting boiled.
They were delicious.
What about crayfish?They all made the mistake of trying to invade via Louisiana, and ended up getting boiled.
They were delicious.
So, they infiltrate you from the inside out? And Louisiana has already fallen?
So, they infiltrate you from the inside out? And Louisiana has already fallen?What about crayfish?They all made the mistake of trying to invade via Louisiana, and ended up getting boiled.
They were delicious.
Oh, no. Louisiana fell long before then. For other reasons. They're just really good at cooking most things. That's why they have the best cuisine in all the US (and probably top 5 in the world).
Well, that and the aliens taught them some neat tricks.
Well, that and the aliens taught them some neat tricks.
Wait, wait, wait- so it was a cookbook after all?! Oh, no. The conspiracy even got to Rod Serling!
New Zealand reporter struck by bird during outdoor segment
Hmmmmm...What did this report know that made them attempt to take her out like this?
Interstellar comet keeps its distance as it makes its closest approach to Earth
Just close enough to spy on us.
Monkeys are on the loose in St. Louis and AI is complicating efforts to capture them
Hmmm...What could the AIs be up to now? Maybe just testing us? Or testing the efficacy of monkey's as potential shock troops in their war against humanity?
Shhhh...