Life Lessons I Wish My Parents Had Taught Me...


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You walk in there like you own the f&#*ing place and say "FIX. ME. SAMMICH."


84) Don't be fat.

Shadow Lodge

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85) Stay out of debt and your life is a lot easier.

86) It's better to have an old car you own than a new car with payments.

87) Happiness is realizing there are no bills and you just got paid.

Spoiler:
Yeah... these are all the same point essentially. And actually my dad DID teach me all these things. But sometimes wishes come true.


88) Never buy insurance.
89) Experiment with crime.
90) Remember to begin having children when in your teens.
91) Do run up huge credit card debt early in life.
92) So you don't tire yourself out, be a bad employee.


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93) For god's sake, when a woman says everything is 'fine' dont just accept her word for it!. 'Fine' is female for "There is something wrong, but i'm not going to tell you straight. If you love me you'll figure it out and fix it".


94) Rental cars are for doing everything you see in a movie.
95) Be sure there is some kind of insurance on the rental car.
96) DO NOT LET FRIENDS DRIVE THE RENTAL CAR! (Unless they are on the paperwork.)

Sovereign Court Contributor

97) Always carry a change of clothes, or have one in the car.

Silver Crusade

Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber

98) Be fat if you want, just don't be sedentary.

Scarab Sages

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99) The fingernails on a baby can cut through anything.


100) The secret to long term happiness with a woman is that she always respect and admire you. The only way to achieve this is to be a person worthy of respect and admiration.

Liberty's Edge

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101) Rotate the canned goods and ammo before they expire! The Zombipocalypse will always happen the day after the Beefaroni has bit the dust! Look out!! Undead Beefaroni!!!

Shadow Lodge

102) If you ever apply to graduate school, apply to work in a research area that has lots of funding to take on new students, then once you get accepted and start the semester, switch to something you like. If you do this you will get into a better school.

102) Remember this and it won't be a shock: Marriage is doing crap that you don't want to do for the rest of your life and then you die.


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103) Finding the right spouse won't fix all of your problems. Be responsible for your own personal development. Fix yourself and enjoy life. The right partner will find you soon enough.

Sovereign Court Contributor

104) You may stop growing, but your body hair won't. Don't be surprised. Or worried.


Aberzombie wrote:
99) The fingernails on a baby can cut through anything.

Wasn't that the lesson *you* taught your parents?

Scarab Sages

105) Marraige is an institution, and you'll be amazed at how many people want to spend the rest of their lives in one.

Dark Archive

Pathfinder Adventure, Adventure Path Subscriber

Walk gently but carry a big stick ... or a shotgun with a large ammmo capacity.

Grand Lodge

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Pathfinder Adventure, Rulebook Subscriber; Pathfinder Battles Case Subscriber

A boomstick is still a stick.


106) If you have a million dollars you are a millionaire, but if you spend just $1 you are no longer a millionaire.

Grand Lodge

107) Shave before you shower, not afterwards.
108) Confidence, manners and a bit of preparation gets you everything.
109) The Golden Rule
110) Humans love to be recognized and they love to be complimented. If you can manage this sincerely, you'll go far.
111) Humans are not interested in you. They are interested in themselves, and how you add to that.
112) Learn every day. Don't stop.
113) School will teach you how to fit into the system, not how to succeed in it. Not everyone is allowed to succeed. It's up to you to research this yourself.


107 is a big one for me. I wonder if this true for other black men or if it's just a me sorta thing.


114) Socialism is the only way to go for a country to get a good and steady economy in the long run.


Ekkonor1 wrote:
114) Socialism is the only way to go for a country to get a good and steady economy in the long run.

In which country? Because here it only led to big international debts, corruption and inefficiency everywhere not to mention skewed social expectations, and it took only forty years to fall apart. More or less the same for neighbors.


115) DO NOT KANCHO YOUR WIFE!
116) Eventually you need to sleep and you are defenseless.


117) How to manage my money better
118) That I should've gone into computer programming instead of broadcasting
119) Having a basic grasp of auto mechanics is necessary

There are many more, but I'm too tired to think of them. As for the ones I've listed, they tried to teach me those things. I didn't listen, and I regret it now.

Grand Lodge

Pathfinder Adventure, Rulebook Subscriber; Pathfinder Battles Case Subscriber
Drejk wrote:
Ekkonor1 wrote:
114) Socialism is the only way to go for a country to get a good and steady economy in the long run.
In which country? Because here it only led to big international debts, corruption and inefficiency everywhere not to mention skewed social expectations, and it took only forty years to fall apart. More or less the same for neighbors.

Hey, nothing in this thread said the lessons have to be correct. :P

Liberty's Edge

120) Take 20 minutes every morning to learn something* everyone actually cares about.

*Tachyon Condensation is a very poor conversation starter in 9 out of 10 situations. Pointing out that Tachyon Condensation is a poor conversation starter in 9 out of 10 situations is equally bad.


Kirth Gersen wrote:
...in the workplace, competence and skill count for nothing. Popularity is the thing that gets you ahead. Odds are, your management consists of a bunch of former D students, with IQs under 100...

Bingo.

Liberty's Edge

Kirth Gersen wrote:
Capitalizing on what Reckless said, my parents gave me the WORST possible advice when I was in school. They told me "Student council is just a stupid popularity contest. Popularity doesn't count for anything. Focus on schoolwork." They were dead wrong in that; in the workplace, competence and skill count for nothing. Popularity is the thing that gets you ahead. Odds are, your management consists of a bunch of former D students, with IQs under 100 and mail-order [degrees] but who are gifted at schmoozing...

...and whose actual accomplishments are got from the tireless efforts and dedication of those subordinate to them...


Ekkonor1 wrote:
114) Socialism is the only way to go for a country to get a good and steady economy in the long run.

121) Posters who troll for socialism within their first fifteen posts are...destined to be my friend!

Liberty's Edge

122) It may be that you shouldn't trust us. Don't let us define your place or sanctuary.


123) The likelihood that some 'fact' is wrong increases with the number of people who believe its true.

124) Life isn't fair, NO ITS REALLY NOT

Liberty's Edge

125) Life in and of itself isn't fair or just: good and bad things happen to everyone without regard to any superstition of just-desserts; your best bet is to constantly redefine your understanding of the nature of 'good' relative to your present circumstances, and never, never, never quit.

Liberty's Edge

Pathfinder Companion Subscriber; Pathfinder Roleplaying Game Superscriber

126) Sniff the (egg/potato/tuna/seafood) salad before trying it.

127) Don't eat yellow snow.

128) You're face may not stick that way, but the internet will keep the facebook photos of your face being that way.


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Darkwing Duck wrote:
The likelihood that some 'fact' is wrong increases with the number of people who believe its true.

So God most likely does not exist?

Or could it be that the likelihood and prevailance of belief are independent of one another?


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129. Most people rely overly much on tradition and precedence for guidance, even when it flies in the face of common sense and reason. As a result, whatever progress we make as a town, a nation, or an entire race is slowed to an infuriating crawl by the staggering weight of the average person's Wisdom score.

130. The average person's Wisdom is about 6. AKA "Common sense isn't common."

131. Most people believe that they're good and altruistic and talk as if life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness are precious. But if others having those things will raise taxes or inconvenience them in the slightest, a disappointing number of people will forget those professed ideals in a heartbeat.

132. Talking as if people with money and/or power don't need oversight in business and politics, as if a growing government isn't the natural result of time and technology, as if 'socialism' was a four-letter word that we're not already part of, and as if the nation was better in "the good ol' days" are great ways to get elected. (See #129.)

Freehold DM wrote:
107 is a big one for me. I wonder if this true for other black men or if it's just a me sorta thing.

Okay now I'm curious what the problem is with shaving after you shower, other than having to wipe off the condensation on the mirror.

Drejk wrote:
Ekkonor1 wrote:
114) Socialism is the only way to go for a country to get a good and steady economy in the long run.
In which country? Because here it only led to big international debts, corruption and inefficiency everywhere not to mention skewed social expectations, and it took only forty years to fall apart. More or less the same for neighbors.

I'm curious where 'here' is for you?


Kirth Gersen wrote:
Darkwing Duck wrote:
The likelihood that some 'fact' is wrong increases with the number of people who believe its true.

So God most likely does not exist?

Or could it be that the likelihood and prevailance of belief are independent of one another?

Depends on what is meant by 'God'. The meaning of that word has been in constant flux across time and space.


133. When someone says "everybody does x", when 'x' is some negative quality, that someone is almost invariably not including themselves, but probably should.

Lantern Lodge RPG Superstar 2015 Top 16

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134: It's ok to be a plumber, an electrician, or welder. Trade skills are becoming more valuable and cheaper to attain than many college degrees.

Liberty's Edge

Pathfinder Companion Subscriber; Pathfinder Roleplaying Game Superscriber

135) If you're going to pick you nose and your ass, remember, nose first.


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"As a general rule...people ask for advice only in order not to follow it; or if they do follow it, in order to have someone to blame for giving it.”

- Alexander Dumas

I keep this quote dear to me these days.


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137.) Questioning authority is a virtue.

Sovereign Court Contributor

138) People will often accuse you of doing or being the very thing they, themselves, are guilty of doing or being.

139) The more irrational and unexpected the personal attacks of others, the more likely they are projecting their own failings onto you, mistaking you for their parent, or otherwise unjustly taking out on you things they either lack the courage or insight to say to the persons actually deserving of their ire, tears, or wounded demands.


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140) No good deed will go unpunished.


Some of you seem to expect your parents to teach you all about the birds and bees. That's why they invented the internet and the printing press.


Louis Agresta wrote:
138) People will often accuse you of doing or being the very thing they, themselves, are guilty of doing or being.

138 Addendum) The Psychological word for this is reaction formation.


Spanky the Leprechaun wrote:
140) No good deed will go unpunished.

on a related note.

141) If you join the military never volunteer for anything.

Grand Lodge

Pathfinder Adventure, Rulebook Subscriber; Pathfinder Battles Case Subscriber

142. Conversely, volunteer for EVERYTHING. You'll get some good experiences with the bad.


TriOmegaZero wrote:
142. Conversely, volunteer for EVERYTHING. You'll get some good experiences with the bad.

Just wondering, Have you ever been in the military?

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