Evolution Petrie Dish


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To prevent contamination elsewhere...


Too late. And I'm counting down until we've heard all of these:

  • "If evolution is correct, then why are there still monkeys?"
  • "I don't believe that a 747 can be assembled out of random parts by a tornado!"
  • "Scientists think they know everything but it's obvious that people who don't know anything about science are far better suited to answer science questions because if you actually study a topic and work at it as a profession you're just putting on airs."
  • "Scientists are against God because they're scared of Him because they're immoral people, like Nazis."


  • Kirth Gersen wrote:

    Too late. And I'm counting down until we've heard all of these:

  • "If evolution is correct, then why are there still monkeys?"
  • "I don't believe that a 747 can be assembled out of random parts by a tornado!"
  • "Scientists think they know everything but it's obvious that people who don't know anything about science are far better suited to answer science questions because if you actually study a topic and work at it as a profession you're just putting on airs."
  • "Scientists are against God because they're scared of Him because they're immoral people, like Nazis."
  • SO many ideas for games!

    Immortal science-nazi's using weather manipulation to make airoplanes!

    Liberty's Edge

    1 person marked this as a favorite.
    Pathfinder Adventure, Adventure Path, Companion, Lost Omens, Pathfinder Accessories, Rulebook Subscriber
    Kirth Gersen wrote:

    Too late. And I'm counting down until we've heard all of these:

  • "If evolution is correct, then why are there still monkeys?"
  • "I don't believe that a 747 can be assembled out of random parts by a tornado!"
  • "Scientists think they know everything but it's obvious that people who don't know anything about science are far better suited to answer science questions because if you actually study a topic and work at it as a profession you're just putting on airs."
  • "Scientists are against God because they're scared of Him because they're immoral people, like Nazis."
  • Evolution on the Internet: The Drinking Game?


    I'll play! :)

    Kirth Gersen wrote:


  • "If evolution is correct, then why are there still monkeys?"
  • If their DNA line is successful given their niche, why wouldn't there still be monkeys? Monkeys are nice, leave them alone.

    Kirth Gersen wrote:


  • "I don't believe that a 747 can be assembled out of random parts by a tornado!"
  • First, jets are not sexy, so they do not have intrinsic motivation to assemble.

    Second, entropy trumps all. Meaning at some point there will not
    be anything... except the cold.

    Kirth Gersen wrote:


  • "Scientists think they know everything but it's obvious that people who don't know anything about science are far better suited to answer science questions because if you actually study a topic and work at it as a profession you're just putting on airs."
  • By definition a scientist can not think she knows everything, or

    she would not be doing science.
    But, your point about human arrogance is well taken.

    Kirth Gersen wrote:


  • "Scientists are against God because they're scared of Him because they're immoral people, like Nazis."
  • God doesn't make mistakes.

    .


    Grand Magus wrote:

    God doesn't make mistakes.

    Because, Baby, I was born this way

    Dark Archive

    Just responding to Evolution thoughts in the correct thread...

    GregH wrote:

    Absolutely. I was brought up strict Catholic (don't ask how that turned out...) and went to Catholic grade and high school. Never heard a word about creationism at all, only evolution in my biology classes and even the nuns taught us that Genesis was an allegory, not verbatim true.

    So, no you don't need to be an atheist to accept evolution.

    Serious question though, isn't this the thinking of the vast majority of Christians?

    Again, I only have personal anecdote here, but every Christian I know (and have brought the issue up with) accepts that Genesis wasn't verbatim true. OR accept that in ye ole writing a "day" could have meant an "age" or "unknown period of time."

    Now granted, I'm sure SOME Christians think the Bible is verbatim true, but aren't they in the minority?

    Just wondering. :)


    The relationship people have to the bible is an interesting one. When you relate to a text, you need to understand how your own thinking changes the text - thereis no objective reading. Some religions feel that the solution to this is to make their book objectively true. Sad part is, the bible is massive, and rife with contradictions. Most of the people who think the bible is objectively true solve this by focusing only on the things they like and do not care that by doing so, they bring their own biases fully to the text.


    Grand Magus wrote:
    By definition a scientist can not think she knows everything, or (s)he would not be doing science.

    Just FYI, I'm a professional scientist. I was listing absurd canards, not serious talking points.


    1 person marked this as a favorite.
    Jenner2057 wrote:
    Now granted, I'm sure SOME Christians think the Bible is verbatim true, but aren't they in the minority?

    Maybe it's regional. I live in Texas now, where pretty much everyone I know thinks it's 100% literal truth, that the Earth is 6,000 years old, and that "God made dinosaurs so we would have oil" (yes, someone actually said that). When I lived in South Carolina, it was much the same, except with the caveat that God hates Yankees.

    When I lived in New York, Connecticut, etc., it was exactly as you described. Anyone who claimed the Earth was 6,000 years old was immediately branded an outright loon by the rest of the Christian and Jewish communities.

    Different strokes, man.


    Kirth Gersen wrote:

    I live in Texas now, where pretty much everyone I know thinks it's 100% literal truth, that the Earth is 6,000 years old...

    That's just...special. I have a hard time imagining living in such a place.

    Maybe you've just been unfortunate?


    bugleyman wrote:

    I have a hard time imagining living in such a place.

    Maybe you've just been unfortunate?

    I feel like the title character in Heinlein's Job: A Comedy of Justice. He ends up in Texas, where he meets Satan and has a nice conversation with him in his home. Job finally remarks, "I thought you lived in Hell?"

    Satan replies, "We're in Hell. I annexed Texas a long time ago."

    If you're familiar with Jack Vance, I picked my screen name because I feel like I'm undercover Beyond, and if I slip up and admit I'm an atheist, I'll get "deweaseled."


    3 people marked this as a favorite.

    "Sorry kids. Science class has been canceled because your parents prefer to believe in magic."

    Dark Archive Bella Sara Charter Superscriber

    Evolution petrie dish? Do you mean peanut butter? Riddle me this Batman, if evolution is real, why is it that I've never opened a jar of peanut butter and discovered a fully developed, multi-cellular organism in such a jar? Like an ant. And not one that snuck in. One that evolved from peanut butter.

    Explain that with your so-called "science".


    1 person marked this as a favorite.
    Sebastian wrote:

    Evolution petrie dish? Do you mean peanut butter? Riddle me this Batman, if evolution is real, why is it that I've never opened a jar of peanut butter and discovered a fully developed, multi-cellular organism in such a jar? Like an ant. And not one that snuck in. One that evolved from peanut butter.

    Explain that with your so-called "science".

    ...Because maggots spontaneously generate from dead meat.

    Liberty's Edge

    Pathfinder Adventure, Adventure Path, Companion, Lost Omens, Pathfinder Accessories, Rulebook Subscriber
    Sebastian wrote:

    Evolution petrie dish? Do you mean peanut butter? Riddle me this Batman, if evolution is real, why is it that I've never opened a jar of peanut butter and discovered a fully developed, multi-cellular organism in such a jar? Like an ant. And not one that snuck in. One that evolved from peanut butter.

    Explain that with your so-called "science".

    *takes a shot*


    Sebastian wrote:

    Evolution petrie dish? Do you mean peanut butter? Riddle me this Batman, if evolution is real, why is it that I've never opened a jar of peanut butter and discovered a fully developed, multi-cellular organism in such a jar? Like an ant. And not one that snuck in. One that evolved from peanut butter.

    Explain that with your so-called "science".

    Have you checked any Twinkies?

    The Exchange

    Dare I ask what brought this on? For while it provides certain ponies with hours oh ok minutes of entertainment it seems really very silly.

    Dark Archive Bella Sara Charter Superscriber

    Crimson Jester wrote:
    Dare I ask what brought this on? For while it provides certain ponies with hours oh ok minutes of entertainment it seems really very silly.

    Are you implying that I have a short attention span and am easily amused?! Because, I'll tell you what, I...

    Oooh...is that a new hooker in the window?

    What was I saying?

    Bah. Never mind.

    Liberty's Edge

    Pathfinder Adventure, Adventure Path, Companion, Lost Omens, Pathfinder Accessories, Rulebook Subscriber
    Crimson Jester wrote:
    Dare I ask what brought this on? For while it provides certain ponies with hours oh ok minutes of entertainment it seems really very silly.

    Derail in the Herman Cain thread, I'd expect.

    The Exchange

    Sebastian wrote:
    Crimson Jester wrote:
    Dare I ask what brought this on? For while it provides certain ponies with hours oh ok minutes of entertainment it seems really very silly.

    Are you implying that I have a short attention span and am easily amused?! Because, I'll tell you what, I...

    Oooh...is that a new hooker in the window?

    What was I saying?

    Bah. Never mind.

    Somebody buy this man a hooker

    The Exchange

    Paul Watson wrote:
    Crimson Jester wrote:
    Dare I ask what brought this on? For while it provides certain ponies with hours oh ok minutes of entertainment it seems really very silly.
    Derail in the Herman Cain thread, I'd expect.

    Oh I stopped looking at that one. I thought it derailed days ago.


    Kirth Gersen wrote:

    Maybe it's regional. I live in Texas now, where pretty much everyone I know thinks it's 100% literal truth, that the Earth is 6,000 years old, and that "God made dinosaurs so we would have oil" (yes, someone actually said that). When I lived in South Carolina, it was much the same, except with the caveat that God hates Yankees.

    When I lived in New York, Connecticut, etc., it was exactly as you described. Anyone who claimed the Earth was 6,000 years old was immediately branded an outright loon by the rest of the Christian and Jewish communities.

    Different strokes, man.

    Kirth, you need to stop fighting this. Just except that a certain percentage -- for multiple reasons -- are just not going to accept evolution, the big bang, billions-years-old universe, etc. I'd recommend putting down the lance and let the windmills be...

    ...and instead turn your energies to marketing homeopathic remedies, Jeebus-on-toast forgeries, and eventually creating your own televangelist ministry/cult. Better the "rationally unreachable" turn over their cash to you than some disreputable person. ;)

    Seriously. And if you'd like to hire me, just let me know.


    Sebastian wrote:
    Crimson Jester wrote:
    Dare I ask what brought this on? For while it provides certain ponies with hours oh ok minutes of entertainment it seems really very silly.

    Are you implying that I have a short attention span and am easily amused?! Because, I'll tell you what, I...

    Oooh...is that a new hooker in the window?

    What was I saying?

    Bah. Never mind.

    How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? ... Wanna go ride bikes?!?


    2 people marked this as a favorite.
    Sebastian wrote:

    ...Riddle me this Batman, if evolution is real, why is it that I've never opened a jar of peanut butter and discovered a fully developed, multi-cellular organism in such a jar? Like an ant. And not one that snuck in. One that evolved from peanut butter.

    Explain that with your so-called "science".

    Ants evolving from peanut butter? That's absurd.

    Nano-kobolds evolve from peanut butter. But only the smooth kind; crunchy/chunky is too difficult to tunnel through with their sub-par mining skills. Nano-kobolds also reflect only ultraviolet light, which explains why you can't see them. Fortunately, I happen to sell special sunglasses to perceive them. Unfortunately, I just sold my last two pair to Roddy Piper. If you hurry, you can just catch him in the alley next door.

    Psst... Roddy is actually a pushover in a fight; I'm sure you can mug him easily and just take the sunglasses.


    1 person marked this as a favorite.
    Ambrosia Slaad wrote:

    ...and instead turn your energies to marketing homeopathic remedies, Jeebus-on-toast forgeries, and eventually creating your own televangelist ministry/cult. Better the "rationally unreachable" turn over their cash to you than some disreputable person. ;)

    Seriously. And if you'd like to hire me, just let me know.

    So I had this idea about a new business venture. basically it's a Chruch/Casino. We should do lunch. MAVERICK!

    Dark Archive

    Kirth Gersen wrote:

    Too late. And I'm counting down until we've heard all of these:

  • "If evolution is correct, then why are there still monkeys?"
  • "I don't believe that a 747 can be assembled out of random parts by a tornado!"
  • "Scientists think they know everything but it's obvious that people who don't know anything about science are far better suited to answer science questions because if you actually study a topic and work at it as a profession you're just putting on airs."
  • "Scientists are against God because they're scared of Him because they're immoral people, like Nazis."
  • you forgot:

  • "If you found a house/watch in the desert, you wouldn't assume it built itself!"

    Similar to your 747 example, I guess.

    My response is always: "Hold on, let me check my sundial for the time. Cuz, you know, watch design hasn't changed in a thousand years..."

  • Sovereign Court

    1 person marked this as a favorite.
    Ambrosia Slaad wrote:
    Psst... Roddy is actually a pushover in a fight; I'm sure you can mug him easily and just take the sunglasses.

    Unfortunately Roddy just ran out of bubblegum...

    Dark Archive

    1 person marked this as a favorite.
    Tiny Coffee Golem wrote:


    How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? ... Wanna go ride bikes?!?

    Knock knock.

    Who's there?

    Interrupting Co-efficient of Friction

    Interrupting Co-effic...

    Mu.

    Grand Lodge

    Callous Jack wrote:
    Ambrosia Slaad wrote:
    Psst... Roddy is actually a pushover in a fight; I'm sure you can mug him easily and just take the sunglasses.
    Unfortunately Roddy just ran out of bubblegum...

    I'm here to whup smurf and chew bubblesmurf... and I am all outta bubblesmurf...


    Callous Jack wrote:
    Ambrosia Slaad wrote:
    Psst... Roddy is actually a pushover in a fight; I'm sure you can mug him easily and just take the sunglasses.
    Unfortunately Roddy just ran out of bubblegum...

    {sets aside popcorn, whispers:} Shhhhh, don't tip off the Poni-boi.

    Sovereign Court

    Ambrosia Slaad wrote:
    Callous Jack wrote:
    Ambrosia Slaad wrote:
    Psst... Roddy is actually a pushover in a fight; I'm sure you can mug him easily and just take the sunglasses.
    Unfortunately Roddy just ran out of bubblegum...
    {sets aside popcorn, whispers:} Shhhhh, don't tip off the Poni-boi.

    Remember, he has a short attention span so just mention hookers.

    Or furries.

    Dark Archive Bella Sara Charter Superscriber

    2 people marked this as a favorite.

    I need a pair of sunglasses to enjoy these hookers. And a unicorn suit.

    Hey, you there, the big guy who's kicking the ever-loving s~&$ out of that other dude and trying to make him wear your sunglasses. I'll take those!

    Look, a#~***%, he doesn't even want them.

    I said, "Look, a%+@@@*, he doesn't even want them." Are you deaf and stupid?


    Flying Spagetti Monster. Discuss.

    Dark Archive

    Tiny Coffee Golem wrote:
    Flying Spagetti Monster. Discuss.

    CR 42 Demi-god

    AC: +2 Natural (al dente)
    SA: Carbs
    Weaknesses: Carbs

    Liberty's Edge

    Personal opinion only!!!
    The way I look at Genesis is as follows. God was trying to explain to man how everything was done but being that man had only just mastered the art of making permanent settlements and not much else as far as science. So when God first explained quantum physics and complex amino acids, he got blank stares. So he decided to give an allegory in a way that it was more easily understood by Bronze Age civilization. I see God as the "Ultimate Engineer" (or, as we Freemasons call him, "The Grand Architect of the Universe"). He is constantly tweaking and improving his designs until he finally perfects them. Not that there was anything wrong with the original designs to begin with! He just wanted (and still wants) to make them even better than they were until no further improvement or needed. Does this contradict some of the fundeMENTAList views? Yes but that is their problem, not mine!
    Again, personal opinion only

    I could also go into some more history about the ancient Israelite culture but I choose not to bore you all to death!


    1 person marked this as a favorite.
    Matthew Winn wrote:
    Tiny Coffee Golem wrote:
    Flying Spagetti Monster. Discuss.

    CR 42 Demi-god

    AC: +2 Natural (al dente)
    SA: Carbs
    Weaknesses: Carbs

    Demi-god? Heresy.

    Weaknesses? More Heresy.

    Keep it up and you'll have a good old fashioned religious war on your hands...


    bugleyman wrote:
    Matthew Winn wrote:
    Tiny Coffee Golem wrote:
    Flying Spagetti Monster. Discuss.

    CR 42 Demi-god

    AC: +2 Natural (al dente)
    SA: Carbs
    Weaknesses: Carbs

    Demi-god? Heresy.

    Weaknesses? More Heresy.

    Keep it up and you'll have a good old fashioned religious war on your hands...

    Don't repress my cultural heritage! Down with Ethnocentrism! *holds up lead sheet*

    Dark Archive

    bugleyman wrote:
    Matthew Winn wrote:
    Tiny Coffee Golem wrote:
    Flying Spagetti Monster. Discuss.

    CR 42 Demi-god

    AC: +2 Natural (al dente)
    SA: Carbs
    Weaknesses: Carbs

    Demi-god? Heresy.

    Weaknesses? More Heresy.

    Keep it up and you'll have a good old fashioned religious war on your hands...

    I should have clarified that only those silly "exercisers" consider it a weakness. That's why I also put it under Special Attacks...

    umm... and I meant Demi-Glace. Yeah. We believe that the FSM appears while bathing in a rich brown gravy.

    So as long as you can accept my differing religious view (AND you're not in the "FSM was actually a linguini" splinter group), we'll be ok.


    Matthew Winn wrote:
    FSM was actually a linguini

    HERESY! HE'S A WITCH! BURN HIM!


    Tiny Coffee Golem wrote:
    Matthew Winn wrote:
    FSM was actually a linguini
    HERESY! HE'S A WITCH! BURN HIM!

    Already building the pyre.

    Sadly, his material goods will be forfeit. I'll (reluctantly) take them in the name of true Pastafarians everywhere. Ramen.

    Dark Archive

    bugleyman wrote:
    Tiny Coffee Golem wrote:
    Matthew Winn wrote:
    FSM was actually a linguini
    HERESY! HE'S A WITCH! BURN HIM!

    Already building the pyre.

    Sadly, his material goods will be forfeit. I'll take them in the name of true Pastafarians. Ramen.

    WHOA! I specifically said I was NOT a Linguinist (wow, could that be taken wrong...)

    Put down your pitchforks! AND the parmesan! SAVE ME PASTA JEBUS!


    Matthew Winn wrote:
    bugleyman wrote:
    Tiny Coffee Golem wrote:
    Matthew Winn wrote:
    FSM was actually a linguini
    HERESY! HE'S A WITCH! BURN HIM!

    Already building the pyre.

    Sadly, his material goods will be forfeit. I'll take them in the name of true Pastafarians. Ramen.

    WHOA! I specifically said I was NOT a Linguinist (wow, could that be taken wrong...)

    Put down your pitchforks! AND the parmesan! SAVE ME PASTA JEBUS!

    I'm sorry, were you looking for logic and reason from a extremist religious group? *laughs and laughs and laughs*

    Dark Archive

    Tiny Coffee Golem wrote:
    Matthew Winn wrote:
    bugleyman wrote:
    Tiny Coffee Golem wrote:
    Matthew Winn wrote:
    FSM was actually a linguini
    HERESY! HE'S A WITCH! BURN HIM!

    Already building the pyre.

    Sadly, his material goods will be forfeit. I'll take them in the name of true Pastafarians. Ramen.

    WHOA! I specifically said I was NOT a Linguinist (wow, could that be taken wrong...)

    Put down your pitchforks! AND the parmesan! SAVE ME PASTA JEBUS!

    I'm sorry, were you looking for logic and reason from a extremist religious group? *laughs and laughs and laughs*

    Sorry. Can't talk now. Sizzling.


    Matthew Winn wrote:
    WHOA! I specifically said I was NOT a Linguinist

    Like that matters.

    *stokes flames*

    Hey, look at his Blu-ray collection...


    1 person marked this as a favorite.
    Kirth Gersen wrote:
    "Scientists think they know everything but it's obvious that people who don't know anything about science are far better suited to answer science questions because if you actually study a topic and work at it as a profession you're just putting on airs."

    IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH


    Kevida wrote:

    Personal opinion only!!!

    The way I look at Genesis is as follows. God was trying to explain to man how everything was done but being that man had only just mastered the art of making permanent settlements and not much else as far as science. So when God first explained quantum physics and complex amino acids, he got blank stares. So he decided to give an allegory in a way that it was more easily understood by Bronze Age civilization.

    As much as i like the (relatively) more plausible explanation it seems rather odd that the real gods creation myth is no more accurate than anyone elses. For example, the order of creation is wrong (birds evolved well after land animals for examples)


    BigNorseWolf wrote:
    Kevida wrote:

    Personal opinion only!!!

    The way I look at Genesis is as follows. God was trying to explain to man how everything was done but being that man had only just mastered the art of making permanent settlements and not much else as far as science. So when God first explained quantum physics and complex amino acids, he got blank stares. So he decided to give an allegory in a way that it was more easily understood by Bronze Age civilization.
    As much as i like the (relatively) more plausible explanation it seems rather odd that the real gods creation myth is no more accurate than anyone elses. For example, the order of creation is wrong (birds evolved well after land animals for examples)

    Ah, but the original birds were primarily composed of neutrinos, so they were created later but showed up first.

    I saw it explained on last seasons' Inspector Spacetime. Poor FE-Line had an awful time fighting off the CyberPenguins.

    The Exchange

    1 person marked this as a favorite.
    Ambrosia Slaad wrote:
    Callous Jack wrote:
    Ambrosia Slaad wrote:
    Psst... Roddy is actually a pushover in a fight; I'm sure you can mug him easily and just take the sunglasses.
    Unfortunately Roddy just ran out of bubblegum...
    {sets aside popcorn, whispers:} Shhhhh, don't tip off the Poni-boi.

    The Sooner you accept String Theory as your only truth we can move on to selecting sheldon as a high priest.

    {steals ambrosia slaads popcorn and giggles}

    The Exchange

    yellowdingo wrote:
    Ambrosia Slaad wrote:
    Callous Jack wrote:
    Ambrosia Slaad wrote:
    Psst... Roddy is actually a pushover in a fight; I'm sure you can mug him easily and just take the sunglasses.
    Unfortunately Roddy just ran out of bubblegum...
    {sets aside popcorn, whispers:} Shhhhh, don't tip off the Poni-boi.

    The Sooner you accept String Theory as your only truth we can move on to selecting sheldon as a high priest.

    {steals ambrosia slaads popcorn and giggles}

    Quantum gravity...

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